Two Background Ponies Revisit Season Four

by Piccolo Sky

Daring Don't

Daring Don’t

"Thanks for helping me out with fixing this typewriter, Sam. It's been a pain in the tail trying to type messages with one key out."

Sam could hardly disagree as he continued to work at clearing out some chewing gum from one of Farrah's kids stuck under the typewriter...which had all of three keys to begin with. All of the letters Carl had written as of late were pretty much just: "SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS..."

The green stallion scratched his head. "Seriously, though. You'd think there'd be more than one repairpony in this town. Do they think everypony just 'dictates' things to unicorns?"

"Dangit...we need some of that pressurized air..." Sam grunted as he kept working. "I'm afraid to use some of that Spitfire stuff or it'll bleed on every page you type for weeks..."

Unable to do much, Carl leaned back and crossed his hooves. After a moment, however, Sam spoke up from his work.

"So...you heard the rumor, right Carl?"

"...Which one would that be, Sam?"

"That every single book in the 'Daring Do' series is actually based on the true stories of A.K. Yearling?"

Carl went rigid. "...You're joking, right?"

Sam shook his head. "The deathtraps, the temples, the villains, the relics...every last one of them is real. None of those books are fiction. They're autobiographical."
Carl continued to freeze.

"...So...Daring Do is a real pony."

"Yeah."

"...And everything she's done is real. Which means she's single handedly saved us all from supernatural forces on numerous occasions."

"Yeah."

Carl continued to stare blankly out.

"...What the hell, man?! Why aren't you reacting to this a bit more strongly?!"

Sam paused in his work. "Uh...why?"

"Dude...Daring Do. Is. REAL. Doesn't that shock you to think that she's really running around somewhere in all these ancient temples getting out all these infernal and heathen relics of ultimate power and loading our museums with them whenever she's not at home transcribing her own adventures?!"

"...Carl, exactly how many times has Ponyville faced utter disaster in the past three years? Nightmare Moon, the Ursa Minor, the parasprites, Discord, the Great and Powerful Trixie..."

"But dude! Doesn't this freak you out?! Doesn't this redefine reality for you?! What if there is no such thing as fiction?! What if everything we ever read was completely true?! Do you know what that would make the world?! I mean...what if it's filled with all sorts of crazy sh't and monsters?!"

Sam groaned, leaning out from the typewriter. "Dude...it was one time. Crazy as it is, it's nothing to get bent out of shape about." With that, he turned his head and began to look around the room they were in. "Isn't that right, Mr. White Rabbit?"

"I'm late for a very important date! But...yes, it's true, Sam."

"Treebeard?"

"Vrooom....vrooom....yes, little pony."

"Pennywise?"

"Of course. Want a balloon?"

"Great Cthulhu?"

"T'KLEEEEH T'KLEEEEH."

Sam looked back to the green stallion. "See, we all agree, Carl. Just because one fictional story turned out to be real doesn't mean that every work of fiction is real."

Carl groaned and slumped a bit...before an edgier-dressing, slacker-in-appearance version of Carl came over to him and clapped him on the shoulder.

"Now stop whining and help fix the typewriter. We still need to hit the liposuction dumpsters before we can start making soap tonight."

"Sigh...alright, Tyler..."

---

…So, if Daring Do is real, where the heck was she when Tirek showed up?

I dunno…going after the Holy Pail? Anyway…Carl, you didn’t really have a split personality named Tyler Durdin, did you?

Well…you know…there was that one summer in college…

Oops, it’ll have to wait! Time for the next one!

Comments

[Jadelynn_Opal]

Okay, the section where the various fictional people popped up to express their sentiment was humorous, but when Tyler Durden came in I just lost it.