“Where’s my hand? Oh there’s my hand, why’s it over there? Oh wait, that’s my foot. I’m having a dilemma, I can’t find my hand…”
“I’m going to fill her honeycomb with my honey.”
“The heater just turned on, it sounds like angry bees.”
"It's hard to count. 1, 2, 7, 4. Is it tomorrow yet?"
"Troy, the most uninteresting man in the world."
"It's-a-me! Fuck-yo-shit!"
"I'mma go all Mama-Mia all up on your ass!"

All of these have a story, just ask, i dare you.

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"Gay is a life choice, being lesbian is just kinky."
" Ya'know, life is kinda fucked up. It's like going in for a dental exam and then...oh, that's not a tongue depressor."
"There's always that one house that gives out candy on Halloween that never turns their lights on, assholes."
"All those 'Pink is manly' shirts, yet they don't make them in plus sizes."
"Jergen der gerdener."
"Ich spiele katze."
"One time i was walking in the woods and then...wait no that's the movie i just watched."

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[9:40:11 PM] Dylan: dOOM!
[9:40:14 PM] Dylan: Doom!
[9:40:19 PM] Dylan: Prepare the Summons!
[9:41:15 PM] Shadow: Yes m'lord
[9:41:23 PM] Shadow: JEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
[9:41:23 PM] Dylan: JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
[10:04:58 PM] Dylan: PREPARE THE SECONDARY MEASURES!
[10:05:09 PM] Dylan: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEJ
[10:05:26 PM] Shadow: o7

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Whelp. Shitpost time. I feel like I'll do these more often, because yes.

So this time in the life of Quigz, forgot to take them wierd ass meds that clear lung fluid, had a coughing fit, and broke one of my teachers. Funniest shit I've seen all week.

Also, Since mothersday was yesterday, I bought like 5 pounds of flowers and buried my mother alive with them, or more or less just put them all over her bed with some breakfast and shite. Breakfast was on a table, not the bed.

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[10:01:32 PM] Dylan: Doom!
[10:01:40 PM | Edited 10:01:45 PM] Dylan: Prepare....
[10:01:43 PM] Dylan: THE SUMMONS!
[10:05:32 PM] Shadow: JEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
[10:05:38 PM] Dylan: JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
[10:06:14 PM] Dylan: IT NEEDS MORE UMPH, MS. SKARLET!
[10:06:37 PM] Dylan: MORE CROCKATOWA, SIR SPAKSBOTTOM
[10:07:20 PM] Shadow: WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE MISS KRAKOPELTOP
[10:07:44 PM] Dylan: MY LANGUAGE IS PERFECLY FINE, ADMIRAL JARJAR

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So this lady came up in a silver autism awareness mustang, slowed down, said "horrible", then drove away while I was walking my dog.

I said out loud after she left, "What the f*yay*?"

Weirdest event in my life so far.

It's been a month since I started my job. As you may have noticed, my Fimfiction activity has actually increased of late, since I can't actually do anything. I finally found out why yesterday: The company isn't licensed to create another GitHub account, so they need to clean out an old one, including any potentially useful tweaks that haven't been pushed to the master branch. The end result is that my ability to live the dream and get paid for reading fanfiction will likely be coming to

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Rodrigo Duterte, President of the Philippines, called President Obama a "son of a whore" as he vows not to be lectured by the US leader on human rights when they meet in Laos tomorrow.

So Fuzzyfervert got 100 words into the story, and immediately stopped to create this wonderful piece of fanart that probably makes as much sense as the tagged story.

Art below the break.

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---> Full Chapter <---
===> The Comic Book <===