4. After an Exhausting Night
"Twilight? Twilight?" Fluttershy kept knocking on the door. She had been doing it for a while now and there was still no answer. In itself that wasn't weird — now that Twilight was a Princess, she had a lot of responsibilities. It was entirely possible for her to be called to Canterlot or the Crystal Empire or anywhere else in Equestria for that matter.
Oh, my, Fluttershy thought. Maybe I should come back later? I can't just go into her castle. What would I think if somepony went into my cottage uninvited? A faint purring sound on her back quickly changed her mind. No! I have to be brave! Taking a deep breath, she slowly opened the castle door and, making sure nopony was watching, went inside.
Books, she had to find books. If anything, last night had proven that Fluttershy could not take care of Moonlight without considerable help. Discord was kind enough to identify the species and explain a few basic things, but that was far from enough. And having a floating, glowing, dreamwalking kitten was a bit more even she could handle.
Twilight's library was, as always, in perfect condition, rearranged for the third time this month. Fluttershy distinctly remembered her friend mentioning that arranging books by author was far more efficient than going by book name. A questionable practice, but one that currently worked to the pegasus' advantage. Fluttershy happened to know the author in question. After the Philomena incident she had spent several weeks researching phoenixes. According to the forward, the author — Fauna Magnifica, PhD — had several more tomes on magical creatures. One of them had to have something on aether kittens.
"Are you alright, Moonlight?" Fluttershy asked, as she went through the rows of books. "You aren't hungry, I hope?"
The only response was a quiet purr coming from her back. Good. At least you are sleeping well. I do hope Princess Luna is as well. She did seem slightly tired after all the excitement this morning. Excitement was an understatement. The princess had spent the entire morning chasing after the kitten in Fluttershy's cottage. To make things worse, Moonlight kept on popping in and out of the dream world, further frustrating the Princess. By the time the matter was resolved both kitten and owner were completely exhausted. Oh, I do hope Angel Bunny is taking good care of Princess Luna.
MacCloud, MacIntosh, MacQuartz, Magnifica! There were four tomes in total. Fluttershy already knew the one about phoenixes by heart. That left three more. The first she picked contained a detailed descriptions of Tartarus beasts and monsters, along with their feeding habits. The next focused on sea creatures of various types. Finally, the third focused on chaos and aether beings.
"There, you see that, Moonlight?" Fluttershy opened the book at the index. "Now we shall learn everything about you."
The temptation to crack the book open there and then was tremendous. The pony, however, managed to resist. It wouldn't be fair to Luna to do so. No, the better thing to do was to take the book, leave a note for Twilight explaining Fluttershy was borrowing it, then go back to the cottage.
"Do you know what we are going to do now, Moonlight?" Fluttershy asked, as she started writing. A faint snoring sound came in response. As if somepony is gently squishing Equestria's tiniest chewy toy. Fluttershy placed a hoof over her smile. "Sleep well, little Moonlight," she whispered.
It didn't take long to finish the note. Fluttershy took the book and carefully put it in her saddlebag. That took care of that. Now to bring Luna the good news. Of course, she couldn't resist sliding a wing over the sleeping kitten. Maybe I should cover you with my wing? Oh, you're just so fluffy! No surprise Princess Luna calls you Puff. She trotted back outside.
A patch of clouds was forming in the sky. Weather ponies had already started preparing for the evening's showers. Unsurprisingly, Rainbow Dash wasn't among them. I would have liked Dashie to see Moonlight. Twilight also. I wish all my friends could see, but... maybe when he gets older. I wouldn't want any of them to harm you by accident. You are a baby kitten, after all.
“Hey, Fluttershy!” a raspy voice said above her. “What are you—”
“Shhh!” Fluttershy covered her back with both wings. “Not so loud,” she whispered. “You'll wake him up!”
A few feet above her, Rainbow Dash blinked, looked around, opened her mouth to ask something, closed it, the looked at Fluttershy again. Her expression yelled “Who? Who am I going to wake up?”
“There, there, Moonlight,” the yellow pegasus said to the nothing on her back. “Rainbow didn’t mean to wake you up.”
“Err, who are you talking to?” Rainbow Dash slowly circled her, carefully examining her with her specific what's-going-on frown. “Fluttershy, are you seeing things again?”
Again? “Oh, no,” Fluttershy smiled. “I'm just careful that—” suddenly she stopped. Oh, dear. Princess Luna told me she doesn't want anypony to know about Moonlight. What do I do?
“That?” Rainbow Dash pressed on. “That what?”
“Nothing.” Even her widest smile was incapable of hiding the guilty expression on her face. Maybe if I just continue to the cottage Dash wouldn't notice?
