True Story

by Eyeswirl the Weirded

Chapter 10: All He Said Was That It Probably Ran In The Family

After recovering her hat and making her way to Golden Oaks Library, Rarity very carefully timed her approach for a moment in which nopony was watching. None of the windows were open and the angle from which she closed in was away from the front door, but noticing a balcony sticking out around the back of the buildi-... tree, she managed to jump, kick off the side of the trunk, and hop over the railing with the help of a Feather Weight spell.

She had that spell because it helped lift heavy supplies for her shop, not because it made her weigh less when cast on herself. The spell didn't even make living targets look thinner anyway, so there!

Luckily for her, the door up there wasn't locked, so she was free to waltz right in. She had never been past the front room of Golden Oaks, so she wasn't exactly sure where to go, but the voices from the nearby corridor quickly led her to that very place. Maybe she could have come in through the front door, but more pressing was the tumult she walked in on.

"-all four stacks," Lightning Dust complained with narrowed eyes to an equally annoyed Thunderlane, "double-checked, by myself!"

"You were the one that said you were sooo focused, that you could get it all done in half the time we would!"

"That was Rainbow, putting words in my mouth!"

"Words you completely agreed with!"

"...Y-yea, but..." Lightning blushed. "Well I was right anyway!"

"Then what's the problem?!"

"YOUR FACE!!"

"Not in the face, notintheface," cried Soarin, fleeing a furious Shining Armor, "I need it for quite a few things!"

"You'll heal!"

"Oh, c'mon, I told you I was just kidding about your kid sister! Can't you take a joke?!"

"GRRRR!!"

They ran past Blueblood, Big Mac, and Pinkie, who had a vase stuck on her head.

"My first solution would be to teleport her somewhere," mused Blueblood, "but pressed that tightly against her skin, the vase might come with her anyway and... well, let's just say you don't want to know how that could potentially make things worse."

Big Mac raised an eyebrow. "Just how safe is that spell?"

"It has more to do with how much practice one has casting it on other pon-"

Rarity startled the room with a loud, flashy (but short-lived, so as to be safe indoors) firework spell she'd once used for a fashion show. When she had their attention, she raised an eyebrow. "This is all going toward dismantling those rumors, I hope?" Some uncertain looks were exchanged, but before she could properly ask just what the hay was going on, Doctor burst in with a large tub of margarine tucked under one leg.

"I have acquired butter!"

Pinkie, head still stuck in the vase, let out a muffled cheer.

"What the hay is-" Rarity stopped and cleared her throat. "I mean, excuse me, but could anypony be so kind as to explain the situation here?"

"Uhh... well," started Lightning Dust, "Doctor led me and Pinkie here, where Mac, Armor," her voice took on a fleeting note of annoyance, "Thunderlane, and Soarin were already waiting, Blueblood showed up right after we got done telling the rest that we were here to help, so we did that part again, Pinkie was like-"

"Crl mh Phnkh!"

"Yea, and she started singing a song and-"

Doctor, setting the margarine on the floor near Pinkie, raised an eyebrow. "I thought the singing came after the vase?"

Soarin scratched his head. "I think it fell after and/or during the song, right around the time Shining started-OW!" Rubbing his freshly-punched foreleg, he scowled at Shining Armor. "Yeesh, I said I was kidding."

Shining nodded. "And I said I'd smack you if you said another word about her, which you did after the vase fell."

"I think that sounds about right," mused Thunderlane as he looked upwards, "but where did the vase come from?"

Blueblood touched a hoof to his chin in thought. "You know, now that you mention it, that might be the vase that went missing during our practice with levitation spells about a week ag-"

"ENOUGH," screeched Rarity, again startling the room into silence. She rubbed her temples. "There are enough confusing stories going around as it is, so can we please, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease, just get on with this?"

Pinkie popped the vase right off her head, smiling. "Sure thing, Rari-bear! And I think I've got just the plan! For real this time!"

