New Story (Also a Rambling Blog Post) · 10:56pm May 25th, 2019
I've had a weird relationship with my writing this year. I discarded a novel and put another on hold because I was not confident in my ability to write them. I've been reading a lot of books, but that has cut directly into my writing time (plus work and all). And despite announcing my retirement from fanfiction multiple times, my muse refuses to let the ideas go. I've talked in the past about how muses can be pushy bitches, and mine is no exception.
So I present, the last fanfic I will ever write...maybe. I often advocate for writing entire stories before publishing them (a lesson learned from my awkward first fanfictions). I've neglected that lesson here, partly because I don't know yet if this story is good, or perhaps because I'm still torn between wanting to go back to original fiction over fanfiction. And perhaps serial publishing still has a lesson to teach me.
I started writing this fic a while ago, and I loved some of the ideas in it. But I also felt strange spending so much time on something that wasn't my novel, or that I wasn't sure was good. So I've split the difference, and decided just to ignore my usual protocols: no editors, no finishing it before posting it. I didn't even submit it to EqD or post it at an intentionally opportune time to take advantage of site traffic.
Regardless of these ramblings, the takeaway for you, my audience, is simple. This fic isn't done, and it may not ever be. It might be self-indulgent, at once too similar and not similar enough to my other works. But it's here for you to read, and I didn't post it in my scraps collection. So we'll see how this goes. No one ever said creative endeavors were easy or logical. Sometimes giving in to instinct and feeling can work out, even when it flies in the face of lessons you've already learned. And well, sometimes it reinforces those lessons.
I feel people over think this whole 'retirment' thing. When you feel like writing fanfiction, do that. When you don't, don't. You don't need to retire, just do something else.
5065435 Yeah and that's fine for some people. The problem is that, for my entire writing career, I've had trouble with finishing things. I always jump from project to project, which means that most of them never get done.