Limerence

by Bicyclette

Part I

The Princess of the Night had a good reason to avoid Manehattan.

It was not that she had never known a city like it in her time. So many new advances in both technology and society had occurred while she was still on the moon. So many things that still bewildered her even now, years after her return and redemption. The ones that allowed a million ponies to live cheek-to-muzzle, flank-to-flank, crammed into the city’s apartments and tenements were hardly the most disquieting.

It was not that, at night, the streetlights drowned out the feeble pinpricks of her beloved stars in the firmament. Reducing even her mighty moon to a co-starring role in the urban constellation, muscled from its privileged place by the brightness of neon lights and incandescent bulbs. A part of her took a perverse pleasure in having been proven right, in a small way: that the ponies of Equestria did not, after all, really need the light of the natural sun to relish and play in.

She avoided Manehattan because of what the city looked like from the Dreamlands.

It was the reason why, despite her purview being all of Equestria, the Princess of the Night only visited the dreams of ponies in places like Canterlot or Cloudsdale, whose inhabitants numbered in the thousands or tens of thousands. The stories that their dreams told about each other were simple enough to be legible. Few enough for her to feel like she could truly know them. To be able to be the guardian, mentor, or friend that they needed.

But Manehattan was a city of a million ponies. A million ponies with a million dreams. A million mindscapes melding together into a thick forest, dense and gnarled and twisting, blending together their wishes and wants and pains and doubts. So many dreams at once for her to process that she could not help but see the patterns and commonalities between them. Could not help but feel somewhere deep in her mind that these wonderful creatures were not each unique and singular souls, but rather simple animals of predictable desires and fears.

She could not stand it. She could not stand seeing them this way, and the feelings that regard brought about in her. But she also could not stand admitting to herself that to her, Equestria did not truly include the places where most of its inhabitants lived. That she thought about the sleepy little farming town of Ponyville far more than grand cities like Whinnyapolis, Fillydelphia, or Baltimare, each a hundred times its size.

So the Princess of the Night chose to turn her gaze towards Manehattan once more, expecting to see what she had seen on all the previous nights. That thick forest of dreams, stretching out in every direction, filling her vision and sense of space, disorienting her until she was overwhelmed enough to concede, telling herself that she had tried her level best, and that there was no dishonor in admitting defeat.

But this night was not like most nights.

This night, from deep within Manehattan’s dark tangle of a million reveries, one dream shone in particular, bright and strong and clear. A passionate vision of sparkling white and brilliant diamond and rich indigo, piercing the murk and mire with its dazzling strength.

Intrigued, the Princess of the Night turned to it.

---

The Element of Generosity shone brightly like always.

Not in a literal glow, but in the way her words floated up and down the tonal range as that theatrical timbre infused her voice with an effusive energy. It was a version of her that was distilled down to the essence of her traits, as ponies met in dreams often were. All in all, a brilliant performance by the subconscious that summoned it, taking up so much space that Luna, for a moment, forgot that she was here to find the dreamer, not the dream.

She was easy enough to spot, being the only other creature in this recreation of Rarity’s Manehattan shop. A demure young earthpony of light pastels: a cream coat, an adorable lavender collar around her neck, and a bob-cut cyan mane. And cyan eyes. Eyes that were clearly only for the subject of her dream, gazing at the apparition of Rarity with an unspoken longing as the unicorn chattered on and on about some reconstructed anecdote.

“So,” the image of Rarity intoned, “that is why my return to Ponyville is delayed for a day. Can you believe it, Miss Pommel?”

The earthpony simply nodded silently, as Rarity continued in her dramatics.

“The worst! Possible! Thing! An entire day in Manehattan without a single thing planned! And it would be so outré to make new ones at the last minute. Oh, what-ever shall I do to fill my time?” She flopped herself expertly onto a chaise-longue that had appeared out of nowhere in a fit of dream logic, placing the back of a hoof on her forehead in a classic woe-is-me. With the hoof still on her forehead, she turned to look at the dreamer directly.

“Have you any ideas, Miss Coco?”

