My Little Equestroid: Stompin' is Magic

by ForeverChasingRainbows

Chapter 26 - The Importance of Maintaining a Healthy Electrolyte Balance

**Thirty-Thirty**

"So," Thirty-Thirty grumbled as the door to the guest room once more closed behind them all, "I'm still waitin' for that explanation of just what the heck that thing was."

The little ponies he'd been trailing behind all turned slightly unnerved gazes on him, and at each other.

"Well," Rarity began tentatively, "how exactly does one phrase this..."

"Discord's kinda weird," Applejack said. Rarity huffed and aimed a slightly miffed glare towards her orange companion, who Thirty thought looked decidedly shifty. "Anyhow, would you, uh, excuse us for a minute? Girl talk."

Without waiting for a response from Thirty-Thirty, and despite several protests from the other three ponies, Applejack grabbed hold of her friends and bundled them into the adjoining bathroom. With a wooden thud and the snap of a bolt being thrown, Thirty-Thirty found himself staring at the outside of a closed door. Despite his annoyance, he couldn't exactly follow them and demand an explanation - even if they'd left the door open, it was a smaller, pony-sized one and he'd probably struggle to get through it.

He glared at the small door for a while, but it steadfastly refused to explode in response to his frustration. With an angry snort, Thirty sat down against the wall and contented himself with listening in to the supposedly secret conversation the ponies were having - at a volume clearly audible through the closed door.

**Applejack**

Applejack stood resting her forehead against the inside of the door, one hoof still hanging on the bolt. She could feel the different textures of the three silences behind her. One expectant and slightly distracted, one anxious, and one... well, the third one was a little more eloquent. Right now it was saying something along the lines of "I'm not used to being roughly shoved into a bathroom, and you'd better have a very good explanation lined up." Somehow there was a disapproving glare in it too.

"Okay," Applejack said, the word rushing out on an exhaled breath as she turned to face the group behind her. "Would somepony mind tellin' me what in the hay we just did back there? 'Cause I don't think I liked it."

She thought they might deny it. Maybe even hoped they would. Hoped that it was just her, that she was jumping at shadows. The way all three of her friends said nothing, and just looked at each other with worry plain on their faces, banished what little doubt Applejack had left.

"Y'all saw what happened to Twilight," she pressed, trying to get some sort of reaction from them, "I can't tell ya how happy I am that Rainbow's okay, but... I think there was somethin' real wrong with what we just did."

"Was it the part where Twilight got all big and spooky," Pinkie asked, her bright but speculative tone completely at odds with what she was actually saying, "or the part where it felt like every last bit of joy and light inside you had just shrivelled up and died? 'Cause I wasn't really a fan of either, to be honest. Everything's back to normal now though, so it's all good."

The first part she was expecting, but the second gave Applejack pause. "I was more kinda talkin' about what happened to Twilight but... what?"

"Uh... just me, then?" Pinkie said.

"I can't say my experience quite matches yours, Pinkie," Rarity supplied uneasily, "but there was definitely a second aspect to what happened."

Fluttershy just let out a little squeak and hid behind her mane as the others turned to her.

"So you two got somethin' else too?" Applejack asked.

"There was an incident that we agreed never to speak of again," Rarity said primly, "just after we first became acquainted with Discord. This wasn't quite as... focused on one particular object as that, but it was definitely similar. I'm in no particular rush to dive headlong back down that road however," she said with a small shudder, "I've already seen what an excess of my own desires can lead to."

She knew she shouldn't, but Applejack couldn't resist poking that rattlesnake a little. "I seem to recall ya turned everythin' into gems—"

"Yes, thank you, Applejack," Rarity replied.

"So did we all get something different?" Pinkie Pie chimed in. "Fluttershy, what did you get?"

There was the barest whisper of a reply from beneath the concealing sheet of pink hair, and Fluttershy screwed her eyes closed. After a little coaxing and cajoling, the best the other three managed to get out of her was "I don't want to talk about it."

Applejack tipped her hat back to rub at her mane. "Well that's a puzzle. I mean, it was sorta remindin' me of Discord after ya mentioned it—"

"No!" Fluttershy's head shot up, eyes wide with shock. "He wouldn't! He's not like that any more."

