I Think It's Called Ponytown

by Lasairfion

You buy One you get One Free

Scarcity looked completely confused. "Twilight, dear", she started, "I think that perhaps you..."
"Ha!" exclaimed Rainbow. "I told you something was going on with the colouring. Also who's Rarity?"

Twilight looked at Rainbow. "And why are your colours reversed, Rainbow?" she said. "You're supposed to be blue."
"Blue?" said Rainbow. "No awesome Rainbows anywhere?"
"Your mane should be Rainbow coloured, Rainbow", said Twilight.
"I knew it!" crowed Rainbow. "Still an awesome rainbow Rainbow! I told you something was weird, Scarcity."
"Scarcity?" said Twilight. "Who's Scarcity?"

Rainbow groaned. She looked around the room for the small dragon, who was currently nowhere to be seen. "Poiiiiint!" she yelled. "C'mere Point!" A red and gold blur shot into the room, his little legs scrabbling for purchase on the slippy floors.

"Is Twilight okay? Does she need anything? Is the world going to end?" he said all panicky like, clutching a fresh glass of water and headache tablets.

"What's the point?" grizzled Twilight feeling like her sanity was slipping. "Spike? Where are you Spike?"

Point rounded the edge of a sofa and faced Twilight, who screamed and tried to scramble backwards. Luckily her legs were still tangled up in the rugs so she didn't make any significant progress. Point screamed and dropped the glass of water, which shattered on the needlessly hard crystal floor. Scarcity screamed... because drama.

"Who are you?" said Twilight.

Four pie charts, three Venn diagrams and a blast on the brain scanning machine later, the four friends had come to some startling conclusions. This didn't just involve colour swaps and building faults. This went to the very heart of pony identity. What were their cutie marks? What were their names? Who were they really? Nothing was safe. The question now then was 'How far up did this go?' It was time to involve the princesses.

"Spike! Take a letter!" ordered Twilight gesticulating at the dragon. "Er... I mean Point. Yes. Right."

Blueblood sat on the throne in court. Technically it was one of several thrones because everyone, of course, was strictly equal. But this was the one that the Party Leader sat in and which people petitioned. It had turned out to be a really long and boring day.

Some of the ponies had even come to petition that the changelings were taking over again. Blueblood had, of course, had the guard run the requisite magical checks over the accused but to no discernable outcome. If ponies suddenly wanted to dye themselves pink, that was quite within their own purview, even if it seemed to distress other members of their family. Besides, if it had've been changelings then that would make them very stupid ones to all change the colour of the target's coat.

He briefly considered ordering some of that posh Germane 'Dummkopf' brand dye, but decided against it. No matter how 'with the masses' he liked to be, pink and yellow would make for a terrible combination. He turned to look at the Official Ruling Party Daylight Co-ordinator. Her hair seemed to be strobing again and was giving him a mild headache every time he looked at her. He swore she did it on purpose.

Suddenly a burst of green fire erupted in-front of her. Two queuing petitioners screamed 'changelings' and fainted, but it was simply a dragon-mail letter arriving. The scroll fell to the floor. Blueblood looked a little perplexed. "Would you happen to know", he said, "why ponies have suddenly decided to send you post?" Celestia shrugged.

Her horn lit and the scroll floated up before the both of them. Unfurling it she quickly scanned the contents. 'Dear Princess Celestia' it started, waffling for 18 paragraphs of magi-science speak before making an important point about 'The Possible End of the World as We Know It' in the last sentence. Blueblood guffawed at the archaic use of imperial addresses. These rural types were so backwards.

Still, a potential threat to the Ponies' Constitutional Democratic Liberal Free Republic of Equestria should always be taken seriously, and since it was some backwater little town of... Ponytown, he noted, then it didn't make a whole lot of sense to send the Great and Glorious but Still Very Equal Leader for what was likely to be a minor issue. Glancing at the still strobing mane of his fellow Party Member he came to the swift conclusion that equality being what it was, it was only fair that Celestia take the glory of this particular visit.

