Chapter 6: Well, Now I Just Have To Keep Them From Killing Eachother
(\PoV: Jonathan/)
"So a rogue, a paladin, a sorcerer and a dragon sit down for tea with a bat-pony..." Mystic groans and puts a hoof to her forehead just below her horn. I grin "Oh come now, I didn't even say the pun yet!" Not that there is one in the first place, but sillyness can help keep heads from rolling at inopportune times. For instance: the first gathering of The Party.
Nightshade snorts and rolls her eyes. "If there was supposed to be a pun after that, I'll eat my cloak. And I like this cloak"
Well then, don't I have the perfect job for little miss Ruins-The-Fun... "Alrighty then, you can go get the firewood."
She sputters before giving me a a peeved look. "And if I say no?"
"Oh, I don't know, maybe a TPK right outa the gate?!"
Probably, so let's try to avoid that. "Oh, then I suppose I'll go get it," Shade opens her mouth to speak again, "Which would leave a quite clearly annoyed paladin in close proximity to a being she hates, as well as her friend. With only an illusionist to keep one from killing the other two instead of the large creature with exceedingly tough scales. Do you see where I'm going with this?"
She closes her mouth before motioning to the woods. "Uh, yeah, on second thought, I'll go get that wood, eh?" She quickly shadowports out of the clearing to God-Probably-Knows-Where to get some wood. What? She's the rogue, of course I don't know where she went! Now Sol on the other hand... Yeaaah, that probably wasn't the best thing to say... She's practicaly fuming!
"Dost thou wish to imply that I hath no self-control?" She says through gritted teeth.
Let's see... Do the smart thing again and explain the answer in a slightly sarcastic tone, but also make complete, logical sense? Or do I do the stupid yet hilarious for the readers thing and just say yes? ...Oh hell with it! I fix my best deadpan face and look Sol in the eyes. "Yes."
She stares at me in shock for a moment. Then, she twitches. Then twitches again, this time slowly starting to get that 'I'm Pissed Off!' look that only an anime character could do better. I'm about to get hurt again, aren't I?
"Yeeeeeep!"
"Undoubtedly."
"...Sigh... And I was so looking forward to a relaxing tea..."
She comes in screaming with her warhammer out, it impacts before I have time to sit up and-hey, that didn't hurt that much. BINK! Not that, either. I look down and see Sol screaming her lungs out and continuing to hit me... BONK! To absolutely no effect.
"Oi, she 'its loik a grot!"
Yes, random Ork, yes she does. Oh! Idea! And it's going to be hilarious! I look over to the other two, who are sitting there with jaws meeting the floor. In a completely relaxed voice, I say, "Lovely weather this evening, isn't it?"
Of course, this causes Sol to redouble her efforts in trying to hurt me, (though at this point, I'm more worried that she's going to hurt her throat with all that screaming.) But she's not the one I'm paying attention to all that well now, is she? Anyhow, Moony, (not to be confused with the werewolf Marauder,) puts a hoof over her mouth. Too bad for her that a pony's eyes are so expressive, because I can see how she's just barely keeping in her laughter. As for Drop, well, I hope we're not about to experience an Alolan Ponyta, but I wouldn't bet on it. I mean, what else could a rapidly twitching eyebrow mean coupled with an almost-scowl. Whup, make that a complete gritting-her-teeth scowl now.
"How..." Mystic Drop grits out, "Can you... Keep... Making. My. Headache. WORSE?!" She practically explodes, but not literally. Sadly.
I shrug. "Because that's what people like me do to people who rely on inflexible logic? No offense."
Mystic glares at me for a moment, but then Moony finally starts laughing. Her laugh sounds like Chrysalis', actually, just less mean and rude and un-nice. Also with a higher pitch, but meh, details.
"As the most logical of the figments, I feel that I should alert you to your illogical categorization of important details about others."