"I know, Fluttershy, I know," Applejack said. "Like I was sayin', it was remindin' me of that after what Rarity said, but even if all three of ya got something similar, I got nothin'."

"Really?" Rarity asked, "Nothing at all?"

"Nope." Applejack said simply. She thought she caught a hint of scepticism in Rarity's gaze, and bristled. "An' I ain't lyin' about it, neither!"

"I didn't say anything, dear."

But you— Aw, shoot, Applejack winced internally. First you poke at 'er, and then you near bite her head off for no dang reason.

"Sorry, Rarity." Applejack said, ears dropping. "And for needlin' at ya before. I've just got this feelin' like somethin' real bad is about to happen. It's makin' me nervous."

"Don't mention it, Applejack," Rarity replied, "I believe we're all a little 'strung out' at the moment, as it were."

"I hope Twilight's okay," Pinkie said, smile fading a little, "I mean, we don't know what any of that was even like for her, and then Princess Celestia wanted to talk to her about windmills, or maybe dark magic and sanity slippage... eh, I always get those mixed up. Practically the same thing anyway. Whichever, Twilight seemed super nervous about it."

"Hopefully she won't be detained too long," Rarity said. "Regardless of what's happened, I'd rather we were all together. Especially given that Rainbow Dash still needs our help."

All four ponies' ears perked at the slightly muffled sound of the room's main door opening, and Applejack turned back to unlock the bathroom.

**Twilight Sparkle**

Twilight was so distracted that she walked straight past the door to the room. Her legs automatically started her off out of the castle and towards her old tower, eyes pointed at the ground but focused on something internal as she churned everything over in her brain.

Whatever the heck Discord was going on about can wait until later. I'm not touching that heap of crazy until after I get done with the rest of... well, everything, I guess. An annoyed grimace flashed across her face as she plodded through the familiar corridors. All of this is far too disorganised, I need to prioritise. Although, given that I've only got a day to use before we go after Rainbow, that pretty much sorts things for me. Rainbow first, then whatever the hay happened to me in that nightmare, then Discord. Which means today is information-gathering day, we're going to need to be as prepared as we can be for tomorrow morning.

Twilight felt a nervous twinge in the pit of her stomach. There was only a day to go before a test, and she hadn't even started preparing. With an effort of will she crushed the growing bundle of nerves - it wasn't anypony's fault that there was so little time to prepare, and she could still fit plenty of research into a day. The knowledge that her friends would be coming with her was also a huge comfort.

She almost made it out of the castle before she realised where her errant hooves had carried her, and had to rather awkwardly reverse direction in the middle of a courtyard before hurrying back inside. Twilight still had to suppress a small flush of embarrassment, even if nopony had seen her.

As she arrived back at the right corridor, forcing herself to slow down to a more normal walking pace, Twilight rounded the corner to an unusual sight: There was a familiar Noctral guarding the room's large door.

Okay, I know I wasn't paying attention when I walked past the first time, but she definitely wasn't there a minute ago. I would have noticed that for sure, Twilight thought. She sure does seem to be popping up around us a lot lately...

"Is... there a problem?" Twilight asked as she approached. She noted that Nightshade had apparently lost her helmet again - or maybe had chosen not to wear it.

Nightshade saluted, but kept her eyes forward. "No, Ma'am."

"Then I'm confused," Twilight said, "why are you here?"

One slitted eye darted in Twilight's direction, then forward again. "Orders."

"Oh." Twilight shifted a little on her hooves. "So, uh... is the rest of your squad okay? I know you all got hurt last night, and I can't help but feel a little responsible."

"They're all fine." After a pause that was just fractionally too long to be accidental, the guard added, "Ma'am."

Ouch. Somepony's cranky today.

Twilight was about to try another approach when Nightshade interrupted. "The Princess wants it guarded. Don't know why after what it's done to her, but I didn't ask. Personally, I think it'd be easier if we just tossed it in a hole and forgot about it."

A masculine voice growled from the other side of the door, "Right back at ya, short, dark and moody."

Twilight looked back and forth between the guard and the door. "Okay, what happened here?"