Luna saw the earthpony open her mouth to speak, as well as the worry in her eyes when no words found their way out of her mouth. The worry became a shrunken-pupil terror as the silence stretched into an uncomfortable length.

The image of Rarity spoke with annoyance in her voice. “Miss Pom-mel, I do believe that I have asked you a question, and the only polite thing one can do in such a case is to give a response. What-ever shall-I-do?”

She closed her mouth and opened it again, as if the action would reset something in her, but there was no apparent change in that frozen expression of uncertainty. Luna frowned, the discomfort in the air getting strong enough for even her to feel secondhand, as the expression on the image of Rarity’s face soured further.

“Miss Pom-mel,” she spat, with uncharacteristic venom. “I have hired you as an assistant to assist me, which includes speaking when spoken to! If you are suddenly unable to perform even the most basic of your duties, then I see no reason for us to continue our professional relationship. I will expect you to clear out your personal effects from the back office immediately, and--”

The image of Rarity froze mid-sentence, her mouth still half-open in her contemptuous snarl. Luna could see the confusion in the dreamer’s eyes as she took a moment to process what had happened. Then, the shock as she recognized the image of the alicorn in front of her.

“Princess Luna!” the young earthpony exclaimed. “Oh, I thought that you never came into the dreams of Manehattan ponies--”

The dreamer closed up her mouth with her hooves, horrified at what she had just said. Luna just gave her a chastised smile.

“Yes, it is true that it is rare for me to visit the dreams of the ponies of these lands. But that does not mean I never do. Now.” She pointed at the brilliant apparition with a wing. “Do tell me about her. And yourself.”

“Oh, that’s Miss Rarity! But you knew that already, didn’t you?”

Luna nodded. “Our paths have crossed many times, and I am honored to be able to call her a friend.”

“Oh, of course!” the earthpony marveled. “She is such an amazing pony, of course she would know the Princesses personally!”

Luna smiled. “I assure you, knowing me personally is hardly an amazing feat.” But from Coco’s reaction, Luna could tell she did not believe those words. Well, of little matter. “Now, from what I have seen so far in this dream, I take it that you are one of her assistants, Miss… Coco, was it?”

“Coco Pommel!” she confirmed brightly. “And yes, I am! Shop assistant, design assistant, well, every type of assistant, really! And it’s such an honor for me. To be able to work so closely with such a brilliant mind. I mean, look!”

Despite her lack of unicorn magic, with a wave of her hoof, Coco conjured forth an array of dresses from around the shop to display themselves in front of Luna. Such was the power of the Dreamlands.

“Aren’t these designs absolutely genius?”

Luna looked them over politely, but did not voice her thoughts. Her thoughts about how they so profligately used the gemstones and silks that were much rarer in her time to the point where they no longer held the sacred meaning that scarcity imparted. How their unfamiliar cuts struck her with a deep sense of impropriety if she imagined them on the ponies of the Grand Galloping Galas of old. How they used their shapes and patterns as mere ingredients to be stirred and mixed at will into a batter by taste, instead of letters of an alphabet to be carefully assembled into words, words into coherent sentences, sentences into flowing poems.

Instead, she just gave the excited earthpony an apologetic smile.

“I must admit, I do not have the best eye for these things. My sense of fashion is, well, about a millenium out of date, I’m afraid.”

“Ah!” Coco realized. “Of course, that makes sense! I mean, that’s okay.” With another wave of her hoof, she made the dresses disappear. “I guess you aren’t here in my dream to talk about fashion.”

“Indeed, I am not,” Luna confirmed. “What drew me to your dreams was her.”

She gestured at the frozen image of Rarity, still somehow glowingly radiant despite the scowl on her face.

“The way she appears in your dream. All brilliance and splendor. It is not mere admiration. It is something more, is it not?”

“Something more?” Coco asked quizzically. Then, her cheeks flushed. “Oh! Well, I mean… I suppose…“

Luna laughed comfortingly, and laid a wing softly on her withers. “Worry not. What I see within these dreams is strictly confidential. It would be a stain on my honor as the Princess of the Night for it to be otherwise. I am here to help you.“

Coco blinked. “Help me? With what?”

