How to train your villains

by Kewiei777

Chapter 3 A lesson to know yourself

“Let’s sum this up, he hath no idea what he is, values, goals, views of the world. He can talk, communicate, knowing the basic of logic and some of the words’ meaning but taking a total damage of the values behind the words. How to teach him? Where to start?” Nightmare moon murmured to herself, thinking about how to train her student into her faithful follower.

“When should the lesson start? Err… your highness” Elaphos bluntly asks.

“Quiet, we are thinking about thy syllabus.”

“Isn’t that should be done long before the lessons start?”

“Shut up! Principle one: Follow thy Queen’s order. Now do not bother me.”

“Why should I follow the principles? And you are my queen. This principle one obviously can’t apply to you, then what principles should you follow?”

“Fine, we will design thy syllabus later. Now, for thy first question: When we are thinking about something, we always have preconditions, spoken or hidden. Some of the preconditions can be proved using other preconditions. But some of these preconditions cannot be backtracked and it is too obvious to prove. That’s called principle. Now this principle one is especially designed for thee and thy ignorance. It allow thee to solve any question thou face, precisely and fast.”

“I can’t quite follow, but this sounds persuading. I’ll keep principle one in mind.” Elaphos replies.

“As for thy second question. According to principle one. We say this is none of thy concern.”

“Ok, thank you, your highness.” Elaphos says, seems to accept the principle.

“And principle two: Always for thy queen’s safety and happiness.” Nightmare moon states. “This principle…”

“Questions.” Elaphos interrupts.

“Say.”

“Sometimes principles contradict to one another. When one is against two, which principle should I follow?”

“We really should teach thou manners about not to interrupt thy queen’s speaking, Maybe later.” Nightmare moon says impatiently. “Here come the principle three: when one and two contradict, fellow principle two. In case Celestia mess with my mind using sister this or sister that. It will be surprising for her to find we have a reminder.”

“Why should I follow manners which is other than principles? And who is this Celestia? You keep on mentioning it.”

“Manners is the way ponies agreed to get along with each other containing… Never mind, thou can take it as my order. And Celestia is our enemy need to be dethrone. She is our sister so thou cannot call her ‘this Celestia’ or ‘it’ her.”

“Why do…”

“Ke en!” Nightmare moon coughs to interrupt Elaphos. “Orders!”

“Sorry, my queen. I’m just not familiar with this thinking pattern. I am working on it. I won’t let you down.”

“Oh, I am pleased. Thank Faust for one’s thirst for knowledge when he knows nothing.” Nightmare moon is delighted by the outcome of her effort before something comes to her mind. “These principles seems to have some logical loophole in them…”

“What?” Elaphos squeaks, shocked to hear the words.

“What we just say is wrong, forget the word. That is an order.” Nightmare moon urges.

“Ok.”

‘By Faust’s name, damn this talking to ourselves habit.’ Nightmare moon struggles to keep the words in the mouth. ‘We can no longer bear it. We need a change.’

“Ok, we will cast a spell that embody thee with some dust and mist as a phantom thing that can allow thou to walk and interact with light-weight objects. Thou are still in our head so it is just kind of ‘remote-control’. Thou can save the question to the future, by the way. We have enough of this ‘Talking to myself’.” The queen of the night abruptly blurts out angrily.

“Err… Ok, I’ll follow your order and seems like you would be happy if I do so, no contradictory.”

“Enn… side-effect.” Nightmare moon says. “Just don’t speak thy thought out, ok? It sounds wired. Now shut up and this will be our last word talking to thee when thou are not materialized in front of us.”

Nightmare moon starts casting the spell. She is happy that this nightmare ends...well...partly. Breeze puffs around the room and dust on the ground gathers and forms an outline of a… “A ball, what’s the hay? This spell was supposed to represent the self-cognition of the objective. Thou think thee are a ball?”

“Wait, ball means origin and null, which means the incipient self-cognition status. This happens to those newborns who do not aware themselves, not even subconsciously. Thou really dost not know what thou were, do thou? Benefit for me, we will help thee. Listen. Thou are a pony, like us, an alicorn to be specific.”

The ball of dust and mist gradually takes the form of a male alicorn under the manipulation of the azure magic and its legs start to move inharmoniously, indicating the rookie owner of the phantom.

“Thou will shew in this form every times we call thee out. Later we will give thee the access to use the spell without our help. Thus thou will come out whenever thou want or we do.” Nightmare moon orders. “Now thou can ask.”

“And stop floating like that, try walking like us.” Nightmare moon adds and demonstrates how to walk. “No, no, not this floating walking. Fine, we have a long way to go.” She sighs.

Author's Note:

I don't feel good while reading this.