Slice of Velvet and Pear

by David Silver

72 - The Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000 Part Two

With the Apple family, honorary members included, working together, they got up a smaller house just for the brothers. Applejack flashed a satisfied smile. "There ya go. Yer welcome to grab meals with us, but ya got privacy an' whatnot."

The brothers considered with rubbing hooves on chins. Flim inclined his head. "A bit basic--"

"--But the price is right," concluded Flam. "We'll get settled in."

"Wait! Um." Moon stepped forward. "I was hoping, if you had time and inclination, you could show me how to improve. You two seem like naturals when it comes to arcane engineering."

Flim lifted an ear at Moon. "Funny thing, but I never really thought about that."

"We always figured sales was more of our specialty." Flam waved at their parked Cider Squeezy 6000. "It was a passing notion to create this."

"And when it actually worked!" Flim clapped his hooves. "We were so excited."

Moon's ears perked with growing enthusiasm. "When you created the cider machine, did you work from spell diagrams or runic schematics to calibrate the stabilization matrix?"

The unicorn brothers exchanged a blank look.

"Er, stabil-what now?" Flim scratched his head.

"We just kinda winged it," Flam said with an airy laugh. "Flim had the idea to automate cider making using levitation spells and a press system. I handled fabrication and charming the mechanical bits. Never got too fancy with the technical aspects - so long as it worked!"

He nudged his brother with a grin. "Ol' Flim here's better at the publicity and pizzazz anyway. Put him in front of a crowd and he'll have 'em eating out of his hoof in no time flat!"

Flim swept into an elaborate bow. "You know it! We each play to our strengths - together the perfect sales team!"

Apple Bloom trotted over and stared up at the brothers with wide, curious eyes. "But don'tcha actually gotta know how yer doodad works? What if somethin' breaks?"

"Why, we'd call a repairpony of course!" Flim said, as though it were obvious. At the filly's skeptical look, he waved a breezy hoof. "Our expertise lies in the business side of things, my dear - we'll handle promotion and distribution and leave the tinkering to the professionals."

Moon frowned, looking mildly disappointed by their cavalier attitudes toward the technical workings. But then she smiled, an idea clearly brewing. "In that case, perhaps I could be of assistance understanding the functional principles. If you'll permit me to examine the internal components and spell matrix?"

The brothers shared an uneasy glance, their protective hoof-crafted machine now under scrutiny. But with the Apples watching expectantly, they reluctantly nodded.

"Er, sure, knock yourself out," Flam said, forcing a grin. "Just uh, be gentle with our baby over there..."

"I will proceed with complete caution." Eyes alight, Moon closed on the strange machine, ready to tear it apart. For science, of course.

Applejack threw a leg over Flam's withers. "Don't you worry none. If she damages it, she's friends with some powerful ponies. She'll get it fixed, or call somepony who can. Now, the way ah see it, if she can figure out how it works, you two may be in fer more bits."

Flim's eyes shined with the idea. "Now you're talking. How would her curious prodding result in that?"

Applejack released Flam as she turned to where Moon dug around inside the machine. "Moon ain't a bad pony. Pretty sure she'll give credit where credit's due. Ya two went and kinda winged it, but ya still did it! Right, Moon?"

"Correct," drifted her voice from inside it, her head wedged within the machine. "This is fascinating... I would never have considered..."

"Glad to inspire!" Flam called out jovially. Though his smile faltered a bit as the sound of clanking metal emitted from where Moon was burrowed. "Just, uh...remember we need all the pieces put back where you found them!"

Flim nodded, eyeing his brother. Applejack's words sparked tempting ideas - they hadcreated something truly unique, even if more by luck than skill. If this studious mare could decode their machine's inner workings and refine the system...why, the profit potential could be astronomical!

"Say, Miss Moon Dancer," Flim began casually. "What do you plan to do with any, mm...let's say insights you gain from analyzing our little invention there?" He waved a hoof, affecting nonchalance. "Just curious, no pressure."

The response echoed faintly from inside the machine's depths. "Oh, I would share them of course! I have no desire to steal your thunder, but think how many ponies could benefit from efficient automated production like this! Why, applied on a broader scale--"

"Applied on a broader scale indeed!" Flim's eyes gleamed greedily. "I do like the way you think, Miss Moon. Once you unravel all our secrets, perhaps we could collaborate? Spread cider-making revolution across Equestria! With your brains and our business savvy..."

