• Published 29th Feb 2012
  • 1,875 Views, 54 Comments

Sailing the solar wind. - JadeCriminal



Equestria: Pocket universe. Somewhat hastily made on the fly. The Mane 6: Interstellar Diplomats

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A Rare Event VI

"Hey Miss Sparkle, I'm gonna wind it down now for an hour or so until past midnight with some chill-out prance combo." Vinyl Scratch absently informed the Organizer Adept while staring in awe at the three fillies that have been tearing up the dance floor with minimum breaks since sundown.

"No problem Miss Pon Three. Pinkie said you two talked about the music schedule and I trust the skill in moving an audience you have displayed thus far." Twilight smiled a silly smile at the DJ, wondering how she could see in the party gloom while wearing those rainbow lensed goggles. The purple mare was floating a tall glass with a few ice cubes and a lot of drink in it and took a small sip.

"Your break is well earned, go on have a dance yourself. I also recommend you try this nice ice tea from Manehattan and enjoy the party. Very tasty. Also call me Twilight."

"Sure think Twilight. Pinkie was oddly specific this morning on the timing on some of the songs but I don't regret accepting a gig in Ponyville... I have to ask about those three tho." DJ Pon3 shook her head and pointed at the dance floor where the three fillies were dragging an exhausted looking Spike back to the center of the dance floor leaving claw marks in the dirt. "How in Equestria are they still up and jumping around? I've seen more energetic ravers but those were adults with lots of practice."

"Evil Chaos Magic?" Suggested Twilight and then giggled at her hilarious and daringly edgy joke. Something niggled in the back of her head. What could she have forgotten. She shrugged and took another sip of her tea.

"Oh I reckon I can answer that Miss... Pon Tree was it?" Applejack offered from the sidelines with a slight confused frown having never heard of this type of tree.

"Please, It's Vinyl, Vinyl Scratch. Pon3 is my stage name." The white Dj unicorn corrected gently.

"Sure thang Vinyl. I reckon there are three parts to their endurance. One, the Cutie Mark Crusaders are always, from dawn to dusk tearing up the town on on of their Crusades. Unless they're in school or doing chores of course. Outdoors air is mighty good for fillies. Two, this is the first 'grownup' party they have been allowed to attend thanks to some nepotism and ah reckon they're mighty excited." She pointed at the guest of honor who looked up from her conversation with Fluttershy and gave a little wave.

"And finally, number three," She pointed at the slightly smaller built booth in one corner of the barn where empty plates and Pie holders were stack up high. "It looks like they've eaten their weight in food. Most of it had sugar in some form or another. When they crash they'll want to sleep for a week."

"Of course, the food! I wanted to ask about those Pies. How would one go about ordering a couple dozen of those?" asked the unicorn party DJ as the mystery of the super energetic fillies was answered to her satisfaction.

"Oh Sugar, I reckon you asked the right mare. Have a seat and let's talk." Applejack gestured next to her.

As the DJ and farm mare talked Twilight swept her gaze over the rest of the room. Across the barn ponies were talking, dancing and laughing. Pinkie Pie was tirelessly floating around the room like a somewhat random butterfly/bee/chameleon hybrid, changing her outfit to fit the mood, support some cheesy pun or aid in a punch line.

Rainbow Dash was in one corner whispering and nuzzling up to the Flower Twins. She smiled. They weren't quite smooching but give them an hour or two when the filly curfew passed and they would be. How she managed to seduce both the mare and the stallion was still on Twilight's 'mysteries to solve' list right with Pinkie Pies precognition and Fluttershy's Epic Intimidation skills. Twilight herself had trouble getting past the second date let alone maintaining a 'friendship with benefits'... With twins... Of opposite genders. She shook her head and looked away. Jealousy was unbecoming of a true friend and Dash admittedly had charisma in spades when she was on a roll.

