Thoughts Half Baked #3 · 1:11am Apr 9th, 2020
Hello, and welcome to this third installment of the blog series where I go over semi-decent story ideas I'm not going to actually use. Because I have minor writer's block at the moment and want to get in more than a page of work this evening. Today, I'll be covering a random assortment of concepts.
This one was more of a mental exercise than an actual story (that would've be cliché as hell), being another iteration of the 'what if the elements of harmony were different' trope. One day, I wondered, with all of human history to pull from, which people would best represent each element? Some were obvious to me: Robin Williams for Laughter, Mansa Musa for Generosity, and Abraham Lincoln for Honesty. But the others were less clear. Jesus or the Buddha for Kindness would probably offend somebody, regardless of who I went with. For Loyalty I wanted somebody who was wholly devoted to their ruler/general who died in their service, but a person with name recognition eluded me. And Magic was totally up in the air. If you guys have ideas, and want to try giving this a shot, by all means, let me know. Or write it yourself! For the record, the driving force behind travelling through time to gather everybody was going to be a prophecy from Nostradamus (whom I had as Magic), and the threat being addressed were the sirens, who'd been banished to our earth.
Next, a question. Has anybody here played Ring Fit Adventure? It's criminally underrated, and also criminally hard to find in stores currently, despite a sweet new free game mode update. Essentially, you partner with a magic talking Pilates ring to venture the land and stop an evil dragon from forcing people to overexert themselves to death. The premise of my crossover with it would have been as follows. Twilight, years into her rule, is neglecting her fitness, due to the lack of seasonal adventures. So, Discord and the Mane Six hatch a plan to whip her into shape again, which basically ends up recreating the game's world in Equestria. Sentient exercise equipment monsters, Discord as the magic ring, the whole nine yards. Twilight’s friends would be the bosses, each specializing in a muscle group, except Pinkie, who is the tutorial boss. Fluttershy for core, AJ for hooves, RD for wings, etc. I never bothered with this one because I wasn’t sure it would actually be funny. Especially since it would need to be kinda long, and may have gotten old after a few chapters.
Lastly, a recursive fanfic. Other than a ficlet for FoME’s Oversaturated World, I’ve never done one of these, but this old parody fic inspired me enough to almost go for it. Now, it’s a bit too late, as the author hasn’t added any new chapters in some time:
Now, Thought Prism, you may be asking, what sort of ridiculous nonsense were you going to add to this? Well, feast your eyes:
Maid Guy is the perfect foil for Cassandra. Both can do basically whatever the hell they want, logic and stakes be damned, the ultimate Mary/Gary. Cassandra is better at everything than everypony, and is supremely attractive. Kogarashi was a math professor at MIT, a world-reknowned chef, and has 37 senses. But, and here’s the kicker, he can’t be trusted, and will constantly spy on people, invade their personal space, the works. The story begins when he arrives in town and challenges Cassandra to an amazingness-off, to prove once and for all who the greatest is, with tests devised by Twilight and company. Naturally, Applejack dies during the strength contest she suggests, when Kogarashi’s thrown boulder just fails to hit escape velocity like Cassandra’s, rounds the planet, and squishes her.
Jeanne d'Arc comes to mind. Loyalty to the ideal even when betrayed by her people.
Nikola Tesla? Just one more way to rub the Wizard of Menlo Park's treachery in his face. Alternatively, you could focus on Magic's friendship aspect. Who's one of the most liked figures in history? (Oh dear, we're edging towards religion again, aren't we?)
... You know, this is starting to feel like a Grail War a la the Fate series.
Can't offer any input on the other two, though Twilight's friends tricking her into an exercise regimen is a fantastic idea that could work at pretty much any point in her life after Nightmare Moon (and maybe even earlier. Imagine Minuette organizing a scavenger hunt to get Twilight and Moondancer moving more.)
On the one hand, Buddha would only offend if you fail to do the research. On the other, considering "the Buddha" as a singular person is already something of a misstep, which is why you're supposed to kill him if you meet him on the road.
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I'm aware there's more than one bodhisattva. It's just that if I say Siddhartha Gautama, most people don't know who I'm talking about.
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And the fact that you even know the term "Bodhisattva" means you're probably in the clear as long as you incorporate that sort of knowledge and let the layman skip ahead to the Author's Notes if you're bothering to accommodate him at all. (Spellcheck insisted I capitalize it and I'm not going to argue because this isn't like with Pegasus)
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Oh, and my preferred solution to "most people wouldn't know what that is" is to turn the relevant words into a link to the relevant Wikipedia page. Unless it's part of a story, in which case I leave a similar link in the description, author's note, or whatever similar functionality the site I'm using has. If the site doesn't actually support hyperlinks, then I at least remind people that Google and Wikipedia exist.