Twilight Sparkle marries Flash Sentry, and has many royal duties in Canterlot as Princess, and so she rarely gets to see her friends anymore. But the Princess of Friendship hides a dark secret. A secret hidden even from her closest friends and family
Everything in this chapter was ok just one little thing that would tick me and others off, FLASH BECAME AN F*** ALICORN! (For a few minutes at least)
When you did that, it kind of was hard for me to read it at all. I'm ok with alicorns, it's just if they become one from a stupid amlutet then that really turns me off. Even if that thing is real, then why didn't Sombra use this 'amlutet' when he came back to take over Equestria and why does he even have this much power to turn himself into one.
A more accurate way of doing this would be that this amlutet would increase his agility and magical resistance, and it gets more powerful from stealing some magic from an unicorn/alicorn like Twilight. (As you said it did) That would be better. Please change that when you edit your story because trust me when I say this but, your story is going to get a lot of hate because of that one scene.
Now sorry about that little rant but I just had to say it. Hope you improve upon this a bit better.
7458369 I planned to explain it later in the fanfic, but here you go
King Sombra made the amulet, but was defeated before he could use it. He had planned to use it again once he returned, however that was during the Crystal Empire episodes of season 3, where he was stopped.
The amulet had been hidden away all this time, deep under the Crystal Empire.
Enter Flash Sentry: Flash found the amulet, after being lured there by Sombra's spirit. The amulet holds incredible dark power, similar to the Alicorn amulet Trixie had, only it has the power to turn one into an Alicorn.
I plan on explaining more of it later in the fanfic.
This 'stupid' amulet was created by King Sombra, who, if you ask me, is underwhelmed in the show. He's a badass villain who barely gets any screen time, so I'm just trying to make it obvious how evil and powerful he is, since the show really didn't give us enough of that.
And how does he have that much power? Well, he is a badass Unicorn villain from 1000 years ago.
How did Starlight Glimmer alter Star Swirl's time spell in the season 5 finale? I still can't wrap my head around that one. In a way, I'm following the show's formula of having crazy things happening, without explaining too much of it.
7458444 I can understand what you are trying to say but, Sombra's power would be too powerful if he can make himself an Alicorn by pouring all of his magic into a amulet.
My version of the Dark king would be that he is a master of the dark arts but, we do not know who is controlling who. The mind of a King who is wise in plans and manipulation, or the Darkness of which can corrupt others without knowing. Even when he came back, he did not speak a single word to his opponents because the darkness has consumed his soul. The darkness will speak with his voice in the minds of others to become the same as Sombra or to become servants to it. The Darkness is an entity that has no body but has a soul black as ice. Sombra maybe powerful, but I think dark magic has a limit in a pony so the darkness will have to find a more suitable host to be with. Sombra was only defeated by the princess because he fought back against the darkness which made his powers a little bit weaker and when he was imprisoned, the darkness finally toke over his mind and soul. When he return, the darkness tried to find a new host but was interrupted by Twilight and friends.
That's my version of Sombra as he used the darkness to help in his conquest but ultimately failed since the darkness went and started to consume him. Still, the princess used dark magic but only a small amount while Sombra used too much of it. When you use it, you can hear it's voice and if your strong enough to resist it it's temptations, then you're safe.
Also, I think one reason is how Starlight used that spell to go back in time was with the power of the map as we don't know what properties it holds in the world. Maybe she tested it before using it for real.
That's what I believe but I really don't care on what you do with the story. I'm just saying my words and hope to see this come to a good close.
Glad he is gone and he won't be back any time soon. Hopefully Twilight gets her magic back.
Everything in this chapter was ok just one little thing that would tick me and others off, FLASH BECAME AN F*** ALICORN! (For a few minutes at least)
When you did that, it kind of was hard for me to read it at all. I'm ok with alicorns, it's just if they become one from a stupid amlutet then that really turns me off. Even if that thing is real, then why didn't Sombra use this 'amlutet' when he came back to take over Equestria and why does he even have this much power to turn himself into one.
A more accurate way of doing this would be that this amlutet would increase his agility and magical resistance, and it gets more powerful from stealing some magic from an unicorn/alicorn like Twilight. (As you said it did) That would be better. Please change that when you edit your story because trust me when I say this but, your story is going to get a lot of hate because of that one scene.
Now sorry about that little rant but I just had to say it. Hope you improve upon this a bit better.
7458358 She did Windows shattering, white glowing eyes xD Thanks for the comment
7458369 I planned to explain it later in the fanfic, but here you go
King Sombra made the amulet, but was defeated before he could use it. He had planned to use it again once he returned, however that was during the Crystal Empire episodes of season 3, where he was stopped.
The amulet had been hidden away all this time, deep under the Crystal Empire.
Enter Flash Sentry: Flash found the amulet, after being lured there by Sombra's spirit. The amulet holds incredible dark power, similar to the Alicorn amulet Trixie had, only it has the power to turn one into an Alicorn.
I plan on explaining more of it later in the fanfic.
This 'stupid' amulet was created by King Sombra, who, if you ask me, is underwhelmed in the show. He's a badass villain who barely gets any screen time, so I'm just trying to make it obvious how evil and powerful he is, since the show really didn't give us enough of that.
And how does he have that much power? Well, he is a badass Unicorn villain from 1000 years ago.
How did Starlight Glimmer alter Star Swirl's time spell in the season 5 finale? I still can't wrap my head around that one. In a way, I'm following the show's formula of having crazy things happening, without explaining too much of it.
7458444 I can understand what you are trying to say but, Sombra's power would be too powerful if he can make himself an Alicorn by pouring all of his magic into a amulet.
My version of the Dark king would be that he is a master of the dark arts but, we do not know who is controlling who. The mind of a King who is wise in plans and manipulation, or the Darkness of which can corrupt others without knowing. Even when he came back, he did not speak a single word to his opponents because the darkness has consumed his soul. The darkness will speak with his voice in the minds of others to become the same as Sombra or to become servants to it. The Darkness is an entity that has no body but has a soul black as ice. Sombra maybe powerful, but I think dark magic has a limit in a pony so the darkness will have to find a more suitable host to be with. Sombra was only defeated by the princess because he fought back against the darkness which made his powers a little bit weaker and when he was imprisoned, the darkness finally toke over his mind and soul. When he return, the darkness tried to find a new host but was interrupted by Twilight and friends.
That's my version of Sombra as he used the darkness to help in his conquest but ultimately failed since the darkness went and started to consume him. Still, the princess used dark magic but only a small amount while Sombra used too much of it. When you use it, you can hear it's voice and if your strong enough to resist it it's temptations, then you're safe.
Also, I think one reason is how Starlight used that spell to go back in time was with the power of the map as we don't know what properties it holds in the world. Maybe she tested it before using it for real.
That's what I believe but I really don't care on what you do with the story. I'm just saying my words and hope to see this come to a good close.
Hmph, he got what he deserves...