REVIEW: Princess Celestia and The Summer of Royal Waves · 6:32am Jul 3rd, 2016
BUT FIRST LET ME WRITE 10 PAGES ABOUT THE HARRY POTTER BOOKS AND MOVIES. AND THEN I'LL COMPARE THEM TO INCEPTION
I'm kidding. that was just for that one book. and I don't really hate Inception, I just like to poke fun at it.
let's jump straight to the ponies.
you're still gonna get rambling digressions, though. 
Princess Celestia and The Summer of Royal Waves
by G.M. Berrow
being a princess not only means alicorn powers, but also getting your books in hardcover! take that, regular ponies! 
ahh, just the title alone feels so relaxing.
feel the wind in your mane, the waves under your hooves...
wait. this isn't that kind of show!
Now, this may come as a surprise to you, but FiM doesn't develop Celestia. at all. 
Shocking, I know!
She's always stuck as the "wise old mentor" role. she has so much magical power and social status, there's nothing stopping her from getting whatever she wants. How do you write an interesting conflict involving her?
well, you can't. not if you're Ted Anderson. in Friends Forever #3, Celestia accompanies Spike on an adventure to the mountains, where they form a cute bond together. but Celestia is still the powerful mentor, who watches but doesn't interfere, so her students can learn to handle things on their own. Yeah, you've probably seen this a hundred times in fanfics. even if it's true to character, it's really boring. doesn't inspire me to write fanfics about her. 
but what if we used her in a slice-of-life? in Micro-Series #8, Georgia Ball focuses on Celestia as the headmaster for the School for Gifted Unicorns. She tries to settle a dispute between the snobby parents and one of her most valuable teachers, without wanting to use her high status to force an opinion. It's a nice story, with fun magical antics, though the resolution is a little melodramatic. (Celestia is far more powerful and important than Dumbledore, but appears to get just as little respect for her school management decisions...?)
That's getting closer, but Celestia-as-headmaster feels too similar as Celestia-as-monach, always mediating between other ponies' conflicts. It does take a step in the right direction, removing all other familiar characters and taking a step back from the show. Celestia's been around a while, she has a life besides dealing with the Mane 6, right? She has 1000+ years of history, and has seen things you ponies wouldn't believe.
(honorable mention: Katie Cook's comic storyline where Celestia fell in love with Mirror-verse Sombra. I know it's controversial among fans, but I love it because it took a risk and dared to develop her character. I really cared about her in that story!)
I think G.M. Berrow finds the perfect balance here in this book. While Luna manages the kingdom for a while, Celestia travels to Monacolt (hee hee) to help an old friend with a problem at her magic academy. A little bit of vacation, a little bit of adventure too. Celestia is concerned about the students, who seem overworked, frightened into submission, and joyless. but Duchess Diamond Waves pushes them so hard, because she fears they're not prepared for the impending magical disaster they will have to face. Celestia steps in as a teacher, to bridge both sides with rock & roll music by showing how friendship is magic.
It becomes almost like a Harry Potter short story, told from the teacher's view. Kids should love it for the Hogwarts flavor, and they can identify with the cute unicorn students. Parents will likely empathize with Celestia and the Duchess, raising these children while trying to find the right balance between giving fun and discipline.
and for Bronies, finally here's a Celestia story where she gets to be herself, as a caring and patient parental figure, without all that baggage of Canterlot responsibility. She's taken out of her usual environment, but not out of her element, and nothing about her character has to be invented or rewritten to make it work. The students look up to her because she's a substitute teacher, not a foreign princess. Her magical powers don't matter, because she still has the possibility of failure. After all, Equestria is a world saved by the bonds of friendship, not individual ability. It's funny how often we forget that.
It fits so well with the spirit of the show and its message, reminding me of the fantasy-style episodes that Lauren Faust had the most involvement with (the Nightmare Moon pilot, and the Windigos). It's so rare to find fanfics that achieve this balance, and with arguably the most difficult character to write about. I wonder if the show will succeed when it does its own Celestia episode?
