The Elements of Absolution

by leeroy_gIBZ

All those things that you desire

I woke up, and I was in bed. To make matters better, my headache was finally gone. The room was cool, and I don’t know how long I spent just lying there resting, curled in soft satin sheets and watching the Sun through the stained-glass window bathe everything in a soft red hue.

Eventually, I grew thirsty after spending a few hours tracing the intricate patterns on the ceiling. Sitting up, I saw a jug of water sitting on an ornate nightstand beside my bed. I poured myself a glass. It was ice cold spring water, still slightly fizzing like a hummingbird’s wings.

After two glasses, I climbed out of bed and walked over to the mirror. Looking myself down from head to hoof, I found that never looked better. Hey, I never felt better either. Not a single hair was out of place and my coat has a new, glossy golden shine to it. A pair of wings lay perfectly plumed at my sides, their feathers glinting in the crimson light. My eyes sparkled with a new intensity and I felt infinitely relaxed.

I would have spent days reveling there if something hadn’t caught my eye. A tiara, built from intricate silver filigree and balanced gently atop my mane. In its center was a beautiful sapphire, carved into the shape of a star. I took it in my hooves and examined it further. It was nearly weightless but, at the same time, it held a certain weight to it, more moral than physical. This was an epic crown.

The last day’s events came flashing back to me. Daybreaker appearing. Venturing into the Everfree Forest. Slaying a Jabberwocky. Overcoming my own insecurities in the giggling face of evil. Outwitting a real, live Siren and battling an army of ants over a ravine. And then I remembered it. We’d lost.

I’d got right past that door, blasting it open and somehow ascending to godhood in the process, only for Daybreaker to appear and for Sunny to betray us. She burnt me to ash while the pair of them laughed. At me. At Sunset Shimmer, former personal student to Luna herself and currently… currently, what was I? Aren’t I dead?

That, that really explains everything then. The cool room, the relaxation, the actually-decent haircut, everything. I died. And this is Heaven.

“Not exactly, dearie.” Sunny Flare said, entering the bedroom.

“Of course, this isn’t Heaven. You’re here. This is obviously Tartarus.”

Sunny sighed, frowning with what almost looked like regret. “I’m sorry. But I didn’t have a choice.”

“To do what, stab me in the back? You utter cunt! We were so close and ruined it all!” I shouted, any feeling of relaxation long gone. I was itching to test out what these new powers could do anyway.

“Stop! Don’t hurt me.”

Against my better judgment, the magic seeped out of my grasp just like it had in the library. Again, fucking thwarted. I just can’t win, can I?

“Fine. It isn’t like a have a choice anyway. So what, have you come here to gloat?”

“Oh, no, not at all.” Sunny said, taking a seat at the foot of the bed, “Come, sit down.”

“Like fuck I will. I’m standing and you’re not laying a single hoof on me. You had your chance with me and you blew it. Besides, I didn’t take you for a rapist.”

She had the audacity to gasp, “Sunset! I would never! No, just let me explain, please.”

“Speak.”

“Alright then, well, to be perfectly honest with you, we never actually that close to victory.”

“Yeah, obviously. There are six Elements, and correct me if I’m wrong but there only five ponies actually willing to use them.”

“You see, that’s the problem. The Elements of Harmony aren’t even real.”

“Bullshit. I saw them with my own eyes.”

“No, what you saw was something completely different. Something that can defeat Daybreaker.”

“And where does fucking me overcome into this? Before or after you just decided to give up?”

“I’m getting to that, dearie. Really, you should sit down, you look rather tired.”

“I look great and you know it. Maybe you’re projecting, Sunny?” I said, taking another look at the mare in front of me. Lack of sleep ringed her eyes and her coat had lost quite a bit of its former gloss. Her mane and tail were ruffled with split ends and her breath smelled like insomnia. One of her ears was wrapped in a bloodied bandage. She looked like cold shit warmed up. Good.

“No, I… yes, I am tired. I’ve spent the last week doing research.”

“What week? I’ve been out a day at most.”

“Now, dearie, you really haven’t. It took you three days before even looked like a real pony again after what Daybreaker did to you. It took another two before you started breathing again.”

“You’re telling me I came back to life?” I said, deciding to take a seat before I fainted.

“Exactly, Sunset. You are, after all, an alicorn.”

