Brainstorming A New Next-Gen AU: All The Crackships

Over the years, I've picked up a few ideas for interesting or unique romantic pairings that, I think, have some potential for storytelling. Maybe it was the lack of sleep or my recent Friends binge, but I had an idea late last night: what if I were to throw those all together and tell a (next-gen?) story in the new, much-more-awkward Ponyville?

The ships that I'm fond of, with sources, if I remember...

• Big Mac x Cheerilee: Big Mac and Cheerilee have been good, platonic friends ever since they were small, with no romantic attachments whatsoever. However, they ended up having sex while under the influence of the CMC's Love Poison (in "Hearts and Hooves Day"), and Cheerilee fell pregnant. Big Mac and Cheerilee are both loving parents, but are no more committed than that; perhaps Big Mac has even married Sugar Belle in the meantime.
• Applejack x Shining Armor: (mild spoilers for Dilarius's Southern Belle Applejack). Much to Applejack's surprise and shame, she fell pregnant after an ill-advised one-night stand, and decided to keep the child. The father (probably) has no idea.
• Rainbow Dash x ???: RD is the unwed teen mother of Scootaloo, with no idea who the father is. In this AU, RD would have dropped out of school and raised her foal on her own. Inspired by a scene in Jowijo's Someone Still Loves You.
• Rarity x Shining Armor: Someone suggested--can't remember where--that, when Rarity found out Twilight's brother was a royal guard, she would have started chasing after him. Think of all his social connections!! Not sure what this would look like, though--maybe they're friends with benefits, or she's his mistress, or maybe they're actually married (i.e., she got to him before Cadance could).
• Celestia x Shining Armor: I had an idea for a fic a long, long time ago, in which Chrysalis magically manipulated Celestia's emotions in order to get her to hook up with a mind-controlled Shining Armor, just before the Canterlot Wedding. This would make the relationship between Celestia and Cadance rather difficult--especially when Celestia became pregnant. Might be fun to resurrect that idea, but things are already rather complicated on the Shining Armor front.

Just a few random ideas. Might be fun to throw these all into Ponyville and see what happens, though. Any thoughts?

Comments

[FanOfMostEverything]

Luna probed the phenomenon with her magic. "Hmm. Fascinating."

"I know. Never thought my BBBFF had it in him."

"Judging by his paramours, he has much in—"

Twilight held up a hoof, going pale as she said, "Please don't finish that sentence, Your Highness. This is my brother we're talking about."

Celestia cleared her throat. In her best "chiding teacher" voice, she said, "I don't suppose the two of you would care to share your findings with the rest of us?"

"Indeed," said Rarity. "We trust you can at least explain what happened to Shining Armor?"

"Where he went?" added Cadence.

"An' why he did right after ya cast that paternity spell?" Applejack adjusted her hat like a general's helm.

"Well, the adrenaline in his system managed to sync his fight-or-flight reflexes and cornic lobe in such a way that he managed to reach safety without actually harming any of the mates who were threatening him." Twilight's lecturing smile gave way to another round of repressed retching as her brother and reproduction entered her mind at the same time.

"An' that means?"

"Put simply, fair Applejack, thy addition to his accidental herd was enough to send the young captain fleeing for another universe." Luna nodded at the ripple in spacetime. "A well-executed shift. We may need to partake of him Ourself upon his retrieval."

[PresentPerfect]

...I honestly don't like any of them. Like, I really hate all of them. c.c

[ponygrad]

I don't like them either, although I'd like MacLee if it was less creepy.

But I do like Rarity x Shining Armor. There's a fic All About Rarity I read a few chapters of that was really good.

[Elsaack]

I can see Rarity and Shining Armor, if Cadence didn't snag him first. Though Rarity has changed over the seasons, she isn't chasing after colts anymore. Maybe she has a steady secret lover; she seems the time to enjoy the drama of hidden rendezvous and taboo of married stallions.

Of course, I can see Shiny and a lot of the Mane 6. Except Twi, incest isn't really my thing.