"...we'd make a fortune!" crowed Flam, clapping eagerly with his brother. Riches danced in their minds just imagining it.

Applejack cocked a brow, expression ambiguous. Then she chuckled and leaned an elbow on Flim's back. "Now don't go forgettin' your deal here on Sweet Apple Acres," she drawled. "10% of sales plus room and board, that's the bargain."

Her half-lidded gaze bored into the brothers. "Y'all are part of the Apple family now...and we take care of our own." The message behind her smile glinted. Reneging would not be tolerated - nor wise for their health.

The Flim Flam brothers gulped. "Oh absolutely, no question!" Flim said hurriedly. "You Apples are our top priority!"

"Cider partners for life!" added Flam with weak jazz hooves.

Applejack smirked and stood back with a firm nod, crisis apparently averted. The lure of bits was strong for these two, but she aimed to keep them firmly tethered to the family business.

From inside the machine came an impressed "Ooooh!" as Moon Dancer continued plumbing its inner workings, blissfully unaware of outside machinations.

She popped free, magic holding up a specific little crystal. "Do you know what the exact purpose of this is?"

Flim leaned in to examine it. "Now... I recall every time we removed it, the checks--"

"--and balances would deactivate," finished Flam. "Terrible. Much faster, but the quality dipped dangerously low. If you want a lot--"

"--of cider, that is how you do it." Flim nodded lightly. "Please put that back."

"Of course." Moon dipped back into the machine to get the crystal back where it started. "It has a fascinating aetherial network. There's so much to be learned in here... This has uses outside of cider production."

Both brother's perked at that. Flam chuckled softly. "Of course! Our genius will revolutionize all of Equestria!"

"It might." Moon could be heard working deeper bit by bit. "Mmmm."

Flim inclined his head. "I'm not used to ponies agreeing with that so easily."

"Why shouldn't I?" came Moon Dancer's voice, slightly muffled. She wriggled back into view to flash the brothers an earnest smile. "You've created a spell matrix here that disrupts molecular cohesion. Just think of the applications!"

She flopped a hoof enthusiastically. "Construction projects would be far more expedient detaching materials versus manual demolition. We could erect entire city blocks overnight! And replacing something as simple as a door would become trivial..."

Her horn lit up as she levitated a loose bolt before them. "Observe..." The bolt glowed, then duplicated itself with a flash. Soon a small pile of identical bolts lay neatly stacked before an awed Flim and Flam.

"Fascinating!" breathed Flam. "I had no idea our system was capable of that..."

His brother hurriedly scooped the surplus bolts into his hat. "Indeed, such utility had never even occurred to us! Your insights could elevate this machine far beyond our humble cider-making vision." He playfully elbowed Flam. "Perhaps we DID make the right call partnering up with the Apples and their impressive unicorns, eh?"

"Eeeyup!"

Big Mac ambled over, two mugs of fresh-pressed cider balanced on his back. He passed one to Applejack who accepted it with a grin.

"Thanks big bro." She took a long swig then let out a satisfied sigh. "Nothin' beats sweet Apple Acres cider, even if these yahoo's machine does speed things up."

The brothers wilted a bit at the gentle jab. Flim rallied first, straightening his hat. "Yes, well, there's clearly untapped potential here waiting to be developed!" He nodded to Moon Dancer, still engrossed tinkering with the cider maker's inner components. "I propose we establish a joint venture - the four of us as founding partners. My salespony panache, your inventive genius..."

He spread his hooves wide, framing an invisible sign. "Flim, Flam and Moon Dancer's Fantastical Contraptions!"

His brother echoed the wide grin. Finally, their ticket to the big time! With brains like Moon Dancer's combined with the brothers' business savvy, lucrative success was guaranteed.

Though a quiet throat-clearing sound from behind them added a stark note of reality. They turned to find Applejack watching them with distinctly unimpressed half-lowered eyes.

"Ahem. Did y'all forget your contractual obligation to us Apples again already?" She took a long, deliberate sip of cider, never blinking. "Flim Flam n' Moon Dancer's Fantastical Contraptions would owe a heapin' helpin' of that revenue stream back to where it started, wouldn't they?"