As she rubbed her forehooves together in faintly sinister fashion, Doctor glanced at the tub by Pinkie's hooves. "So, do you still need this butter, or...?"

"Yes, actually!"

---

Late that afternoon...

---

"So," Lily thought aloud as she took in the scene, "where do you think Pinkie gets the budget for these things?"

Rose took a cautious look around. "There are things sane ponies don't think about, 'Lil."

Before them was a stage not unlike that of The Great and Powerful Trixie, who'd visited town a while back for a short, but flashy magic show before helping herself to one of the local stallions. There didn't seem to be any wagon attached or fireworks going off, but it was a stage, complete with seating arrangements of which they were presently making use, and a popcorn stand, at which stood Doctor. Maybe that was what he did for a living. All around them, ponies shuffled in, finding somewhere to sit while a friend brought them-

"Popcorn!" declared Daisy, startling her friends again. "Nice and buttery! By the way, either of you have a clue what all this is about?"

"N-no," answered Lily as Daisy sat with them, "do you?"

"Nope, but knowing Pinkie, I'm sure it'll be something fun!"

She took the first bite of popcorn when a big, pink smoke cloud burst into existence on stage, but nothing happened when it cleared. Then Pinkie galloped up onto the stage to stand where the smoke cloud had been, wearing a yellow, pointy hat and cape covered with smiley faces. She addressed the crowd with a slightly sheepish smile.

"Ta-daaaa...?" There were giggles, which made her giggle too. "Thanks for coming out, everypony! You all remember Trixie the Stage Magician coming to Ponyville, right? Well, I didn't while I was writing that flyer, so I sorta left that out, but it was totally a neat thing that happened! So much so that I wanted to do a show of my own, which is what we're doing now, as soon as I stop telling you about it and actually do it, Pinkie stop reading the cue cards and just do the-oh, right!"

A few ponies turned around, but nopony was there. In a newly-ruffled cloud overlooking the stage, Lightning Dust sighed with relief. She said that last cue card was a dumb idea, but not because she thought Pinkie would read it out loud!

"For my first trick," Pinkie announced while pulling a rubber chicken out of her hat, "balloon animals!" Eyebrows were raised and heads were tilted, but she held the beak of the polymer avian to her lips, blew into it until it inflated to four times its normal size, tightly tied a string around its neck, and held it, floating, for all to see. "Ta-daaa!"

---

"-and that's when the ice cream pony showed up! It was-"

Moondancer's smile vanished as she stopped dead, her eyes went wide, and a shiver ran up her spine. Sunset Shimmer and Twilight Sparkle shared a glance before the latter raised an eyebrow.

"Umm... Moondancer? You okay?"

"I, yea, just... I felt, a disturbance. As though somepony were enacting motions with their lips and mouth upon a vague representation of a certain piece of anatomy and making it bigger in the wrongest way possible."

"...Well," Sunset huffed as she returned to her book, "don't make a habit of it."

"'Kay!"

---

There was some applause amid the bewildered stares, Lily tilting her head. "D-don't balloons need helium to-"

Rose cut her off. "There things sane ponies don't think about, 'Lil."

Then, Pinkie pulled a big, bouncy ball out from under her cape, holding it against the floor with one hoof. "For my next trick, I'll balance on this ball, juggle another, tinier ball, a bowling pin, and a little pony puppet while drinking a glass of water!" She procured these items from a table nopony was sure had been there a second ago.

Having pulled off some sleight of hoof and the art of misdirection in a manner Hoofdini would be proud of, unseen ponies bumped hooves backstage.

Pinkie gathered up the items, balanced the glass of water on the tip of her snout, hopped onto the bigger ball while only spilling a few drops, started passing the smaller ball, bowling pin, and puppet between one front and hind hoof (which by itself drew some applause), picked up the glass from her snout with her free front hoof, and took a long drink! Ponies cheered, but just before she finished the glass, her balance on the bigger ball slipped, which she rapidly shifted to regain, shifted too far in one direction, and started undulating back and forth to stay up. In the blink of an eye, she angled the hind hoof she'd been using to juggle for a kick to launch the ball clear over the seated ponies, way over to the fountain at which the real show was about to start!