“I got the message. But skip to the part where your research actually yields something meaningful.”
“Well, back when you, me and Sour Sweet were exploring the library here-”

“Here? You mean we’re still in the Everfree? In the Castle of the Two Sisters, right under Daybreaker’s nose?”

She nodded, “Yes, anyway, I had a quick glance at a book Sour gave me. It was titled The Elements of Discord.”
“Good for you. Remind why this matters?”

“It matters because everything in this castle is at least a thousand years old. Which means that it was written before Luna had a chance to put forth her propaganda.”

“Okay, you’ve lost me. What propaganda? We’re the good guys, remember? Well, not you specifically but ponykind as whole is. We’re the ones who fight off the psychotic Griffon invaders, barter peace treaties with the Buffalo and pacified the Yaks. Fuck, I was even there for the last one.”

Sunny raised an eyebrow, “That means that the propaganda is working, dearie. Tell me, do you really think all that happened because we’re somehow morally better than everything else or because our leader literally controlled the Sun, Moon, and stars?”

Admittedly, she had a point.

“Yeah, so? Even if you are right about that, are you telling me that there’s a centuries-long conspiracy to retell a foal’s story?”

“I am. Look at this.” Sunny said, giving me the book.

I scanned it. Alicorn magic was pretty useful there because I actually remembered what I had read for once. Long story short, the book claimed that Luna sought of some kind of chaos demon for access to the Elements of Harmony, sorry, the Elements of Discord, and she used them to banish her evil sister. Waffles were not mentioned.

“Okay, let’s say I believe you and Luna really did try to lie about how she got rid of Daybreaker the first time around. Then what?”

“Well, then she started telling everypony that she had done it with the Power of Friendship, in order to start the fledgling nation down a hopefully good and wholesome path. After all, if she had admitted that she used some serious dark magic to banish her sister, ponies would be rioting in the streets. She’d be seen a new tyrant, another Queen Cadence if you will.”

I was familiar enough with the legends of the Love Queen of the Crystal Empire to know that she had been bad news while she was around. On an unrelated note, that also my favorite of Trixie’s performances, mostly because of the pole dancing involved.

“Again, where is this going?” I asked.

“It means that all we have to do is correctly assign the Elements of Discord to each pony and we should be able to slay Daybreaker.”

“Alright, Sugarcoat and the idiot brigade is still around then. What a nice surprise. But why do you even care, you won, didn’t you?”

“Truth be told, I really didn’t. You see, I think our new Princess is actually insane enough to follow through with her threat.”
“Remind what that is again, I had a pretty rough last couple of days.”

“She threatened to destroy the world unless we all swore fealty to her.”

“And how is that working out?”

“She is currently fighting seven major rebellions and an invasion, courtesy of the Griffons.”

“Good.”

“No, that’s the opposite of good, Sunset. It means that she’s distracted.”

“Again, I assumed that we a prerequisite to successfully banishing her.”

“Yes, it is, but it also means that the Sun will smash into the world in about a month’s time give or take because the only pony who can stop that is currently bathing in the blood of her enemies.”

“Oh, well that sucks. Maybe you should have figured that out before stabbing me in the back.”

“Again, Sunset, I’m terribly sorry. I honestly regret having to do that to you.”

“Again, I don’t give a shit. What she even promise you? Was it money, or fame, or just a really good stack of pancakes?”
Sunny cringed, looking away, out the window.

“Well?”

“She… she promised me, well, how do I say this in a way that doesn’t make me look like a madpony?”
“Chances are, if you’re worried you’ll look insane, you already do. Just spit it out.”

“She promised me you.”

“I’m sorry, what?!”

“Well, there is the issue. Truth be told, I’m not exactly not a filly-fooler.”

“Cool. You sucked at hiding it anyway. If you wanted to, all you needed to do was ask. You didn’t need to destroy the world to get laid.”

“Well, I was just so worried that you’d judge me for it, or something. I mean, I didn’t know you were, and even after you implied it, I didn’t really click. I was scared that you’d run away from Ponyville after your work was complete, and we’d never see each other again.”

“Yeah, that was basically my plan. Full offense because you frankly deserve it, you’re like a soft six at best by Canterlot standards. I can and I do get better on regular basis.”