“With learning to speak your feelings.“

With a practiced shimmer of her horn, she manipulated the dream to take on the form of Rarity, as Coco looked on in surprise.

“Now, Miss Pom-mel,” she spoke, relishing the emphasis on the second syllable. “It appears as if a mixup has caused me to delay my return to Ponyville for a day. Can you imagine? An entire day with not a single thing on my social cal-en-dar! Oh, what-ever shall I do to fill my time?”

Coco’s eyes widened, and she opened her mouth to speak, but once more, not a single word found its way out. Luna batted Rarity’s eyelashes at her expectantly, which at least elicited an “I… I…” from the struggling earthpony, but nothing else. Frowning, the Princess of the Night cast off Rarity’s form and voice, and spoke gently with her own.

“Now, Coco. For you ponies, this is the purpose of dreams. A chance for your minds to simulate and face the challenges that await you in the waking world, but without the frightening consequences. The only wrong thing to do is exactly what you would do in waking life.”

“I’m so sorry, Princess Luna.” Coco frowned. “It’s just that you sound just like her!”

Luna could not help but beam at that. “Back in the old days, my sister and I shared a love of the theatrical arts. Though I was by far the better actress. But I do apologize. I should be more encouraging. This is your opportunity, Coco. Do not be afraid to take it. Now, let us try this again.”

Donning the form of Rarity once more, Luna looked deep into the sky-blue of Coco’s eyes, and smiled. “Now, Miss Pom-mel. I do believe you were meaning to tell me something before we were so rudely interrupted. Ticket mixup. No train. Empty schedule. What do you have to say about that?“

Coco stammered. “I… I…”

Luna held her smile, even when it looked like the silence would stretch on into an interminable length once again. But then, after a nervous swallow, a bit of steel found its way into Coco’s eyes, and she began to speak with a surprising passion.

“I think about you every second that you’re not here! You are the sun in my sky! I never even knew how gray and dull and mediocre my life was before meeting you! You are a shard of brilliance that fell into it, like a crashing comet from a world above this one, a world I never thought I would ever have a chance to even touch, let alone be a part of, even if it’s in the small way that I am! And I have nightmares every night about losing you, because I know I can’t possibly compare to what your brilliance expects and deserves! I can’t even let myself dream that I could ever deserve you!”

Luna’s face fell, which meant Rarity’s did as well.

“Er… aouhweoh,” she said, very realistically, before switching back to her original form and voice.

“Perhaps it would be better to say something on the order of proposing a pleasant evening together. A stroll through Manehattan Park. A play at Bridleway. Something along those lines.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry Princess.” The bright red on Coco’s cheeks contrasted strongly with her pale coat. “I, uh, got a bit carried away, didn’t I?”

“A little bit. It was something perhaps better reserved for beyond the first date. A good deal further.”

Coco hid her face with her hooves. “Oh, I must have sounded crazy! I don’t think anything I said even made sense! I’m so embarrassed!”

With a comforting smile, Luna patted her gently on the withers with a wing, until Coco was able to peek back at her from between her hooves.

“Do not be ashamed. It was actually a very passionate declaration. Why,” she chuckled, “back in my day, I have heard many similar speeches that have stirred my heart. Yours would have ranked among them.”

“Oh!” Coco’s eyes widened in surprise, and she laughed nervously, which caused Luna to frown.

“What is so funny?”

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Princess Luna. I just have a hard time imagining an Alicorn Princess being interested in such things.”

“Ah, yes.” Luna blinked. “Yes, that’s right. You would have a hard time, wouldn’t you?”

From the look in Coco’s eyes, Luna could tell she did not have an answer, but to be fair, it was not a question Luna expected an answer to. She smiled gently.

“Well. Rest assured, I actually have plenty of experience in such matters. Now.” With a glow of her horn, she took on the form of Rarity once more. “Why don’t we try this again?”

---

The Princess of the Night dreams during the day.

