Chapter Four: Fun With Blocks
My turn? Okay.
Alright, I'll admit, I was a little embarrassed by how I acted when I was confronted by the possibility of new 'lore' to examine. Some guys don't care about that kind of thing, and just blast through it. Me? I read every bit that I come across. I take notes, and see how different bits of history come together. Part of it is practical: Sometimes, hidden in the lore, is an easter egg that might lead you to a secret you might otherwise miss. Other times, it's just fun to read. I, on my own, compiled all of the lore in Demon Souls, Dark Souls, and Dark Souls 2, and put it all together into a comprehensive narrative. I think I posted it online a couple of times. Ah, but I may be getting off track. Moving on!
The next stairway down was shorter than the last one, and when we reached the bottom of the staircase, I waited until after Elizabeth had entered the room, and made certain that I kept myself right by her side. See, I was paying attention to that 'map' earlier, and I knew what was coming.
"Sweet zombie Cthulhu on a crutch, I love these things," I blurted out, unable to contain my enthusiasm. The room we had just entered contained a sliding block puzzle.
I freakin' love sliding block puzzles. I mean, seriously, I absolutely adore them. One of the first games I ever played was The Adventures Of Lolo on my dad's Nintendo Entertainment System, and I've loved games that involve moving blocks around ever since. I mean, they're not the only kind of puzzle that I enjoy, but they are right near the top of the list...
The room itself was square shaped, and looked much like the rest of the dungeon had, thus far: Gray stone blocks, almost sterile in their cleanliness, were visible, and unlike the previously room, and the staircases that we had descended, this room was lit be eight bright blue torches, four at the corners, and four at the midpoint of each wall. In addition, there was a massive blue crystal in the ceiling which caught the light and reflected it all about the room. The effect was a room that was as brightly lit as a sunny day. Unlike the previous room, I could have zipped about easily without having left Elizabeth alone in the dark.
Have I mentioned how sorry I am that I did that, sweetie? I'm really sorry about it. I just wasn't thinking. Aww, thanks, hun...
Anyways, moving on!
Liz turned towards me, seeming a little confused, and asked, "Love what things?"
I cleared my throat, reigned in my enthusiasm, and said, "What we have before us now, I believe, is a sliding block puzzle." Looking over at the door, clearly barred with a complex mechanism, on the other side of the room, then shining my beam of light on it to make sure she noticed it, I said, "It's a classic puzzle lock: The door won't open until we solve the puzzle."
"Why would someone set up something like that?" Confused, I looked over at the changeling, as she continued, stating, "Wouldn't it make more sense to use a lock and key?"
"Admittedly, you have a point," I said, then shone the light around the room. "But only if you wanted to make sure that no one ever came in here. If you only wanted someone who was 'worthy' to enter, though, then you would instead set up a series of tests that had to be overcome to reach the goal. If the builders of this place were creatures who prided themselves on strength, then we'd likely be made to fight monsters, or move heavy weights, or something like that. However, since the builders were likely descended from foxes..." I left it hanging, to see if the 'AI' would pick up the hint I gave her.
I was not disappointed: She immediately said, "Foxes are known to be nimble and clever. So... the tests will be about wits, about speed and agility?"
Pleased that she was able to work it out on her own, I said, "Precisely. The last wish of this wishing star was intended to go to the foxiest of foxes, someone who would be smart enough to use this wish wisely. Keys may be stolen, and locks might be picked. However, a door that can only be opened by the keenest of minds is certain to bar all save the one meant to come here."
"Right," Elizabeth said, seeming a a little worried. "But, um... these blocks look heavy. Too heavy for me to move, in fact, so, um..."
The blocks in question did, in fact, look heavy. Heavy as fuck, in fact. Each one seemed to be made of soild stone, and was a perfect cube as tall as Liz was standing on her back legs. They would obviously be too heavy for her to be expected to move, normally, but I noted that each one was marked by some sort of a button on each side. "Right. Try pressing that button on the side of the cube," I said, using the light to highlight one of the blocks. "While you do that, I'll go up and get a bird's eye view of the area."
"Alright," she said without hesitation. While she advanced on the block, I rose up, so that I could get a better look at the surroundings. As I expected, the room was divided into a seven by seven grid, with large floor tiles, each one the size of one of the puzzle blocks. The tiles in the middle of the grid, for a five by five area, were white. The tiles that surrounded that area were grey, and the tiles around that area were black. My suspicion was that the blocks would only move around the white area, but Liz would be able to go as far as the gray area, so she could manipulate the blocks from all sides, no matter where they went. It she stepped on the black...
