Pain. Searing pain. Twilight's body felt frozen, colder than the blizzards in the north. She couldn't open her eyes, or hear anything around her.
"I'm trapped! I'm alone! I'm going to be trapped in this accursed darkness forever! What is happening to me?" Twilight screamed in her head. Her head was foggy, and her mind resisted her when she summoned memories.
"At last! My return! I can leave behind that life! My family is together again! Out glorious reign shall not end!" A voice echoed in Twilight's head. It sounded like her own, only twisted and cruel.
"Who are what are you?!" Twilight imagined if she could be heard, she would be shouting.
"There there dear! No need to shout! I'm in here with you! Whatever we think, the other can hear. I am you. Yet I am myself." It almost sounded as if it was mocking her.
"What do you mean?" Twily asked, almost frightened to hear the reply.
"You are the weaker form of myself. You are Twilight Sparkle, I am Coldlight Glimmer! Princess of the Crystal Empire. And, Princess Twilight Sparkle, I'm afraid you are no longer needed. Only I am. You need to accept me, Twilight, let us become one. Then will Equestria tremble under our might!" It replied. Malice was in its voice.
"Never! My friends will never let Equestria, or the Crystal Empire fall!" Twilight shouted, even as she spoke with confidence, fear edged its way into her thoughts.
"Oh…I feel your fear and doubt. Twilight Sparkle, tell me, who delivers mail in Ponyville?" Coldlight asked.
"Oh I know that! It's… WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY MEMORIES!" Twilight shouted.
"Relax…it's just phase one. It's time to wake up…Princess. You still have control, but I will break you." Coldlight commented as Twilight regained consciousness.
"So, Twilight Sparkle or Coldlight?" Cadenza asked.
"My name is Twilight Sparkle, and I hate you." She said and she attacked her old foal sitter.
"TWILIGHT STOP!" Twilight heard Coldlight scream in her head. The force of the shout made Twilight freeze. "That's right, Sparkle, you thought I was gone. Oh…I will haunt you until you give in. All you have to do is surrender to me, and all of your nightmares will cease."
"You're wrong, Coldlight Glimmer! You are my nightmare!" Twilight shouted back mentally. Her comment only earned an evil cackle.
"Well! At least Coldlight has some control! Now just listen to her, Twilight! This isn't you! Celestia's and Luna's spell were meant mainly to keep King Sombra imprisoned. We were just kind of thrown in! Several years ago, the prison weakened. Sombra could not escape, but we could. I chose to keep my memories, you chose to hide yours so that you could infiltrate at a deeper level. We cast an age spell so that I would be just old enough to foal sit you in the future! We found a family that had a baby that looked similar to you. We killed her and put you in her place. It's time, Twilight! You lived your life, now give me back my daughter! Please!" Cadenza's voice no longer sounded cold, instead it sounded soft and pleading. Twilight almost gave in when she noticed Mi Amore's horn glowing. She once again knocked her to the ground.
"Mind-influence spells don't work on me, Mi Amore! You're a terrible pony! I can't believe I let you into my brother's life! You'll never win! All I wanted was the life I had! I don't even want to call you 'Cadence' anymore! You don't deserve to be referred to in such a friendly way! Mi Amore-My Friend. That name isn't fitting, Cadenza! Twilight's rage had reached a boiling point.
"Not fitting, huh? To everypony, I was a friend. I was the one to calm you and your father, I was the one with a semi-caring heart! You are the monster here, Twilight! Keeping a mother from her filly? That's cruel!" Mi Amore shouted.
"You call that being a monster? You killed Shining Armor's sister! She didn't even have a chance at life! You are a sick excuse for a mother!"
"GIRLS!" The voice echoed around the room.
"Uh oh… now Dad's mad." Coldlight commented.
King Sombra entered just as regally as always. "If you two would cease your bickering then maybe something could be done around her!" His voice reflected his anger.
"Yes, sir." Twilight said, then realized what she had just said.
"Coldlight!" She thought.
"Well what you were going to say would have made him madder. So I simply pushed you to agree with him." Coldlight's voice was smug like she just said she discovered the cure for the common cold.
"Would you just get out of my head?" Twilight asked her.
"Ms. Sparkle, this was my head first."
It's PRINCESS Sparkle to you!" Twilight snapped angrily.
Twilight brought her attention back to the two ponies before her.
"My dear, anything you care to tell us about the Celestial Sisters?" Sombra asked.
Anger, fear, hatred, love, admiration, humility, friend, enemy.
Emotions from Coldlight and Twilight merged together at the reference to the royal sisters.
"Yeah… a message." Twilight said. She leaned over and firmly slapped Sombra's cheek.
that same time in Canterlot
"Sister, tis alright. We shall stop Sombra and his family. Please, stop your tears." Luna said in an attempt to lift her sister's spirits.
"My lady, if it isn't too much to ask, what happened to Princess Twilight Sparkle?" Flash asked with a puzzled expression. Only Rainbow Dash and Discord had enough composure to tell the story.