While starting to reread this book, I got distracted on the first page by the prose itself. I wanted to include some of this in the Luna book post, but it was getting too long already. This might be a better example, though.
The sunlight dappled across the castle floor in multicolored shards, softening the appearance of the checkered stones with warmth and energy.
That's the first sentence of the whole book, and I find it genuinely beautiful. It already evokes 3 senses: I can see it, and feel it, and smell it (Maybe the last one is just me, having memories of smelling sun-warmed stones). Compare it to the the common newbie cliche, "it was a beautiful day", which barely even engages the sense of sight, but not really. As I wrote about before, a cliche like that does not summon a visual image, but a stick-figure abstract concept.
Will little girls understand words like 'dappled' or 'shards'? I'm sure they'll be fine. When I was a child, my favorite books were the ones where I had to look up new words. Even in a children's book, you might have to keep the plot and dialogue direct and straightforward, but you don't have to be bland or condescending. 
I thought I was done, but..... ok, this same section gave me such a distracting epiphany. This book's only 135 pages, in BIG FONT, and it's not until page 5 that Luna appears and begins the actual plot. I'd like to copy the first 4 pages of the book, so I can explain what I discovered. please no ceaserino & desisterino, Hasbro.
The sunlight dappled across the castle floor in multicolored shards, softening the appearance of the checkered stones with warmth and energy. The gentle haze of daybreak had always been Princess Celestia's favorite time. Not just because she was in charge of raising the sun. To her, the dawn was a peaceful and quiet promise of things to come—activities of the exciting day still lay ahead of all the ponies in the land. Today would be a beautiful sunrise.
Celestia turned to the sun and focused her magic. She watched the progression of the golden orb climbing higher into the sky, turning her attention back to the pattern projected onto the floor every so often with the focused care of an artist creating a grand masterpiece. Even though this picture was one that the princess had painted the same way each morning for hundreds of moons, she gave it the same care every single day. It was her honor and duty.
The pieces of stained glass set in the center of the main arched window depicted Equestria's newest princess—an exceptionally talented young scholar named Princess Twilight Sparkle. The new royal and her five best pony friends and dragon assistant, whose images were immortalized in the glass as well, had protected Equestria from peril on more than one occasion. They now nobly sought to spread the true spirit of the Elements of Harmony and, in turn, the Magic of Friendship across its lands. Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Spike had come a long way since they'd all become friends. Celestia beamed with pride whenever the young heroes graced her thoughts or when their image in the window caught her attention.
A prominent piece of purple glass in the window cast a glow in the shape of a star on the center tile of the floor, signaling that the morning process was almost complete. Celestia closed her almond-shaped eyes, and her dark lashes pressed down in start contrast against her white cheekbones. She mustered every inch of strength in her body. She felt herself glistening with magical energy, from the bottom of her gilded hooves to the edges of her flowing mane of lavender, pale green, and periwinkle blue and bursting out to the very tip of her long, pearled horn. When Clestia opened her eyes again, the sun had reached the highest peak of its arc in the sky. The world was bright.
"Gratias ad solis ortum," the princess recited as she bowed deeply to the sun. "Thank you for allowing me to guide you, and thank you for another day of light."
"Beautifully done, sister."
Everyone's heard of "Lavender Unicorn Syndrome" - you don't have to describe what Twilight looks like over and over just to avoid repeating her name. We know what she looks like! Just say her name! There's a time and place for descriptions, and LUS is an example of when it becomes very distracting. Especially if it's during an action scene, or a pivotal moment, and things need to move quickly.
Taken to an extreme, I've fallen into this temptation.... why describe Twilight's appearance at all, if my target audience is a fandom that already knows the show by heart? Maybe it's just the "traditional" thing to do, though it feels like a waste. Obviously, you'll need to describe characters for when you write original fiction. and I can see how the non-brony readers of this Celestia book might need that recap (parents reading to their kids, etc).
the infamous "show don't tell" rule makes this too confusing for me. Description is «showing», right? But isn't using Twilight's name «telling»? When do I describe, and when do I not? Why pause the story to give a wikipedia-style info dump?