I suspected that would be a reset flag, causing all the blocks to revert to their original position. That way, if someone were trying, and made a critical mistake (Such as, say, place four of the blocks in a square, rendering them impossible to move), there would be a way to undo that mistake.
I did note, however, that the tiles in each of the corners of the white area, and one in the middle, were glowing. Five blocks were scattered around the white tiled area. To me, the goal was obvious. I began plotting out the proper solution for the puzzle, and had an answer in seconds.
Calling down from above, I shouted, "Can you hear me!?"
Liz, almost to the block, winced, covering her ears, and said, "You didn't have to shout, I can hear... you..." Looking up, she asked, "How can I hear you so clearly when you're way up there?"
"Not sure. Maybe my words are being transmitted directly into your brain?" I was... surprised by that. This was the second time that the character in the game had commented about the weirdness of the game. The penny that we all know would eventually drop was scooting a little closer to the edge from which it would fall.
"That's... a little creepy," Elizabeth said, then after a moment added, "But I won't look a gift horse in the mouth. Just try not to shout again." Looking at the button, she asked, "What do you expect will happen when I press the button?"
Smart girl. In her position, I'd ask the same question. "I expect the block will move one space, or maybe from there until it reaches the end of the white tiles on the floor. Like I said before, wits and agility, not strength."
"White tiles?" I saw her look down and study the design of the floor. "Oh. Huh, why are those tiles... Oh! Oh, I get it! We're supposed to move these blocks to where they're over the glowing spots on the floor!" Eying the boundaries, she added, "But what are those gray and black tiles about?"
"I think that the grays are for how far you can move, so you can move a block, even if it is at the boundary of the white tiles. The black tiles, I suspect, mark a threshold: If you cross it, the puzzle will probably reset, and you'll have to start over. We can test that, if you like...?"
"I'd rather not, in case it does something... worse," she admitted, then said, "Alright, here goes. Let's see what happens." She pressed the button, and...
Okay, even I wasn't ready for what happened next. The block began shaking, and... it shot across the field so quickly that I was surprised that it didn't break the sound barrier. It was like seeing a startled cockroach run: There was no steady acceleration, no build up before it reached top speed, just an instant transition from still to maximum, and then back again.
"Celestia's rose-scented dung," Elizabeth whispered, her eyes wide in amazement.
"Holy shit," I whispered myself, my jaw dropping. Unlike most games, the attention to detail in this game gave me a more... visceral feeling for just how solid that block was, and how fast it was moving. Think about this for a moment: How heavy would a six by six by six cube of granite weigh? A couple tons, maybe? More? I don't know, I'd have to look it up. Obviously, more than an ordinary person could hope to move. But that thing had just taken off like it had been launched from a cannon.
If anyone or anything had been sitting between that block and its destination, then it would not simply have been hurt, it would have been destroyed. A living body, hit with that much mass, going that fast...
Yeah, it would practically liquify anyone unfortunate enough to be in the way. There wouldn't likely be enough left of them to send home to their mother in a jelly jar.
I reminded myself that this was just a puzzle game, rather than a fighting game or anything of that nature. I wasn't having an attack, thank goodness, but I recognized that I might have been in a position where an attack could occur, if I dwelt on the wrong things for too long.
I was interrupted from my contemplation, thankfully, when I heard something surprising.
"Shit."
My jaw dropped as I looked at Liz. She had a strangely... amused expression on her face. "Shit," she said again, seeming to like the sound of the word. "Shit, shit, shit. I like that. It has a certain... bite to it. What does it mean?"
A little confused, I admitted, "It's a less polite word for excrement."
"Oh, so it's like 'muck' or 'dung', she said, nodding. Apparently, I had just taught the game how to curse. So... there wasn't a profanity filter on this game? Alpha build, I reminded myself, then decided that might be something to test.
An imp of mischief came to my mind as I asked, "What curse words are used where you come from?"
As she began moving across the field, examining the positioning the blocks around her, she said, "Well, like I said, there's 'muck' and 'dung'. Those are pretty useful. Griffins, pegasai and other feathered species are fond of 'pluck', given how much getting a feather plucked out can hurt. 'Flock' is considered insulting in griffin culture as well: Griffins are adamant on how any instinct to come together in groups comes from their leonine heritage, not their avian. After all, eagles are solitary hunters."