A green fleck of illusionary images drew her gaze across the room to where Zecora was engaged in an intense discussion with Nurse Dear Heart. An illusion of a spasming pony heart floated somewhat grimly between them and at Zecora's gesture the illusion swiftly changed to add a depiction of a Nightshade flower which was then swiftly infused with other ingredients into a potion. The potion flowed inside the heart and it shuddered and stared beating regularity.

Nurse Dear Heart looked skeptical and stabbed her hoof at the heart ventricles, gesturing wildly. Zecora smiled and shook her head, the ventricles got enlarged and shown that while they were slightly damaged Oak Mistletoe was wrapped around them and holding them together as they healed.

Twilight felt that she could follow their conversation with just looking at the illusion despite her somewhat spotty medical expertise. If she was correct and the potion worked like Zecora said it did? That potion was going to save lives. Making a mental notes to look up the magical effects of digitalis, oak mistletoe and nightshade. She also made a mental note to check her notes on Timber-wolf Mistletoe.

As she contemplated the future research she spotted the DJ moving across the floor to her friends Lyra and Octavia and realized she had gotten too focused as she followed the animated medical discussion, no pun intended, and lost track of time. Still, she felt incredibly relaxed.

The party was a success, the music was great, her ice tea was delicious and every pony looked like they were having a good time. She knew now why Pinkie Pie liked throwing parties so much. Speaking of which where could she... Twilight halted her train of thought and instinctively turned around ignoring the logical part of her brain that was telling her it was unlikely to expect Pinkie Pie showing up behind her just because she thought about...

And yes, there Pinkie stood, reared on her hind legs a little way behind her holding a pin and a balloon in her hooves and there was Rainbow Dash who had apparently separated from the Flower twins to look at a support beam and whistle. The blue Pegasus was casually holding something probably explosive hidden from Twilight's sight. She felt the back of her eye twitch and she resolved her face into a Canterlot issue Firm Mask of Authority no6 while victoriously sticking her mental tongue at her Voice of Logic

Under the purple mage's frowning gaze Pinkie simply continued walking towards her before sitting down while Rainbow Dash slinked over to Fluttershy avoiding Twilight's gaze.

"Hi there." the carefree party pony smiled as Dash got really interested in what Fluttershy was saying. Apparently bunny census was a really intriguing topic. Twilight's nose twitched.

"Hello Pinkie, Having a good time?" She asked conversationally eying the, oh so casually set down instruments of Noisy Heart Attack sitting on the table in front of the Pink Pranknsassin.

Her reply was interrupted when Rarity turned her full Presence with a capital P onto the Pink pony the moment she settled in.

“Oh Pinkie Pie, I had been trying to catch you during a lull all evening, I have to ask. How in Equestria did you manage this? I only sent word I decided not to stay overnight in Canterlot a few hours before sundown?!” Rarity verbally pounced at Pinkie Pie as soon as the pink pony had settled at the table

“Party Cannon!” The Pink Pony responded cheekily waggling here eyebrows and smiling broadly and Twilight shook her head even as a small smile snuck onto her face against her will. "Also, you can catch me anytime you are prepared for the consequences."

“Pinkie!” Rarity complained, pouting at the fact that her friends were immune to her social skill and blushing slightly at how expertly Pinkie Pie twisted her words into a subtle innuendo while Rainbow nodded sagely in agreement with Pinkies statement. Fluttershy and Applejack stopped discussing bunny, (or as Applejack put it 'varmint') breeding cycles and turned to watch.

“A really big, Stalliongrad Built, line fed Party Cannon?” The Winged Mistress of Awesome offered, imagining it the hexplosions of confetti such a thing could fire. "Hey do you think if we build a big enough cannon we could launch a pony with the confetti? I could do a Rainboom going up!"

“Rainbow Dash...” Twilight finally broke down and smiled as she hoofed her rainbow maned friend on the shoulder as punishment for her numerous amusing, yet vexing indiscretions.

“Hey! Why do I get hit! Pinkie started it!” Rainbow Dash complained.