Why did G.M. Berrow spend 4 precious pages with no dialogue, just to describe a character? Why did I enjoy reading it anyway, when it told me nothing new?
.......
I looked again. And it hit me.
It wasn't a paused description. It was an action.
Everything there was linked to the slowly stretched action of Celestia raising the sun. It may be very slow, but not stopped. The moving sunlight and magical energy directs our attention over all these details, and Celestia can ruminate on her memories and duties. Instead of a frozen obligatory recap, it becomes a reinforcement of her character and values, an effect that will linger through the rest of the book.
When time seems to stand still, even the tiniest change feels huge and important (e.g. "So quiet you could hear a pin drop"). A slow action is a good time to zoom in on the little details. If it's a fast-paced action scene, we need to keep track of what is moving and changing.
Show don't tell? Show and tell? Tell by showing?
show and tell through action. follow the example of Buster Keaton, who couldn't use sound, but didn't want to tell a story through title cards that interrupted the magic of moving pictures.
That's right. We eliminated subtitles just as fast as we could if we could possibly tell it in action.
You don't have to interrupt the story to describe, if you do it as part of an action. If something is moving or changing, even if it's subtle, the audience will pay attention. That's what living beings do, we notice change.
Here's the part where you stop looking at your thesaurus for synonyms of "purple", and become a real artist. There's endless possibilities for describing through action, but you have to create the right ones suited for your story.
am I the last person on FimFic to figure this out? they probably teach this on day 1 in every creative writing class.
oh well. it took a children's book for this to finally click together for me. yet it was cheaper than taking a class. 
BONUS:
"Everypony knows Alicorns are the most powerful ponies, like ever. Ever. They're super-duper rare, and you can only become one if you perform some amazing magical feat. There haven't been many except Mi Amore Cadenza, Twilight Sparkle, and—"
.... and who? who?! 
PREVIOUS ENTRIES:
Book 9 / Princess Luna and The Festival of the Winter Moon
So I should buy it? I hear (from Present Perfect) that the discord one is pretty good too.
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It's a really fun slice-of-life. Though the Princess Collection's ~royal~ hardcover means it costs $10 instead of $6.
the Discord book is great too, and I could've written a similar post comparing it to how the show does Discord episodes. but I went with this book instead because Celestia episodes are nonexistent.
A while back, I read the first two of Berrow's books and dismissed her as a hack. It's good to see she's gotten a lot better. Maybe I'll give her another chance.
Very nicely done, and enjoyable as always n_n
Yeah, but how does it compare to Interstellar?
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"more pony, less inadequate"
Finally finished it! Overall, I enjoyed it ^.^
It's a bit tough to judge, because I have to keep in mind it's geared towards a much younger audience. So I'll try to comment only on elements I think can stand independent of that. I had fun reading this, but I have one central complaint about it, surrounding--no surprise--Celestia.
I absolutely agree, it does fit well with Celestia's character. Although that character is ill-defined in some ways, I think Berrow establishes a basis for her personality that everyone can agree on.
But I feel she falls into another still common trap when writing her: lack of any real personal struggle. One which reveals who she is as a person. Let me try to explain.
When it comes to Luna, nearly everything is a personal struggle. Even if the problem is technically between other ponies, it's easy to give Luna some sort of personal and emotional investment in the issue, because of how her character is constructed.
But because of how Celestia is constructed, writers don't know how to give her flaws without feeling they are violating her character. They think giving her a struggle (internal or external) she is personally invested in and wrestles with also violates her character. Therein, I think, lies her difficulty. So for example, a writer may feel she couldn't have a mean streak or a short temper, and neither could she become frustrated and stressed that her teaching methods aren't working like she expected them to, because she's supposed to be too wise for that to occur, or has too strong a positive attitude, so that failure never bothers her. In time she overcomes it. In short, writers fall into a trap where nothing can ever really bother Celestia. And no obstacle affects her too personally/emotionally, or really challenges her worldview.