Ponies' eyes followed the ball as Pinkie came to rest on all four hooves, having slipped off the bigger ball and caught everything but the bowling pin (stee-rike?) as she stared after the ball with an intrigued look on her face just in case anypony was still looking at her.

Near the fountain, Blueblood stood in his finest tuxedo, carrying a bouquet of flowers. In front of him was Rarity, wearing a very nice dress and fanning herself with an ornately-decorated... well, fan.

"Miss Rarity," Blueblood began very loudly and boldly, "I've had a lot of time to think about the day we met, and I feel I must apologize for my behavior that day. Can you forgive me?"

Rarity answered at equally audible tones, internally giddy to be acting out a scene like this with an audience and everything. A lady maintained her composure, however. "Yes, for I was truly no better, Mr. Blueblood. Even so, I have had just as much time to consider what was said that day, and I'm afraid I must apologize twice. I do regret my own actions that day, but the two of us could never be together, as we're simply not each others' types."

Not looking at the crowd, Blueblood nodded. "Though I had hoped otherwise, with things being what they are, I must concur. Even so, please know that I bear you no ill will for the whole of the incident."

The stage smile wasn't hard to make, the hard part was keeping it down to normal, civilized levels as she heard the gasps of several onlookers. "Nor I you, and I'm sure that at the least, we can be good friends."

With that, the two of them turned and walked away, Blueblood casually chucking the flowers away...

...over the crowd, towards the stage, where they landed at Pinkie's hooves. Many of those watching gasped again, whispering to each other.

"Omigosh, did you see that?!"

"He threw them right at her!"

"You think it was on purpose?"

"Totally, he must be interested in-"

Pinkie looked at the flowers, picked them up, and took a bite, silencing the largely incredulous audience as they watched her chew the romantic gesture to pieces. "Thish's good! Nhnypony wahnsum?"

Many in the crowd gave Pinkie deadpan stares, sighed, and went home, their budding dreams of another wild mystery romance crushed.

---

A few days later, Pinkie, Lightning, Rarity, and the six secret Element Bearers had again gathered in the relative privacy of Golden Oaks.

Rarity sighed blissfully. "I can't tell you how good it is to be able to talk with ponies normally again."

That's not the only thing you're not telling us, Lighting thought to herself. Not that she cared. At all.

"Well," chuckled Soarin, "most of sorta know already, but it's great that the rumors died down after that little routine."

"Granted," Thunderlane said uncertainly, "they're kinda still going, but at least now the whole thing's been boiled down to an on-and-off joke."

Blueblood scratched his chin. "I wasn't sure it would work, but it seems vaguely outlining what 'happened' and telling any who asked that we didn't wish to discuss it further did the trick."

Doctor, as ever, smiled. "Apart from the occasional good-humored speculation?"

"Apart from those, yes." He took a sip of tea during the sustained silence that followed.

"...Sorr-"

The entire table looked at Shining Armor. "Please stop apologizing!!"

An awkward silence followed, Blueblood cleared his throat. "So, I've been meaning to ask, Miss Rarity, but your place of business caters to more than mares looking for something to wear to a party, correct?"

"Er, yes?"

"Well..." He brushed his neck self-consciously. "I happen to be a connoisseur of tasteful attire, and while your style, the subtle use of complimentary colors integrated with materials of the right texture to bring out those hues, is something I haven't seen in Canterlot, or even Manehattan, I've refrained from stopping by on account of this spat of ours."

Fashion senses tingling as though they'd caught fire, Rarity's eyes widened. "P...Prince Blueblood...?"

"I haven't had any trouble with ordering suits from elsewhere, but the time and cost of delivery have never been a high point of pretending your shop didn't exist. And, our recent performance may look suspicious if I were to continue to do so. That is to say, if you have no objections to the venture, then-" Her increasingly wide, manic grin and bright, sparkling eyes made him regret this line of thought, but thankfully she was only the 'happy' kind of insane.

