Tarnished Silver and Clouded Diamonds

by David Silver

2 - Lost Foals

Silver retreated backwards until she ran into the bed, quivering in fear. "W-w-what are you?"

The kindly voice seemed to drift closer to Silver Spoon, only heightening her terror. "This is my cabin, and your friend is hurt, poor thing."

Silver's eyes went to Diamond Tiara, who looked confused. "What?" She looked herself over and span in place until she found the bite the wolf left on her. She went rigid at the sight of it.

"Don't panic," urged the voice. "Poor thing, you're still in shock."

"I'm not in shock!" declared Diamond, and she wasn't entirely wrong. As time went on, the pain began to creep back in, and her flank stung with the ragged wound she had suffered. "Do you have any bandaids, stupid voice?"

"Only if you ask politely."

Silver sat up in place and put her forehooves together. "Please, miss, uh, voice? Can we have some bandaids for my friend?"

A soft dull yellow light led Silver to a small box under the bed, where old bandages and a sealed bottle of alcohol was hidden, as well as a needle and thread. Silver didn't even try to contemplate why one would need a needle or thread in a first-aid kit. "Diamond, come here and sit down."

Diamond bit back a retort and approached Silver, sinking in front of her with her wounded flank on display. "Just... be careful... OK?"

Silver smiled gently at her best friend. "I'll be super careful, alright. Just stay still as best as you can." Silver got to work, cleaning the injury with the alcohol poured onto a rag, then wrapped the bandage around a few times, securing the wound and biting the bandage free. It wasn't a professional job, but it looked a lot better than the blood getting all over Diamond Tiara's pretty pink fur. "Better?"

Diamond sniffed once, biting back the cries the touch of alcohol prompted. "Yeah, I'm fine." She sat up and rubbed her forehooves together. "Thanks..."

"Now that's more like two little angels I thought you were." The voice seemed to be beside Diamond Tiara. "I'm going to assume you were lashing out in pain."

Diamond gave a little grunt. "We're not supposed to be here!"

"I should think not. No one should be here, least of all little pony foals. I thought if anyone came here, it would be an elderly griffon."

Silver tilted her head a little. "Why a griffon? Like, are we in the griffon kingdom?!"

"Why yes, yes you are. What a smart little foal you are, if a little oddly-shaped... Oh listen to me, now I'm the one being rude."

Diamond pointed at where the voice seemed to be coming from. "Who are you? And do you have any food? We didn't get a chance to eat before they threw us here."

"You shouldn't worry too much about me. Just be glad you're so young and innocent."

Silver swallowed heavily. "Oh, uh... So, like, what would you do if we weren't fillies?"

"I'd rather not say."

Diamond clopped a hoof on the ground. "About that food?"

"I'm afraid I have little use for such a thing. You'll have to go get it yourselves."

Silver frowned quizzically. "Where do we do that?"

"When the snow isn't coming down so hard, you should be able to find the trail. Just follow it, and don't get bitten again."

Diamond crossed her forelegs. "I didn't try to be bitten."

Silver set a hoof on Diamond's shoulder. "She knows that, but she's right, let's, like, not run into any more wolves."

A soft knocking came from the door, which turned quickly into a pounding. A hoarse voice called out, "Please! Please open the door!" It was male, and an adult by the sound of it. The room suddenly plunged into darkness.

The voice whispered in both of their ears. "Not for your eyes." And sleep came for them.

Diamond awoke first, rolling upright and blinking open her eyes before she shrieked with all the power that her little lungs could muster. Before her was a griffon, eviscerated and quartered. Each limb was tied up to the wall in a different part of the house, and his guts were hanging free of the stove that wasn't on anymore. The room was cold as death, and besides Diamond's screaming, nothing else disturbed the deadly scene.

Silver woke up quickly from the noise, only to join her friend with her shrill cry. She got to her hooves and staggered towards the door before her belly emptied itself on the floor, choking her cry with her own bile as she battled vainly to make sense of what she saw. Diamond rushed up to her and thrust her head under Silver, picking up the nauseous filly and bursting free of the hut. The door slammed shut behind them, and the lock engaged with a dull thud.