Feh, whatever Ironheart. Noted and mostly disregarded. Drop turns to glare at Moony, before softening it and sighing. She turns back to me. "None taken, I guess. I mean," Drop gives a tired smile, "You got the kid to laugh, so I guess you're not so bad for a whatever-you-are. I mean, what are you anyway? I'm pretty sure that demons and mundane healing spells dont mix, and light doesn't hit you right to mean you're from this plane." Yeah, the demon-healing spell thing kinda-Wait, I'm sorry, light doesn't what?!
I take a good look at my claws, taking careful notice of... Wat. I actually look like a deathclaw from Fallout 4. Not just in basic shape, (No duh, Shamrock Hooves,) but I mean I actually look like one from the games. How the HELL didn't I notice that earlier-Wait... Demons, light not hitting them right? No, nonono those can't be-No, wait, opposites attract, of course that 'verse would find its way here... Well shit. Batten down the hatches, men! We may have a 40K-level problem here.
"...Shit. If those ones are the 'Lords of Entropy', then we've got our work cut out for us."
Maybe, but if they're weak to the Elements like I've theorized they might be-
"Stop. We lack any true evidence that they are behind this. Even then, we have no true combat experience. We got lucky that we were transformed into something that can take a hit ridiculously well instead of a pony. All the same, if it is them, exactly how could we fight them with a weakness that cripples us toward their entire realm of power?"
{Please note that at this point, John thought many swear words that certainly would not be appropriate to mention.}
"Oh look! Sol's stopped! I'm also totally not trying to get us off this depressing and grimdark train of thought!"
Hm? Oh yeah, you're right. Sol's panting and laying against the tree that I knocked over. I look over to her, and she glares back up at me. "Feeling a bit better now?" She stares at me in surprise, the glare getting lost in confusion. "Don't think I didn't notice how down you were getting back there with what I said earlier. That, with everything that happened in the clearing? You needed to let off some steam." Because that's totally what my plan was when I said-Oh heck with it, you lot behind the Fourth know I'm bullshitting. No need to extrapolate. (Yes, I know what the word means. No, you can't test me on the dictionary definition.)
Sol looks away for a moment, but looks back up at me. "Well... Huff... I thank thee... Hah... Then."
I nod and very carefully keep from grinning, instead gently sweeping my tail back and forth. "No problem, Sol. What are friends for, anyway?" I then carefully reach into the center of our little group and dig out a pit for the fire. Due to my massive claws, the proccess only takes a minute, even packing the dirt up around the edge of the small pit to make up for the lack of large rocks. Turns out that thumb-claw helps for digging, which is nice.
Blood Moon, who has calmed down, smiles. "That certainly helps, thank you, Dreadscale."
I nod to her. "You're welcome," I look around, but don't see anything nesccesary for tea, and look to Moon and Mystic. "I don't suppose either of you would have a kettle and tea leaves handy, would you?"
M&M, (did you really think I'd miss such an obvious accidental reference?) look at eachother before looking back at Sol and I. "You mean that you didn't have such supplies?" Moony says in a surprised tone.
At this I scratch the back of my head sheepishly. "Nope! I just wanted to keep everything from going wrong right out of the gate, hehe..."
Everyone, including Sol, stares at me a moment. Then the chuckles start, and everyone starts laughing. Slowly, yeah, but everyone's laughing like loons soon enough. And for your information, I'm proud to say that I was giving out a booming laugh as well!
Soon enough, Nightshade walks into the war-torn clearing with a bundle of sticks on her back to see all of us laughing uproarously. "...I missed something here, didn't I?"
Can he stay in DEATHCLAW form please?
8600528
Believe me, that's the plan. I made a major SNAFU with the Deus Ex Tree, as Lycanthromancer pointed out to me. He's staying a deathclaw, albeit with wings, but that's it. I mean, that's what the big [EDITED] sign on the previous chapters was all about.
8600550
AH I did not see that. Good to know.
8600557
Hey, no problem, God knows I've made similar mistakes.
8600573
Don't we all?
I am just imagining Celestia in full armor hitting someone with a giant squeaky hammer now and just can't stop laughing about that.
