Varia Visive

by journcy

Tempera Degree (Slice of Life)

Prompt #535: "A Fate Worse Than Death"

"I'm not going to kill you. I'm going to break you."

---

A bright, bright light flicked on. Rarity closed her eyes in discomfort, and tilted her head away from what appeared to be the ceiling.

"Hey! Look back at the light! It doesn't work if you aren't looking at the light!"

"...hmm?" Rarity wasn't quite sure who was behind that voice, but--

"Rarity, you gotta look at the light!" Pinkie Pie said, bouncing into view. In fact, Pinkie Pie was the only thing in her view; the rest of the room was shrouded in darkness, as the light from the lamp above Rarity only shone far enough to illuminate the pony before her (and to cause irreparable damage to her corneas, Rarity was sure).

"Why must I look at the light, Pinkie Pie?" Rarity said, drawling. "I'm afraid it's quite painful."

"Oh! Is it? I'm sorry, I must have it turned up too far. Hold on, lemme..." Pinkie's voice drifted off as she moved out of view. Rarity tried to turn to follow her, but realized that her hooves were tied down to the arms of the chair she was sitting in, and that her chest was similarly restrained to the body of the chair.

A loud click sounded, and the intensity of the light dropped quite a bit. Rarity still wasn't sure she wanted to stare directly into it, however.

"While that is better, dear, I still don't understand why you want me to stare at it," Rarity said.

"I'm interrogating you, silly! How can I interrogate you without a light in your face? It's classic!" Pinkie responded, entering Rarity's view once more.

"Interrogating me? I'm sure I have no idea why! I demand an explanation!" Rarity exclaimed.

"Oh, don't you?" Pinkie said, her voice growing coy. "And you're sure you wouldn't be willing to tell me anything about the others, not even if..." At this, Pinkie whipped out a large white featherduster from behind her back. "I tickle you to death?!"

Rarity opened her mouth in mock terror, though internally she was just the teeniest bit afraid. Pinkie stared at her captive, pulling herself in very close. She quivered as she looked. A moment passed.

Pinkie backed off of Rarity. "I see. Well, nothing for it!"

"Wait, wh-"

Pinkie brought the featherduster to bear, sweeping it back and forth across Rarity's hind hooves with the practiced motions of an expert in her medium. Caught by surprise, Rarity had no time to prepare, and a giggle escaped.

"Ha! I knew it! You do know something!" Pinkie said, ceasing her tickling.

Recomposing herself, Rarity put a stern look on her face. "I have no idea why you'd believe such a thing! It was simply a laugh! You are quite good at using that featherduster, I must say."

"Oh, am I?" Pinkie said, and went back to tickling Rarity ferociously. Rarity was ready this time, though, and despite Pinkie's skill in tickling, she managed to keep herself from laughing.

"Ooh, you're good! But I'm sure that you know where their base is, and that's information I need!" Pinkie said, and redoubled her efforts.

Many ponies throughout history have been renowned for one reason or another--strength, or wit, or benevolence--but never was a feat of will so amazing as this one ever witnessed on the face of Equestria, nor would one after. Pinkamena Diane Pie was the pony that schoolhouse foals told horror stories of, for her incredible skill in eliciting a laugh, giggle or smile by tickle within moments. Nopony could withstand her might, whether she had a feather, a featherduster, or nothing at all.

Rarity resisted the temptation to burst out laughing and squirming for two minutes and thirty-seven seconds.

It was the longest two minutes and thirty-seven seconds of her life.

But eventually, finally, she broke. She cracked a smile. Maybe a murmur of a giggle escaped her lips. Pinkie noticed, and her own grin grew wider. Rarity twitched. Then, a laugh. Then, she jerked her hoof. Then...

"Bahahahahaha!" Rarity cried out. "Oh my, oh, dear, Pinkie, I'll-- I'll tell you! Everything I know!"

Pinkie's grin sealed itself on her face as she pulled a notepad and pencil from her mane.

"They- they keep the flag just outside of Ponyville, under the--"

Rarity was cut off by the sound of a door being kicked in. Light streamed into the room, revealing it as a nondescript wooden shack. A clattering noise was heard, and color streaked across Pinkie's coat.

"Gotcha!" Rainbow Dash cried.

[TIME]

"Aww, I had just gotten her to start talking," Pinkie said. She reached up and pulled the cord on a different light fixture. This one actually illuminated the room, and the light was warm. She switched off her interrogation lamp.

"Sorry Pinks," Dash said, walking into the room. "You shoulda known that Rarity is almost impossible to crack." She was followed by the rest of their friends, all wearing heavy gear and carrying paint guns. Fluttershy and Applejack had paint streaked across their chests as well.

"I'm so happy that we've been having such a great time playing paintball!" Twilight said. "This really was a good idea for our anniversary, Rainbow."

"Heh. Told ya!"

Author's Note:

Sorry not sorry for random Omniship at the end ;D (and also for ponies playing paintball for some reason???)