• Member Since 10th Jul, 2011
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Shrinky Frod

Exploring the depths of the equine psyche! Now with ko-fi link and Patreon!

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  • 47 weeks
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  • 72 weeks
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    So... I'm gonna try this again. It hasn't worked out so well in the past, but I'm *hopeful* that with the right prompts and stuff, I might be able to make this work! Also, trying to get a part-time position, but that takes time and all.

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  • 74 weeks
    What the heck....

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    2 comments · 119 views

I'll ship it! · 12:46pm Apr 3rd, 2016

shipping RD + Cadance...
Kill me.

I've often seen comments such as "these characters could never get together," or "the only way to ship this character is to get rid of this one!"

Bull. Shit.

Part of the magic of fanfiction is that our entire art is based on the magic of the unknown. Filling in the blanks between episodes, or between scenes. Asking "really, Kirk's so fast to jump into bed with women, why not men too?"

I've been writing fanfiction longer than some fans of this show have been alive (and not just the target audience!) If there's one thing I've learned, it's that a good enough author can make any concept work - especially if it's a ship!

And so, in the interests of proving this point, I issue a challenge. I intend to be online most of today, working on a commission (Hi DBZ! I haven't forgotten you!) But of course I'm going to need the occasional break.

So, for April 3rd, throw any pairing you want at me. Be as bizarre as you want. I'll come up with a set of circumstances to justify shipping those characters. And moreover, I will do so WITHOUT:

Breaking up established pairings.
Using a rape to justify any stage of the pairing (Christ, that trope bugs me - rape is not how you start a healthy relationship!)
Contradicting in-show canon.

I may contradict popular fanon - for example, maybe Octavia isn't a snob about her music and actually appreciates her roommate's more modern beats! I may *add* to in-show canon - maybe Spitfire is trans, and identifies as a stallion, but hasn't come out about it. I may add to a pairing - Cadance and Shining Armor might well be open to a non-monogamous relationship! The characters may go through Hell - sometimes, adversity can bring two ponies together who wouldn't normally get that chance.

To demonstrate, I give two examples. The first, dead simple - RD and Cadance OR Shining Armor, as referenced above.

Rainbow Dash is the Element of Loyalty. It makes a measure of sense that she would be attracted to both Cadance and Shining Armor, because they have a strong emotional bond that has been put through the fire and demonstrably not only survived, but thrived. It has survived parenthood. It has survived the stresses of being royalty. It has *enabled* saving two different kingdoms, one of those after suffering magically induced infidelity for a prolonged period of time!

Their bond is rock solid, and that may very well attract a pony who puts such a high value on loyalty. This might actually upset Rainbow, who may think at first that she's a threat to the very loyalty that initially attracted her to either of them.

And why wouldn't she be attracted beyond that? She's a very physical, athletic mare, very spunky and prone to kick frou-frou things in the muzzle if they start trying to keep her down. Shining Armor was the Captain of the Equestrian Guard, very physical, very handsome - he's obviously a potential interest. Candance is equally happy to throw down social conventions and say buck it, she wants to have some fun - but is willing to go through the niceties when it's necessary for the good of her people. Dash could probably get behind that too (and enjoy the view while she's there!) Best of all? Since they already have a kid, RD wouldn't have to worry about being pressured to be a Mom before she was ready to be one - she can be the awesome semi-aunt, get used to kids, and not having to go through being pregnant herself before she decides she wants to swap her career for motherhood.

As for why Cadance and/or Shining would be attracted to RD - her loyalty, her looks, any of these things could be of interest. To Cadance, she may very well seem to be a female pegasus version of her husband, particularly when she finds out about RD's fangirl geeking out over Daring Do. Shining may very well be attracted to a mare who can keep up with him and keep him on his toes physically. Cadance might like having another born pegasus around too, one who really knows her way around a pair of wings, if y'know what I mean, and Shiny may very well have a wing fetish of his own for all we know.

So the triad, whichever member of it (or, Hell, both of them!) that RD is initially interested in, certainly has the potential to be stable, with enough dramatic potential for just the relationship to be the driving force of a good story!

Like I said. That was easy. Let's try something REALLY out there now!

Snipsbra - that's right, Sombra and Snips.

