Magisight: Chapter 23 · 7:38am Oct 20th, 2019
I'm typing this at 2:15 AM and trying to come up with something witty and clever to write about.
As you might have noticed, the pegasus-centric chapters are a bit more action focused, with lots of busy and exciting things going on. To be honest, I was a bit nervous about it, afraid it would be too much of a departure from the unicorn and earth pony chapters, so I hope you all are enjoying them! In general, the majority of this chapter was kept the same. Start off with a blizzard, deal with the storm/flood at Sweet Apple Acres, control a heatwave in the rest of town, and then end with some frantic research. The basics didn't change in the revision, but the original draft was... lacking. The descriptions weren't robust, the character some of the scene jumping was a bit too quick. It was very much a rough draft in every sense of the word.
Although, the very beginning had Twilight opening her window to the blizzard (with no foreshadow buildup cold from the night before, nor cliffhanger on the last chapter) while also humming "Morning in Ponyville shimmers," but I thought that would have been a bit too silly.
The frantic research at the end of the chapter was pretty bad in the draft, too. It felt almost too laid back with no tension or sense of urgency. So, I took portions of the research from 23's draft and shoved it into 22. For example, the weather factory in the South Luna Sea wasn't mentioned in 22's original draft at all; it was first mentioned in 23. Same with some of my weather factory lore, about them being mobile, and this ancient one being all mysterious and stationary. Well, that just wasn't gonna work now, was it? By narrowing the focus down for Twilight's frantic research in chapter 23, I was able to add to the tension, and then add some extra weather factory lore.
Okay it's 2:37 AM and I dunno what else to talk about. tldr; draft bad, revision good, please enjoy!
May the stars shine until the end of your journey!
-PK