They had apparently spent the entire night in the hut; the sun was high enough to put it at early morning. The snow had stopped and the bitterest part of the chill had faded, though that still left it distressingly cold. Silver half-fell from Diamond Tiara, shuddering but smiling a little. "T-thanks. You saved me." She hugged Diamond tightly, drawing some measure of comfort from the physical presence of her. Diamond was too shocked to do much but accept it and try to calm the thundering of her heart.

The moment passed, and Diamond nudged Silver back. "Get it together. Look, there's the trail that spooky voice told us about." She pointed to a faint trail that wove through the trees, leading further into the valley. "I don't want to be here anymore."

Silver bobbed her head quickly. "Let's get out of here." She led the way in a semi-frantic scurry, and they were soon out of sight of the hut, both actively trying to forget what they saw inside.

"It's for the best," whispered the kindly old voice, far too far behind for either of them to hear. "My fury won't find any peace around you, little ones. Good luck."

An hour passed with little sound but their quiet panting and the crunch of snow under their hooves. Their legs felt sore, especially around those hooves, the cold biting at the sensitive flesh there. Silver Spoon took a moment to adjust her large glasses, thankful they had managed to not be damaged in all the commotion. "Do... Do you think it could follow us?"

Diamond glared at her friend, but the expression softened as she looked away. "I hope not. I don't think it wanted us. Look!" She trotted off the path and picked up a weathered but still intact longbow. "It's like from the Equestria games! But it's missing the spike on the bottom. Maybe it broke?"

Silver approached it with a ghost of a smile, thankful for the distraction. "Oh wow, it's a real bow. I never held one before. Can I see it?"

Diamond held it by the mouth towards Silver Spoon, who took it from her and sat down, trying to mime its use, but hooves were not quite suited for marksmanship, or marksponyship. "How does it work?"

Diamond rolled her eyes. "Well that's what you need the spike for. You have to get it standing up, then you can use it. And we need arrows, stupid."

Silver spoke around the bow she didn't seem willing to drop, "I'm not stupid. Just keep your eyes out for some arrows."

"Like these?" Diamond pointed to a quiver that rested not far from where the bow was. "I bet somepony lost both of them together."

Silver grinned triumphantly and set down the bow. She quickly snatched up the quiver and slung it over herself before picking up the bow again. She had no idea how to really use the bow, but she felt better for having it. "Like, how do I look?"

Diamond laughed softly. "You look like a little ranger, like Stallion Hood, Silver."

Silver put a hoof to a cheek. "Aw, thanks. We better get going. I don't want to spend a night out here." With some trial and error, Silver found a way to have the bow slung over herself and leave her mouth open, and the two proceeded down the trail.

The sun was starting to sag, and their entire bodies ached from navigating the mountain trails, but it all became worth it when they saw signs of life. Equally important was the fact that it was multiple signs. No lone cabin, instead a small village of houses and some surrounding farmland. No ponies were outside, not that either of the two could blame anypony for staying inside. They hurried their steps, coming into town with an almost drunken shuffle, tired and worn.

Diamond pointed to a large building with bright lights. "That place looks good." She hurried as quickly as she could and mouthed the handle. It wasn't locked, and she pushed the door open easily, allowing warmth to escape over her cooled form. A loud chorus of voices complained about the chill, and the two hurried inside and shut the door. There was a wall between them and the source of the voices, but they sounded alive, with bodies capable of complaining of the cold.

Diamond nodded at Silver. "Let me handle this. I'll have them eating out of the soles of our hooves." Silver nodded, and Diamond advanced, turning the corner to find a tavern room full of griffons. She hesitated a moment before scolding herself internally for being surprised. They were in the griffon kingdom, they were told this already. "Play it cool," she quietly whispered to herself before she gathered herself up to her full, if diminutive, height. "I am Diamond Tiara, and this is my servant, Silver Spoon. We require lodging and food until my father comes to fetch me, at which time you will be well paid!"