“She was out of reach.” Twilight said and then threw the drinking straw from her Manehattan Ice Tea at Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie Pie stuck out her tongue at Twilight and then expertly caught the straw and chewed it as she explained:

“Ok ok, so it was going down when Twilight asked for my help throwing a party so I borrowed some time from when I was bored and sent out invites by Spike airways and asked every-pony to come early for a pre-party party and to lend a hoof. Twilight used her ginormous organizational brain to help out and organize everything efficiently and we had the stage from last time. So this is Technically A Pinkie Twilight party. Or would that be Tinkie Pwilight party? Maybe a Pinkle Twi party?” Pinkies eyes crossed as she worked out this complex problem and then she just shrugged, spat out the heavily chewed red straw, now tied into three knots tied and grabbed a cupcake.

“Anyways. It was a team effort between Me, Twilight and Myself. Also some other ponies helped. Also Spike.” She concluded shoving the entire thing in her mouth and munching. Twilight opened her mouth to ask how exactly Pinkie managed to write out those two hundred something gold laminated invitations that popped and shot out confetti when they were opened while she had been getting Spike from upstairs. Pinkie smiled at her expectantly and then looked behind her her smile widening into a full blown grin.

“And quite and effort it was. Is there room for one more?” A familiar regal voice came from behind the fillies. The six mares turned around and instantly recognized the speaker. Even without her customary regalia, wearing a comfy sweater and her flowing, multicolored mane braided together and significantly more compact then usual it was impossible to mistake her for any pony else.

“P-Princess Celestia!” Twilight stammered as everypony stared for a moment. By the time the mares thought to get up and bow Celestia plopped down on the bench among them. “Not today girls. I have an aversion bubble in effect and bowing would probably disrupt it for a few seconds. As far as everyone else is concerned I'm just some big boned white mare named Sunrise.”

“Princess? Is...” Twilight started to pose a concerned question her face a contorted expression of surprise happiness and worry before she was pushed out of the way by Pinkie Pie. Thoughts of stable aversion bubbles and horrible royal emergencies clashed and collided in her head. Vaguely she considered constructing a runic array to sent Pinkie Pie to the moon for a week or so but dismissed it because of the power requirements. Her head was feeling off and so she took a sip of her delicious ice tea to clear it.

While Twilight was distracted Pinkie Pie took the opportunity to display her enthusiasm by throwing her hooves around the princess for a brief but enthusiastic hug.

“I knew it. I knew if I just kept sending the invites one of these days you would come to one of my parties.” Pinkie pie called out enthusiastically as she bounced around the table once and then settled back into her seat pushing a cupcake from the previously empty seeming pastry tray towards her monarch with a disturbingly large smile on her face. Princess Celestia smiled back at the Pink Antics nibbled at the cupcake and and reassured her still recovering student.

“Everything is well Twilight. Tonight is the second night in a thousand years I am completely free from any duties. And thus I came here to honor your invitation Pinkie Pie and your success Rarity. Do not think I had not enjoyed hearing about it.” Princess Celestia explained as she reached for another cupcake.

“But why? How? When?” Wondered Twilight having finally regained her wits. “You are always so busy.” Than she paused as understanding dawned.

“Luna?” She asked quietly.

“Indeed, My Faithful Student. My Sister has Ascended into her rightful place. Our rule was always meant to be a dual princessdom. Now my duties are halved. I have my Sun and my Sky while Luna has her Moon and her Stars again and this time the ponies love her night more then ever.” Celestia's gaze was far off as she smiled fondly.

"You should have seen her face light up when Luna realized there was an actual Amateur Astronomer Pony Society around and that couples viewed moonlight strolls as romantic." Her smile turned sour and she huffed exasperatedly. "Then she discovered modern pony pastimes like open sky rave parties and copper music concerts. How somepony can enjoy the noisy lightning guitars and gryphons and ponies yelling at the top of their heads of love and tolerance in between screams of claws and hunt was a mystery to me."