She does not get nightmares on her own, like ponies do, their own minds punishing themselves for their guilts and fears so as to better prepare them to face the challenges and dangers of their waking life. The mind of an alicorn does not work that way. All the better, for what it takes to create alicorn nightmares is too powerful. Too dangerous. Too prone to leaking out into the world of the awake—a lesson that she had learned all too well.

So the Princess of the Night allows herself to dream. Hardly anything to note on most days, when her dreams are tranquil and featureless landscapes with nary an other soul.

This day, like many other days before it, she dreamt of something wonderful. Starting so similarly to all the other times. The gentle caress of a hoof on her coat, the preen of a mouth on her wing. A soft muzzle, pressed against her ear. A breathy voice, whispering sweet nothings into it. If only it had ended there.

If only she had not seen those familiar eyes, staring into her own, the most intimate trust and vulnerability radiating from them. If only she had not heard that familiar voice, so gentle and loving, speak those familiar words she had heard so often before. Those three words that cut at her, deep into her soul.

The Princess of the Night jolted awake, anguished.

---

The Element of Generosity smiled at her assistant.

Behind the mask, Luna smiled genuinely. Coco had progressed wonderfully over the past few moons under her guidance, and their little simulations had become more like improvised plays, with Luna relishing in how she got to really sink into her character of Rarity the Unicorn. And was this more confident Coco a character as well, being played by the shy, shrinking young mare that she had first met?

Did it matter? Luna waved away such thoughts, and sank back into her role. She could believe that she and Coco really were sitting here on a bench on the edge of Battery Park. She really could feel the breeze coming off the Cudson River, hear the background chatter of the anonymous ponies passing in front of them on the path. See, in a new light, that sense of admiration in Coco’s eyes. She was Rarity now.

“Oh, what a wonderful evening it has been, Miss Pom-mel!” Rarity intoned. “I was afraid that a day without a schedule would be a day wasted, but who knew that a simple stroll through the city streets without a worry in the world would be exactly what I needed?”

“Yes, isn’t it wonderful how the city opens up to you when you are here without a fashion show to enter in, or a friendship problem to solve?“

“Ah, yes! Playing the flaneuse has been oh-so-much fun!“ Rarity beamed. “You have truly shown me the beauty of the city today, and I cannot thank you enough for it. ”

“Well.” Coco smiled at her. “But that’s what you do every day, isn’t it? Bring out the beauty you see in the things around you. That’s your gift to the world.”

Rarity laughed airily, and fluttered her eyelashes. “Oh, Miss Coco! How could I possibly accept such a generous compliment?”

“Ah, Rarity.”

Rarity blinked, a bit taken aback by the firmness of the reply.

“I think ‘Coco’ is just fine. We know each other well enough now, don’t you think?”

“Ah, yes. I suppose you are right.” Rarity frowned. “Perhaps I have been thinking of you more as my assistant rather than a—”

“Friend?”

“I was going to say colleague, but yes, friend as well.” Rarity looked down guiltily. “Oh, to still think of you that way after the wonderful day we shared. I do hope you forgive me. I realize now that we have known each other for years, but I hardly know about you in the way that you know about me. That while I would often go on and on about the troubles of my personal life back in Ponyville, I would never ask you about yours.“

“Oh, it’s not your fault, Rarity. Honestly, I was more than happy to just listen to you talk about yourself. You tell the story of your life with such flourish. Like every little incident was the scene of a grand play.“

Rarity giggled her exaggerated little giggle. “I must say, Coco, that is the most complimentary way anypony has ever called me overly dramatic.“

Coco laughed. “But it’s true! And I couldn’t imagine anything I had to say about my own life could be nearly as interesting. So it took me a while to find my voice.”

“Well, I am most glad that you have, Coco.” Rarity smiled at her. “I must say, it has been unexpectedly refreshing, seeing this side of your personality. I just wish that I could have helped bring it out earlier.“ She sighed. “But it is exciting, this new prospect of getting to truly know the mare that has been at my side for all these years.”

“Oh, but you already do know some things, Rarity,” Coco insisted. “You know about my love of community theater.”