“Fluttershy…” Rainbow Dash eyed her.
“No, it's nothing!” Oh, there's too much pressure! I can't think of anything to say! “It's an imaginary kitten! Just a little imaginary kitten, I'm taking to the cottage.”
“You have an imaginary kitten?” Rainbow Dash crossed her forehooves. Fluttershy's explanation only seemed to make her all the more more skeptical, and ten times as curious. “That is having a nap, and you are taking it to your cottage?”
“Yes, that's it!” Fluttershy nodded eagerly. “Now I must hurry home and—”
“And where is this kitten?” Rainbow blocked her path. “On your head?”
“Oh, no. On my back. It's the Princess, that—” Eeep! I didn't mean to say that! Please, Dashie, just… Princess Luna will be furious if she learns I've said this much! As if to make things worse, the kitten chose the exact moment to wake up. Fluttershy felt it stir, dig its claws into her back and stretch. A yawn followed, accompanied, much to her horror, by a meow.
“Meow?” Rainbow Dash looked suspiciously at Fluttershy’s back. “Are you trying to prank me?”
“No! Yes!” Fluttershy cowered. Which is the right answer?
Unfortunately, tilting forward caused the kitten lose balance. Becoming visible, it quickly looked around for a more stable surface and leapt onto it. The surface happened to be Rainbow Dash's head. The pegasus’ reaction, as with any sane creature, was to try to get the kitten off. The kitten’s reaction was to remain on, no matter regardless of the claws or methods it had to use to do so.
“Get off!” Rainbow Dash darted into the sky, causing Fluttershy to become petrified with fear. No! the meek pony thought, utterly incapable of moving a muscle. All she could, was watch with horror, as Rainbow Dash went through a series of maneuvers, each aimed at freeing her of the kitten.
Ascent, double flip, dive, two-seventy turns, even the cloud cover was breached a few times, yet the only thing it managed to cause was to get the kitten to cling tighter to her mane.
“You asked for it!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “Prepare for the—”
“Stooooop!” a deafening scream pierced the air. Both Rainbow Dash and the kitten froze in mid air, staring, eyes wide, at the yellow fury that approached from the ground. For a split second both had come to the realization what they had done, as well as what consequences were to follow.
“Meow?” the kitten managed to squeak, before a furious Fluttershy flew by, snatched it from Rainbow Dash’s head, placed in her saddlebag, and flew away faster than anypony had ever seen her go before. Moments later, Rainbow Dash blinked, cautiously touched the top of her head with a hoof, then went to the nearest cloud for a nap.
* * *
Armies, I have defeated armies, Luna kept repeating to herself as she lay exhausted on Fluttershy's couch. Sombra, Discord, my sister, even. I took them down without breaking a sweat. Zap, poof, done! Why can't I handle one silly puff?!
The night had been exhausting to say the least. Not only had the kitten interfered with her work in each of the nightmares, but it had also proven incapable of remaining in once place for more than five seconds. The only time it actually listened was when Luna was shouting at it, and even then the effect was momentary. And if that was not enough, it had gone through a dozen dreams in search of her. It was a menace! An unadulterated evil menace! And it kept haunting her!
"Why, oh my!" The most annoying of voices drilled its way into Luna's ear. "Fancy meeting you here. I always knew you had a vibrant nightlife, but slumber parties at Fluttershy’s? I would never have guessed."
Slowly, Luna cracked an eye open. Just great. she closed it back again. Her head was hurting enough without having to look at an annoying draconequus.
"What?" She asked flatly, covering her face with a hoof.
"I'm hurt that you'd even suggest that!" The typical Discord lying approach. Luna knew from experience that he only started that way when he had done something seriously wrong. "Here I come to visit my good friend Fluttershy, and I get unjustly accused of—"
"Discord, I haven't even accused you yet." Luna grumbled. Apparently the universe has conspired not to let me get any sleep today! Begrudgingly, she stood up. Stars, please just let him be done quickly. "Let's have it."
"Why, Princess, whatever do you mean?" The draconequus feigned ignorance, a halo appearing above his head.
"I really don't have the ti—"
"But since you mentioned it, I'd like to thank you for making me the guest of honour at tomorrow night's Gala!" Discord didn't give her a chance to finish. "I couldn't be happier, knowing that all my Equestrian friends would be there. Really, it's too kind of you." He reached to kiss her hoof.
"I did no such thing!" Luna briskly pulled her hoof away. "And the Gala is months away!"
"What? Oh, you must be thinking of the Grand Galloping Gala." Discord waved a pawn laughing. "How silly of me. I was talking about the Grand Night Galloping Gala, or if you prefer G.N.G.G. for short."