"Makes sense," I commented, surprised and pleased. Like I said, I like lore, and it seemed that the world that Elizabeth came from was pretty complex. Maybe too complex...
A certain metaphorical penny was now hanging half way over the edge now. Look, I know it's taking me a while to make the conclusions you guys might have, but some of you are used to magic. I was, asides from my one cataclysmic experience, practically a virgin in these matters. You spend your whole life thinking you live in a rational world, thinking that this shit doesn't happen, but thinking that if it did, it would be pleasant. Then it happens, it turns out to be awful, but you're promised that it was as random as being struck by lightning. Think about the aftermath of being struck by lighting and surviving, though. Yes, you'll be scared of thunderstorms from then on. That's sane. That's rational. Anyone would behave that way. However, thunderstorms are big, obvious, hard to miss. The last thing you'd expect is that on a clear, sunny day, a lightning bolt to come politely knock on your door and ask to be invited in for tea. I may be a digger, but due to how... different this situation was from my last experience with magic, I wasn't able, or maybe just not willing, to put two and two together yet.
But that time would soon be coming...
"...and the nagas tend to use 'milk' to describe things they find disgusting. Reptiles aren't exactly used to that kind of stuff, even if they are willing to use it for cooking," Elizabeth continued, as she began moving blocks on her own. I was surprised by her initiative, and the fact that she was already using, without having been given any prompting, the very same strategy that I had considered myself. As she began maneuvering the blocks in the method necessary to get one sitting on the center tile, she asked, "What kind of words, asides from 'shit', do your people use for cursing?"
Well, she asked, so I answered, stating, "Well, there's 'damn', which means, primarily, to condemn, or to be condemned. There's various cultural overtones to that one, but let's not stray too far off topic. There's also 'ass', which is mostly used to denote the posterior, or just a generally unlikable person. There's also 'asshole', which I don't need to explain, I think, which is a more severe form of 'ass'. There's 'bitch', a word normally used to describe a female dog, but can be used to describe a mean, cruel, or otherwise unlikable woman. It can also be used to describe an individual who is in a position of servitude to you, or just someone inferior in all ways to yourself. There are... also words that are, crudely, associate with the genitals or with sexual intercourse in general, but, um... there's certain levels of decorum to be observed, and I'm not going to use those words in the company of a lady." I might, under some circumstances, use the word 'fuck' in the presence of a lady, but I try to avoid that when I can.
Elizabeth, visibly blushing as she succeeded in moving a block to the center tile, said, "Very considerate of you, thank you."
"You're welcome," I said, then added, "Good job on getting the block to the center, by the way."
With an adorable little giggle, Liz said, "Thanks! I knew that was going to be the hardest part, so I worked on that one first." She began moving the first of the other four blocks to the corners.
"Smart girl," I said, smiling. A thought occurred to me, and I asked, "Now, um, I've been wondering, what is it that you normally do, when you're not trapped in abandoned ruins, miles from civilization?"
"Nothing that interesting," Liz admitted as the first of the corner blocks slid into place. "I was... well, I'll be honest with you: I was a menial. I literally couldn't fight to save my life, so I did tasks that no one else wanted to do, or thought was 'beneath' them." Changing her voice to a gruff, rude-sounding tone, she said, "'Drone, clean up that mess,' 'Drone, fetch me a pitcher of water,' and sometimes 'Drone, drag that corpse away, it is starting to smell'. That one was a favorite of some of the less... discrete aristos." She shuddered, and said, "Sometimes... I had to make two or three trips for the same corpse. Other times... it wasn't quite a corpse yet, but close enough that nobuggy could do anything about it."
"Yikes," I said, a little shocked. "Not a life you'd want to go back to, I take it."
"If I had the choice between being locked in Tartarus or being back with the swarm," she said as the second block moved to the glowing tile, "I'd take Tartarus in a heartbeat, and even sing a musical number about how the the hordes of demonic fiends locked within were a thousand times superior to the company of even one changeling aristocrat." She paused, then sighed and said, "I'm being unfair. There's a few that don't fit that mold, I guess: Doc Green Bottle is a decent enough guy, I guess, and House Beetle has a lot going for it. A little too... militaristic for my tastes, but otherwise, they were good bugs. And... even if the current patriarch of House Roach is a bloated, pompous... what was that word you used? Asshole? Yes, definitely, well, his son is alright in my book: That apple fell a solid mile from the tree, and started running as far as it could. And... you'll never hear a word of complaint from me about the current queen's younger sister, either: Nice girl, even though she has every reason to be as bitter as I am, if not more so. But the overwhelming majority of our aristocracy is comprised of scum and worse than scum."