Several curious pairs of eyes settled on her. The bartender raised a brow. "And who's your father that we should give a feather about?"

Diamond Tiara pointed at herself with a confident smile. "My father is none other than Filthy Rich, of Ponyville." Where she expected to get service and awe, she got only blank looks and mild confusion.

"Never heard of it," said the bartender. "Are you lost? You're quite a bit away from the pony lands to be idly lost. Get out of the way of traffic and have a seat." He reached across the bar and pat a stool. "Share your story and I'll consider it a fair trade for a drink. I have a feeling it's a good one."

Silver hurried up to the bar and hopped up onto one of the stools, swinging herself left and right on it with a simple enjoyment of its ability to swivel. "You wouldn't believe, like, half the things we saw! Right, Diamond? We're lucky to be alive!"

Diamond took her time taking her own seat, mounting the stool with all the dignity she could muster. "It wasn't that bad, just a hungry ghost that tore apart a griffon twice our size. Nothing we couldn't handle."

Author's Note:

The duo finds civilization, and they aren't hostile on sight, that's definitely looking up! But how well will they get along with these griffons and convince them they're worth helping out?

Only the typos know.

Comments

[Istaran]

6161953
Got it. I hadn't read the previous story, so didn't know. Is an author's note called for? Your call. As a sequel, it's natural to be missing stuff if you don't read the previous stories.

[albedoequals1]

As time went on, the pain began to creep back in, and her flank stung with the ragged wound she had endured.

I suggest substituting "suffered" since she wasn't consciously toughing it out.

all over the pretty pink fur of Diamond Tiara.

"all over Diamond Tiara's pretty pink fur" would be a stronger construction.

Silver tilted her head a little. "Why a griffon? Like, are we in the griffon kingdom?!"

Oh, good. More free lore for me to exploit study.

What a smart little foal you are, if a little oddly shaped

oddly-shaped
Does that mean they stayed in their Equestrian form?

Before her was a griffon, eviscerated and quartered....

Holy sh--! You just went all Fallout on those kids. The ghost seemed so nice a minute ago. That's a heavy dose of perspective. I am not objecting, per se, but this is a somewhat different tone than the other two stories in the series. On the other hand, this might be just what those fillies need to grow them up in a hurry.

The reaction to it was well done. You conveyed a believable amount of fear and horror and showcased the difference in their personalities.

It was at least a day later. The sun was high enough to put it at early morning.

Your meaning would be more clear if you said something like, "They had apparently spent the entire night in the hut; the sun was high..."

Diamond laughed softly. "You look ridiculously cute, Silver."

Kids can't see cute. They try to look impressive or beautiful, but you can only appreciate cuteness in creatures smaller or younger than yourself.

[David Silver]

6165216 Many adjustments made, thanks!

[Alzrius]

"You look like a little ranger, like stallion hood, Silver."

Assuming that's the local version of Robin Hood, then the name should be capitalized.

I'll have them eating out of the soles of our hooves."

There are two spaces between "the" and "soles."

[Alzrius]

6165216

They try to look impressive or beautiful, but you can only appreciate cuteness in creatures smaller or younger than yourself.

I disagree with this, as this opinion is more than a guideline, rather than an inarguable fact.

As it stands, I'm not sure I would have kept that line anyway, simply because it's hard to imagine Diamond Tiara being nice, but that's something of a hurdle that we're going to have to overcome anyway, as having the spotlight for this fic means that we're going to have to see them in more phases of mood.

[David Silver]

6166945 Fixed!

[Alzrius]

So Diamond and Silver rest under the auspices of what seems like a kindly old ghost...only to see firsthand how it treats those that aren't little girls, sending them screaming back out into the cold.

Looking back over this chapter, what I'm struck most by is how little this encounter seems to contribute to the setup for the story as a whole, and I'm struggling to figure out why that is. To put it another way, this encounter with the haunted cabin seems like an isolated incident, at least taken unto itself, that has little impact on the larger story, and that rubs me the wrong way. Of course, Diamond Tiara was essentially "singing for their supper" by telling the tale, so it wasn't entirely pointless, but I do hope that the fallout from that encounter has more to it than just that (e.g. someone knew the missing griffon that was butchered, and wants them to lead the way back to the cabin).

