Continuing '14th C' and 'Homecoming', Haitus for 'New Blood', marking 'Shelter-in-Vlog' as complete · 1:44am Dec 22nd, 2021
Hi folks. I'm not dead. Sorry to those of you who were worried about me.
I'm having to take a step back and be realistic about mental exhaustion and what it takes to write.
Some stories will not get dropped, ever, barring death or coma. A 14th Century Friar and Homecoming are so near and dear to my heart that I will not abandon them. Updates may slow or stop, but they will come.
However, some stories have, by necessity, dropped down the priority list. The New Blood will be going on indefinite haitus. I have had very limited energy to write, and other stories take priority. I hope to finish it one day - it was never going to be that long, so when I say 'indefinite haitus' it's not just a shadow cancellation; I genuinely may pick it back up, but I have no idea when (or if) that may be. Bottom line, leave the notification bell on, but don't expect anything soon.
I am genuinely sorry for those of you hoping for an update, but I have neither the time nor the energy to work on it, and I wanted at least to be honest with you about the reality of the situation rather than leaving it eternally incomplete.
Shelter-in-Vlog, however, is going to be marked as 'complete.' I may add another chapter someday if the urge hits me, so leave the notification bell on, but, realistically, I might never have the urge. It was never going to have a beginning-middle-end like other stories. It was always, "As I have inspiration, I'll write," and, to be honest, I haven't had the drive or inspiration.
There's more to it than that, and at some point I may well write up a sort of closing chapter to go into that, but I won't make any promises when or if it will come. Part of it, I will say, is that the premise involved the lockdown and... I'm not in lockdown anymore. That's not to say I'm not being reasonably cautious but... after a certain point, we just have to live.
I do not say this lightly - a close friend and mentor of mine who had a major hand in shaping my life died from COVID. But, at the same time, I'm mindful of the fact that I've had close friends and mentors die of cancer, injury, old age, and a host of other maladies.
I think C.S. Lewis put it best when he was responding to people asking, "How do you live with the possibility that you could be killed by a nuke tomorrow?" He said in reply:
"In one way we think a great deal too much of the atomic bomb. ‘How are we to live in an atomic age?’ I am tempted to reply: ‘Why, as you would have lived in the sixteenth century when the plague visited London almost every year, or as you would have lived in a Viking age when raiders from Scandinavia might land and cut your throat any night; or indeed, as you are already living in an age of cancer, an age of syphilis, an age of paralysis, an age of air raids, an age of railway accidents, an age of motor accidents.’
“In other words, do not let us begin by exaggerating the novelty of our situation. Believe me, dear sir or madam, you and all whom you love were already sentenced to death before the atomic bomb was invented: and quite a high percentage of us were going to die in unpleasant ways. We had, indeed, one very great advantage over our ancestors—anesthetics; but we have that still. It is perfectly ridiculous to go about whimpering and drawing long faces because the scientists have added one more chance of painful and premature death to a world which already bristled with such chances and in which death itself was not a chance at all, but a certainty.
“This is the first point to be made: and the first action to be taken is to pull ourselves together. If we are all going to be destroyed by an atomic bomb, let that bomb – when it comes – find us doing sensible and human things—praying, working, teaching, reading, listening to music, bathing the children, playing tennis, chatting to our friends over a pint and a game of darts—not huddled together like frightened sheep and thinking about bombs. They may break our bodies (a microbe can do that) but they need not dominate our minds.”
I am grateful that Shelter-In-Vlog has helped people through these tough years. I am truly glad that it helped people, as Lewis put it, do "sensible and human things."
I don't want to minimize that or dismiss it's relevance. But I can't get into the headspace to write in it anymore because the circumstances that shaped it are no longer in play in quite the same way. I'm not locked down. I haven't been for many, many months now. Other things have changed too, and there are other reasons I no longer feel the drive to write Shelter-in-Vlog the same way.
Will I find other ways to communicate what I conveyed in that story? Possibly. But I don't want people waiting for a chapter that may never come.
Again, I am truly sorry if people are disappointed by this, but I'd rather give you closure than potentially empty promises.
Thanks for the update. Here's looking forward to whatever you have on the docket.
A wise man Mr. Lewis.
While somewhat disappointing, since this is just for fun and/or practice for you, I think it's very understandable to not have the energy to write something. If anything, I'm genuinely very sorry work has developed such that you, presumably, find it quite draining.
As for the other part, I think most of us haven't been in full-on lockdown in a while. I've been taking college classes since fall last year, as well as working a part time job since May. I mask up whenever I go out, bring multiple to work so I have dry ones if I get sweaty, and recently got my booster.
While I have extremely harsh words for those still unvaccinated, downplaying the potential severity, or flat-out denying the existence of a worldwide pandemic that's killed millions, I can't fault people wanting to live their lives. I haven't seen many family members in a while, and I dearly miss them, and it's as much distance as health concerns delaying it at this point.
Thank you for your kind words. I look forward to your next entries, in whatever venue that may be.
Thank you for all the joy your writing has provided already.
Prayers for you.