"She turned up a couple minutes ago," Thirty-Thirty said, voice still slightly muted by the wall. "I answered the door, 'cause I'm the only one that's not currently hidin' in the bathroom, thinkin' they're bein' sneaky. She weren't happy to see me. Once she figured out we could actually understand each other, she decided to flap up into my face and tell me how all o' this was my fault. I objected to that. She's stayin' on that side of the door where I can resist the urge to punt her through a wall."

Nightshade's nostrils flared, her ears flicked, and Twilight took a nervous step to one side. The Noctral stayed at her post, but she was almost vibrating with anger. "I'm going to find out what you're really doing here," she growled, fangs bared as her jaw clenched, "and then you're going to answer for what you've done to Luna!"

With that the guard finally turned her head to address the door, revealing to Twilight why she hadn't done so until she'd lost her cool. The right side of her face was sporting a bruise almost as purple as her mane, and her right eye was swollen half shut. The light from one of the windows glinted off something tucked away down by the wall on one side of the door, and Twilight thought she could just about see the vague shape of a helmet in the mangled piece of dark purple metal.

"Whoa, whoa, okay," Twilight interrupted hurriedly, "I think everypony needs to just take a second to calm down here—"

"I am calm," Thirty-Thirty replied. "If I wasn't, I'd've hit 'er properly, an' you'd still be lookin' for her head."

Twilight glared daggers at the closed door. "Not. Helping."

"That thing is an aberration," Nightshade growled, making a visible effort to face forward and stay at her post, "and it doesn't belong in our world. All it's done since it got here is spread chaos and violence, and it obviously has impulse control issues."

In the interests of diplomacy, Twilight refrained from voicing her brain's comments about violent aberrations with poor impulse control throwing stones from their glass houses.

"It's dangerous, and it shouldn't be roaming free around the castle," the guard went on. "Especially not armed, or sharing a room with the Elements of Harmony."

Twilight flinched momentarily, but the lack of response from behind the door suggested that the comment hadn't been interpreted as a challenge for the weapon. She tried her best to channel Celestia's 'I'm putting my hoof down, and I'm disappointed in you' tone, and spread her wings.

"I think everypony has said quite enough for the time being." Lighting her horn, Twilight began to shove the door open. "You two both need to stop yelling at each other and cool off. I think everypony else would appreciate a little more patience and understanding between the pair of you."

The guard acknowledged her automatically as the door closed behind Twilight, but the best she got from the giant stallion sat up against the wall inside it was a non-committal grunt. After the door closed, she did her best to look down angrily on something that was significantly taller than her - even while sitting down.

"Is there a problem that you won't try to solve with violence?" Twilight demanded, tossing her head and trying to stop her ears twitching. "How is assaulting a pony going to solve anything?"

"There are some things ya can't say without expectin' it to start a fight," Thirty-Thirty replied, his apparent lack of concern at her obvious annoyance only serving to make Twilight angrier. Then he snorted, rolled a shoulder and said, "Bat's got a point, you know. I was wonderin' why ya hadn't tried takin' my gun."

Oh, crapbaskets.

Twilight stopped, and considered her words carefully.

This is either a deliberate ploy to get me to directly challenge him for his weapon, or he's genuinely curious, which means...

"Hypothetically..." Twilight said carefully, "if I were to, um, imply that I wanted to... disarm you, what would you do?"

Please don't try to kill me...

"I'd probably wonder why you hadn't done it earlier, and ask why the heck you're dancin' around this like I'm about to fly off the handle if you so much as suggest it." As Twilight was about to respond, Thirty-Thirty added, "Not that I'd be too pleased about it, but I was kinda expectin' it."

Twilight sagged a little, letting out a relieved breath. "Oh, good. It's just, with the, uh..." she waved a hoof vaguely at the seated biped's hulking form.

Thirty-Thirty glanced down at his own chest, then back up at her. "What?"

"Oh," Twilight said, "cultural context. Right. First, you look, sound and act quite a bit like a minotaur. They're large, bipedal—"

"I know what a minotaur is," the stallion interrupted.

Twilight tilted her head quizzically. "Wha- how?"

"I mean, I would'a said they were as imaginary as unicorns about a day ago," Thirty-Thirty said, "but seein' as how I'm currently talking to a miniature purple unicorn with wings, at this point I wouldn't be surprised if you started tellin' me about manticores and talkin' seahorses. And I'm pretty sure someone mentioned minotaurs earlier, along with dragons
and griffins. What exactly does that have to do with anything?"