I say that because narratively, a story is stronger if events happen in a sequence, with each one simultaneously being the effect of the previous encounter as well as the cause of the next one. This is a guideline, rather than a rule (everything doesn't need to be a direct consequence of what happened immediately before) but it's more expected during the beginning of a story, when everything is being setup for the narrative structure that is to follow. It might be good world-building to talk about how this area has a haunted cabin, but it's poor storytelling to have the characters stumble upon it, leave screaming, and then never return or speak of it again. Without a resolution, we can only assume that that plot-thread is still ongoing. If it has no greater impact, then it feels pointless.

Aside from that, the sudden change in tone here was gripping. The gory tenor caught me off-guard, despite the tag for this story, and did indeed serve to drive home that the girls aren't in Equestria anymore. Likewise unexpected was that the fillies ended up in the griffon kingdoms as well; that part wasn't something I'd anticipated. As it is, I'm curious as to what this means for their immediate future, since I don't have a very good handle on Everglow's griffons (though I seem to recall them as a gruff-but-noble people). As it is, the pair still don't seem to have realized that they're much further from home than they think, and so haven't started on their personal journeys yet...though the signs are there.

As it is, we are getting a better sense of how Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon relate, though mostly in terms of them falling back into their existing dynamic, something I suspect is simply out of familiarity more than anything else. Even after their fight, the two are falling back into the routine of Diamond being active and Silver being passive, to the point of Diamond calling Silver her servant when they arrived at that inn. Diamond clearly isn't comfortable with any other relationship, not just with Silver Spoon but with everyone; she quite clearly needs near-constant affirmation that she's worthwhile, and the only way she knows to get that is by making it clear that others are beneath her.

Silver Spoon, by contrast, seems entirely comfortable with who she is; that isn't to say that she's not selfish and self-indulgent, but she doesn't seem to have the self-esteem issues that Diamond Tiara has. Rather, I think that Silver Spoon's self-indulgence is her most defining characteristic. I see her as not caring about much else so long as she's pampered and enjoying the finer things in life, whether alone or with others. For her, being rich - and therefore comfortable - is an end unto itself. Diamond Tiara, by contrast, treats her money as another example of how she's better than everyone else.

Presuming I'm right about the two, that will make for an interesting tale of them adapting to harsher circumstances. Diamond Tiara is going to need to come to grips that she's not only not better than everybody, but in this world where strength is the most important thing, she's at the absolute bottom of the totem pole. Will that knowledge break her, or will she work to overcome her own weakness and make herself into a pony that can forcibly command respect from those around her? More than that, will she find strength enough to convince herself that she's worthwhile, and so won't need to keep picking on everyone around her?

By contrast, how will Silver Spoon react to a life of hardship? Will she hate having to work so much that she'll become more and more unhappy with a life that consists of toil and effort, or will she grow to empathize that others have to live much worse than she normally does, and want to help out?

The girls may be on Everglow now, but they've brought their own demons with them. Let's see if they can overcome them.

[David Silver]

6167028 They have quite a bit of adjusting to do, and, to make it clear, that was not the end of the cabin massacre. Do read on!

[Shadow Lance]

6167279 thy should be crapping them selfs, to think that if thy wheir older or a little ruder and thy would be renndered to bits and thy should be tramatised, but hay. thy are jerks. why cancle?

[Midknight Defender]

Like these?" Diamond pointed to a quarrel that rested not far from where the bow was. "I bet somepony lost both of them together."
Silver grinned triumphantly and set down the bow. She quickly snatched up the quarrel and slung it over herself before picking up the bow again. She had no idea how to really use the bow, but she felt better for having it. "Like, how do I look?"

Quiver? A quarrel is a bolt for a crossbow. A quiver holds arrows and can be so slung about oneself.

[David Silver]

7720711 Fix'd!