Friendzone ain't magic

by Marshall_Evergreen

Love stinks

Author's Note:

I apologize if anyone was distressed by the fact that Spike's drinking and isn't even 21. I don't live in the USA so such customs often escape my immediate consideration. GO BRITAIN!
Hope you guys enjoy this new chapter which will hopefully shed some light on Spike, Soarin and Discord's friendship as well as why AJ isn't too exhilarated by this whole fiasco.
Bon appetit!

The squad had each taken their places on the red leather stools that lined the bar, happily chatting away with no care in the world.

"Hey," Spike called out, swaying a little on his seat, "Ya know what stinks?"

He paused for affect before breathing out the answer.

"Love."

Soarin laughed and slapped him on the back, really with no clue as to what was going on, so long as it meant another drink.

"I mean, we're cool like...nachos and cheese dip, ya know? We're amigos, bros, homies, wolves of the pack, yahdah-yahdah-yahdah. But, it's just how we take our friendship for granted." At this point Spike was preaching it, with tears streaming down his face, "We assume people are always gonna be there for us but when we turn around; BAMF! No one."

There was silence for a bit as Spike sat back down only to stare deeply into his drink.
"I dunno man, maybe it's not me. Maybe, it's...the rest of Equestria, ya know?" He then proceeded to drain the drink in one.

Discord hid his face in his paw, mentally kicking himself for giving the cider to Spike. Discord himself didn't drink. One (and the most important of reasons) is that he feared what Fluttershy would do to him if she knew, and two...well, let's say that giving the Lord of Chaos liquid chaos was a bad mixture and was sure to explode in a cloud of cotton candy. all that aside, he didn't need cider to have fun.

However, what he was currently enduring wasn't about fun at all. It was about Spike. If he wasn't going to talk about the problem openly well...that's what the alcohol is for. Having to endure the crap that inevitably accompanied it was the worst part.

"So I take it you got friendzoned?" Soarin said in a mellow tone, still none the wiser.

Spike belched and roared with bitter laughter. "Not friendzoned dude, utterly destroyed. Man, she ripped my heart out in front of me and gave it to her stinking coltfriend. But hey, I don't care. Her loss..."

He didn't sound convincing and Discord was more than confident he was completely oblivious to what he was actually saying.

Soarin coughed and looked up in awe at Spike, "Woah! She ripped out your heart? How are you alive? Does it bleed? How do you feel?"

Discord was aware that out of the three males present, Soarin had the greatest tendency to ask 'stupid' questions. And with a bit of drink down the gullet, he was the perfect weapon in getting Spike to talk. Not that either of them knew what was going on, they were far too drunk.

Call it manipulative if you like, but Discord preferred to think of it more as friendly dynamics.

"I'm not alive bro, I'm just not dying."

"Deep."

They both stopped to drink some more before Soarin started up again.

"Hey, can I tell you something...like, from the pit of my heart?" Soarin asked dramatically.

"Shoot."

"I don't take you for granted." He took a moment to stare Spike in the eyes, trying to emphasis the gravity of his words, "You and Discord are my bros. For Luna's sake you guys hooked me up with Rainbow! So, even if Rarity didn't work for you, you're still a great friend and should take pride in that."

Spike looked him in the eye again. "For real?"

"Cross my heart and hope to fl...hey, what do I say if I can already fly. Aww, screw it. You know what I'm sayin'!"

"Yeah," Spike just nodded his head dumbly, before tearing up, "I love you too man!"

At which point he lunged forward and embraced the pony, crying into his shoulder as Soarin followed suit, trying to comfort him.

Discord rolled his eyes. It seemed incredible that all it took to make Soarin say something profound was through intoxicating him. Then he shrugged it off; who was he to question what made sense? Being Discord and all.

---

Now Applejack had seen her fair share of lightweights in the past, but none of them came close to Spike. He had just spent the last hour crying, ranting and laughing. Mood-swingy Dragons and alcohol apparently didn't go together. She chuckled lightly to herself. Though getting him to talk by getting him drunk hadn't been the most honest way to handle the situation, she still thought it was rather cute...well, in hindsight at least.

Cute...

Applejack started to feel the familiar emptiness surround her as she studied her feelings.

Applejack had always thought of Spike as being a reliable friend, and had been greatly impressed and touched by his eagerness and willingness to serve. Though lately she'd started to feel something more. After thinking about an incident years back, where Spike had saved her from a giant Timberwolf, she had started to realise just how noble and brave he was. She'd started by denying any such emotions, but eventually she gave in, feeling only a desire to embrace these new found emotions.

