There's this comedy I read some years back and every now and then it still pops into my head. It was freaking hilarious and I can't read because I don't remember the title.

Starlight glimmer was in a few scenes so it was written after her redemption and it followed Twilight learning that every hundred years the princesses hold mock funerals so they can reset that birthdates and feel younger.

They even drew causes of death out of a hat and Twilight kept getting really perverted deaths so they kept letting her draw another one. Cadence was like, "you're getting all the good ones."

Finally they said whatever the next one was she had to stick with it, so naturally she drew anal trauma.

Then proceeded to fall down the stairs just as several ponies were carrying up boxes of broken glass and rusty nails.
XD then at the bottom of the stairs her friends were like, "Twilight, we hardly knew ye," and she was like, "take me to a hospital..."

I was taking some edibles the other day and I thought about this scene and I laughed so hard I couldn't breath then I started running out of oxygen and still couldn't breath. I thought, "oh god, this is how I die." but don't worry, I managed to force down some air.

Unless I didn't and this is purgatory. Then finding the title to this story must be my unfinished business. Please help me cross over into the next life.

Anyways.

The whole idea of the mock funeral was them to be put into a sorta death like sleep so ponies could come up and say things they'd never be able to tell them under normal circumstances, but what they don't know is that the princeses are actually using a astral projection spell to listen in. Twilight hears some things xD i only remember starlight glimmer's confession though.
Her redemption had been a lie and she was just getting closer to her to plan a better revenge but she fell in love with Twilight along the way! XD lmao

Please, if anyone knows the title I'd be eternally grateful.

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I believe this is The Random Royal Funeral by Darth Link 22:

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That's it! Turns out my memories weren't completely accurate but I got the gist of the scenes.

Thank you so much, you wouldn't beleive how many times I've tried finding this story.