Life is Fun When You're Crazy

by Comrade Bagel Muffin

Barns and Bombs

Crazy Pyromaniac helped haul in another cart of apples into the Apple family's barn. It was the last part of his community service for blowing up half of the Ponyville market. He had been spending every day for the past two weeks helping every pony who'd lost a stall.

Much to his surprise, the ponies in this town weren't like the ponies in all the other towns that Crazy had visited. They were neither mad nor irate at him for blowing up the market. Many even thanked him for helping them rebuild their stalls. Strange or not, Crazy liked it.

Crazy really liked the Apple family since they'd been really nice to him in spite of the fact he'd blown up their stand. They let him take breaks and even gave him sweet tea. Crazy liked sweet things, like candy and ice cream, as well as applesauce. Crazy smiled as an ingenious idea came into his head. The Apple family seemed to really like applesauce and would probably like a lot of it to sell. As luck would have it, Crazy knew exactly how to make a lot of applesauce really fast.

It wouldn't be easy, Mr. Royal Guard pony had taken almost all his bombs away. It felt like a grounding, fortunately Crazy had five high yield explosives that they had let him keep. Maybe they thought they were fake? Crazy pulled the cart into the middle of the barn and grabbed his bag. He pulled out five little black balls with fuses coming out of one end. Crazy had made these bombs himself, designed to have plenty of bang but no flash, so they'd be perfect for this. He threw one of them into the cart with all the apples, and put the other four around it. This way when it went boom the other four would keep it contained with more booms. He heaped more apples into the cart and got the fuses ready. Oh, the Apples were going to be so happy.

***

Winged Shield walked down the small path that lead to the Apple Family homestead. It was his turn to pick up the little runt from his court ordered public service. He and Duty Bound both thought it best if they not let Loyal Heart watch the bomb happy colt. Especially after he tried to clean up the mess on his first day with dynamite, and the simple-minded guard was helping him set the fuses.

After that the two of them went through his things and took away all his explosives. By the time they were done, there wasn't so much as a speck of black powder. Applejack was at the front gate waiting for him. "Hello Applejack, I hope the little runt hasn't caused you too much trouble."

"None at Mr. Shield, he's been right helpful. In fact, he's almost done, he's just putting the last apples in the-." The ground underneath them shook a little as the boom sounded from the Apple Family barn. "-barn." Winged Shield's was eye twitched as a splotch of apple sauce hit him in the face.

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