8600713
So to defeat that we will need to combined Master Chief with the Mysterious stranger or we can fix it like how I beat the large security bots. Hide in a building they can't fit in while shooting them with a mini-gun till they stop moving or explode.
8600753
Yes. This is very yes, and it gives me many ideas.
(Though, if I'm being honest, he's not going to get that in-story. Not in a thousand years! ...........)
Of course, he WILL be getting arms and armor, but that's much later.
8600763
I have many random ideas like the time me and another person filled another person comment section talking about a muffin and cupcake war that Discord could make with the Pink and Grey monsters attacking their soldiers. Along with the disappearing cake generals and the sighting a of new monster that is white with a rainbow trail.
8600782
That, is bloody beautiful. Now I actually want to see a fanfic where this happens.
8600795
I would try and do it as a one-chapter story but I just feel like I won't do the justice that this kind of story choose. Cause I want it to be a comedy/tragedy at the same time, I have a lot of ideas though my writing skills I feel like won't do the ideas as much create as I want them to have. I mean I have already started two stories though I have a tend to be easily distracted, my thought wonder away from me easy.
8600820
Honestly? The best thing I can recommend for honing your writing skills like that is actually writing them down and showing them to people you know before deciding if you want to post it. You won't find my first fanfiction anywhere on the internet because it's written down in a beaten-up journal that I've since used for writing down ideas in.
As for wandering thoughts, well, mine are pretty much the same. The best way I can describe my though proccess is like standing in the eye of a tornado, watching things fly all about until at some point random bits come together to make something beautiful, just to split apart as quickly as it came. I'm left trying desperately to follow them, only to be distracted by the next shiny thing moments later.
As for writing skills, I don't think any author who ever wrote thought their skill did the idea any credit until after people came to them praising it. I mean, until I let my family and my teacher see that first fanfiction, I thought I was a terrible writer! Turns out I'm not, but hey, that's how it goes right?
...Sorry if I'm waxing eloquent, it's something I do a bit too often.
TPK?
I don't know what's weird with the deathclaws lighting so this just confuses me.
8600550
I need to reread those chapters then.
Soldier: Merasmus! Get your ghostly ass out here!
8600956
Roleplay speak for Total Party Kill.
As for the lighting... Hmm, how to better describe it... Ah. He's got the texture and color style of a deathclaw from Fallout 4, but he's in MLP, and they have their natural textures. (Read as, they look like the cartoon.) In their eyes, (and his, actually,) light doesn't work right for him. I hope that helps.
8601391
Wait does that mean he seems more detailed and more bulgy than everything around him. Because if so it would be a great time to add a reference to the Jimmy Timmy Power hour, specifically I’m Talking about when timmy went to jimmy's world where he described the 3D animation as everything being “bulgy”.
8601469
It probably would be if I knew what you were talking about, sounds entertaining.
But yes, that's the gist of it. The world is still 3D, but yeah, he's got more detail to him than his surroundings.
8601503
you should really watch it it's on vidme.
8609129
Same company made it... And found that out in later chapter
This is awesome. Can't wait for more!
Also... My oc is Alicorn but can become any of the other species with one of the powers he has...
(Astral Spirit is his name and he is OP)
he is in my story...
I might not finish that story...
8610917
...Ok. I wanted all OC submissions to be in PM form, but oh well. If you have any more details than that you can give me, then please do so in a PM so that I can give your OC a chance at least.
After all, it's hard to work with just "Is an alicorn, is OP." (Though honestly, saying the OC is an alicorn automatically means OP in some way so...)
8611603
Well I'm just gonna copy and paste power list from my story...
