Dinky Doo and the Quest for the Sacred Treats

by PaulAsaran

Part VIII: The Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray

Though none could know of the threat that was Sir Laughs-A-Lot and all did fear for the safety of the Timeless Lady Glen-of-Years, the Paper Squire’s party were still a jolly band as they made their way out of town. All, that is, save for the gangsters Bonnet and Clydesdale, but this was surely only because they had foalishly come to the wrong era to perform their nefarious deeds. Also troubled was the wizard Marelin, who continued to fret over wicked ponies ruining the squire’s grand adventure.

They passed the Clocktower, home of the nefarious Shearsmare, who might have been scary were she not so silly as to run around with shears. Her greatest weakness was, of course, rocks and pebbles that she regularly tripped over. The Paper Squire paid the tower no mind, though the party kept a wide berth just to avoid being seen by the rampaging mare. After all, if she did chase them and ended up hurting themselves, the adventurers would have that on their conscience.

Yet the witch Ben noted the time on the clock, and the witch Anti beheld the position of the moon in the night sky, and the witch And declared that the time of Nightmare Moon was soon. With time of the essence, the party hurried onwards to the Great Bridge of Greatness, a vast structure looming over the River of Sticks, which marked the edge of the holy lands of the Timeless Lady Glen-of-Years. Brave Pip the Pirate volunteered to cross first, followed by the loyal Tom Dumb and G’rain the Adventurer.

When they were but just beginning the treacherous crossing, the adventurers were startled by a great eruption of music, and lo, a literal organ did rise at the center of the bridge! The instrument was nothing short of a piece of architecture, towering over the heroes and belching steam. Every resonating note shook the bridge as a wicked – but admittedly catchy – dirge sounded from its many brass pipes.

And there, playing the instrument with hooves that danced and a laugh of only the finest menace, was a blue pony with a mane of white, her cloak an ominous green lined with the faux furs of her victims, covered in necklaces beset with vials and amulets of arcane purpose.

“Feast thine eyes and ears upon the very face of perfection,” announced the dastardly musician. “For I am only the greatest and most powerful of mages! The musician to trounce all others, the most beautiful mare of the Shadow Lands, she who shall end your silly little quest so that the glorious Nightmare may bring forth eternal night!”

She launched from her pedestal amidst a brilliant chromatic display of fireworks, the organ yet playing its magnificent dirge, and landed before our heroes in a pose most proud and inspiring. “Behold, you adventurers, the bringer of your doom! For I am the Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray!”

And the ponies gasped in wonder and horror, before Marelin did blurt out in a most unwizardly way, “Finally! Somepony who knows how to get into the act.”

Organ le Bray scoffed and flicked her mane with a grin most smarmy. “But of course! The Great and… er… that is, the Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray is a professional.”

“Oh, no!” cried Tom Dumb, “it’s the M.A.M.O.B.! How could we ever hope to defeat her?”

“I’m not afraid. Have at you, you villain!” cried Pip the Pirate in a manner the Paper Squire considered most heroic. Yet his charge was for naught, as a resounding blast of notes from the musician’s organ proved so forceful that it sent the poor pirate flying into the unprepared Bonnet and Clydesdale.

“Are we so eager to meet our doom?” Organ le Bray’s laughter filled the heroes with dread. “The Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray can see she is vastly superior to your feeble band, and so she offers a game, just to be fair and grant you the illusion of a chance; should any of you strike me with your magic, I shall surrender the bridge and permit you all to continue your quest.”

“We accept your challenge, Organ le Bray,” declared Marelin with a menacing shake of her staff. “And when you are defeated, I will hold you to your word.”

The sorceress demonstrated her disdain with a truly well-executed eye roll. “Oh, please, Marelin. Organ le Bray may be magnificent and malevolent, but she is also a mare of her word. Not that even you could defeat so powerful a being as I!” And she did rear back, and the organ did emit another crashing string of notes, and fireworks did alight the sky once more.

“We’ll see about that. Paper Squire, I require your assistance!”

At the very thought of casting magic alongside her mentor, the Paper Squire emitted a not-so-subtle squee and charged into the fray. Though her magic was not so amazing as that of the great and powerful Marelin, it was still quite exemplary, letting forth an array of sparks that were sure to intimidate even the mightiest of foes! Marelin assaulted her opponent with the greatest magics of her vast knowledge, conjuring forth destructive blasts, colorful rays of light and perhaps even summoning a parasprite or two, against her better judgment.

To the dismay of all, the Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray countered every attack; shields, redirects, and even mere dodging proved her a master of her musical craft! Thus did she return fire, and even the once indomitable Marelin was struck down by her arcane – and possibly cheating, or so the Paper Squire suspected – methods.

Seeing their glorious leaders so defeated, Tom Dumb and the gangsters retreated from the battle, fearing for their very lives. But of all the adventurers who might stride before the wicked mare, it was none other than G’rain the Adventurer himself who remained ready to battle – if only by the liberty of having been too slow to follow Tom Dumb.

“What is this?” laughed the vile sorceress. “Is the Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray to be challenged by this pathetic creature? Oh, how rich it is!”

Seeing their unexpectedly brave friend in mortal peril, the three witches did act upon their sisterly bond. Anti turned to Ben and spoke, “We have to help! You and I shall fight alongside our friend, and And… and… And and…” She did give a very convincing witch’s cry. “She will see to helping Marelin and the Paper Squire!”