Flam inclined his head. "Our deal was for the apples, and the cider created thereby. You don't even own that." He waved at the machine. "You're just leasing it, remember?"

Moon popped her head free. "He has a point."

"Moon!" Applejack swatted at her with her hat. "Look... We helped, and are helpin'. Don't go fergettin' us so quickly."

Flim nodded with a sly smirk. "10%" He pointed at Applejack. "Your way. 90% our way. That feels far more fair for any business we do that doesn't involve cider. And before you complain, it's free bits for you. You don't even have to do anything."

Applejack chuckled softly, having that ten percent thrown right back at her. "Well, shoot..." If she complained, she'd be admitting the number she gave to the brothers was a bit low. "Fine... Fine! Ah'll take it. Like ya said, it is free bits in the end." She thrust a hoof out, and soon shook with the brothers, sealing the bargain.

Moon Dancer poked her head back out from the cider maker, looking pleased. "Excellent! I'm so glad we could reach an amicable business arrangement."

She levitated out an armful of loose parts and neatly arranged tools. "Now then, I believe I've gleaned about all I can from this initial overview. But with your permission, I'd love to conduct some experiments to see about modifying functionality."

Her eyes shone eagerly behind her glasses. "I have a few theories about tapping into the spell matrix to broaden utility. Primarily looking at materia reconfiguration on a molecular level..."

She trailed off at the brothers' glazed stares. "That is...I want to see if we can get it to alter objects themselves just like it alters apples into cider!" she amended, indicating the scattered duplicate bolts.

Flim and Flam exchanged an intrigued look and huddled together, whispering. While revolutionary, the idea of this mare tinkering with their machine made them slightly nervous. Still, the profit potential...

They turned back with matching eager grins. "Capital idea!" crowed Flim. "By all means, experiment away!"

"Just uh, keep us posted," Flam added with a weak chuckle. "And try not to completely dismantle our life's work okay?"

Applejack just rolled her eyes skyward and took another long pull of cider. Clearly these two greenhorn businessponies were about to get schooled by a real innovator.

"I'll leave y'all to it then." She tipped her hat at Moon Dancer. "Holler if ya need anythin'. Gonna go rustle up some grub." Applejack ambled off, already looking forward to seeing what brainy new gizmos her honorary sister devised next.

Rainbow Dash landed suddenly. "So, does this mean you're doing cider day more often now?" She tapped the funny machine that held that promise. "I call dibs on the next one!"

Author's Note:

I feel like we could end this episode here? What do you think?

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Comments

[Arkonfleight]

I remember a side essay about supervillain gadgeteers not being allowed to do that very thing, because of the interesting ripple effects.
Like, the Green Goblin makes a man-portable flying device capable of outrunning cars and maneuverable enough to keep up with Spiderman... and he never loses one where someone can reverse engineer it? Osborne Corporation never tries to adapt the technology to something more profitable? It's too cursed by association to ever get off the ground? I mean, sure, it's comics, and a setting that lets inventions revolutionise it soon stops looking like the original setting (which is honestly usually more interesting).

That was a longwinded meander to "The next Flim and Flam episode better have a ponified Ned Ludd."

[TheGJ90]

Uh oh, this could lead to the Flim-Flam Bros taking advantage of Moon's smarts and limited social cue detection skills for their own benefit! Applejack better keep a really close eye on them.

[Booster Spice]

"Why shouldn't I?" came Moon Dancer's voice, slightly muffled. She wriggled back into view to flash the brothers an earnest smile. "You've created a spell matrix here that disrupts molecular cohesion. Just think of the applications!"

Uhoh.

Her eyes shone eagerly behind her glasses. "I have a few theories about tapping into the spell matrix to broaden utility. Primarily looking at materia reconfiguration on a molecular level..."

Oh poodles.

Moon Dancer just had the idea to make a cross between a Potterverse Transfiguration machine and a Star Trek Replicator. Using crystals that Pinkie might be able to supply or even create.

Button Mash would end making Sweetibot more T1000 than Robocop.

[howard035]

Seems like Applejack better find some way to keep at least one of the Flimflam Brothers tied firmly to the Apple family...