You put a finger to your chin, searching through your depraved mind for an answer. But before you find one, you are struck with a stirring in your loins. The primal want for a woman’s touch. Undignified, to be sure, but even a king has his needs; he must attend to those before he can do kingly things. The answer’s found you, it seems.
You recall the first of such thoughts towards womankind. Cersei was a beautiful woman – indeed, one of the most beautiful women in Westeros. You had imagined that she was even more beautiful in her youth, when she first married Robert. And she was the one who had nurtured you, comforted you in your times of need, and taught you the ways of the world. Indeed, you owe much of who you are to her. It seems only natural, then, that your first urges to mate would be directed to her. You wonder, for a brief moment, if she would have nurtured you in that way as well if you had expressed those urges to her.
But as Westeros is but a distant memory, Cersei included, it is only brief.
An urge for women, with no women to be found. Not even men who look like women. Just horses. Stallions and… mares. You let out a despondent sigh as you realize: from now on, you’ll have to be content to fuck a mare. Which mare? The one right in front of you would be the most logical choice.
It’s going to be quite the challenge. You have no access to women, but she has access to stallions. Charming a talking horse into letting a man inside her when she could easily have another talking horse instead. Quite the challenge, indeed. But with Robert’s charm, Cersei’s good looks, and a bottle of whiskey, how can you fail?
Starlight, at the very least, reminds you of Cersei.
“You know,” you say, “I don’t think I’ve gotten to know you well enough. How about a night out on the town? Just the two of us.”
Starlight giggles. “A king, asking me out on a date? I am flattered, Your Grace.”
Your mouth stretches to a grin. “As you should be. But you know...” Your grin shrinks away. “I know it isn’t very manly to ask the lady where she’d like to go, but…”
Starlight lets out a playful scoff. “It’s okay. I understand. Alien universe and all that. How about dinner and a movie?”
You cock an eyebrow. “Can you tell me what a movie is?”
“Hmm. Well, basically, you have this machine called a projector, which casts a beam of light onto a blank screen or canvas which puts an image on it. An image slide is put into it, then is projected onto this blank screen or canvas. Now, ‘movie’ is short for ‘motion picture’, which means the projector is flipping through many pictures in rapid succession – we’re talking fifteen, thirty every second – each one just ever so slightly different from the last. This gives it the illusion of motion, thus, motion picture. With me so far?”
You nod. I don’t care. Get to the point.
“Good. Now, alongside the motion picture is an audio track, which accompanies it through speakers placed on all sides of the theater. It has music, voice-acting, sound effects… pretty much every audio component that the filmmakers decide complements the motion picture, recorded and played back on a separate device. Both of those things together make up what we call a movie.”
You nod. “Oh. So, it’s like a stage play with moving pictures on a canvas instead of live actors.”
“Yeah, that about sums it up.”
“You could’ve just said that.”
She chuckles. “I know. But I like going on about these things. Anyway, are you interested? There’s one in particular I think you would like.”
“Very well.”
“Alright. Then let’s go. We don’t wanna be late.”
“Joffrey!”
You whip your gaze up to the open sky, in the direction of the shouting. Rocketing down at you from there is a cyan blur, trailing a shock of rainbow hair tossing in the wind. You clutch the handle of Widow’s Wail, ready to defend yourself. Yet, before the blur comes within the sword’s reach, a screen of bluish-green light flashes before your very eyes. The speeding blue slams into the screen with a pained grunt, then plummets down to the dirt road below. A cloud of dust rises on impact. As the dust settles and the screen dissipates, the blue pegasus bolts up from off the ground. You remember this one. Rainbow Dash. Once she’s up on her hooves, she glares at Starlight with a grimace across her face, and hatred searing in her eyes.
“What the hay, Starlight? What is he doing outside the castle?”
Starlight takes a step forward. “I’m taking some time to get to know him better so I can better teach him friendship. Is that so wrong?”
“Uh, yeah! Did you hear what he did?”
