Chapter Una (Edited)
Whelp, I couldn't come up with anything significant to do with the Mane Six, no lessons anyway, so I decided just to mess with them, cause, you know, trolling.
"Well let's begin... shall we?" I said, before sinking into my shadow. After exploring the maze I found Fluttershy sneaking about. Grinning to myself, I hide in one of the... what do you call the walls of a hedge maze? I believe its just hedge, regardless when she walks, or rather, zoomed from cover to cove, past me, I jumped out in front of her and screamed.
"Surprise mother fu-". Kabong!!
‘OOOOOOWWWW! Okay, did not expect that reaction.' I thought, clutching my head. What was that reaction, I hear you ask? She bucked me, right in me noggin.
"Yeouch!" I shout "You know, for a timid type you sure carry a kick in your hooves!"
I hear Fluttershy gasp, before apologizing profusely. I guess she hadn't realiz- wait never mind she knows it’s me. "I’m Sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry!" she says repeatedly for several seconds nonstop.
Once she finally calms down a little, she gives me a stern look. "You should be ashamed of yourself! Scaring ponies like that!" Wow, first time talking to me and she's already scolding me.
"Oi! Theres no shame in scaring others!" I retort, then adding "So long as it doesn't seriously hurt or scar them.”
Then I remembered who I was talking to. "Hey wait, aren't you suppose to fear me? You know for being 'evil'?" I asked, bringing up my fore paws to do air quotes.
"Oh, I'm sure Discord used some sort of mind trick to make you evil, something as cute as you couldn't be evil willingly." She replies. Ah, naïve Fluttershy.
"Well, I'm not really on Discord's side, he’s more of a means to an end." I said. "Really, Celestia thought I was his ally because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. She made that assumption all by herself."
Her eyes widen. She wasn't expecting for Celestia to jump to conclusions. "That doesn't sound like Celestia at all..." She says. I sweat drop.
'Like you know her personally, miss 'Banish me to the Everfree Forest in a cage?' Oh yeah, I follow anime logic sometime "Well to be fair." 'And by that I mean poor excuse.' " She was younger,” 'If the lass ages at all.' “and... not sure if inexperienced is that right word, but she did make a mistake in imprisoning me."
"Oh wait, since your not evil, why not help us stop Discord?" She asked hopefully.
" Nah, I know you can do it by yourselves. Besides, I ain't done messing you with girls." I said. "See ya!" I jumped up, my legs straight and stiff with my paws flared out "MEEP MEEP!” I shout then ran off at speeds Rainbow would whistle at.
Not a logical choice? Well, I rather not interfere with important events...well not too much anyway.
----Time Skip-----
I continued running, before hitting the breaks and came to a screeching halt. Seeing AppleJack I hear her say " Ah was talking to uh... nopony, nopony what's so ever!" before she made a face that I could not describe well enough.
I ran up to her and whispered "You sit on a throne of lies..." ‘Gotta love ELF.’ Then I had to dodge a magic beam fired at me.
"Nope!" I said with a smug grin, my accent was a good old Texan cowboy. Twilight continued to fire at me, me moveing with unseeable speed, saying "Nope!' or "Nah!" or " I don't think soooooo!" Hm? Yes I know unseeable isn't a word. After a few seconds I disappeared from her point of view and onto the top of her head. I then began singing the troll song while doing a little dance.
She tried to shake me off. I picked her up over my head, belly up. "Hey put me down!" She said. "Be careful for what you wish for." I snarked, then frowned "Even though this doesn't count as 'putting you down'." Then I took a deep breath "JOHN CENA!!!!" I shout before smashing her into the ground, the music playing in the backround. The result was her laying on the ground with her eyes springing in a comical way.
Then I ran off laughing my head off like a jerk. Only to come at a abrupt stop as I smack into a pair of pink legs. I look up to see Pinkie's face, now in my face, beaming with excitement. Oh crap…
"Hi there! MynameisPinkiepiewhatsyourname,doyoulikeParties?Whatsyourfavoritecolor?WhyareyouDiscordsfriend?Howcanyoubreakthefouthwall?AND-" I shove my paw into her mouth.
"Shegorwrath, but just call me Shrio, my favorite color is blue, I'm not really Discord's friend, yes I like Parties, and I don't know how..." I deadpanned. She took a deep breath, which I interrupted by teleporting away from her. 'Yeah, no, I ain't dealing with her yet.' "Or rather Crimson Sun doesn't know how to write her...somehow." I snarked
*Oh shut up....*
* “You really should figure a way to write her, she’s kind of a main cast member.” *
* Ictus… get out. It’s one thing to invade a discussion in a forum, but it’s an entirely different thing to pop up in another author’s story while I’m editing it. *
* “Fiiiiiine, I’ll leave.” *
-----Time Skip-----
Rarity had just dug up the roc- excuse me 'Diamond'. After she finished rambling to herself to her, I jumped onto it wearing a cap backward, sunglasses and a gold necklace. I opened my mouth, then closed it. "Nah, this joke is WAY too obvious and easy to make." I threw my attar off. "Get off my diamond you demonic rodent of evil!" Rarity shouted...wow... "DAT'S RACIST!... I think." I shouted before running off.