As a result, depictions of Celestia almost always either 1) keep her "show accurate" but make her boring and non-compelling, as she glides through troubles seemingly without concern, or 2) drop the show accuracy, the strong moral virtue and sense of wisdom, resulting in a more flawed, compelling characterization that is, we should admit, Celestia's in name only.
So really, I think the trouble lies in our misconception that Celestia's character traits and general personality prohibit flaws, personal struggles and challenges to her worldview, opinions, or way of doing things. But even Captain America, Superman, and Jesus have struggles. All three are compelling to watch.
The book comes close to avoiding these pitfalls: we learn she is worried about her sister ruling alone, and she has an old friend who needs help. These are great potential sources of tension and in line with Celestia's character. She would be worried about her sister, and would want to help a friend and not fail them. Neither issue denies her strong morally guided personality. But both are solved quickly and easily, with little trouble to Celestia. Twilight appears to help Luna, and Celestia quickly learns what is causing the students to fail.
Now cleverly, two complications are presented, both at the same time (which was great), and then...one is immediately solved. We see that Diamond misunderstands Celestia's teaching methods and feels betrayed. Before Celestia can react, she learns Canterlot was attacked, confirming her fears about Luna.
I feel this was the most honest, tension filled scene in the book. For a brief moment, there was a real, personal struggle for Celestia. Would she keep her calm? Would her faith in Luna prove flimsy, as Celestia flies off to Canterlot, abandoning Diamond? Or would her shaky conviction in Luna, upon being challenged, finally grow steadfast as she takes a leap of faith and remains in Monacolt? Her actions here speak about her inner character--her real character, the one which reveals itself under stress. Every possibility here is interesting and compelling, rife with character insight and growth.
But immediately we receive a letter from Twilight saying everything is okay, and the tension just...dissolves. Celestia is able to remain unchallenged, untested, her true character unrevealed, and she gets to remain unbothered.
Yes, there is still at this point the issue of Diamond's hurt feelings, but because it's a misunderstanding on Diamond's part that springs from her own flaws and Celestia did nothing wrong, there's no drama and the outcome is predictable and kinda boring. The hourglass was interesting, but again, Luna sweeps in and solves the issue for Celestia. Eventually, Diamond comes around and Celestia is proved right (to Diamond, not to us, and that makes a difference. We already knew she was in the right).
In the end, Celestia goes home without me knowing anything deeper about her than I did at the start. I guess if I had to sum the story up in one word, I'd choose: non-compelling. Fun and enjoyable, but not compelling--at least, certainly not beyond a surface level. And that's something that I believe Berrow could have accomplished within the limits of her audience.
Thoughts?
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great analysis!
hrmm, that is true. I wonder if maybe something was lost during editing. Just holding that tension for a scene or two could've gone a long way, even if it's resolved with the letter anyway. It would've suggested Celestia did make a decision to stay.
now that you point it out, it almost seems like a Goosebumps moment with how quickly it passes. "Gasp a monster is opening the door! Oh, it's just grandma with cookies, whew!"
You mentioned Superman, which got me thinking again about Grant Morrison's book All-Star Superman. He is pretty similar to Celestia, being a mentor/protector to humanity (in a slightly utopian world), but with this popular stereotype that he never has any problems. Morrison's comic dives into the interesting conflicts and uses them to develop Superman in surprising ways, and it's funny how well it lines up in my mind if I mentally replace him with Princess Celestia. Though it's different that we know a lot more about Superman's friends and history, but the book still succeeds even if you're mostly unfamiliar with the character. So I think even a fanfic (or official episode) that has to invent this kind of backstory for Celestia could still work for all the same reasons, without having to go too far turning her "mortal"/flawed.
I'll keep a lot of this in mind. maybe I'll write a Celestia fic, or maybe not. perhaps for the next minific Writeoff, so I can experiment and see if I understand her any better now.
Glad you still enjoyed the book, so my review wasn't misleading even with all the flaws I didn't notice.