Their course set, Ben and Anti joined G’rain in facing the wicked sorceress. “Don’t worry, G’rain, we’re with you,” announced Anti.

“Yeah,” Ben pressed as she pressed the protesting protagonist forward. “Now let’s show that jerk a thing or two.”

The sorceress did strike upon her organ with gleeful abandon as the challengers approached. “Come, then, you foals! Show the Magnificent and Malevolent Organ le Bray what you’ve got!”

The battle was joined! The witch Ben chose to forgo what would have certainly been powerful magic in favor of physical aggression, and would equally certainly have been crushed did not Anti lend her own significant magical prowess to the conflict. Organ le Bray dodged and danced from their assaults, laughing and mocking her foes for their futile efforts. Unfortunately, the brave G’rain appeared to be suffering from a magical misfire, and so struggled to provide any assistance at all.

Thus did it appear that the evil sorceress would prove victorious, and the Paper Squire dreaded the coming of Nightmare Moon! She watched in ever-growing dread as the sorceress avoided spell after spell, and not even the magnificent speed of Ben’s attacks could penetrate her musical barriers!

With the witches cornered between her and the edge of the bridge, the sorceress did chortle and cackle her most unpleasant glee. “So you see, none of you ever stood a chance! And so I shall demonstrate your powerlessness by slaying your mighty adventurer, like so!”

And she turned her hoof to the struggling G’rain and prepared to fire a lone spell. Unwilling to let their friend be ruthlessly crispified by the sorceress’s explosive and colorful might, the witches charged! Though their attempt failed yet again to penetrate her defense, the sorceress was indeed distracted by their brave effort, and so her spell flew wide and erupted in a shower of spark behind the trembling – from effort, most assuredly – G’rain.

With a blast so close, the brave G’rain did leap into the air, and a precise beam launched from his horn. The Magnificent and Malevolent Organ de Bray, focused as she was upon the witches, had naught the time nor the awareness to avoid a telling blow upon her flank. Thus did she rear back and give a dismayed cry.

“It cannot be! How could I, the most powerful and glorious mage in all of Equestria, be defeated? Oh, mighty and noble… uh…”

“G’rain,” hissed the witch Ben.

“Oh, mighty and noble G’rain, thou hast won a great victory this night!”

“Uh, I did?” asked G’rain, though this query was clearly a ruse to thwart any trickery the sorceress might be planning, as was his dumbfounded appearance.

“Well struck, G’rain!” declared Marelin, now healed thanks to the witch And’s expert ministration. She waved her staff at the sorceress. “You have been dealt a certain blow, Organ le Bray. Will you yield the bridge as promised?”

Though distraught by her own defeat, the sorceress acknowledged her wound with as much dignity as her wounded pride would permit. “Aye, the bridge and the way forward belong to you, great heroes. But remember this day, Marelin, for soon Organ le Bray shall be so Magnificent and Malevolent as to defeat all, even your fine adventurer!”

And so, with a wink to the wizard, the sorceress hitched herself to her great organ and trotted away, leaving the path open to the adventurers.

“Three cheers for the brave deeds of G’rain the Adventurer!” cried Marelin, and the heroes thus raised the noble and not-at-all blushing G’rain high and offered him much praise.

But their cheer was short-lived, for within seconds a great quack filled the air, and a billed face did appear in the wood below. T’was the enigmatic Ceiling… er… Alley… um—

“Bridge Duck,” whispered the creature.

T’was the enigmatic Bridge Duck, come to congratulate the heroes.

“I congratulate you heroes,” the duck declared with a grin of candy cone teeth. “You all did wonderfully, defeating the wicked sorceress Organ le Bray like that! Quack!”

“They have indeed performed splendidly,” Marelin acknowledged, bringing forth smiles to their collective faces. “But lo, the moon rises still, and soon will reach its peak. Time is of the essence, Bridge Duck. What warning do you offer us this time?”

And the Bridge Duck did turn dour, her eyes darting to each of the heroes in turn. “Grave tidings indeed, quack. Soon you all shall face the giggletastic Sir Laughs-A-Lot, who rivals even I in the madness department. Yet even he is not so deadly as the thing which shall come after! Quack! This is my final warning: do not judge an enemy by its size… or cuddliness!”

And the Bridge Duck did disappear, leaving the heroes to ponder her oh-so-mysterious words. Confused, yet emboldened by success, they pressed on across the Great Bridge of Greatness and to the home of the last Hero of the Kitchen Table.

Author's Note:

Come now, did you really think I would write something like this and not let Trixie get in on the act? Oh, you silly people. This was, without a doubt, one of the funnest of the chapters to write.

Organ le Bray = Morgan le Faye, a powerful enchantress and one of King Arthur's arch-enemies. In various versions she is said to be Arthur's half-sister, a former apprentice to Merlin and viciously hateful of Queen Guinevere.

Comments

[Ri2]

Too bad Trixie didn't fall into the river. Would that make her melt?

[ForSpite]

I did not expect Trixie for some reason. It was a fun chapter to read, so I'm glad it was fun to write.

They passed the Clocktower, home of the nefarious Shearsmare, who might have been scary were she not so silly as to run around with shears. Her greatest weakness was, of course, rocks and pebbles that she regularly tripped over.

If I remember the first couple games right, blows to the groin were also a significant weakness (if you mashed the struggle button hard enough), but tripping featured pretty heavily. I blame poor posture.