“Nightmare Moon is Coming to Town!”
by Jade Dawn

TNightmare Moon is Coming to Town!

• MLP: FiM
• Comedy
• Random

A certain mare of darkness invades a small town in New Jersey. Chaos and a general feeling of "What on Earth is going on?" ensues.

• Alt. Universe
• Human
• Nightmare Moon

Jade Dawn · 12k words  ·  33  8 · 1.6k views

Alternate universes or other worlds have become a trope ever since Dorothy landed in the Land of Oz. And while many stories take the route of seriously examining how characters from one world would respond to another, Jade Dawn follows the other path and demonstrates the ridiculousness of it all.

Most of the comedy is situational. While you will find attempts at humorous dialogue, one of the flaws of this story is that the exchanges between the characters come off as stiff in many places. Thus much of the humour in between the beginning and end are largely transient and lose their impact quickly.

That’s not to say the situational humour is not funny enough on its own. The ending gives a good laugh by leaving the reality of Nightmare Moon’s fate up to the imagination. The characters Matt and Anthony present almost a dry disregard for the grandiose desires of Nightmare Moon by the end, which is completely antithetical to the villain’s goals. 

Overall, rating it in the context of comedic stories, I’d give this a 7/10 for its ending, though getting invested in the humour can be difficult in the beginning due to the stiffness of the writing.

P.S I realize there is a "bonus" chapter, but since this was marked as extra content by the author, thus not part of the core story, this review does not take the bonus into consideration.

7221178
Thanks for the review!

Yeah, this was one of those things that I wrote really early in my years around here. I wrote it on a whim, really. Truth be told, I still kinda want to revisit the idea of Nightmare Moon invading Earth in some fashion, and done much better of course.

7/10 ain't bad, I guess. Honestly, I thought it'd get much lower than that. :)

7221197
No problem! Yeah, I think humour is one of those things that can vary a lot more than other genres, so I scored it as if I were someone who really enjoyed this kind of comedy.