Sombra is pretty obviously a very vain pony. So it would make sense that the would-be God Emperor of the Crystal Empire would have a dedicated barber to tend his mane. An adult Snips may even seem a particularly good choice as a pudgy, unambitious example of pony who would be unlikely to attempt to use his position to try and assassinate Sombra. Indeed, as has been pointed out more than once, the man a king or general must trust above all others is his barber, for only the barber has a position which requires him to wield a razor against the king's head and throat - and without the king fearing he must flinch away at any sudden movement, at that!

So that's how we bring the two of them in contact. As for how a relationship forms from that, as pointed out, it's a position of confidence. As Sombra's confidence grows stronger, he may find himself trusting his barber with other parts of his life. Discussing military maneuvers, trade deals, things like that. Indeed, he may even find his barber occasionally provides some salient advice. Not the most skillful or competent, but an outside perspective that Sombra wouldn't have necessarily thought of after a thousand years or more trapped in another dimension.

As for Snips, the realization that he has the King's ear might make him realize that he has the potential to try and soften some of the King's worst aspects. He can appeal to Sombra's (incredibly weak) better nature, play to his vanity to try and bring out a slightly less tyrannical edge, hopefully save some lives in the process. As he comes to realize that Sombra has a softer side, and that Sombra trusts him enough to let it out, he may come to realize that there's something worth loving inside the tyrant. As for the tyrant, the very novelty of having somepony he can trust - and, eventually, who seems to sincerely believe that he's not a complete monster - may be enough to entertain the prospect of a secretive relationship. And, again, the very process of getting them to the point where that relationship could happen is enough to be the basis of a compelling story, if well written.

So - there you have it. Examples that I've been told are impossible, and an example that even I had never thought of before. But can you one-up Snipsbra? Can you stump my ability to figure out a story that could give a ship a chance?


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Comments ( 17 )

Granny Smith and Pipsqueak?

Starswirl x Twilight - Starswirl existed thousand of years ago in canon, ha!

And time travel without known limitations exists in canon now. Twilight uses Starlight's spell to go back, gives it to Starswirl so he can come forward to find out who this mysterious new princess is. That's what happened to Starswirl - he didn't die, he disappeared from time, coming forward to find Twilight, fall in love with her, and help guide her into a prolonged golden age for Equestria.

By the way - I'm not going to consider the "EU" elements as full-on canon, such as the Book of Friendship or the Tome of the Two Sisters, or the comics as I have not read all of them and neither have many other fans. Hence my statement of in-show canon not being contradicted.

Windigo x Pound Cake!

As for the Windigoes, I'm arguing that they're a species, not a group. Now, you said Pound (I went back and looked). Like you said - we don't really have much of a canon personality for Pound, except that he seems to have (as an infant) possible anger issues - he gets frustrated, he smacks things. Okay, so there we go - Pound Cake has anger and impulse control issues. At some point, as a teen, he blows up and runs away from home, heading into the Frozen North. While there, a Windigo comes looking for him, drawn by his simmering anger. Good so far?

From there, as the windigo tries to turn him to the proverbial dark side, it also follows him back into civilization. The story could either follow Pound embracing that darkness and the simmering anger, coming closer and closer to the demonic force whispering in his ear and the two falling into a twisted relationship, or possibly into redemption for the windigo itself, if it's some manner of hatred-driven spirit that can actually be redeemed by being tricked into an environment where it isn't forced to subsist in a simmering hatred for all that lives and breathes.


Not technically a pairing, but this one's a challenge in that it's the only character where we have a reason to believe we have effectively seen its entire existence on-screen, in that it exists only to torment Luna until it breaks out, at which point it seeks to spread Luna's nightmares and then is absorbed back into Luna at the end of the episode.

However, I would pose that while it gained power from Luna's self-loathing, there is no evidence to indicate that it requires it in order to survive - the Tantabus may very well still exist as a dream construct, and now one that exists primarily to help Luna in the dream realm. From there, pairing with anypony is simply a matter of finding them in their dreams and becoming attached - the story is in Luna fearing that her construct has gone awry again when it doesn't come back some morning, and hunting down her creation for fear that it's gone mad when really it's just in love and wants to live, rather than exist purely for Luna's purposes.


Granny Smith is old, but she's had her adventures. Pipsqueak is young, but full of life and ambition and the desire for adventure. Pip starts hanging out with her more as he grows up, learning about Equestria's history, earth pony magic, and possibly dating Apple Bloom - but beginning to fall in a deeply romantic, platonic love for the elderly mare who reminds him of everything he wants to be one day, while she becomes similarly attached to him for reminding her of her youth and bringing it back out in her. Bonus plot threads: The difficulty of his relationship with Apple Bloom starting to fracture because he's in love with her GRANDMOTHER, even though he may not be physically attracted to the elderly mare, and the eventual tragedy of Granny's death while he's still young, unless we assume that prolonged consumption of fruit from the Everfree has somehow rendered her immortal, but still aging (explaining how she was around when Ponyville was founded, and is still on this side of the ground.)

