Derpy and I

by Stormbringer

CHAPTER SIX: Joy

Twilight had the good fortune of not having any classes the next day. She and Muffins arrived at the courthouse early to get the marriage license in preparation for the wedding. They requested that a Justice of the Peace be available at noon.
Now there was an hour before Twilight’s parents and AJ were going to be there so they went to a little café in the building and drank some coffee while they waited.
The two were just talking and holding hands when a strange look came over Muffins face.

“Oh crap!” said Muffins.
“What, honey?” asked Twilight.

Muffins pointed out a window at the parking lot. There was a familiar and unwelcomed car.

“Shooting Star!” said Twilight. “The jerk must be following us. Doesn’t he have anything better to do? What’s his deal anyway? Is he so stupid that he’d think I’d just give up the love of my life to some ass-bite because he thinks he can claim a person (as barbaric as that is) and just do what he wants?”

Muffins just shrugged her shoulders.

As AJ’s pickup pulled into the parking lot. She saw Shooting Star’s car so she parked as far from him as she could. But she’d been spotted.

Applejack and the person with her were trying to hurry to the doors. But Shooting managed to get in front of the two.

“Applejack, stop,” called out Shooting Star blocking the way.

Applejack and the other woman grudgingly stopped.

“Applejack,” said Shooting Star, “can we talk?”
“Ah ain’t got nothin’ to say to ya. Ya slimy worm!” Said AJ as she tried to walk around the jerk.

Shooting reached out and grabbed AJ’s arm to stop her. But the woman with AJ swatted his arm extremely hard.
Harder than he expected.

“Hands off her, clown. Didn’t she just say she didn’t have anything to say to you buster!” said the woman in uniform.
“This is between Applejack and me,” said Shooting, rubbing his arm where he was hit. “It isn’t any of your business.”
“Well, I’m making it my business!”
“Listen here bitch,” said Shooting Star trying to be intimidating, as he out reached to push the woman away.

But like lightning and with military precision, the woman grabbed his wrist, spun and twisted his arm around and up his back, none to gently.

Shooting wasn’t ready for how much it hurt.

“That’s Captain Bitch to you, asshole,” said the woman in uniform with the rainbow hair. “Try to touch me or my girlfriend again and I’ll twist your frickin’ arm off and beat you to death with the bloody end!

Capeesh!”

Shooting nodded his head vigorously. Then the unknown woman released Shooting’s arm. Shooting was believing that this strange woman could do just what she’d threatened.

“Come on Rainbow Dash,” said AJ taking Rainbow’s arm. Then sneering at the jerk. “Looks like ya lost out to a woman again, needle-dick.”

AJ turned and kissed Rainbow a more than friendly kiss. The two just walked away leaving Shooting Star slack jawed and confused. Especially overhearing the Rainbow one say to AJ:

“Needle-dick, that’s a good one, lover-girl.”

Inside, Twilight and Muffins found AJ. Twilight was shocked, but happy to see Rainbow Dash with her.
Plus the two were holding hands.

“AJ! Rainbow Dash!” said Twilight as she and Muffins rushed to the friends.

They hugged in a group hug.

“Rainbow Dash!” said Twilight, “I’m so glad you could be here!”
“Twilight,” said Rainbow, “you couldn’t believe how happy I was when AJ told me about this.”
“But we only told AJ last night,” said Twilight.
“Ya know when Muffins was askin’ if’n ya caught me in the middle of someone? Ah was,” said AJ blushing. She turned and gave Rainbow a passionate kiss. “We’ve been seeing each other fer a spell now. After Ah saw ya and Muffins so happy. Ah thought; ‘What the hell!’
Ah called Rainbow that next day. Ah told her that Ah really did have feelin’s fer her since high school but were ’fraid to let anyone know. She’s never tried to hide the fact that she liked girls but I was skittish. She’s helped me through all that.
She’s been able to get away from the Air Force base occasionally. And well, one thing’s led to ’nother.”

AJ turned and kissed Rainbow again.

“And Muffins,” said Rainbow, “I’m so happy for you as well. Sorry if I was ever rude in the past.
But I’m glad that Twilight is making an honest woman of you. Didn’t you tell Twilight to use protection?”
They all laughed as Muffins hugged Rainbow, who was surprised but happy.
“It’s in the past,” said Muffins, “I’m just glad you’re here now.”

The reunion was broken up by Twilight Velvet sticking her head out of a courtroom door and urging them to come in, all was ready.

They all went in and stood before the JOP. Twilight had noticed there was an attractive woman she didn’t recognize, sitting silent at the back of the courtroom.

Twilight and Muffins stood before the official. Rainbow and AJ stood on either side of the couple as witnesses and attendants. Twilight Velvet had given the couple some wedding rings and she produced a small bouquet of flowers for Muffins. Velvet and Night sat in the first bench behind them. Tears of joy in both parents eyes.

It didn’t take very long and the JOP was about to pronounce the couple wed when someone came crashing through the door.

“Stop!” shouted Shooting Star, who’d been listening at the door. “This wedding can’t go on. Muffins is married to me!”

The Justice looked at Muffins.

“Is that true, Miss?”
“No It isn’t!” exclaimed Muffins.
“She’s carrying my child,” said Shooting, “so that means she’d mine!”
“Ah’m carrying yer child and Ah ain’t yers either!” said AJ. “besides, yer already married.”
“You think I care,” laughed Shooting Star. “I’m only married to Muffy because her family has money. As soon as her folks kick it, I’m taking the money and leaving.”
“I think that’s something Muffy should hear,” said Twilight.
“And who’s gonna tell her?” he laughed. “You? Applejack? She’ll never believe you.”
“What if’n yer the one to tell her?” said AJ.
“Like I’d do that!”

A voice came from the back of the courtroom.

“You just did,” said Muffy Star.
“Muffy! Darling! I can explain!”
“Why is it when they’re caught red handed,” said Muffy with disgust, “they always claim; ‘I can explain,’ like we’re stupid.
Well I was stupid, but I can fix it. My parents have always told me that they knew a good divorce lawyer. I think I need to take them up on that.
Thanks Applejack.”

AJ just nodded. Muffy turned and left the room.

Shooting Star was gobsmacked. He looked around him panicked and then ran out after Muffy.

“You’ll all pay for this!” he called out as he headed out the door.
“Do you take checks?” said Twilight.
“Good one Twi,” said Rainbow giggling.

At that point, everyone looked to the front.
“I believe you were about to say something,” said Muffins.
The JOP smiled.
“I now pronounce you wed. You may kiss your bride.”
Twilight and Muffins kissed deeply.
“May I be the first to introduce, Mrs. Twilight and Mrs. Muffins Sparkle.”

Everyone applauded, AJ and Rainbow looked at each other and kissed.

Then in place of a bouquet toss, Muffins handed the flowers to AJ and motioned to Rainbow. Applejack got the idea.

“Hey Rainbow,” said Twilight with a wink and a snicker, “did you hear the one about the guy that was so lazy, he married a pregnant woman?”

Applejack whispered something to Rainbow.

“Can y’all stay here for a few minutes? Ya too, yer honor. Rainbow and Ah’ll be right back.”

It was about half an hour later and the JOP Introduced Mrs. Rainbow and Mrs. Applejack Dash as well.