“Yes, and it took my cutie mark magically glowing before I showed such an interest!“ Rarity despaired. “That day should have been when it started. Seeing the possibility of reviving something so wonderful. I should have seen the potential in you. I should have gotten to know you better then. But I practically ignored you after the ‘mission’ was done!”

“But I understood. You had somepony else on your mind at the time.”

Rarity smiled an embarrassed smile. “Yes, I did, didn’t I?”

A stretch of silence passed between them. Rarity shifted her eyes nervously, but Coco gave her a steady look until they could meet her gaze.

“Rarity. Have you ever considered that you belong up here?”

Rarity blinked. “Whatever do you mean, Coco?”

“Every time you visit, you gush to me about how wonderful it is to be in a place so lively, so teeming. How much prouder you are of Rarity For You than your other stores, because the competition is so much fiercer here. Every time you leave, you despair about how long it will be until the next time you can come back. So why leave?“

Rarity frowned. “But Ponyville is my home. I grew up there. It’s where I started, with the Carousel Boutique, being Ponyville’s ambassador from the world of haute couture.”

“Exactly!” Coco agreed. “You’re the town’s fashion horse. Everypony trusts you to make their dresses and gowns beautiful.” She added a bit of steel to her voice. “Just like they trust the town’s baker to make them a delicious cake.”

Rarity frowned, and turned her eyes away, even as Coco gently laid a hoof on her back.

“But is that where you were really meant to be? Those tastemaker ponies you admire, like Photo Finish and Trenderhoof, that your whole little town gets excited about when they deign to visit? They live here. And you’re their equal, even though you don’t talk about them like you are.”

Rarity felt Coco taking her hooves into her own, and finally turned to look at her again.

“Up here, you can be around ponies who truly appreciate you. Ponies that see you for who you are, and celebrate it, instead of trying to hammer you into the box that they need you to be in.”

She saw the passion in her eyes.

“Yes, I suppose that does sound quite wonderful.” Rarity sighed. “To be understood, and not dismissed as quirky, needless, and impractical. Emotional.”

“Yes!” Coco held Rarity’s hooves tighter, and brought her face closer. “And you deserve somepony who makes you unafraid to be who you are. Who understands your field, instead of thinking that Stinky Bottom's Discount Hat Emporium is the height of it. Who would do anything to help you reach your potential, because she truly believed in what you are doing.”

“That… That does sound nice.”

Their muzzles were almost touching now, and Rarity could see how the brilliant cyan of her mane, reflected in the cyan of her eyes that seemed now as deep and as refreshing as a waterfall pond on the hottest summer day.

“Yes, that does sound quite wonderful.” Her eyes drifted to Coco’s lips, so round and soft and inviting. “As is this sensation of meeting you anew.” Her own voice softened to an almost whisper, as they approached—

“This would be a good place to stop, don’t you think?”

Luna blinked, suddenly remembering who she was. “Ah, yes,” she said, in Rarity’s voice for one last time, before casting off the unicorn’s image and speaking with her own. “Yes, we did both agree on that, didn’t we?” She tried to keep her voice from sounding flustered. “I admit, I was able to fall quite deep into the performance. It is a testament to how far you’ve come.”

Coco giggled, bashfully averting her gaze, Luna noted how the confident Coco of earlier had seemingly reverted a bit just now.

“Ah, yes, ‘performance’ is the right word, isn’t it?” Coco said.

She smiled, and Luna could see that not everything had reverted: the intensity with which the earthpony was looking at her did not seem much different from earlier.

“Yours was truly amazing, Princess!” she marveled at an almost-whisper. “It really was like I was talking with Rarity the whole time. It was almost perfect. But, uh.” She cast her eyes down. “There was one thing that you could never manage to get right.”

Luna frowned. “There was?”

“Yes.” Coco looked up and smiled at her nervously. “Your eyes.”

“My eyes?” Luna puzzled. “But no, their color should have changed with the spell.”