Comment posted by Flyerton deleted Apr 3rd, 2016

(For those wondering, Flyerton was reposting his Tantabus challenge while I was in the process of writing my post. So I didn't go and delete one I couldn't handle, he did that himself. :pinkiegasp: )

Hmm, how about Celestia and that Jam stallion?

I'm here to confirm this statement!

(Also I'd appreciate if you spelt my name right >:V)

I don't know what you're talking about! :trixieshiftleft::trixieshiftright::trixieshiftleft:

Psht, easy!


Two great tastes that go great together - and he can enjoy making sure her coat's nice and clean before she has to be in court! :raritywink:

Brah, I live off pairings nobody else wants to try. I got this:

Tirek and Celestia.

Ah, this one just needs me to brush the dust off of a Sombralestia approach!

Since the easy approach is to set this before his initial attempt to conquer Equestria, shall I go for modern, or go with the old-time approach?

Eh, what the Hell, I'll go for both.

Ancient Times:
The whole reason Tirek and Skorpan came to Equestria was part of a diplomatic envoy sent to try and arrange a marriage between the Sun Princess and the two Princes of their realm, with the idea being that Celestia would hopefully fall for one of the two suitors, marry, and then there would be a powerful alliance. Tirek and Celestia began to fall for each other - but when his father passed away unexpectedly, the old man left the throne to Skorpan. Seeing the kingdom about to slip through his fingers, Tirek forged his plan to steal the magic of Equestria and rule over both realms, as well as the rest of the world. Skorpan realized what he was doing, warned Celestia before her magic could be stolen, and with a heavy heart, Celestia and Luna were forced to banish Tirek to Tartarus. Skorpan returned to his home to rule alone the kingdom he would have happily shared with his brother.

Modern Times:
Nightmare Moon has been redeemed. Discord has been redeemed. Sombra... not so much, but surely there remains some fondness for her in Tirek's heart? If she kept a close enough eye on him, maybe she could let him out, and try to rekindle what they once had?

After all... deep inside, she still loves the being he used to be. Surely, if she came to him willingly, he could find that he still loves her, somewhere? It would be worth it, to be together, after being alone for so very long.

(This, of course, assumes that he wasn't destroyed by the power of the Elements, but instead merely banished back to Tartarus again.)

Does Flash sentry x sombra count?
When yes then do so.

Try boulder and Celestia

Why wouldn't it?

When Sombra retakes the Crystal Empire, Flash Sentry is captured. While held as prisoner, Sombra sets out to break the young guard as an example of what he will do to the rest of Equestria when he conquers it. But when Flash refuses to break, Sombra begins to develop a grudging admiration for the steadfast pegasus. Deciding to change tactics, he decides that he'll "pretend" to seduce Flash instead, attempting to turn him to the Empire's side along with any intelligence he may offer and as a propaganda tool (at least, that's the theory on paper.) But when Flash seems to be open to these advances, even making some of his own, is he actually interested in the King, or is he playing the same game by a different set of rules?

Celestia's life is a stressful one, to say the least. But at the Gala with Discord and company, she notices a handsome being off by the buffet table. Curious, she goes over to meet him, only to be struck by his zen-like calm in the midst of the unadulterated chaos that Discord nearly unleashes between the Smooze and his little temper tantrum over Fluttershy's interest in the stoner mare (really, it would be *so* much more boring if she hadn't arranged for that letter to arrive at the last possible minute!)

Unfortunately, during the chaos, she is separated from the intriguing creature - only to see him riding off with one of the other guests when it is over!

Now, Celestia will do whatever it takes to find that beacon of calm in the storm. And neither Maud Pie, nor a jealous Philomena, will stop her!

3846114 okay New one.
Queen sombra x King sombra.

Mirror pool malfunction + narcissism = "technically this character didn't even exist to be able to ship, but I'm sleep addled and it doesn't take me long." :ajsmug:

I... I may have been beaten.

I have been presented with the challenge to do a Mr or Mrs Cake/Fleetfoot story.

By March 21.

Fortunately, I've developed two options....

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