I voiced the first thought that came to mind, asking, "Why didn't you leave, then?"
"The same reasons nobuggy else leaves," she said as block three reached its destination. "One, the aristocracy hunts down and... punishes everybuggy who tries to leave, or even talks about leaving. Or talks about changing anything, ever. Two, the only place that a changeling has any sense of relative safety is with the swarm. We're not really welcome anyplace else, given our biological requirements. Outside the swarm, we're hunted down and... well, it's often as bad as what the aristos would do to us, I'm told. Although, it is the aristos doing the telling, so who knows? Three, hunting for love energy is hard to do if you don't know what you're doing, and beyond the aristocracy, nobuggy gets any training on how to be a proper infiltrator. The common changeling couldn't act his way out of a paper bag, unless he has a natural gift for it. Put all that together, and it makes a more or less perfect cage. Of course, maybe after Canterlot, things will change..."
"What happened at Canterlot?"
As the fourth block began shaking in preparation to move, she said, "Too much to put into words. Our leadership managed to bungle everything in ways that I'd have to invent new words to do it justice. Beyond that... I'd rather not talk about it." When the block reached its destination, a little tune played, and the door opened.
"Fair enough," I said, and let the subject drop. "Well, that's floor two cleared." Lowering the orb back to eye level, I stated, in an exaggeratedly formal tone, "Shall we be off, milady?"
I was rewarded with a blush from Elizabeth as she said, "Lead the way, good sir."
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5379878
AND ANOTHER, BECAUSE I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!
YAY!
Awesome! Loved Hiro teaching Elizabeth cusswords in English. Will he teach her Japanese ones too? He almost certainly knows them, even if he isn't exactly fluent.
And I am guessing the metaphorical penny is going to drop in the next chapter.
I find it a little odd that he has not tried to use task manager to find out what the is program actually doing it would be a good way to find out if his computer was actually processing it I mean if such an advanced game was not using any of the power of he's rig that should start setting off alarm bells.
5380648
He's still somewhat in a state of denial about this. Partly, it's due to how different this situation is from his last experience. Also, his 'responsible research' before running the game itself left him with the assumption that things were on the up and up. He took several steps to ensure that this was exactly what it was supposed to be on the surface, so, while he's becoming more and more suspicious, he's still not yet at a point where he would say 'OH MY GOSH, MAGIC IS HAPPENING!!!' Like he said, after you've been struck by lightning once, you expect lightning to come from thunderstorms, not for lightning to politely come into your house and politely chat with you over tea and cookies. Like he said, the time when he'll make the full realization is coming, but it isn't here yet. He's at the point, though, where a good, solid push will put him over the edge.
But, how you're describing how he'd confirm it is a pretty good method, yes.
5380811
True. Which is why 95% is marginal: Magic was once very common on earth in this story, and that magic formed the basis of the myths and legends that people tell now. Then, for various reasons, the magic left. However, the magic is coming back now, slowly, and has been for a few decades. Problem is, the absence was long enough for 'Deniers', something like a genetic defect, to appear and become a little more widespread than it would be otherwise. Were magic to never return, eventually, everyone would become a denier.
Likewise, while magic is coming back, it isn't coming back where it once was before. The creatures coming back are smart enough to know that, good or evil, it is best to go someplace where no one is likely to look for you. If a kappa, a japanese man-eating turtle monster, suddenly appeared in the african wilderness, for example, the locals wouldn't notice the signs that would warn them that this creature was present... or know that it could be dissuaded from eating people by throwing cucumbers into the water (Although, I don't think cucumbers are native to Africa, so even that method would be unavailable to the locals). Plus, there's enough mundane man eating, or just man slaying, animals in or near the typical african river or stream (Crocs, hippos, lions, stuff like that) for one to blend into the local wildlife. Another example, if one of the 'Fair Folk' were to suddenly appear in Japan, he'd be able to blend right in, and be able to enter most places without a problem, unlike many places in Great Britain, where most homes, as a tradition, have an iron horse shoe nailed over the door way, even if it may have been painted over or forgotten. In Great Britain, where the traditions are strong, and upheld in many places, even today, a fae would be in danger of being caught, or even killed. In Japan, he'd have very little to fear. Last example: If Baba Yaga's hut on chicken legs were to appear in the australian outback, most sensible folks would just think that they were hallucinating, unlike in Russia, where her presence is well known and strikes terror into the hearts of men.
