A simple engineering student goes to a convention as Raiden from Metal Gear Rising. While there, he buys the Murasama and ends up in Equestria during the Canterlot Wedding.
So instead of the MILES MORE INTERESTING Psychopathic Cyborg Ninja who has tons of baggage and problems yet to be solved, we're left with some no-name punk who's "personality" will probably be overridden by Raiden's own for no other reason than to throw him into Equestria with a sad excuse to give him Out of Character moments.
6433078 Perhaps if it wasn't so lazily executed and the beginning wasn't such an interchangeable prologue for 90 percent of this genre, then the negative backlash wouldn't prove so prevalent.
6433137 Yes, even I have to admit that people do tend to focus a bit on a 'copy and paste' attitude with these stories rather than making it their own.
All in all, I made this cause I was a bit stuck on my main story, Mind Over Magic, and that I was playing a ton of Metal Gear Rising, as I've said above. I'll probably only continue this when I've got writers block on Mind Over Magic.
Hm... following for now. My one nitpick is that I find it hard to believe that any sword or amor in Equestria could parry a High Frequency blade, much less the Murasama.
6496832 Unless said armor/weapons were enchanted for durability, or that he just isn't using his full strength. Raiden doesn't chop through people unless he is using Blade Mode or Ripper Mode, and I doubt that cyborgs are made of high-frequency metals. Unless I'm wrong, of course, then feel free to correct me.
6497204 I think he's able to activate it outside those modes via a trigger on the handle or something to that effect, but at current I doubt he'd be able to know/figure that out right now since he's still trying to get over his wtf.exe going off when he woke up. But truthfully i'm not quite sure about that.
6681137 In the next coming days I am going to put out a blog post. I'm putting all of my stories on an indefinite Hiatus while I work on a series that I can publish professionally.
6681297 I don't know if you understand. It could be years before I come back to my stories here on this site. I really want to get this other Universe I'm working on up and running. I want something that will help me in my future as a professional author.
A number of proofreading mistakes, and a glaring story mistake too: None of them good in a fight? The entire group fought off a sizable chunk of changeling soldiers on their own in the series. And they've gotten through the Everfree on their own and a large number of other threats. They're more than capable in a fight, even without professional training.
So instead of the MILES MORE INTERESTING Psychopathic Cyborg Ninja who has tons of baggage and problems yet to be solved, we're left with some no-name punk who's "personality" will probably be overridden by Raiden's own for no other reason than to throw him into Equestria with a sad excuse to give him Out of Character moments.
Prove me wrong:
i.imgur.com/5j6FMEM.png
ran out of original ideas so he stooped to actually writing a LoHAV
FTFY
....What is this nonsense....
An Equestrian Cyborg
You know, it's not terribly written, though it continues to surprise me how much people tend to despise this particular idea.
6433078
Perhaps if it wasn't so lazily executed and the beginning wasn't such an interchangeable prologue for 90 percent of this genre, then the negative backlash wouldn't prove so prevalent.
6433137 Yes, even I have to admit that people do tend to focus a bit on a 'copy and paste' attitude with these stories rather than making it their own.
6432912 I'll try.
6432970 I just honestly wanted to see how this was received. That, and I've been playing a ton of Metal Gear Rising.
6432973 Seriously?! I even searched it up to make sure it hadn't been done!
6433151 Did I copy past this overall?
All in all, I made this cause I was a bit stuck on my main story, Mind Over Magic, and that I was playing a ton of Metal Gear Rising, as I've said above. I'll probably only continue this when I've got writers block on Mind Over Magic.
RULES OF NATURE!!! haha can't help it!
6433865 It's a good song. I still prefer, 'A stranger I remain,' as my favorite song.
more plz
Definitely giving it a chance.
Oh author~! Ware are Scootaloo and Sweetie Bell at? They better be alright Quill, or you'll GET IT!!!
6482948 Jesus dude, I don't think I have it in me to actually hurt them.
Plus, I don't know how long it'll be until the next chapter, mostly cause I have two other stories to be working on.
Hm... following for now. My one nitpick is that I find it hard to believe that any sword or amor in Equestria could parry a High Frequency blade, much less the Murasama.
6496832 Unless said armor/weapons were enchanted for durability, or that he just isn't using his full strength. Raiden doesn't chop through people unless he is using Blade Mode or Ripper Mode, and I doubt that cyborgs are made of high-frequency metals. Unless I'm wrong, of course, then feel free to correct me.
6497204 I think he's able to activate it outside those modes via a trigger on the handle or something to that effect, but at current I doubt he'd be able to know/figure that out right now since he's still trying to get over his wtf.exe going off when he woke up. But truthfully i'm not quite sure about that.
6540489 That is another good idea. I might use that.
6540531 Happy to have been some assistance for ya
6540807 I'll be working on it over the week.
6541297 I hope I can live up to your expectations.
6541367 Still, I need this to be as good as it can possibly be.
6541613 Heh, thanks.
so far so good.
6435076 Its RED SUN where it is for me.
6541633 KO AWESOME hope there'll be some blood action and sword fighting as well. Hopefully the next chapter comes soon.
6541633 KO PLEASE say the next chapter is coming soon for more awesome action.
6681137 In the next coming days I am going to put out a blog post. I'm putting all of my stories on an indefinite Hiatus while I work on a series that I can publish professionally.
6681205 KO awesome I was worried for a sec so hope work on this when your free.
6681297 I don't know if you understand. It could be years before I come back to my stories here on this site. I really want to get this other Universe I'm working on up and running. I want something that will help me in my future as a professional author.
6681329 KO that's awesome your gonna do awesome in your life I'll try to be patient for as long as it takes.
6681345 Alright, don't say I didn't warn ya.
Also, what's with the KO in the beginning of each reply? I doubt you're saying Knock Out every time.
6681435 KO it's like my catchphrase just who I am I guess.
any more gonna be made?
A number of proofreading mistakes, and a glaring story mistake too: None of them good in a fight? The entire group fought off a sizable chunk of changeling soldiers on their own in the series. And they've gotten through the Everfree on their own and a large number of other threats. They're more than capable in a fight, even without professional training.