"Waa-haa-haa-haa!! I'd be more than happy to make you a suit," she declared, speaking quickly," and I mean make one for you to wear, not skin you and- well, I think we're past all that now, and more importantly, I don't get asked to make suits very often so I have all these ideas I've wanted to try and-" Across the table, Pinkie smiled with some kind of pride as Rarity descended into borderline chipmunk-babble. "if you come by often I might even be able to do them all and get new ideas for corrections next time and I can only imagine what having not just a bonafide Canterlot Elite, but Celestia's own nephew wearing my designs would do for my career, so I can hardly wait to work together!!"

Having heard the middle part there, Lightning whispered to Thunderlane. "Isn't she kind of using him now?"

Thunderlane scratched his head. "Uh... Well, maybe, kind of, a little bit, but it works out for both of them, so just let her have this one, okay?"

"Eh, whatever."

"If you wouldn't mind," continued Prince, "we could (platontically) meet up for breakfast some time to discuss payment."

Rarity blinked twice, her head tilting. "Huh? Paymen-Oh!" She smiled brightly. "Yes, of course!"

I'll be getting paid for this too?!

It hadn't occurred to her that this would be anything akin to a regular business transaction, that she'd be doing anything less than making a free suit that a very (socially) high-ranking pony would be wearing, because it seemed like a friendly thing to do and putting a price tag on an olive branch was never in good taste. Then again, as he was undoubtedly rich and her kitchen could use some renovating after Sweetie Belle's recent cooking lessons (Rarity would not be blamed for toxic toast again), what was the harm? She glanced at Pinkie Pie, wondering if it would be worth the risks of a whole new batch of rumors if she kissed her full on the mouth for getting things to this point.

Of course, then I might have to kiss everypony else here. Perhaps gift baskets or something would be suitable?

"I'd have gone to order one for him," Shining said uncertainly, "but I couldn't shake the feeling that it'd be some kind of betrayal, so... Sorry we weren't giving you any business in all that t-" Many flat looks, including Pinkie holding a piece of cardboard in front of her face, halted the line of thought. "Alright, alright, I'll stop!"

Things were going a little too well for her already, but sometimes, a lady dared press her luck. "On that note, I don't suppose I could interest the rest of you in new outfits? There is the upcoming Centennial Meteor Shower and it wouldn't hurt to have something nice for the outdoor dance." With the dearth of young, unmarried stallions in this town, the lonelier mares will certainly thank me if I can get a few more looking presentable for the evening. Pinkie and Miss Dust could probably stand for makeovers as well.

There were some uncertain noises from the rest, bar the happily nodding party pony, but maybe she could talk to each of them later. Starting with the one that had just vaguely expressed interest. "What about you, Mr. Armor? Perhaps you could do with a well-tailored outfit yourself?"

He scratched his head. "Well, there is this party in Canterlot in a couple weeks, and if I'm going as a bodygu-I mean, assistant, I should probably dress for it."

She smiled. "I'm sure it would make somepony very happy to see you all prim and proper for the occasion."

"Ugh, no kidding" Shining said with an eye-roll, pointing at Blueblood, "he's always complaining about my 'pitifully limited wardrobe!'"

"Well it is," Blueblood muttered under his breath.

Rarity stayed the course. "...Rrrrright, but, I'm sure there's a very important mare that would appreciate it."

"Nah, Twily doesn't even think about fashion."

Her eyes widened. "'T-Twily'?"

The entire rest of the table (even Pinkie, just to fit in), answered in a tired monotone, their faces completely deadpan as they spoke in unison. "Twilight Sparkle, his precious, perfect, LSBFF, Princess Celestia's prized student and the best, cutest little sister ever."

Shining rolled his eyes, secretly glad they remembered all the details that time.