“That’s why I did it. Do you remember our talk out on the bridge, just after we’d met Pizzicato?”

“Vaguely. You were spazzing out, I remember.”

“Yes, I had a vision.”

“You know, I became less attracted to you by the second. Hurry up and get to the point.”

“Fine. I owe you that much. Daybreaker basically offered me anything I wanted in exchange for betraying you all once we’d found the Elements of Discord. That was, by the way, what she referred to them as, which gave me the idea about all of this in the first place.”

“So this was all part of your plan then? You didn’t really want me as what, a sex slave? You just thought that it’d be a really good idea to save the world by trying to kill me?”

“Uh, yes, definitely. Let’s go with that.”

“Just for the record, go fuck yourself.”

“I know, I know and I deserve it.”

“I mean, I would but that’s probably only because Daybreaker put some kind of spell on me that makes it impossible to refuse your orders.”

Still looking away, Sunny nodded. “You’re right, again. But I knew that to really use the Elements, the tests had to be sincere. That was something that both books agreed on.”

“What tests? What do you mean?”

Sunny poured herself a glass of water before continuing. When she sat down, she did so next to me. I stood up.
“Basically, everything we had encountered leading up to the Vault of the Elements was a test of some attribute. Not, as would think, the Elements of Harmony. None of us were assigned any sort of positive role.”

“Makes a surprising amount of sense, so far. Well, it would if this wasn’t a dangerous forest filled with murderous monsters that would have tried to kill us anyway.”

“Think about it, Sunset. Our encounter with the Jabberwocky.”

“I have. It was exhilarating until Indigo decided to start mutilating the thing.”

“Indeed. And what is the opposite of Kindness.”

“Cruelty. Obviously.”

“And another one. What about Pizzicato? Lemon managed to trick her into helping us across the canyon. Does that speak of Honesty to you, or of Deceit?”

“Actually, Sugarcoat would have been the Element of Honesty. She’s the most honest pony I ever met and, for the record, a way nicer and more attractive pony than could ever be.”

“You don’t have to rub it in. I’m sorry. But she’s only one out of five. What about Sour? What Element can you assign her.”
“Beats me.” I shrugged, “She's a massive bitch.”

“Exactly my point. She’s Greed. It all fits, doesn’t it? Sour Sweet is Greed, Lemon Zest is Deceit, and Indigo Zap is Cruelty. And Sugarcoat is actually Misanthropy, by the way, not Honesty.”

Four for five, if she isn’t lying.

“Alright. What are you?”

She pointed to herself, “Why, I’m Treason, of course.”

Smart mare. Absolute prick, but intelligent.

“Sure. Let’s say that I believe you. What then, do we just go to the dungeons and free the others, then blast Daybreaker’s ass back into the Sun?”

“More or less. But they didn’t listen to me.” Sunny sighed.

“I cannot imagine why they didn’t.”

“But I hoped you would. You did, last time.”

“You mean your inane list of questions about Canterlot? I only listened because I thought I could get sex and booze out that. And I’m one for two at this point.”

She smiled coyly, reaching out a hoof. “We still have time to change that.”

“I’d rather be burnt alive again than touch you right about now.”

She withdrew her front leg. “Of course. Of course, you would rather do that. But, let’s go get the others, alright?”
“Give me an hour to think about it. I’m tired of talking to you.”

“Very well, please make the right choice,” Sunny said, getting up and starting for the door.
“One last thing. What’s my Element then?” I asked.

“Magic. Our little argument in the library should've told you that much.” She said, shutting the door behind her.

Comments

[FanOfMostEverything]

Yeaaaah, this could've been set up better. Some of it, like the inverted trials and Sunny's command spell, you pulled off well. Other bits come out of left field, like the propaganda and Equestria's international relations. And while Sunny would hardly make for a good traitor if we could see it coming, the lengths she went to rather than just openly talking to Sunset are Starlight Glimmer-tier back-asswards thinking. It's kind of understandable, but still pretty darn ridiculous... though insecurity is rarely, if ever logical.

Also, didn't all the crops in the world die several days ago at this point? And that's putting aside icecap flooding. As Sunny noted, the approaching sun never stopped being a thing.

[Ri2]

...the hell? Where did all this come from? It’s all out of nowhere

And fuck Sunny. This was unforgivable