Rage Review: Resist and Bite (Chapter 5) · 5:30am Mar 22nd, 2020
Chapter 5: Questions
So now Charlie is an Alicorn.
"Ahh! My height! What happened to my height?!" Charlie panicked.
"What do you mean? What's wrong?" Luster Dawn asked with a perplexed expression.
"What's wrong?" Charlie grumbled loud enough for her to hear, then he looked at her and said "What is wrong is that I used to be one-hundred and eighty-two centimetres tall but now! I am now the height of a human child!"
The main issue here isn't that you're short. It's that you have become a horned and winged equinoid. You're no longer physically human.
Really, Charlie should read some Jack L. Chalker novels.
Also, Luster Dawn, I get why you think being an Alicorn is nothing but wonderful, but you should remember that Charlie was originally Human, and an imposed bodily transformation is understandably scary.
"An alicorn is a very unique and powerful creature that can produce many magic and other sorts of cool stuffs. And they are rarely seen except for Princess Twilight Sparkle of course." Luster Dawn delineated.
Yes. Unique. Powerful. "Other sorts of cool stuffs."
"Wait wait wait." Charlie said with a shake of his head "So what your telling me is that I am a very rare creature that can do all sorts of unique stuffs like magic. And I am the same as your Princess or ruler?" He asked.
More or less, yes. I forgive Charlie for being slow to grasp this, given that he's just been subjected to a literally "traumatizing" shock.
"Pretty much." Luster Dawn said with a shrug "But, they are a very intelligent species in Equestria." She told him.
Charlie was even more perplexed when he heard her saying that an 'Alicorn' is a very intelligent and husky specie.
I am perplexed, too. While all five known Alicorns in canon are very intelligent, they were apparently very intelligent before becoming Alicorns as well. And Luster Dawn should know this, because she knows at least one Alicorn fairly well.
And if Twilight Sparkle was an alicorn, why couldn't she defeat the Chinese army easily with her magic thing?
Has Author taken this long to realize the obvious flaw in the whole first part of Story?
Really, barring some sort of intelligence or magic suppression field, or both there's no way that General Metal Pads could have pulled off that victory.
Luster Dawn then asks Charlie some questions:
"Here's my first one." She told him "What kind of creature are you? Before you transformed into an alicorn." She asked.
"Why I am a human, homo sapiens." He answered.
"Care to elaborate?"
"Um, no." He said with a shake of his head "I don't feel comfortable sharing classified and personal informations." He told her.
From whom are you keeping this secret, Charlie? From the Ponies? They'll soon enough have plenty of Humans to study.
From the Chinese? They are Humans.
From Luster Dawn personally? WHY?
Charlie then explains he's a student:
"M.I.T stands for Massachusetts Institute of Technology." He pronounced it in full form "The university campus is a private research university in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Founded in 1861 in response to the increasing industrialization of the United States which is another country. M.I.T also adopted an European polytechnic university model and stressed laboratory instruction in applied science and engineering." He delineated.
Luster Dawn's eyes widened in astonishment and had her mouth open in awe when she heard the information. It was like a book with thousands of pages.
"Wow, now that is cool." Luster Dawn said in astonishment.
Yeah.
You know, even speaking English, that translated to Luster Dawn as:
"M.I.T stands for (meaningless place name) Institute of Technology." He pronounced it in full form "The university campus is a private research university in [meaningless place name]. Founded in [meaningless date] in response to the increasing industrialization of the [meaningless place name] which is another country. M.I.T also adopted an [meaningless place name] polytechnic university model and stressed laboratory instruction in applied science and engineering."
So he's basically told her that he goes to a local campus of a widespread technical college in his world. Remember that these names have no cachet to her. And Equestria canonically has an advanced technology and a wide variety of universities, colleges and other schools, so it's not as if Charlie is introducing a Bronze Age barbarian to the concept of "technical colleges."
Luster Dawn's eyes widened in astonishment and had her mouth open in awe when she heard the information. It was like a book with thousands of pages.
"Wow, now that is cool." Luster Dawn said in astonishment.
Yeah, it's not as dull as being the trusted Favorite Student of an immortal monarch supergenius Archmage Gadgeteer who rules a continent-spanning empire, right?
I know LD is young and naive and innocent, but she's not supposed to be stupid ...
"Okay, here is my last question. What is those metal things attached to your circular thing? And why do you always carry them around with you?" She asked.
Charlie then looked at the gun and nightstick he stole from the Chinese police officer earlier back in Ponyville.
The obvious weapon whose close cousins she witnessed being used to murder a nameless yellow mare and shoot Twilight Sparkle and shoot at yourself with, and the club, Luster Dawn?
To make sweet little LD come off as even stupider, Equestria already has ranged personal weapons technology (bows and crossbows), gunpowder siege weapons (cannons) and, well, has probably had clubs since Ponies were Paleolithic.