"Although now that I think about it Blood Beak had a certain intensity about him when he courted me a few years ago." She pondered thoughtfully. Rarity gasped and leaned forward and by now all the mares at the table were listening intently to the princesses musings.

Twilight choked on her Manehattan Ice Tea. Surely the princess surely did not mean Bloodbeak the Frenzied, the leader and main instigator of the Unification Civil war in Gryphonia. He was dead for sixty years now after a long and successful career as Prime Minister of Gryphonia after the previous hereditary earldom was overthrown. Her historical train of thought was further derailed as the princess continued.

"Maybe I am a bit hasty in condemning the music as noise. Gryphons have always been a bit fun to play 'predator and prey' with." She added, sighed in contentment and nibbled at the most excellent cupcake and chuckled her eyes sparkling evily. "Especially when they realized it was their turn to play prey."

Rainbow Dash nodded sagely to that, eying the princess with a strange respectful glimmer in her eye.

Twilight was stunned. The royal princess of Equestria was sitting with them in Applejacks barn wearing a purple cashmere sweater and nibbling on a cupcake with her hair down, her regalia absent and implying she had 'recently' had a... a fling! with Bloodbeak the Frenzied! The scenes rapidly flashed through her head, her massive intellect barely frazzled by the amount of alcohol she had been imbibing in her 'tea' building a medley of scenes in her head. Her eternally virginal mentor, running across a field at sundown, flank sweating and chest heaving from flight, rippling muscles and a purple flash of wing, tangled feathers and grasping talons, a nibble upon a sensitive neck and an eager moan and then... And Then. Oh Dear Celestia!

Pinkie glanced as Twilight's eyes derped inwards. The purple unicorn collapsed onto the table, horn piercing the wood, her face and neck flushed pale magenta all the way down to her shoulders. Surprisingly the almost empty glass of Manehattan Ice Tea was still expertly being levitated at her side. Pinkie giggled an took a sip from the straw. Her tongue curled as she smacked her lips appreciatively even as she eyed the six empty glasses of next to the purple mare. Her estimate of her friend's alcohol tolerance shifted towards respectable.

Rainbow Dash looked eager to hear more of this fond memory while Rarity looked torn between impressed and scandalized. Fluttershy was peaking at the princess beneath a hoof and Applejack was simply confused. Princess Celestia was acting like some of her Aunts when they came over for visit in stead of, ya know... Royalty.

“Um... Princess.” Apple Jack finally raised her voice hesitantly. “So you are here to... relax? With us?”

“Of course. Where else would I go?” Celestia asked with a smile. Her eyes sparkling with mirth as she was well aware that of how many in Canterlot Elite would faint at even imagining the setting she was in.

“But... Well. This is a simple barn party in Pony-ville. I'm sure you could go anywhere in the world...” Apple Jack wondered.

“And so I could young Apple Jack. And I came here. To be with My Most Faithful student and her friends, my most competent Elements Of Harmony and favorite pen pals. How many ponies do you think, my little Applejack, would just come out and ask if they wanted to know why I was there?” She looked around and then looked at Pinkie Pie as the Pony Pokey started playing. “Or have an actual prancing song begin while I was around. I think I would like to dance. If you would oblige me, Miss Pie.”

Pinkie, suddenly wearing a fancy stallion hat and an archaic tuxedo She was holding out a hoof in a fully formal court bow and sidestep, four hundred years out of date. “Why I would be positively delighted to, Miss Celestia.”

The five remaining mares stared as Princess Celestia left them to dance the Pony Pokey with Pinkie Pie and then excited chatter exploded as they realized that Celestia considered them valued friends.

Well almost everyone. Rarity stared because Pinkie Pie was wearing a supposedly one of a kind, hoity-toity personalized hat she had seen two days ago in Prance. A still passed out, blushing Twilight just mumbled in something about punishing Bloodbeak for heresy.



Author's note:
And then suddenly? Celestia...

I found out why my changes do not take sometimes... Work Offline kicks in when my connection wavers.

Edit: 23. April, Chapter re-revised. Enjoy!