“Oh, they did! I mean, moderate cyan to moderate azure, at least!” Coco got out with confidence, before averting her gaze again. “But, uh, it was more than a color. No matter what, there was always a deep sadness in them. A true depth that Rarity’s never had. And though I originally meant the things I wanted to say for Rarity, I, um…” She swallowed nervously, and turned her gaze back to Luna. “I’ve come to realize that for a while now they were really meant for you.”

Luna stared in shock as she processed this. As she did, she saw something in Coco’s eyes, looking back at her. Something familiar. Something she had been seeing all along, but did not want to admit that she had. Nor to think about it.

And in Coco’s eyes just now, something else flashed. Recognition.

“Princess Luna,” she began, with a bit more confidence in her voice. “Like I said, I’ve always seen your true self in your eyes. I saw that you were more than just acting. You feel it too, don’t you?”

She should have denied it flatly, but could not bring herself to. Instead, she was only silent.

“So you do feel it!” Coco gave an excited whisper. “Don’t you, Princess?”

She should have looked straight into her eyes and lied, but could not bear the thought. Instead, she closed her eyes and said, “Even if I do, that does not mean I can act on it. I cannot allow myself.”

“But why can’t you, Princess?” Coco reached out to gently place a hoof on her cheek. “Why can’t you let yourself?”

She should have pushed her away, but could not reject the softness of her caress. Instead, she said, “I am afraid.”

“Afraid?” A shocked sympathy filled Coco’s voice. “What could you possibly be so afraid of, Princess?”

Even without opening her eyes, Luna could sense Coco bringing her muzzle closer to Luna’s own. The offer of her mouth.

“It’s just the two of us here, alone. Isn’t this the purpose of dreams?”

She could imagine the softness of her lips. She could imagine pressing her own against them. Of tasting them. Of tasting—

A sob broke out of her, ragged and sharp. “I simply cannot,” she squeaked. “I’m so sorry, Rose.”

Realizing what she had just said, the Princess of the Night grimaced, and slowly opened up her eyes to the sight of Coco looking back at her in confusion.

“Rose?”

Comments

[Sledge115]

“Rose?”

Ah, fuck.

Anyways, this was a phenomenal start to the story, Bike. I like the vivid emotions in the opening, really sets the stage for the rest of the story. I will say that Coco doesn't particularly feel like she has equal footing with Luna here in terms of character focus - but that is the point, isn't it?

“I’m so sorry, Princess Luna.” Coco frowned. “It’s just that you sound just like her!”

I can't believe you've done this.

[Dashie04]

It’s just that you sound just like her!

It’s because they share the same voice actor, of course.

Anyways, so far, I’m really liking the reasoning for why Luna doesn’t usually visit Manehatten, she can’t be everywhere at once, and her avoidance of Manehatten helps her manage her time better.

[The Sleepless Beholder]

I really like this interpretation of how Luna sees the dreams of ponies in the Dreamland and how that impacts not only her job but her own vision of herself. And Coco's sudden speech, spilling out everything the moment she can force herself to talk, it explains perfectly why her dreams have been like this before Luna's intervention. I also love Luna, and this interpretation too.

Rose, uh? Let's see where this goes.

[applejackofalltrades]

She was easy enough to spot, being the only other creature in this recreation of Rarity’s Manehattan shop. A demure young earthpony of light pastels: a cream coat, an adorable lavender collar around her neck, and a bob-cut cyan mane. And cyan eyes. Eyes that were clearly only for the subject of her dream, gazing at the apparition of Rarity with an unspoken longing as the unicorn chattered on and on about some reconstructed anecdote.

I'd like it to be known that I am eating dinner right now and, with a mouth full of chicken and rice, I miserably (unrelated to the story type of misery) mumbled "Coco?"

Anyway hoo-wee. Your writing sure is something, ain't it? The way you write is so flowy and fun to read. I love your prose, and the characterization of these... well these characters. I find myself intrigued in the plot of the story, and I also found myself so enthralled in that last bit that I, too, forgot it was Luna acting as Rarity and not just genuinely Rarity.

Can't wait to keep reading and see what you've got in store for us. That sure was quite a cliff hanger. I'm glad I get to just hit next chapter