"We must save her!" Flash Sentry cried out after hearing the sad tale. He turned to fly off, only to be caught by a rope.
"Ain't no good, sugar cube. It took the Crystal heart to defeat Sombra last time. Without their princess, the Crystal Ponies won't feel any love n' unity. And it took the Element of Harmony to defeat him the time before that, and Ah recon' they won't work without Twi." Apple Jack said through tears.
"I like your initiative, though! Twilight definitely chose the right stallion to get…mnmnmmmn." The last part was muffled by an apple.
"To get what?" Flash's wings unfurled hopefully.
"To get transferred onto her guard!" Rarity was there to save the day from Rainbow Dash's almost embarrassing slip.
"Oh." Flash seemed to deflate a little, but then sprung back to joy faster than Pinkie Pie could. "You mean, Princess Sparkle asked for me? That's incredible!" He called. His joy only lasted a few moments before he dropped back into depression.
"Listen, everypony." Celestia said. Her sobs had ceased, but nothing could be done about the tears still flowed. "I intend to rescue my student. Who's going to help me?"
"I will!" Flash's reply was a bit too fast and too loud.
"Count the Elements in!" Rarity cried. Fluttershy yelped and hid behind Celestia's thone.
"I will help too, for Equestria, not its traitorous princesses.
"And what does that mean, sister?" Celestia asked.
"We can try to deny it all we want, sister, but Coldlight Glimmer is a sworn enemy of Equestria. As you recall, it was her powers that kept our battle against Sombra from being a quick one. Now she has your teachings. She must be stopped at all costs." Luna's voice sounded as if she had declared war.
"Luna! I will do anything possible to ensure the well being of my most faithful…" Celestia began. As she spoke, they watched Apple Jack pull the sweetest looking apple from her stash. She shoved in in the princess's mouth.
"Ah think we all agree that this here Coldlight Glimmer must be dealt with right away. But A think we also agree that Twi is our friend and she needs to be saved from 'er past life." Apple Jack stated. "Ah know Twilight Sparkle, and she was tellin the truth about not knowin what Sombra was talkin' 'bout. Anypony here that says Ah don't know the truth when Ah see it is a lier!"
"Applejack's right! We have to save Twilight and stop Coldlight!" Rainbow Dash called.
"YAY! THEN WE CAN HAVE A 'WELCOME BACK TO GOOD TWILIGHT' PARTY!" Pinkie said. She emphasized her point by blasting her party cannon.
"Good one, Pinkie!" Discord called as the confetti from the cannon turned itself into a feather and began to tickle the pink mare.
More Please
Holy crab cakes this is one of the darkest fics I have ever read. I want more!
I hope you update soon!
Well now I understand how that worked out, before I didn't see how this story would work, but bravo!
Cadence is evil and Sombra’s wife, working with him all the time? And Twilight is their daughter? That’s actually a pretty creative idea for a story. Sure Cadence has to be very OCC for this story but that’s nothing that can’t be solved with a good background. Unfortunately this promising concept was turned into a rather lackluster story.
Maybe it’s just me but shouldn’t Twilight be a little bit more freaked out by this? It’s not an everyday occurrence that you suddenly end-up in the Crystal Caves without a warning while minding your own business.
Discord might be able to pull of something like that but Sombra who’s “just” a powerful wizard? Speaking of Discord, can’t he just teleport himself away or is Sombra more powerful than him?
It makes sense that RD jumps to a conclusion and accuses the former bad guy Discord of begin the traitor. It also makes sense for Discord to feel offended by said accusation and calls her the mole. What makes no sense, however, is the fact that everybody else immediately buys it and throws around random accusations.
“Well if the evil wizard who brought us down her says that one of us is a mole it must be true. I can’t imagine that Sombra of all ponies would lie to us.”
That makes no sense at all. Sombra states that one of the unaccused ponies is guilty, but Cadance isn't one of them. This means that he is either lying or not as smart as he believes.
She might be an evil brainwashing empresses, but she’s a evil brainwashing empress with officially approved divorce papers.
A sentences like should be used in a Comedy fic and doesn't belong into a serious story.
No Sombra she’s not a traitor. She didn’t know that you were still alive, she didn’t know that she was your daughter and most important of all: She didn’t work for you. Are you sure you didn’t receive some sort of brain damage after you were hit by the wave of the Crystal Heart?
So what would’ve happened if he hadn’t singed them? Would King Sombra just send everyone back home and leave without conquering Equestria?
Word of advices: Scrap the divorce papers. It makes both the villains and the good guys look like idiots who don’t get their priorities right.
Unlike most stuff so far this makes some sense. It provides a good motivation for Cadence desire to foalsit Twilight, although I don’t quite get why she needed to marry SA. Couldn’t she stay close to Twilight by just begin her foalsitter and good friend?
Ahh what a great traitor she is, isn’t she Sombra?
Bye Twilight’s parents. How nice that you showed up and did nothing important at all.
Both of them together had only one line of dialogue that line wasn’t even about the shocking reveal that Twilight isn’t their daughter. Celestia’s reaction was more emotional that theirs. They were just staffage.