"This is called a pistol. It is a type of handgun used by many police officers. It fires out a small projectile called a bullet once you pull this trigger here, and once you pulled the trigger. A loud noise will be produced and the bullet flies out of this small hole called a muzzle. The bullet flies at such a high speed, so fast that the naked eye can't even spot it. And once it hits you, it will go through your body and kill you instantly."
1. Luster Dawn has seen at least two Ponies get shot. One a close personal friend.
2. Pistol bullets will not reliably kill people (or Ponies), and certainly not instantly. The expected result of being shot once by a handgun bullet is wounding, though one can of course be unlucky.
Luster Dawn was both traumatized and petrified when she heard the information. She didn't knew that a small metal contraption like that can do such harm to somepony.
"That sounds brutal." Luster Dawn said with a petrified expression.
It's a weapon, LD. Do you think that the effect of being run through with a spear, or shot with an arrow or crossbow bolt, or blasted by a magical laser beam is that you feel great and want to do happy little dances? Seriously, how NAIVE are you?
"Indeed it is kid." Charlie said with a chuckle. Then he began to talk about the nightstick "And this metal stick is called a nightstick. It is roughly cylindrical club made of wood, rubber, plastic or metal. It is carried as a compliance tool and defensive weapon by law-enforcement officers, correctional staff, security guards and military personnel." He delineated.
Luster Dawn began to write down all of these awesome informations from Charlie.
It's a club. A slightly-fancy composite-material (mostly)-nonlethal club with a nice handgrip. Heck, Pony cops probably carry something similar, with a different grip. This isn't a freaking atom bomb or particle beam weapon here.
Charlie then asks Luster Dawn why the Chinese are invading Equestria.
"It all started out like this. I was having another normal lesson with my mentor Princess Twilight Sparkle. We were conducting some magic spells with some portal combinations technique. Everything was going well until I did an accident that I don't even know what happened." She told him.
Wait, Luster Dawn accidentally devastated Beijing? 
Charlie then explains "soldier," "SWAT" and "police" to Luster Dawn, which is amusing because the Equestrians in canon have equivalents of at least the first and last named personnel, but Charlie doesn't know it and Luster Dawn is apparently ignorant of this as well, because:
Luster Dawn was drastically petrified when she heard the information. These humans must be very violent and malicious.
Well, the Red Chinese are. But as I said, the Equestrians canonically have equivalents of these personnel, so Luster Dawn is clearly very naive. Has she never been to a big city? Has she never wondered what the Royal Guards are for?
Both Charlie the Hero and Adoring Lass are tired now from all the walking and exposition, so they go sleepies.
Actually, it might be a smart idea for Charlie to keep his humanity secret from the Chinese. On the one hand, it'd be less incentive for them to blackmail him with threats of destroying Australia with their new teleportation powers. On the other hand, it'd be more incentive for them to worry what other unexpected powers Equestria has to throw at them.
But then, "why I am a human" already gives away most of that secret, and "Massachusetts Institute of Technology" gives away most of the rest. (And we first saw him in Australia - does Story ever specify why he chose to be a foreign student?)
I'm guessing Luster Dawn is merely playing at being awestruck - she probably guessed that's what he'd react best to, or that's what would get the most information out of him. Inwardly, she's probably disappointed at how little useful information he's telling her.
*Gasp* a fellow Well World fan!! So hard to find those now adays.
But terribly fragile.
Perhaps worse than that, consider "circular thing." Not only does Luster not recognize a club, she also doesn't recognize a belt. Or possibly the very concept of clothing.
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I am entirely in favor of Luster playing up the "adoring young sidekick" role. No doubt Princess Twilight has told her cautionary tales of overpowered humans slipping through dimensional cracks and distorting the world around them. Better to play along than be labeled a "hater."
I swear, that explanation for the M.I.T. looks like it was taken straight off of Wikipedia.
Must be a great school if he's a tech wizard with his own personal lab, a battlefield surgeon, a survivalist, etc. At eighteen, too!
Says the guy who removed a bullet from a still very much breathing and not dead Twilight Sparkle, to the girl who had actually seen her get shot and not instantly drop dead. Seriously, why do a lot of stories like this make the ponies peaceful but stupid, and the humans slightly smarter in comparison but violent?
So glad to see you posting again.
It cannot be overstated how ridiculous it is that she's this naive considering that one, her mother is Starlight freaking Glimmer in this story, who... isn't the naive type, and even if she'd fail to teach friendship lessons properly to her child (one of the reasons I'm maybe iffy about being onboard with her being Sunburst's and Starlight's child, but I digress), you'd think she wouldn't be entirely sheltered in regards to what lessons she might have had imparted to her (Starlight, while nice and on the forgiving side as of S9 [probably a quite notably better person than Discord], is a more skilled and ruthless warrior than Twilight [in that she's quite possibly a more natural fighter, the epitome of what a unicorn battlemage might be], in my opinion, more willing to kill, a moral lesson I'd think she'd be willing to try to pass on to her child at some point, that it's more than okay to use lethal force, if necessary, unless she compulsively sheltered her) and two, Luster Dawn has canon awareness of how much Twilight and her friends accomplished... which would probably include the events of S9, where the Legion of Doom tried to kill them, same for Sombra, and you'd most assuredly think someone supposedly magically studious like Luster would try to gain an understanding of what sorts of magic they might've used, at least the basics of combat, out of curiosity.