“What did he do?”
“He murdered one of Celestia’s guards. Murdered him! And assaulted Celestia, herself!”
“Yeah. He did. So, what?”
“So, he’s dangerous!”
Starlight stubs her nose up. “Well, I’m keeping a close eye on him. Nopony should have to worry about Joffrey doing anything unseemly.”
Rainbow Dash growls. “He should be punished for this.”
“Yeah. Well, he isn’t. Deal with it.”
“Deal with it? Seriously!?”
“Well, you’re not a Princess, are you?”
“So, what if I’m not?”
“So, it’s not your place to make those calls. It’s Twilight’s. Twilight is the Princess here, not you.”
You roll your eyes. All this nattering and bickering is boring you to tears. Looks like magical female horses aren’t that different from women after all. So, what do you do? Let it run its course, or intervene?
7686927
7687400 Winning comment(s).
Intervene.
For the record, I believe that Celestia and Starlight are being way too uncharacteristically lenient with Joffrey. He just killed a dude, for fuck's sake! How is he getting away with a "Bad Joffrey! Don't do it again!"?! Twilight and Rainbow are the only ones acting with their heads screwed on straight.
Intervene.
Sociopath Starlight is best Starlight. Keep it up.
7735842 As The Tallest pointed out, Starlight is a sociopath. She's not acting normal because she isn't normal. Why do you think she's the only one who wasn't outright disgusted with Joffrey upon meeting him?
7736539
vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/aceattorney/images/f/f9/SoJ_Objection%21.png/revision/latest?cb=20160909141244
Point the First: Two key factors in a diagnosis of sociopathy are lack of empathy and inability to form meaningful bonds. If Starlight was a sociopath, she wouldn't have been able to form the friendship with Sunburst that shaped her entire outlook on life for several years, nor would losing him have done so much damage to her in the first place. If Starlight was a sociopath, she wouldn't have risked life and limb on a borderline suicide mission to the Changeling Hive to save her friends and all of Equestria. She has a poor sense of personal boundaries and all the social skills of a sack of hammers, but she isn't a sociopath.
Point the Second: You failed to address the Celestia part of the problem. She might be forgiving enough to give Discord a second chance, but she wasn't dumb enough to leave him free without the Elements of Harmony at hoof's reach in case he went renegade, and she couldn't possibly be dumb enough to reform a REAL sociopath like Joffrey without some kind of plan B.
Point the Third, while I'm thinking of it: Why didn't anyone stop Joffrey with telekinesis before he murdered that guard? Twilight has already proven she has the power and reflexes to stop Joffrey mid-swing in the first chapter of this fic, and Celestia is the goddess/demigoddess/whatever of the sun.
I'm still having fun reading this story, but I'm still calling what I see.
7737588
>Point the First
Sort of depends on how you interpret her as a character. She did mind-rape Twilight's best friends without a shred of genuine remorse, and she did manage to start a cult with a sort of deceptive charm that could be described as sociopathic. There is evidence for it. Sure, there's evidence against it as well, but you could say the same thing about Joffrey. (And keep in mind the condition exists on a spectrum. Joffrey is, by far, more sociopathic than Starlight no matter how you slice it.) I'm not making any definitive statements one way or the other with canon!Starlight, as it is up for debate, but this story goes with the interpretation of her as a sociopath. Just something to keep in mind as the story progresses. I'm not challenging your interpretation of her.
>Point the Second
But Joffrey isn't a literal god of chaos who can turn the world into a fucked up Candyland at the snap of his fingers. Twilight could easily overpower him with her magic. That's their Plan B; it was implied at the end of the first chapter.
>Point the Third
It did come out of nowhere, which is why I allowed it to happen in the first place, but I definitely see your point here. And so would Twilight, if she ever read this post. As everypony's going to be more careful around Joffrey from this point forward, it shouldn't happen again.
7737689 ...Very well, then. I accept your reasoning... for now.