I'm actually using these reviews more to work out how to interpret the characters, than to critique Berrow's writing. (in the next one, which I've almost finished writing, I spend even MORE words picking apart the character than I did here for Celestia)
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Sorry for the delay!
Oh gosh, you're fine, trust me! Your review wasn't misleading at all. I'm really glad you wrote it, because I never would have read the book otherwise, and I am glad I read the book.
Do iiiiiiiiiiiiit :D
And when you do, I want to be the first to read it! ^.^ (I meant that)
Yeah exactly. It would have been a great opportunity to see Celestia wrestle with herself, with opposing impulses that are rooted deep in her character: concern over Luna, and not wanting to fail a teaching position or her friend.
I totally agree. Here's an old video by Tommy Oliver/Bronycurious about Mary Sues. In it, he explains why Superman matches the common definition of Mary Sues, but isn't one, because even though he isn't flawed, he's still challenged. (I'm sure you could give Superman flaws. I've never read any of the comics, so I don't know what people have done. Any you would recommend--maybe Morrison's?)
Captain America The Winter Soldier did the same thing with Cap. He isn't really flawed, but the movie knows how to make him interesting: test his worldview (in this case, ideas about freedom and security), and tempt him to abandon or betray his convictions, by turning the tide against him, both in terms of physical opposition and the opinions of his friends. We want to see if he'll be proved right or wrong, and if he'll stand on his morals even when it turns his friends against him. And of course, he does.
It's hard for him, it is a struggle, and he doesn't want it to happen that way (and that's important, because the fact it bothers him keeps him still reachably human, which is what Superman is too), but he doesn't take the easy path. As a result, we learn the strength of Cap's convictions and what kind of person he is. He's compelling, because he struggles like all of us. We're challenged in our beliefs everyday. I think "my coworker is insecure and I should stand up for her," but shortly thereafter I'm in a position where it's hard to do that, and very easy not too. What do I do? Most of us fail in many of our day to day convictions. It's compelling when we watch a character on the verge of the same thing. A character doesn't have to have personal flaws in the same manner as Luna in order to fail their convictions, or come close to failing.
And that right there is, I think, one way to handle Celestia. Make her as virtuous and wise as you want. But make it really hard for her to be so, and she will be compelling. She can succeed in the end and be proven strong, or fail and proven ultimately weak.
For example, trusting Luna with handling the invasion of Canterlot while she stays in Monacolt. She knows trusting her is the right thing to do, but now it's hard. You can turn this mistrust into a flaw that can be dealt with (despite forgiving her for Nightmare Moon we realize she doesn't actually trust her, and Celestia struggles with this). Or, going another route, keep it as a good impulse: the right and good thing to do is help her sister. But the good thing is also to not abandon Diamond Waves. Now, it seems impossible to be as good as she wants--life makes it that way. Celestia can either be beaten into submission by life, or she can prevail and prove life wrong. Celestia uses her intelligence, experience, skill and wisdom to help both Luna and Diamond, and because she does what we thought was impossible, we admire her. Just like how we admire Cap or Superman. There's a lot at stake for her, in terms of her beliefs, how she sees herself, and how others will see her.
Though I do believe that Celestia is ripe for giving her flaws. Just not the kind Luna has. She's probably as set in her ways and beliefs as a petrified tree. I imagine her being very passive aggressive, and vindictive (thanks to her experience, she knows how to make you feel sorry for upsetting her, and she will make you sorry, in such a way she looks as innocent as a child the whole time). Petty too, in some ways. She's essentially been an only child for a millennium; she isn't used to not getting her way, particularly, I'm sure, in her relationships. I'm sure she's more uptight than relaxed, despite appearing otherwise, takes on more burden than is healthy, and has a martyr complex, where she's isn't being a good pony unless she's sacrificing something she wants.
But aside from all that, what I think drives Celestia is a desire to be good, or be seen as good--the most good. Only, you know, it's so hard to be good, and she probably fails all the time, because she's only a pony after all.
Or she doesn't fail. Depends on how you want to write it. As we've seen both can be compelling.
...I talk too much