She held onto it even though it caused her heartache. This was of course due to the Dragon's feelings for Rarity and no matter how AJ looked at it, she would never match her competition. She could out run almost anypony and she had outstanding strength, but she wasn't...well, Rarity.

No, that was a stupid thing to say! She loved her life. She loved who she was. But at the same time, what does that matter if no one else does? She was frustrated and hurt, but more angry at herself for allowing herself to get into this state of mind. Applejack was inclined to view love as a hindrance more than anything. After all, Spike would never love her, so why bother...

But here he was...

And here he had been for the past four days. So why didn't she at least try? Was she scared? Scared that if he rejected her, she'd turn out exactly as he had now. Besides, he was still too hung up on Rarity to notice her.

'Even when he's been rejected he still loves her...'

He was hurting. That was why he was here, trying to drink it away or cry it out, anything to get rid of the heartache. But it was no good. He still loved her and it turned him bitter. Applejack had had to put up with it for four nights and she feared it would continue; the very sight of him hurt her.

She was wrenched away from her thoughts as Discord poked her on the shoulder.

"Why the long face?" He purred softly, drawling out each word in a soft, conspiratorial whisper.

"That ain't none of yer business." Applejack huffed and turned away. She wasn't going to lie, but there was no way she'd tell him the problem.

Discord merely grinned, amused by Applejack's stubbornness.

"Oh come now, AJ. Tell Dissy your troubles."

"No!" Applejack said, annoyed by Discord's persistence. She really wanted to say. She needed to tell someone, just not Discord. Spike laughed and Applejack stole a glance at him.

Discord noticed this. He noticed the deep longing in Applejack's eyes. He followed her eyes before...No, really? Oh this was too precious! Applejack and Spike. He then grinned smugly and turned back to Applejack who was now looking down solemnly as she dried off another glass.

'Time for some fun!' He thought with a devilish grin.

"Soo Applejack..." He drawled and smiled again when he got a rather bemused scowl from Applejack in response.

"What?" Applejack replied through gritted teeth.

"How have the past four nights been, couldn't have been easy trying deal with this lump of lard moping about."

He of course was referring to Spike, who wasn't exactly as lumpy and lardy as he had been a few years ago.

Applejack drew out an airy sigh, before replying. "Dandy, just dandy."

Though her tone and composure were cool and relaxed, Discord knew he was getting close.

"Really? No long speeches about Rarity and how beautiful she is? Or, long nights of crying? Any fires?"

"Nope."

"Well then, what about you? I noticed Spike hasn't exactly been considerate of others while he's been throwing his tantrum."

Applejack gulped loudly, notifying Discord he'd hit a nerve. Once again, he smiled smugly.

"Dandy, just dandy."

Discord frowned. He was tired of the game, time to be blunt.

"Do you take me for an idiot, Applejack?" He asked, frustrated, "You don't live through ten centuries without picking up a couple hints."

"Besides," He added nonchalantly, "you're a terrible liar."

Applejack hid her eyes under the brim of her hat, trying to hide her embarrassment.

Knowing he'd finally won, he leaned in close to the quivering mare.

"I'm all ears." He said, before magically enlarging his ears, just to prove his point.

Comments

[Marshall_Evergreen]

So this one isn't terribly long, just something to keep you occupied.

[vlaarith]

Its Bon appetit damn british who doesn't know his damn french

You are what is wrong with Canada!

(edit: I had forget the words know)

[Marshall_Evergreen]

6203978 This has to be the best thing I've read all day!
I was so tired when I wrote this, now I can only laugh at how stupid that mistake was. This is what happens when I try
Oopsy.
well It's all corrected now though.
Thank you so much for pointing that out.
I'm just glad I'm not Canadian otherwise I probably would have taken that to heart XD

[Marshall_Evergreen]

6203978 See people, this is constructive criticism! Have a mustache my good sir

[vlaarith]

6204080

And have a damn pancake with your space monkey new2.fjcdn.com/comments/I+thought+usa+stopped+sending+monkeys+into+space+decades+ago+_e064f4ff56f3b6efc42915cfe4318f1b.jpg

[basicfangirl]

Soarin and Spike's 'confession' - I just cracked up fave chapter

[Jake The Army Guy]

That was why he was here, drying to drink it away or cry it out,

Trying

[TwibraFlattercordlover]

"I'm Pinocchio." I said, before magically enlarging my nose, just to prove my point.

[Rexy]

6938848
Maybe dying?