In a way, its like how, in the comic Tales Of The Questor, the author mentions how Basilisks kill people due to misinformation: People are expecting a monster that turns people to stone with a glance, not one that kills a man just by being near him.
The people who 'believe', don't necessarily believe in the things currently moving into their neighborhood, so while not blind, they just think that its odd, not a monster from a foreign culture. It takes a certain kind of 'all-over belief', a willingness to suspend disbelief in any quarter, no matter how bizarre, to be able to see it all. One has to be able open their eyes to everything, in order for one to be a digger.
5380875
True, but its another way the aristocracy keeps its stranglehold on the population: Currency facilitates trade, which facilitates contact with outside societies, which facilitates the free exchange of ideas. Ideas like maybe, just maybe, those shiny disks of metal, which may not be able to buy you 'food' that you can eat, may be able to buy you things that can supply you with food. Money can't buy love, but it can buy a puppy, which essentially is the same thing if you treat the little thing right. If the changeling commoners had been allowed more contact with outside societies, beyond just going in, taking what they needed, and leaving, then things might change, and they might find newer, gentler ways to live. The aristocracy, like many ruling classes that kept a stranglehold on their population, has done all it can to prevent new ideas from coming in, to prevent anyone from even entertaining the idea of change. 'Those outside hate us, they say, and will kill you if you leave us, if we don't kill you first.' On every level, the aristocracy has taken steps to retain their hold on every aspect of changeling life. The few houses that are more progressive are a minority, and to attempt to force a change would result in a civil war... one that the progressives would be certain to lose.
On the Hierarchy of Needs, most Equestrians are at the top-most level, Self-Actualization. To keep the commoners in check and reliant upon their masters, the aristocracy keeps the changelings at a point where they are constantly struggling to maintain the lowermost level, the Physiological. It has proven to be a most effective tyranny, given that, a thousand years after its creation, the aristocracy still maintains its power, even with a zero percent approval rating.
5380325 Well, i'm currently learning Japanese and there are no so to speak curse words. The closest to them would be to be impolite or extremely rude. Or at least that's what i learned. Of course there are words to be translated into English curses but they do not hold such a meaning in Japanese. (I'm reciting this from memory, don't kill me if it shows out I'm wrong.)
5380973 i am surpriced there isn't assassination attempts from the commoners, i mean even while struggling to maintain the basic needs, there would be a lot of unrest, and some might consider to try one, or even from the more progresive aristos.
Why do I find the term "nobuggy" to be so amusing?
5382179
Love energy, the 'wealth' of the aristocracy, translates directly into magical power for them. Each of the aristos have enough love energy available to level cities, and while normally divided against each other in internal power struggles, they unite against any threat to their power, real or perceived. The last time there was an assassination originating from the common class, centuries ago, they killed every commoner above the age of eighteen, just to make certain that everyone understood that this would not be tolerated again. There hasn't been another attempt since then: Risking one's own life is one thing, but risking the life of your entire generation? Completely different thing entirely.
5382189
Because it's funny?
5381111 I only know a few words myself, so you'd know better than I would, though given that "Baka" is just about the meanest thing I know in Japanese that isn't aimed at a demographic (and would make sense), and I do tend to try to look for that sort of thing somewhat (a legacy of elementary and middle school), you're probably right.
I loved this chapter! Can't wait for the next.
And every time, she would answer with but three words, "As you wish." But what he didn't know was that when she said "As you wish", what she actually meant was "I love you."
...
What? Wrong story?
5385883
wat
Block puzzles. Why did it have to be block puzzles?!
5380936
Don't be silly. Baba Yaga would never go to Australia. The locals'd shoot her. Or something would eat her house. Dangerous place, Australia...
5386107
And a dangerous woman is Baba Yaga. The Russians are scared of her. 'Nuff said.
5385883
Replace 'I love you' with 'I hope you die in a fire', and you'll have it.
5386290
Virtually every living thing in Australia is deadly and can kill a person in all sorts of horrifying ways. I think Baba Yaga would have some competition.
5386294 Heh. Wesley probably would have been better off thinking that, too. Buttercup was a twit.
On another note, any chance we can see Elizabeth's song and dance number about how wonderful Tartarus is?
5386313
.
...Maybe in a sequel
5387696
I only ask of course because, given this is Equestria, it would be very easy to pull such a thing off.
*snort*