"I've had it with your foolishness!" How does anypony put up with you? Even "reformed" you're a constant pain in the flank. "There is no such thing!"
"What's that?" Discord made a hearing horn appear and placed it next to his ear. "For a moment, it sounded like there wouldn't be a Gala event. Pity." He shrugged. "I guess I'll have to find some other way to pass the time. Maybe I'll go have lunch with Celestia instead. There are so many things we can talk about, like your magnificent moon kitten, for example."
Luna froze. How by the stars do you know of... Fluttershy! "I don't know what you're talking about." The alicorn looked away.
"Now, now." Discord waved a claw at her. "I'm sure there is nothing to feel ashamed about. All of us are adults after all. I'm sure that your sister would understand. She might even be proud of you. It's a great responsibility taking care of a pet, hiding it, feeding it, taking it to work. You probably have a lot of anecdotes you could share with her."
Curses! This was so typical! Leave it to him to try to take an advantage of everything. So many millennia and he hadn't changed a bit. What options did Luna have? She certainly wasn't going to organize a Gala, let alone make him the guest of honour. She stood a better chance fighting him in here and now. With some luck she could manage to defeat him. As long as no animal in the cottage got seriously hurt, she could—
"Princess Luna!" Fluttershy galloped into the room. "I... Oh." Seeing Discord she stopped. Her wings trembled for an instant before freezing in place again.
"Why, Fluttershy." Discord smiled widely, teleporting next to her. "So good to see you again. It's been ages!"
"Umm, but we had tea yesterday—" the Pegasus began, but was quickly interrupted.
"And what are these magnificent saddlebags?" The draconequus patted them. "Haute couture? You definitely have taste, as a changeling would say."
"Oh, thank you." Fluttershy looked away, blushing slightly. "I bought them from Rarity's."
"Yes, yes, very nice." Discord waved a paw dismissively. "And just large enough to hold a kitten, let's say?" He poked the saddlebag.
Just you dare harm Puff and I don't care what my sister or anypony has to say, I'll drag you to Tartarus myself! Luna felt her muscles tense up. How unfortunate that Fluttershy was here to see this. Nonetheless, Luna was ready. A fine blue glow surrounded her horn. The last time she had blasted anypony with all her might was during her battle against her sister. It wasn't going to be a pleasant sight, more than certain it was going to destroy the cottage, but still—
"Mew mew meow!" The moonlight kitten leapt out of Fluttershy’s saddlebag, flying straight toward her. In the blink of the eye, it had lodged itself onto her horn, chewing on it, as it were a sugarcone.
"You can't be serious!" Luna shouted. Even now, puff?! I'm about to start a battle with the Spirit of Chaos and you start chewing my horn! Now way in Tartarus I'm ever taking you to a battlefield! If you had been around we'd never have won a single war!
"Aww, isn't that cute?" Discord asked in his sweetish mocking voice, causing Luna to blush with embarrassment. This was beyond humiliating! "Maybe I'll take a few pictures?" The draconequus took out an instant camera and started taking photos. While Luna gritted her teeth, considering whether or not to charge at him, kitten and all, he took one of the prints and started waving it in the air. "I think I'm going to frame this. What do you think, Fluttershy? Would it look good on the ceiling?"
"I, umm," Fluttershy began, but once more Discord cut her short.
"Yes, you are quite right." The draconequus pulled the print away. "Who has time for this, when there's a Gala to prepare for. Isn't that right, you cute wittle thing?" He teleported next to Luna and started scratching the kitten under the throat. Apparently, Moonlight didn't appreciate it, for moments later it viciously bit Discord's claw.
Yes! You show him, puff! Luna smiled, feeling vindicated as the draconequus waved the kitten about in an attempt to get it to release him. That's what happens to those that oppose us! Actually, the puff did have some spirit. Anything that didn't like Discord couldn't be all bad.
"So, about the Gala." Discord snapped his fingers, transforming the kitten into chocolate. Both Luna and Fluttershy froze, eyes wide with horror, as the draconequus approached it to his mouth. Noticing their looks, he paused.
Monster! Luna wished to say, but the scene was too shocking for her to even budge.
"Oh, come on!" He snapped his fingers again with a frown. A very surprised kitten appeared in mid air, a few feet above Luna's head. It blinked, meowed once, then fell victim to gravity, plopping down on Luna's head. You did this on purpose, didn't you, you snake!
Feeling the safety of Luna's mane, the kitten quickly scurried inside, tearing a few hairs as it went. Instinctively, the alicorn though of the armies she had defeated, although this time the culprit was very much Discord. Just you wait! Vengeance shall be mine!