"Well, minotaurs are patriarchal and very martially-centered." Twilight said, her frustration now entirely forgotten in the face of a chance to explain something. "All bulls are armed as a part of their passage into adulthood. The weapon is, culturally, a part of them. It means a great deal to them, and their attainment of it is seen as proof that they're worthy of it and competent in its use. Mostly they aren't carried around, and their use is confined to ceremony and honour duels, but those in military or guard positions carry them at all times. Trying to take a bull's weapon from them is both a challenge to their worth as an individual and a challenge to combat. In their view, a bull only yields his weapon when it's taken from him by force, and..." Twilight swallowed a nervous lump in her throat, "let's just say that it takes an awful lot of force, and minotaurs aren't easy to calm down."

"Still not seein' why this applies to me at all."

"Apparently not, thankfully," Twilight said, "it's our preconception, not yours. You're a large, aggressive male biped with a weapon that apparently warrants a pet name, and which is, as impossible as it seems, actually a physical part of you because it appeared out of nowhere when you transformed earlier. We have a history of not making an issue out of individuals like you carrying a weapon, because they have a history of violently attacking anypony who does. Although," she added, "you seem to be finding reasons to do that anyway."

Thirty-Thirty didn't reply to her probing, but Twilight noted that he also avoided her gaze. She tensed up briefly as he raised a hand to draw the weapon out from behind his back, but relaxed a little at the slow, considered speed of the motion.

"I'm gonna put this here," he said, gently leaning the cannon-like device against the wall beside him before turning back to stare at Twilight. "You don't mess with her, ya don't touch her, ya don't even look at her funny 'less I say so. Got it?"

"That's acceptable for now," Twilight said, "but you really don't need to be carrying things like that around here."

"And that goes for the four o'ya back there, too. No touchin'," Thirty added, raising his voice a little. "Ya might as well come out, y'ain't exactly bein' subtle at this point." A hint of movement drew Twilight's attention to the bathroom door as it edged open, solving the mystery of where everypony else had gone. For some as-yet-unexplained reason, it seemed as if Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie and Fluttershy had all been in there at the same time. All four of them were peering tentatively around the opening door, like they were considering slamming it shut again at the first sign of trouble.

"What are you all doing in there?" Twilight asked.

"Just, uh," Applejack began, edging back into the room, "just wanted a little privacy for a minute there. Had some stuff to talk about." Pinkie and Rarity moved out after her, followed much more reluctantly by Fluttershy. All of them kept their distance from Thirty-Thirty, but Twilight realised they didn't seem to be in a hurry to approach her either.

"Oh." Twilight thought she had read the group's nervous mood correctly, but now she wasn't so sure. Rather than being directed at the oversized alien that just punched a guard in the face, it seemed to be aimed at her as well. She was hiding something from them, true, but Princess Celestia had asked her not to give them the details - and there wasn't any way they could know about all that anyway, she hadn't even told them about tomorrow yet.

Was their experience in Rainbow's dream really that bad? Twilight wondered. I still don't exactly know what happened to me, or what they saw...

Applejack stood awkwardly for a moment, not saying anything as she looked everywhere but directly at Twilight.

Okay, there are only two ways Applejack lies, Twilight thought. First, when she's working off incorrect information, like when somepony else is lying to her - which she really hates, because it's the only time she actively ends up lying, even if it's not her fault - and second, by omission. Which is the only way she does it on purpose, which means she doesn't want me to know what they were talking about. Or maybe it's about Thirty-Thirty, and she doesn't want to say it in front of him... but why do I still feel like she's hiding something from me in particular?

Rarity interrupted Twilight's stream of thought, expression concerned but a little hopeful. "So, how did it go?"

Or they're just worried about you, doofus, Twilight snarked at herself. They did sort of leave you alone with the Princess for what probably looked like a nasty conversation. Paranoid much?

Twilight felt the smile on her face become more natural as she started to piece together how she was going to explain everything. "Good, I think," she said. "Maybe great actually. I've got some good news about Rainbow, anyhow. We've got the rest of today to rest up and prepare. Tomorrow, we're bringing her home."