Sister, hm? Alright, there's still hope. "Right, right, your little sister... But, surely there's at least one other mare of note?"

He paused, visibly searching his memory. "Well..."

All present held their breath.

"Now that you mention it..."

Their gazes were firmly locked on Shining Armor, waiting in silent anticipation to see if he was about to herald The End Times by showing attraction of any kind to a mare other than his sister.

"My mother is always happy to see me in the officer uniform!"

Groans were heard, faces were hooved, and curses were muttered under breaths as the rest of the room shared a thought.

He's completely hopeless!

Sighing, Rarity sipped her tea. Sorry, Fluttershy, I tried.

Not long after, the group dispersed, with Pinkie just a little disappointed that she was barred from throwing a We Totally Fooled 'Em, Guys party on the grounds that it would kind of give it away. Not even a quiet party (PINKIE COULD TOTALLY DO QUIET!!) just for the nine of them! Still, this wasn't a bad thing, because the rumors were pretty much dried up, everything was fine, and everypony was happy, so she could at least go home in peace.

Of course, she thought when she got back to her room and sat on her bed, Bluie and Rarity are still a little awkward around each other, at least when they aren't talking about fancy clothes, but at least they aren't screw-you-forever-I-hate-your-stupid-face enemies anymore. Shiny's totally awkward too sometimes, and he still has plenty of friends!

She was sure it would work out. Maybe. Probably.

Idly looking around the room, she caught sight of the single, purple rose she kept from that tasty bouquet, sitting in a little vase on her window sill. Maybe she could have just planted it somewhere, but then the vase would be empty and she wouldn't have any mementos of the vase-stuck-on-her-face, flower-chomping resolution to that serious problem! She didn't always keep things to remember things happening, but her usual method of taking pictures was harshly vetoed this time for 'evidence' reasons. But nobody would suspect a flower!

Giggling, she flopped down on her bed, smiling at that flower as she drifted off to sleep.

Author's Note:

Who specifically pulled off the table trick when nopony was looking, I leave to your imagination.

Comments

[The Great Derpsby]

That was adorable.

Wait... it still doesn't say 'complete'! There might be more!

[Eyeswirl the Weirded]

7720125
Just a few bonus chapters, as I'm vaguely certain is Stallionverse tradition. Like someone getting a slapstick head injury in the first chapter.

[Mix-up]

great to see an other chapter of this great story, I hope to see the next chapter soon.

[RadicalDishonesty]

And thus, a friendship was struck between those that once hated each other.

I imagine many days of happy friendship ahead of them.

Possibly silly occasionally-tense friendship with some workable differences, but overall happy.

[Dorath]

"...Well," Sunset huffed as she returned to her book, "don't make a habit of it."
"'Kay!"

Groans were heard, faces were hooved, and curses were muttered under breaths as the rest of the room shared a thought.
He's completely hopeless!
Sighing, Rarity sipped her tea. Sorry, Fluttershy, I tried.

Don't give up hope, Flutters! (You're only competing with Moondancer, Cadance, and who knows how many other mares ...)

[ShadowLDrago]

She had that spell because it helped lift heavy supplies for her shop, not because it made her weigh less when cast on herself. The spell didn't even make living targets look thinner anyway, so there!

I believe you.

"My mother is always happy to see me in the officer uniform!"
Groans were heard, faces were hooved, and curses were muttered under breaths as the rest of the room shared a thought.

This guy is DENSE.

[Emperor]

Shining Armor is hopeless. The only chance the citizens of Ponyville have to set him up is for Moondancer to continue perverting Twilight until Twi's into incest

Pinkie seems to have had a deft hoof in setting things up. Hopefully that flower doesn't rot on her soon

[dshadow14]

"I, yea, just... I felt, a disturbance. As though somepony were enacting motions with their lips and mouth upon a vague representation of a certain piece of anatomy and making it bigger in the wrongest way possible."

Darn it, Moondancer, if you didn't say anything I wouldn't have made that connection. Now I'll never look at Boneless the same way again.