Epic Battle 1
It was a dark night in los pegasus, and stargazer was keeping guard on the perimeter of the city. The moon shone like a spotlight in a dark abyss, and the stars twinkled in the dark indigo sky. The sapphire-blue alicorn scanned the perimeter once more with a careful, watchful eye. A cloud passed by the moon in the star-streaked sky. She had heard that her old enemy, Black lightning, was returning. Black Lightning was an old pest, an evil changeling stallion that loved to terrorize the town, and pick on her. Today, though, she felt she was ready, should he happen stop by to cause trouble. The alicorn saw a black Pegasus approaching the perimeter, and quickly stopped to block the stallion's path. "State your business, Pegasus."
"Oh, come on now, don't you try to look fierce again, Stargazer."
Her eyes widened, as he dropped the disguise. Standing in front of the surprised alicorn guard, was the black form of Black Lightning.
Black Lightning laughed, as he approached.
"Sill ambitious as ever, I see. I don't think you ever learn."
"I'm not letting you come in. Last time, you forced your way in. I'm not letting you do that again."
"Who said you had to? I'll make a way in there!" he growled as he charged forward.
Stargazer moved to block his path, and kicked the changeling in the face. The changeling snarled as he stepped back, wiping a small amount of blood from his face. His green compound eyes were full of loathing, as he stared at the alicorn. A dark thought came to mind, as he teleported behind the alicorn. Before Stargazer could do anything, he blasted her with a stun spell. She fell with a gasp of surprise to the ground.
"You foal! I'll get you for this!!"
He laughed evilly, and stepped closer, leaning his head close to stargazer's. "I don't think so, you alicorn pest. With you out of the picture,, I could do anything i want!"
She broke his spell with a simple horn glow, and rammed her horn in his gut. He gasped in surprise, and fell limply to the ground. "You won't be coming back here any more." she said simply, and turned her back to the limp body, assuming that he was dead. But the changeling wasn't dead, as he picked himself off the ground. Her ram had missed the vital point of a kill, but he charged the surprised alicorn, knocking her to the ground. Almost immediately, he grasped a hoof to his bleeding injury.
"H-how did you survive?" She stammered.
"You fell for the oldest trick in the book, Stargazer, but I'm gonna make sure you'll be the one that won't be returning here at all!"
He ignited his horn, and touched the point to Stargazer's. Stargazer's eyes widened, and with a simple flash, she fell unconscious..As her wings dissapeared, he grabbed a few of the five-colored feathers and turned her to a filly. To finish the job, He wiped all her memory, except for her name. "Now to make sure you stay gone!" he hissed, as he ignited his horn again in green magic. The filly disappeared in a white flash, and Black Lightning, who was injured, slinked back into the Everfree to dress his wounds.
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Um... the characters seem a little flat. There's also not enough context in the chapter.
Sorry to say that.
3174809 Fixed, my dear.
To be honest, the grammar in this one is not bad. A couple uncapitalized proper nouns, a few mix-ups with punctuation, and maybe a few misspellings. As for story development, its pretty good.
3230163 Flames- Working on that.
3266027
Good to hear.
Los Pegasus should be capitalized. The first Lightning in Black Lightning is not capitalized. "His green compound" sentences first word is not capitalized. Then you have a couple I's to fix. Last you have a double period between unconscious and as.
Random alicorn OC, an unexplained and unmotivated villain whose actions are of the 'arson, murder, and jaywalking' sort (he terrorizes the town! and he picks on meeee
), random fillification and transportation to the Mane Six? 
Sorry, and I don't want to be mean, but this needs a lot of work. :| The characters lack personality and backstory, and with OCs, the audience doesn't know them - so you need to introduce them. Now, having a heroes-and-villains showdown in the middle of a city is a pretty cool introduction for a superhero and supervillain, but you want the audience to get to know your characters before diving into the action, which you don't do. We just have to take for granted that there's a random Alicorn in Las Pegasus with an overpowered Changeling rival, and then watch them duke it out.
Then onto Stargazer herself. Alicorn OCs are a bad, bad idea, unless they're very well explained or there's a good reason for them to be there. Alicorns are very rare and very powerful, and having an alicorn OC like this automatically comes across as a Mary Sue or authorial wish fulfillment. Due to their rarity as a breed, you also have to explain why nopony had ever heard of them before, where they came from, et cetera.
Thirdly - Black Lightning. What exactly are his motives? Right now, he just seems motivated by the drive to be eeeevil! and kick puppies and make rude gestures at nuns. That's very flat - more of a caricature than a character. And if he has enough power to turn his rival into a filly, erase her memory, and transport her halfway across Equestria, especially on a whim, then he's powerful - more so than an ordinary changeling would merit. I'd expect that kind of power from Chrysalis. Or that kind of behavior from Discord. But as it is, he's just as inexplicable as Stargazer. Also obfuscatingly stupid, really. It would be much simpler to just kill her. Would take a lot less effort and power. There's no reason for him to do that intentionally. It'd work much better if some kind of spell backfired and turned her into a filly and knocked her unconscious, and after some thought, he decided he didn't want to kill her, not like this - so he capitalized on the situation and wiped her memory, then teleported her away for good measure. That would go a long way in making events less schizoid, and give him a bit of character, too.
You've also got a tendency of haphazardly capitalizing/not capitalizing your I's, and you put thoughts into italics sometimes and put them in normal text in others. You need consistency, or your readers won't be able to tell what's going on.