**Rainbow Dash**

"Argh!" Rainbow Dash threw her hooves up in frustration, and then let herself fall from her seated position onto her back. "Why am I the one who got sent here, seriously?! This is, like, the perfect thing for Twilight to be doing. Or maybe Pinkie, she can do some pretty amazing stuff with pictures. I suck at this stuff."

Her efforts to form some sort of understanding with her travelling companion had met with little success. He wasn't getting any closer to saying her name right, and even then Rainbow was still kicking herself over how long it took her to get to the whole 'point at yourself and tell them what your name is' thing. The pair of them had been sat in the mine tunnel for what felt to her like hours, while Rainbow tried again and again to get him to say it right. They hadn't even gotten to his name yet, but she'd totally have that down in no time.

"Yeah, but you suck at a lotta things," a disturbingly familiar voice said from just behind her right ear.

Rainbow Dash flipped over and sprang upright, eyes wide and ears searching.

"Who said that?" she demanded, cursing inwardly at the nervous crack in her voice. Twisting her head and turning her body around didn't reveal anything beyond the expected tunnel walls, portable lights and giant freaky alien, which was now giving her an odd look.

No way. That thing was just a nightmare, and we blasted it with the elements too! Rainbow checked around herself again, but there was no sign of the mirror double from her dream. Shaking herself off, as if she could toss the nagging fear out of her head the way she could water from her coat, Rainbow returned to her spot on the floor. Ugh, stupid cave. Hearing things. When are we getting out of here anyway?

Retrieving the salt lick from where she'd left it on the floor, Rainbow found herself reflecting on her situation again. She didn't have much to go on in terms of the way she'd been sent to another world, aside from 'there was a portal, and some magic happened'. The only thing she could really think of to do was to return to the place she'd arrived, and maybe try to figure out a way back from there. She wasn't thrilled at the prospect of going back to the weird metal bunker though.

What am I even doing following this thing around? How is that gonna help me get home? Rainbow wondered, barely even noticing the taste as she absently licked at the salt block. I mean, he seems okay for a weird alien thing, but what exactly am I achieving here?

The large creature seemed to take her silence as a cue, and held an arm up to its chest.

"~BraveStarr~."

Okay, okay, we'll do your... wait a second.

Rainbow refocused her wandering eyes on the alien, ears on alert. "Say that again?"

"~BraveStarr~."

If it hadn't bean put directly into her memory, Rainbow was pretty sure she wouldn't have recognised the sound. Fortunately, it had - and only a few hours ago too.

"That's you?" Rainbow exclaimed, before her enthusiasm dried up as rapidly as it had appeared. "This is, well, kinda sorta awesome? I guess? I mean, I have no idea what I'm meant to do with you. Or why I'm meant to find you, or anything else that might actually be useful." She took another lick of the steadily-shrinking cube in her hoof, and added, "But I found you, so... yay me?"

It took a moment for Dash's brain to pass the note informing her that her interlocutor was looking confused by her lengthy response, and a little longer to realise that she might just end up regretting her earlier thoughts about how learning the alien's name was going to be easy. Rainbow grimaced and pressed a hoof to her forehead, and then jerked a little in surprise as something damp poked against her fur. An inspection of the apparently empty hoof offered no explanation. Only when the alien opposite her started laughing, and she felt something sticky dragging on her mane, did Rainbow realise what she'd just done.

"Why me?"

Comments

[ForeverChasingRainbows]

So yeah, I'm not dead. And neither is this.

There may or may not be a new year's resolution involved.

[Mix-up]

great to see an other chapter to this great story, I can wait to see what will happen next.

[Starcat5]

7827173
Eh, I have waited longer between updates on fics. Doesn't make the waiting any easier, though. Glad to see this one up and running again.

[Aprion]

Yay update been looking forward to this Keep it up.

[Boss_Hoss1]

Sweet! More 30-30 badflankness!

[Starcat5]

Six months. That is all. 😱

[wlam]

"That thing is an aberration,"

I think you mean "abomination" there. "Aberration" means something closer to outlier or exception. It's unusual, but not necessarily bad. Abomination, on the other hand, is explicitly a value judgment, which seems more fitting in context.