A Review: Spectrum of Lightning · 4:00am Mar 22nd, 2020
Author: Seriff Pilcrow
Have you ever kept a secret from somepony?
How about an entirely different life?
Twilight Velvet has definitely been less than honest with her family and friends, but now, so many years later, somepony stumbles upon the truth. Adventures long done, friendships that have withered to the barest of sparks—what will resurface as Twilight's true life is uncovered?
Summary: Twilight Velvet teams up with Daring Do to recover a lost artifact.
Thoughts:
I don’t think that I’m an easy guy to impress. Sure, I may be pretty lenient with scores and whatnot, but I’m very conservative giving out nines and tens. I didn’t even have a favorites bookshelf until like a month ago, and even then I don’t often update it. Now that’s not to say there aren’t some wonderful works on this site, but there aren’t many that I can definitively say ‘now this is a great work.’
You can probably see where I’m going with this. ‘Spectrum of Lightning’ is a great work. After I post this review it’s probably going directly into my top ten. And it’s not even done yet. Seriously. Spectrum is a well-crafted, fast-paced action story exploring the old headcanon that Daring Do and Twilight Velvet were somehow connected. Drawing inspiration from a plethora of fictional and real-life sources, the author delivers a brilliantly told action story that almost feels like it should be its own book.
Now all this being said, this is a review, so I’m still required to make some recommendations and suggestions to the author. Before I get into all of that, I want to say that the meat of this stuff will be very, very minor nitpicky stuff, because I quite literally don’t have anything else to talk about. It’s that well written.
Plot:
Spectrum follows two story lines: one set in the present, and one set in the past. The first follows Twilight and Spike as they visit Twilight’s parents in Canterlot. Spike discovers a hidden journal in the attic, which leads into the second arc: Twilight Velvet meeting and going on an adventure with Daring Do.
The majority of the story, obviously, sticks with the second plotline, but aspects of the first aren’t lost either. The question of why Velvet is lying to her daughter about her involvement is prevalent throughout the present day scenes, raising several other questions that keep the reader invested.
I guess the one thing I can say is that the scene changes may be jarring to readers who like to stay in one time period. The transitions between chapters Fourteen and Fifteen, for example, is so incredibly smooth that I almost missed that we had gone from past to present.
I think that readers will have adjusted by the time they reach this point, but if the author wants to, I’d recommend adding some time headers so it’s extra clear where the scene is taking place. But again, this is a super minor thing.
Besides that, the story is well balanced between high-octane action and quieter, introspective moments between the two main characters. This is a brilliant move not only stylistically wise, but because it also serves to highlight what exactly is at stake for Velvet here.
The most memorable parts of this story are probably the action scenes. I want to point out that fight scenes are by no means easy to right. The author, however, makes it look easy. Each fight scene is well choreographed and executed cleanly. If anything, I’m the one who needs to be taking notes here, because I can’t write fight scenes for anything.
(One little thing: I do like the eclair running joke, but I’m sure Daring is smart enough to think of other foodstuffs? Don’t get me wrong, I do like it, but some variation never hurt anyone. At least not that I know of.)
Characters:
The story centers around two main characters: Twilight Velvet and Daring Do. Both are academics, but not in the typical sense. I particularly enjoy Velvet’s raunchy attitude and how well they can play off of each other.
There are also a few support characters that make an appearance as well, and I really do like the development of Chief Thunderhooves here. However, I still find it a bit odd that he just happens to be so skilled in the area that Velvet needs help in, but since I enjoyed his depiction so much I can overlook this. I will say that I would have liked to see what the buffalo terminology for some of the objects were, as it seems like he doesn’t use the same names that ponies do. Or maybe he’s wise in the ways of pony technology?
Other than that, both characters very clearly have their strengths and weaknesses, and the author outlines them both strongly. In particular, we see how Velvet’s spontaneous decision to join Daring comes back to bite her, and how her lack of fighting skills becomes a problem. We also see her utilize her magical ability in creative and unexpected ways.
Daring on the other hand is a character that, although experienced, is a loner and isn’t used to having to deal with issues like morality. The two characters play off of each other incredibly well and behave in a completely believable and enjoyable way.
I guess one thing that I can say is how I thought Terra Volt was going to be a major villain in the first half of the story, but we don’t see her again after the car chase. This thematically is fine if the author is going to bring her back in chapter sixteen and River Rapids plays a bigger role anyways.
And one other thing, there is constant allusion to a big ‘boss,’ but it’s pretty start and stop. Perhaps more hints could be dropped by some mercenaries in their conversation? It could just be another mystery point to drive the story, but there’s plenty as is.
Grammar:
All in all, everything seems pretty solid. I did catch a few questionable punctuation issues and missing quotation marks here and there, but other than that it’s a well-polished fic.
One thing I do want to mention is that the author tends to use long sentences with a combination of dashes, commas and colons/semicolons. Grammatically it’s all safe and sound, but sentence variation is supposedly a good thing, so I’d recommend dividing some of these into separate sentences just for fun.
Besides the few punctuation issues, I didn’t notice any other major grammar issues. Well done!
Final Thoughts:
Honestly? I enjoyed this immensely. There where a few chapters where I didn’t take any notes at all because I was too immersed in the reading. And that’s a good thing! It’s not often nowadays that I can lose myself in a good story, fiction or otherwise.
Again, this was a challenge to review merely because I don’t feel at all qualified to review a work of this caliber. It was honestly hard to find things to talk about because everything is so well done. So to the author, excellent work! Keep it up!
To the Readers:
If you like Daring Do, adventure stories, or action, then why haven’t you read this yet? Seriously, go read it!
To the Author:
I’m terribly sorry I don’t have much to say, especially given the review you gave me. I feel like I’m selling you short, but really, I’m way out of my league here. I wish I could give you more pointers and aspects to improve on, but honestly this impressed me.
I do have my reading notes for your fic, if you would like to see them let me know.
Scores:
Plot: 10
Characterization: 10
Grammar: 9Average: 9.67
