• Published 10th Aug 2013
  • 1,659 Views, 65 Comments

Let it Rain - Metool Bard

If somepony gives their love to you, be sure to give it back. Poor Thunderlane is about to learn that the hard way as two mares compete for his attention.

  • ...

Writing Wrongs

After the Wonderbolts show was over, Raindrops said a quick farewell to Thunderlane and Rumble before heading straight to Golden Harvest's house. She knocked on the door, and was greeted by Derpy Hooves.

"Oh, 'Drops! This is a pleasant surprise," said she.

"Hiya, Derpy," Raindrops chirped. "May I come in?"

"Sure, sure!" said Derpy, leading Raindrops inside. "You're always welcome here, 'Drops. Never forget that."

"Thanks," said Raindrops cheerfully. Derpy took notice and gave Raindrops a knowing smirk.

"Well well. Somepony's in a good mood," she said as they went into the living room. "I take it things went well at the Wonderbolts show?"

"Oh, it was fantastic," said Raindrops with a whimsical sigh. "I really think this is it, Derpy. Thunderlane is... He and I are... I found... Ugh, you know what I mean."

"Still having trouble saying it, huh?" said Derpy.

"Yeah," said Raindrops sheepishly. "B-but I made it through the entire show without embarrassing myself or fainting, so that's something!"

Derpy chuckled. "Yeah, you're getting there, 'Drops. Now let's move on to the next step."

Raindrops's smile vanished. "The next step?" she parroted.

"Yeah. Now you gotta ask Thunderlane out on a date."


Raindrops jumped back, and her wings stood up on end.

"D-Derpy, that isn't a step; it's a giant leap!" she exclaimed. "I-I don't think I'm ready to do that!"

"Well, he asked you out on a date, didn't he?" asked Derpy.

"It wasn't a date~!" Raindrops cried in exasperation.

"Could you please keep it down? I'm trying to read."

"Mama, who's yelling?"

Raindrops blushed profusely as Derpy's daughters, Dinky Doo and Amethyst Star, wandered into the living room.

"S-sorry, girls," she apologized. "I-I just got overexcited about, something."

"Do I want to know?" asked Amethyst.

"I, don't think you do, Ammy," said Derpy, twiddling her hooves.

"Ooh, ooh! I know what it's about!" Dinky chirped. "But I promised Mama not to tell anypony."

Amethyst shrugged and rolled her eyes. "Whatever. But, just a word of advice. If you want to keep a conversation private, the whole house shouldn't be able to hear it."

"Noted," said Raindrops meekly as Amethyst walked away.

"So, like I was saying," said Derpy. "Even if that wasn't a date, this is a good next step."

"Okay, why?"

"Well, what do you know about Thunderlane? And furthermore, what does he know about you?"

Raindrops placed a hoof to her muzzle and stuck a thinking attitude. "Well, I know he's a good flier," she said. "And he's a real gentlecolt. He loves his brother Rumble, and the reason he wants to become a Wonderbolt is so that he can be a good role model. That's, about it."

"Okay, that's not a bad start," said Derpy with a thoughtful nod. "But let's flip that around. What does he know about you?"

"That I'm a real klutz, but despite that, he can still count on me?" said Raindrops with a shrug. "That and I understood the responsibilities of being a Wonderbolt long before he did."

"Yeah, that's not as good," said Derpy. "And that's why you need to ask him out on a date. It gives him a chance to see you in a different light, and you'll end up learning more about him, too. Like I said, openness is key in any relationship."

"Yeah, but I'm not sure I'm ready to be that open yet," said Raindrops. "I mean, I know he at least likes me as a friend, but I don't know if he likes me as a special some... As a soul... Like I do. If I ask him out on a date, he might say that he doesn't see me that way. I don't know if I can handle that kind of rejection."

Derpy sighed. "Raindrops, that's silly talk. And you're only hurting yourself by thinking that."

"Mama's right," Dinky chimed in. "You shouldn't hide your feelings just because you're scared."

"I know, I know," said Raindrops. "But, what do I say to him? How do I tell him how I feel?"

"We can't answer that, 'Drops," said Derpy somberly. Her expression then brightened as an idea hit her. "But, we can help you answer that yourself."

"Huh? How?" asked a confused Raindrops.

"My previous script idea was a flop because it was full of stuff that you weren't comfortable saying," said Derpy. "Well, how about you write your own script?"

Raindrops raised an eyebrow. "Derpy, I'm already having trouble saying my feelings out loud. How the heck am I gonna get them down on paper?"

"Easy. We'll brainstorm with you," said Derpy. "Right, Dinky?"

"Right!" said Dinky with an enthusiastic nod. "I'm gonna go get a quill and some parchment!"

Before Raindrops could say anything, Dinky was off like a shot. Raindrops sighed.

"I don't think this'll work," she said.