Either give them more lines to show us how their reactions or or don’t bring them into the story at all.
This is good. Not there are two different personalities fighting for control over Twilight’s mind: The real but evil Coldlight Glimmer persona and the fake but good-hearted Twilight Sparkle. Reminds me of Doctor Who’s Mr. Clever from “Nightmare in Silver”
Problem No. 1: Cadance stated that it was Twilight’s choice to alter her memories and impersonate the daughter of another family. But she also states that the child was a baby. Which means that Twilight must’ve been at the same age otherwise it wouldn’t have worked.
The implication is that Twilight came up with her murder & infiltration plan while begin a baby. I knew that she was a smart child but I doubt that a baby was able to pull off something like that.
Problem No. 2: How was this whole murder plan going to help them free Sombra? They just replaced Twilight with the daughter of a random couple. Yes, she ended up as personal student of Celestia but they had no way of knowning that in advances. It was sheer luck that everything turned out to be in their favor.
Problem No. 3: Why was Twilight the one who had to hide herself? Cadance is the Alicorn princess coming out of nowhere. And this leads us to…
Problem No. 4: Obviously nobody knew about King Sombra’s Alicorn wife and his daughter. Otherwise Cadance would’ve been imprisoned the moment she surfaced. Instead she gained Celestia’s thrust with a false background story and became a Princess. So why didn’t she simply say : “Oh by the way, this is my daughter Twilight. Her husband sadly died some time ago. I hope you don’t mind her staying in the palace, too?”
That would have been a lot easier and smarter than this kill-and-replace scheme, not to mention that it would’ve allowed Cadance to stay with her daughter instead of pretending to be a mere foalsitter.
Problem No. 5: Why did she help them to kill Sombra? She had the perfect opportunity to screw over everypony by not catching the Crystal Heart. Then Sombra would’ve won and the Elements of Harmony would be at their mercy. Instead they decided to wait until Twilight coronation just to reveal their evil plan in front of everyone and before they ran away with Twilight.
So yeah both Cadance and Sombra are pretty stupid bad guys.
As you can see this doesn’t put the story in a good light. You clearly need to improve a lot, because currently this is an inconsistent mess.
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Thank you for pointing these problems out. I'll see if I can explain them in future chapters.
I'm sorry, some of my story was not clear. I will explain why the Princess didnt recognize either Cadence or Twilight. Twilight and Cadence had age spell cast on them, so Twilight wasn't a filly when they were imprisoned. The point of Twilight and Cadence infiltrating was not to free Sombra, but for Twilight to increase her magical abilities. They knew of Twilight's magic potential, so they put her with a Canterlot family that would surely get her tested for Celestia's School. Sombra and Cadence waited to reveal themselves until after Twilight's coronation because Alicorn have more magical abilities than Unicorns. If Cadence ha revealed herself to be a spy, then everypony would be suspicious. And they revealed their plans just to show off that thy had outsmarted Celesia herself. They will realize later how stupid it was to taunt Celestia.
I do have to agree that Cadence and Sombra are pretty lame villians. I felt that Sombra was pretty lame in the Crystal Empire episode, so it was only fitting that his wife is a terrible villian too, right?
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Thank you for pointing these problems out. I'll see if I can explain them in future chapters.
I assumed that Sombra just kept family hidden from public eyes, like some real politicans do. So the only people knowing anything about this could be the Crystal Ponies and they lost most of their memories thanks to Sombra’s spell.
I still don’t see the point behind this whole charade. Why couldn’t Cadence keep her daughter and ask Celestia to be her teacher. It’s hard to believe that Celestia would’ve said no, after witnessing Twilight’s potential.
Alternatively she could’ve used the age spell, give her some fake memories about her father and still keep her as her daughter. There’s no reason why she had to smuggle her into the school as child of another couple. All she had to do was showing up with her daughter and enlisting her into the school.
Again, this was the worst possible move at the worst possible time. She had a really big opportunity to reconquer the Crystal Empire, capturing the bearers of the Elements and the leader of Equestrian’s royal guard in one swift move. Instead she helped them blowing up her husband. Maybe she was still bitter that Sombra couldn't remember their wedding day?
The main issue I’m having with Sombra’s portrayal is that he didn’t live up to the expectations. He was introduced as this real evil and powerful wizard king who enslaved a whole civilizations and everyone knew this guy was bad news. His first appearance on-screen as big smoke creature was also handled very well. He felt like a serious threat. Sadly that was all we got, the rest of the time he was just growling and hissing acting more like some savage beast than a cunning and evil Overlord ala Sauron. All in all it was a wasted opportunity.
You know when somepony says "Your evil Mi Amore!" Or "Your a terrible pony Mi Amore!" They are saying, "Your evil, my love!" And "Your terrible pony My Love!"
Because the name Mi Amore Cadenza means "My Love, Cadence." In French.
Lol...it's funny.
XD this line
Ouch that's gatta hurt (I think)
With discord by there side, I'm surprised Twilight hasn't been saved already.