The Lost Wonderbolts

by FireFlash13231

Prologue: Captured

Rainbow Dash and I have been best friends since we were only filly and colt. We played together all the time, had adventures, everything that best friends do. One fateful day, everything changed.

When I passed the entrance exam for the Wonderbolts, unfortunately, Rainbow didn't pass. I was so sorry that my best friend couldn't join with me, and I made it clear to her that being in the Wonderbolts without her was nowhere near as much fun as not being in the Wonderbolts and hanging out with her.

Time passed, and I realized that we were still best friends, and that nothing, not even one of us achieveng our life's dream and the other being left out, could break that friendship.

I had an idea. I would train her, and beg the Wonderbolts' captain, Spitfire, to give her a second attempt at the entrance exam. After almost a year of training, I was convinced that my best friend in Equestria, Rainbow Dash, would easily make the cut.

About a week before the exam, Spitfire and Soarin disappeared. They were two of the three judges for the exam entrants, and everypony wondered what had happened. Due to the fact that we were already short on performers for the next show, on the same date as the exam, no more flyers could be spared to judge the exam, and it had to be postponed.

At this point I should have become suspicious, as I was forced to stop helping Rainbow prepare in order to look for Spitfire and Soarin with the rest of the Wonderbolts, hopefully in order to find them before the date of the exam.

One day, I was looking for Spitfire and Soarin, when I was attacked from behind. I was bucked in the head, and I fell to the ground, unconscious.

When I woke up, I was blindfolded, gagged, and had my wings bound to my side. I removed the blindfold, and immediately realized that it was extremely dark. I looked around, but I could not tell where I was. I assumed that I was in a cave, as the floor and walls were rocky and rough.

It took almost ten minutes for me to remove the rope binding my wings. I had to admit, whoever threw me in here knew how to tie knots. I traced the cave wall with my hoof, and it took under a minute for me to find what I was looking for.

"I thought so..." I said aloud. "Magic..."

There was an exit, and it had been sealed with magic. I may be a pegasus, but years of hanging with Twilight Sparkle had taught me that you didn't need to be a unicorn to detect traces of magic.

I tried to escape with a sonic flameboom, but it was no use. There was not enough space to accelerate. I was trapped.

Comments

[Brawney Hooves]

On the short side, but interesting.

[SpikedPunch]

I hope you don't mind but ill be commenting on mistakes, problems and generally anything that may bother myself or some other readers. first off your spelling, though i only read through without scouring it, seems pretty good , you re-use certain words a fair bit such as "I" and i noticed you went from referring of the narrator (clearly a friend of dash's) to rainbow herself? unless you intend on later explaining why her friend is also able to do a sonic rainboom, which i am pretty sure only rainbowdash can preform, thought this last thing isent the biggest deal some spacing between paragraphs would be fantastic, to help keep what line your on as-well as clearing any confusion, your grammer could use a little help, but only with how it flows, past that its satisfactory.

past that its a pretty good start my friend!

[Church]

A sonic flameboom...

I have officially seen and heard everything now. Life is complete.

[Scarlet Key]

pacing is just a teeny, tiny bit off.
OK, it's a long way off. like the first chapter of my fic, we have next to no time to get to know this OC. Who is he? What is his Cutie Mark? What is his personality? and; WTF Is the Sonic FlameBoom?
Just, you know, a few miner problems...