"Well, yeah, if you're gonna be that way about it," said Derpy, folding her forelegs. "C'mon, 'Drops! Have a little faith in yourself!"

Raindrops couldn't help but smirk. "It's not that easy for me, Derpy. But for you, I'll try."

"Don't try for me, 'Drops," said Derpy sagely. "Try for yourself."

Raindrops blinked. "What?"

"Yeah, that made a lot more sense in my head," said Derpy sheepishly. "A lot of stuff does. You know how it is."

Raindrops chuckled. "All too well, Derpy."


"Hmm, let's see here... 'I really really really really really...' No, that's stupid."

Raindrops crumpled the piece of parchment she was writing on into a ball and tossed it into the growing pile behind her.

"Ms. Raindrops, I don't mean to complain, but you said that about everything you wrote so far," said Dinky.

"Sorry," said Raindrops. "I, just can't find the right words. I can't even write out lo-the word that rhymes with dove without causing my heart to flutter."

"Maybe you're going about this the wrong way," said Derpy. "If you're having trouble being direct, then list some stuff you like about him and work from there."

"Well, okay," said Raindrops, tapping her lips with her quill. "Hmm, well, I like his reasons for wanting to become a Wonderbolt."

"Yes, that's a good start," said Derpy. "Write that down."

Raindrops did so. "Um, I also like how chivalrous he is."

Derpy tilted her head. "I didn't know Thunderlane was a knight."

Raindrops sighed. "Derpy, you don't have to be a knight to be chivalrous. You just have to show courtesy to mares."

"Isn't that just being a gentlecolt?"

"It's the same thing."

"So a gentlecolt is the same thing as a knight?"

"No, Derpy."

"Ugh, I'm so confuzzled."

Raindrops rubbed the bridge of her nose with her hoof. "Of course you are."

"I'll explain it later, Mama," said Dinky. "I think that's a great trait to admire, Ms. Raindrops. Write that down."

"Okay," said Raindrops, scribbling the note onto the parchment. "Hmm, what else? Well, I really like his, mane."

"You do?" asked Derpy. "'Cause it always confused the heck outta me."

"Well, that's just the thing," said Raindrops with a giggle. "It's so, unique. It's the same reason I like Cloudchaser's mane."

"Yeah, I still don't know who that is."

"She's talking about Stormwalker, Mama," said Dinky.

"Oh~. Right, her. Yeah," said Derpy, although it still didn't sound like she understood. "Anyway, I'm not sure about that one, 'Drops. Saying you really like a pony's mane is the oldest pickup line in the book. At least that's what I heard."

"Even so, I think Thunderlane would appreciate it if I complimented his manestyle," said Raindrops, scribbling on the parchment. "Hmm, I can't really think of anything else off the top of my head."

"Well, that's why you gotta ask him out," said Derpy. "You'll learn more about him, and when you do, there's gonna be more stuff about him that you love."

Raindrops brushed the back of her head. "I, kinda see your point, but I don't want to call it a date. Not yet, anyway."

"Why not?" asked Derpy.

"Because it makes me uncomfortable," said Raindrops. "I wanna take this one step at a time."

Derpy shrugged. "Well, I think that's silly, but you do what you want, 'Drops."

"Okay," said Raindrops. "So, where should we go?"

"Why not ask him to join you for breakfast at Sugarcube Corner?" suggested Derpy. "I'm taking Dinky and Ammy there as a treat tomorrow, so I'll be there to give you moral support."

Raindrops pondered this for a moment, and then nodded. "Sounds like a plan," she said. She then looked out the window, and her expression drooped. "Oh, but the sun's starting to set. I don't think I should interrupt his dinner or anything."

Derpy smirked. "No worries, 'Drops. I know the perfect solution."

"What's that?"

"Just write him a letter."

"But, it won't reach him until tomorrow morning."

Derpy's smile broadened. "I'll make one extra delivery today, just for you."

Raindrops gave Derpy an apologetic smirk. "Oh, I couldn't ask that of you, Derpy. I mean, what about Dinky and Amethyst?"

"It's fine," said Dinky. "Mama has a big heart like that, and that's what I love about her. Besides, it's not that late. She'll be home for supper. Right, Mama?"

"Of course I will, Muffin," said Derpy, nuzzling her child's ear with her muzzle.

"Well, okay. But only because you insist," said Raindrops, taking another piece of parchment. She then gave Derpy a warm smile. "Thanks, Derpy. You're a real pal."

"Not just a pal," said Derpy with a wink. "I'm your best pal."

"And I wouldn't have it any other way," said Raindrops with a light chuckle. She began to write her letter when a thought struck her. "Oh, how will I know if he accepted?"

"Don't worry. You'll know," Derpy assured her.

Raindrops shrugged and went back to writing her letter. I guess I can't argue with that, she thought. After all, Derpy knows what she's doing. I hope...