"Please, do you take me for a monster?" Discord took a bite of the chocolate kitten he was holding. "You hurt me deeply, Fluttershy." He put a hand on his forehead dramatically. "And I was thinking of inviting you to the Gala."
"There. Will. Be. No. Ga—" Luna began, stressing heavily on every word. Somewhere from within her mane the kitten meowed along with her.
"Although dinner with dear Celestia does sound so much more inviting." The draconequus rubbed his forelimbs. "Why, I heard the most remarkable story this morning. Seems like a filly and her mother brought a kitten. Quite the coincidence, don't you think? Apparently they got the idea from a dream, of all places. Now that's an interesting topic for discussion. Hmm?"
There was no avoiding it. Luna's options were clear — do as she was told or face the consequences... and that meant decades of sighs and passive-aggressive comments, separated by a snarky comment of two. Maybe I could tell Sis myself? That was an even worse idea. Even if Luna could swallow her pride and come clean, Celestia would ask why she wasn't told earlier. That would lead to the long topic of trust, and the relations between them, stirring memories from millennia ago, even before the whole moon incident. Tempers would flare, voices would be raised, Luna would destroy a castle tower in protest, the Elements of Harmony would arrive...
"Very well!" the Princess said through her teeth. I'll remember this! "You will be the guest of honour of my Gala at the end of the week!"
"Oh, Princess, you shouldn't have!" Discord turned away from her bashfully. "But since you insist, I've already arranged for everypony that's anypony to get an invitation!" A basket of envelopes appeared on the living-room table. "And some for Fluttershy's dear adorable friends." He grinned widely. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a speech to prepare! Have fun with your kitten!"
A poof and he was gone. Second worst day ever! Thinking about it now, it would have been easier just to fight him.
"Mew meow!" The kitten popped out of Luna's mane onto the floor. "Mew meow! Mew meow!"
"You said it, puff." The alicorn stroke it gently on the head. "Discord is one mew meow." Stars, what am I going to tell Tia?
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6991660 We have raised many... they have all now moved out into the world where they steal souls for their dark master.
I'm so proud of them!
Got the idea from a Drew, eh?
Who's drew?
6994376 Dream... O:)
I need to sleep more...
I thought Moonlight would go Nom Nom Nom on Luna's horn
Aww...that was the most adorable thing that I've read in ages! It reminds me of another fanfic that I read with my first ever account on here...that I deleted...by deleting the email attached to it...I wonder if I can find that story again.
Anyways, onto posting my cat related part of this comment!
I honestly expected Puff to have astrally dodged Discord's magic, materializing onto Discord's head even as he handled the transformed physical body of the kitten.
Throat
Missing some words, there.
Another excellent chapter Lise! I am loving Nightmare Meow!
6994504 :D That kitten at 2:27 :)))
6994684 :) Many thanks :D
All fixed up to 4 :)))
6994718 :D Thanks :) If you manage to find the name, please let me know. Would very much like to read that story :D
Hmm... Kitten Bowl? Such potential... O:)
6994735 Discord has a few tricks up his sleeve :)
6994396 Was Discord being the most passively aggressive telling her to just fess up?
Wow. He's a nice guy if albeit a dick in the way he did it.
...
Whoa. There's a really dirty pun to be had here.
6995639 Yikes! :)
6996537 :) Well even Didcord likes Galas O:)
6996555 lol, he is up to something. We just know it.... That kitten is super adorable!!!
6994962
After looking for it for a little bit (you wouldn't believe how hard it was to find...), I have finally found that story.
https://youtu.be/tig52sE-oxo
Kinda matches up with Luna and Puff's relationship.
6996661 Discord up to something? No way! :P
6996726 :))) Thank you! So sweet :D Never imagined Trixie with such a pet :)
6997995 :D It's a perfect match! Can't believe there is such a video :)
Thanks for linking :)))
6998070
You're welcome! And yes, yes it was adorable.
6996546 Indeed.
Dirty puns are just as bad as limericks.
I think that should say "four tomes in total."
7005999 Starswirl and his messy habits... :) The invisible tome has been removed. There are 4 again :D
put
*at the end of the week, Discord arrives only to be grabbed by a team of Bat-ponies*
"
"
"
Discord *nervously looking at the scaffolding*: "Wha--? Hey! LUNA!? What's going on?"
Luna: "Why, it's what you wanted, Discord. I'm here to see you get it!"
Discord: "I-I-I'm supposed to be the guest of honor at the Gala! This is--
Luna: "Are you sure? I could swear you had said you wanted to be the guest of honor at the Gallows!"
Discord: "oh futa!
*in Hades, a unicorn was watching the scene unfold*
Sombra: "Damn, bitch! And I thought I was dark!