He thought she might be unamused, but it was very hard to ever tell what she was really thinking.

Celestia strolled through the Former Imperial Palace, along the Hall of Depressing Statues and down through the Green with Red Accents Salon. Stopping only briefly at the kitchens to select an Official Party Member Allowable Travelling Snack she made her way out into the landing yard at the rear, and selected two poster-colt officers as her chariot team. It was always important to show the masses what excellent examples of hard work, discipline and strict obedience to the Party line looked like. These two, from the looks of their bulging muscles, huge wing length and tight barrels were obviously very strictly obedient.

The unadorned and very utilitarian looking grey metal chariot, pulled by the two officers of the Ponies' Former Imperial Confederate Army, dropped out of the skies over Ponytown coming to a rest just outside the Ostentatious Sparkle Castle.

Celestia stepped out of the vehicle, briefly halting as she tried to work out anywhere to put her hooves that wasn't essentially hard-packed dirt. She sighed. The Ponies' Technical Infrastructure Upgrade Team obviously hadn't made it out here yet. Ponytown probably wasn't very high on the priority list. Main exports were... fruit, she thought, which would likely be taken directly out on a spur from the main railway line.

She briefly wondered why, then, was there a major Regional Headquarters Hub building here? Still, the brief handed to her on her way out of the Palace suggested that Regional Director Twilight Sparkle had a firm grasp of countryside economics and a flair for major incident control, which being so close to the Everfree Forest was likely important. Still, if a regional director with such talents needed assistance for something so apparently important then it was best if an Official Party Member lend their support and influence to ensure the stability and continuity of the region's affairs.

Celestia knocked on the large doors of the castle, and wondered why the air smelled faintly of burnt socks. A small purple alicorn clutching a scroll quickly opened the door, looked up at the tall pink alicorn, and promptly fainted.

---

Mr Bing looked across at Mr Liu. "You're positive this one is pink too, yes?" Mr Liu nodded. He had definitely seen Western Google Search Engine image results for this one being pink.

Comments

[Mr cold ghost]

Ha ha ha! Just a question are we going to see applejack and fluttershy too? Just wondering. Thanks for the update!

[Irrespective]

8675095
Yeah, spaces seem to work the best for some odd reason.

But now I really want a knock-off Rainbow Dash, just for the joy of the color swap.

[Georg]

8675096 You mean Glorious Harvester of Tree Fruits and Flapping Gentle Speaker?

[Voldine]

Oh good lord, Pinklestia the Vomitous!

[Zaten the Changeling]

"What's the point?" grizzled Twilight feeling like her sanity was slipping. "Spike? Where are you Spike?"

Oh no, not the only sane one here! DONT LET YOUR SANITY DIE YET!

[Zaten the Changeling]

He briefly considered ordering some of that posh Germane 'Dummkopf' brand dye, but decided against it. No matter how 'with the masses' he liked to be, pink and yellow would make for a terrible combination. He turned to look at the Official Ruling Party Daylight Co-ordinator. Her hair seemed to be strobing again and was giving him a mild headache every time he looked at her. He swore she did it on purpose.

This is one of those moments where I am glad I know some German (Germane? idk which to use in this context).
Dummkopf means fool
Dumm means dumb
Kopf means head
So it appears that either the dye is made by a brand called 'Foolish Dyes', or the dye is made by a brand named 'Stupid Head' or 'Stupid Head Dyes'. Analysis complete.
WOOOOOOOOO

[Zaten the Changeling]

Mr Bing looked across at Mr Liu. "You're positive this one is pink too, yes?" Mr Liu nodded. He had definitely seen Western Google Search Engine image results for this one being pink.

I'm starting to wonder if he is actually using the Bing search engine instead of "Western Google Search Engine".
(cue bad punz sound effect)
Eh? Eh?

[Accurate Balance]

No, Twi, you got it all wrong.
This is a CK, not an XK.

[Zaten the Changeling]

8905560
6 years in post and i am only mildly embarrassed about this. still holds up logically. bing sucks as a search engine.