ETA: Speaking of "curiosity," I think "curiosity" is a more plausible reaction than fear and horror, or whatever the crap LD is here, in regards to the weapons.
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That's a good point.
Twilight Sparkle, for her part, starts out as naive in some ways in Friendship Is Magic, but one thing she is not naive about is knowing that violence in defense of oneselves or one's allies, or in pursuit of an objective, is sometimes necessary. Regrettable, perhaps, and thus to be avoided if there is any better and safer course of action consistent with that objective, but necessary.
Notice how in numerous episodes, when Twilight faces unambiguous physical threats, she is quick to defend and if necessary counterattack. In the Quest of Nightmare Moon, she fights the Manticore, until Fluttershy manages to calm the creature, and of course she does battle with Nightmare Moon herself.
Twilight is brave and capable of cool and decisive action in the face of danger. She comes from a military family, and while herself more of a scientist than a soldier, is willing to carry out the role of a soldier and military commander when appropriate.
It's difficult for me to imagine a filly born to Starlight Glimmer and Sunburst, and mentored by Twilight Sparkle, who is is entirely ignorant of combat tactics, military history, or the need to think rather than merely react in a dangerous situation. It is, of course, possible to imagine Luster Dawn as a fool or coward, but then it rather begs the question as to why Twilight Sparkle would have taken her as her special student.
Twilight would of course be aware that a highly-trained Unicorn Mage, mistress of powerful and dangerous magic, might be called upon in the time of Equestria's need to risk her life in battle. After all, this is exactly how Twilight Sparkle's own career began, and she probably sometimes has dark thoughts about just how badly things might have gone had she performed poorly in the crisis.
(In fact, Twilight's seen the consequences of such failures, in the dystopian alternate world lines that Starlight Glimmer inadvertently created!)
It's possible that a fondly hoping Starlight and Sunburst, unaware of Luster Dawn's inadequacy, hoped that Twilight could turn LD around, and asked the Princess to tutor her as a personal favor. Twilight Sparkle is brilliant and powerful, but still fundamentally equine, and she can make mistakes like anypony else.
As you point out, what is harder to fathom is why the child of two geniuses who is raised by an even more intelligent genius, all three of them masters of various and practical disciplines, would fail to be at all curious when faced with alien culture and technology. Yes, the Red Chinese are behaving horrifically, but then Ponies have faced down horrors before, many times, and remained curious to learn things about them.
Sometimes the more so because of the horrific evils, because the first step to defeating anything is understanding its nature.
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Like, also, of course, against Chrysalis' Changeling Army, she proved herself willing to fight there, and a notable amount of other examples one can think of.
Indeed.
One moment that would've undoubtedly stuck out in Twilight's mind, and Spike's, and everyone else's really is this:
She came a hair's breadth of watching Chrysalis gleefully rip off her little brother's wings, due to her whims, and it would probably be more surprising if neither of them exhibited any PTSD/trauma-related symptoms at any point after that, for at least some time, if anything had ever affected them, aside from the aforementioned experience with timelines, before, I'd imagine it would've been something like that incident. It didn't help that she expected to die at that moment, hugging him and her friends to the end.
She can undoubtedly understand the consequences of if those three had killed her and her friends (which came close to happening), what manners of hell they would've unleashed upon the world, and it'd be more odd if it hadn't weighed on her mind, on more than one occasion, that sort of thing. She knows Chrysalis and the others are and were sadistic, she knows all three of them are probably liable to commit mass murder (nowhere is that more apparent than the Tirek and Chrysalis timelines; Tirek was burning everything for... some reason, and Chrysalis' Changeling accompanying her said "we barely escaped with our lives!"), and she knows that Nightmare Moon would've ruled as a tyrant if it weren't for her, and so on. All things that hypothetical thoughts of failure could weigh on your mind.
Indeed. Understanding how the enemy thinks is of great importance. If they can be reasoned with, or not, what's the best course of action accordingly, so on, so forth. Do they have obvious weaknesses to exploit, whether in their personality or otherwise?
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Right. Twilight's no Blood Knight, but she's willing to fight, and fight hard, when it's necessary. She's always been that way on the Show, and in her better semi-canonical and even non-canonical portrayals.
And yes. The Red Chinese are (both in Story and in real life) callous practicioners of Frightfulness, but are hardly the first ones Twilight Sparkle has faced. She's not some innocent sheltered filly who would collapse in shock at the use of rude words against her; for that matter, when she was not much more than an innocent sheltered filly, in Season One, she was still a courageous young mare, willing to stand up to evil or fight to protect her friends.