Here's what he looks like cdn-img.fimfiction.net/story/toe7-1496952628-374991-full
8611612
...I'll admit, I'm impressed. Redundancy in super speed and Time Manipulation in case either is negated, complete transdimensional access to whatever he needs, he's a Jedi Sentinel with Finess, (a class of Jedi that used know-how and ranged weapons more often than their lightsaber, and a perk from Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II that allowed a Dex-based character to use their Dex stat for mele combat instead of their Strength stat,) and to top it all off he's a Trump-class Cape, (Capes are superhumans from the web serial Worm, and a Trump is a cape that is able to either copy or negate the powers of other capes. (Also, Worm was made before the whole Donald Trump thing happened, just so no one starts any political shrak.)) Oh, and he has a very warm bird, that too.
Honestly though? He's still not as bad as the aforementioned OC of Ridiculous Power, (who actually WILL be entering into the story because he actually knows subtlety.) I'm not going to give too much away here, but let's just say that Equestria's version of Skaven Clan Eshin isn't evil.
Anywho, I'll probably put him in, but not for a good while as it seems he'd be a bit too powerful for the current level.
Of course, when Ohh No You Don't invades, I'll let him have his fun. That sound alright to you?
8612417
Yep sounds great and I'm surprised at your knowledge of all these topics (I gave my OC all the powers I wish I have)
I'm actually going to get back to work on my story tomorrow so...
That 'very warm bird' is immortal as well so... Companions for eternity...
I'm asking you what the number 42 is the answer to
(hint: hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy)
8612731
Honestly, it's probably because I have a habit of looking at so many other stories and universes that I just go "OOOH, Shiny!" and dive right in. I don't always go all-in on things though, which is why you'll see that John doesn't have all of the knowledge he might need when Nope. Still not saying. come into town.
Ah, is that not one of life's greatest mysteries, the meaning of 42?
And if I may make a suggestion for your story based on your character, I would try and give him a villian or rival that is as strong or stronger than him. After all, being overpowered works so long as there are other overpowered creatures about.
8612747
It will be helpful for (ironically my OC's name is Cape from my yt channel Cape Industries) Him to show up when They-Who-Must-Not-be-Named showed up (and not Voldemort being mentioned) and be like here is what you need to know and 'Celly' (I kinda forgot her name) will be like "ooh books" and read Dem all
Also...
8612764
Helpful? Yep. Entertaining? Not as much as it could be. Actually, It Is They-Whom-Shall-Not-Be-Named would probably be a massive danger even to Cape with how The Nope works. Not to mention the fact that Solaria as it stands would be highly suspicious of an alicorn in that day and age just giving her books. Suffice to say that a horn and wings doesn't make you a benevolent god in the eyes of ponies yet.
All the same, when John and The Party learn of him they'll be trying to find him. (After all, one would not simply repell what is coming in the far future.)
8612786
Maybe they should have to go on quest to make sure they be worthy of these gifts... John would love the tech and solaria will love the KNOWLEDGE that he gives them(probably an op spell to make her Alicorn and move sun/gain power from said ball of gas in space) also
42!!!
"Remember. Reality is an Illusion, The universe is a hologram, by gold. BYE!!!"
If you got that reference you get internet muffin
8612809
Now you've got it. A test of sorts to make sure that the knowledge won't be abused, that would work. As for what you're suggesting as far as the alicornification, the rest of the party will have hit the Alicorn point before the Invasion, it would be uneccesary. I have a... Brighter, idea in mind.
Unfortunately, I'm going to have to turn down the muffin, as I do not recognize that quote.
8612829
The quote Is from Bill Cipher on Gravity Falls
And just how bright is your idea on a scale of One (Quite dim) to Ten (SUPERNOVA)
For their Ascension to godhood of the PC Master race...
Ahem... sorry the memes keep slipping
As for their Ascension... Any hints?
8613046
The most I'll say is that each of them will have a trial related to the Elements.
As for where my idea would be on your scale, I haven't a ghost of a clue.
861369
And please don't make the trial like in the first episode.
Seen those clones too many times
So you are at around 5 on that scale
8614113
No worries. This is set long before the main show, back when all those big bads from the show are roaming with little to no resistance. The trials will be more than the show's.
Depends on if I'm just being far to subtle with the references or not.
8614441
This story dead er somethin? Seriously, I've been waitin.