------Time skip.....again-------
I fell asleep...how? I have no Idea...or how long. Well then. Anyways the maze had just burned down and Discord had just finish laughing his arse off. I jumped onto his shoulder as he stood up "Oh dear, my little ponies!" Someone, somewhere is saying 'He said it!!!'
"Did you fail? Oh no! Do you want me play a sad song with my miniature violin while you cry?" I fake pouted, rubbing my... uh the thumb of my paw with a finger, making a small noise.
[i* “It’s called a dewclaw dude.” *
]
* ICTUS!!! *
"This is no time for your stupid jokes!" Twilight snapped.
"No, seriously: look." I stated grabbing a magnifying glass and hovered it over my paw, revealing the miniature violin as I mentioned. Twilight glared at me with hate smoldering in her eyes. I merely smiled innocently."You weren't playing fair Disco-" "WELL DUH!" I interrupted her. "HELLO?! SPIRIT OF CHAOS!" I then face...pawed. "Seriously... and you’re supposed to be Celestia's student? Discord even said this was a trap! 'Twists and turns are my master plan.’ Rule numero uno, riddles NEVER have an obvious answer. Doesn't help you only listen to one part of the riddle......"
She paled at that. No offense to any Twilight fans, but she isn't really that smart, as apparently she never heard how the scientific method works...*Cough* Feeling Pinkie Keen *cough*. Then I felt the need to sing. Oh did I forget to mention I LOVE to sing? Well I did just that, though it didn't match the situation. Like at all. Why am I doing it? Because I can! (AN: I leave you to imagine the events during the song, cuz I'm lazy... Next one I will force myself to write them though.)
After the song ended, each of the mane six look at me with different reactions. Twilight with slight fear because of the contexts of the song, Fluttershy was the complete opposite, she was snickering. Pinkie Pie just yelled "I HATE SINGING!" To which I responded by slapping her with a raw fish. And Applejack and Rarity were still fighting...
A few seconds of silence. "Welp, I got nothing else to say, sooooo toodles!" I say. I put on a size XXXL propeller beanie, give it a quick spin, and I am now flying through the air faster then the speed of sound...without breaking the sound barrier. Physics? What's that?
-----Timey Skippy------
So, since I ran out of things to do with the mane six, I decided to explore the EverFree forest. Yeah, I know all the monsters are there, but they don't stand a chance against a reality-warper.
So, anyways, I'm just skipping on the forest floor, humming a little tune. A Chimera had earlier tried to make me its dinner, but I just tied it's snake tail around its legs to trip it up.
I jump off a cliff, yes a cliff, and land perfectly... on something squishy... that made a "Oof!" noise. Looking down, my eyes widen to see a------.
"Really? A cliffhanger dude?"
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Mm, I don't know why, but I like this story.
About the editor, maybe one will appear when your story gets longer? Some people tend to only take notice of longer stories.
6895983
Surprise SupriseKitty! I'm the new editor!!!!!!
Try the looking for edditors group.
Till then just use a edditing prossesor in word and have a english tuttor read over it.
6920996 so hows the next chapter?
6941437
It's pretty good. Filled with comedy as always, not gonna spoil anything else. Crimsoin PMed me that he's going to be unavailable for a while so I have some time before he needs the edited version. Just hang tight.
6941437
Oh wait, it says he was on 8 hours ago, never mind! I should probably start working on it. Recently got another chapter out for my story so haven't had the time to do it yet.
6941458 ...
double time soldier!
6941458 My grandparents got internet about two weeks ago, go figure right?
6944326
Yep. Also, chapter's done.
hah i get the cliff hanger joke
physics is your great great great not great great great grandpa mother
He landed on a cliffhanger?!
That's what I call an interesting ending! 
I wonder how soft and fluffy a cliffhanger is.
While I think they sometimes explain it with good enough reasons, that mostly looks like some kind of excuse to let the character avoid an important event.
I'm never sure if they just think it would be to difficult to write such a scene or not but I never thought there was not a good reason to let the character help, and not be completely beaten up by everything. I mean in games or whatever there are several characters that aren'T special, but still manage to beaten an awesome Villain.
What I mean to say is, I hope if he is going to be a good guy, that he isn't that kind of main char, that is trying to avoid "messing with the destiny of the world", or some stupid stuff like that. For some characters that actually makes sense, I admit that much. However sometimes it just makes it boring.
I like this character, even if I get the feeling he is trying that hard to be funny, that he is not really being funny. Either that, or I just don't understand those jokes, or I don't translate that good enough.
fourth wall breaking is fine, but I never liked the talking with the author kind of fourth wall breaking.
I can't decide if I should think he could just have been Screwball or not, but sometimes it's weird to have different characters with kind off the same abilitys like Discord.
Anyone want to play pokemon I have this new card I want to try
mypokecard.com/en/Gallery/my/galery/PAUc9559ln6T.jpg
How the fuck do you say "Nope" with a Texan accent?
7794060 The engineer.tf2.