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What happens when Deadpool, the Merc with the Mouth, lands in the magical land of Equestria? Same thing that happens in every cross story, but with more Deadpool!!!
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MrAquino · 297k words · 845 93 · 17k views

Deadpool Reviews: The MLP season 5 Premiere. (The Cuite Map 2 parter) · 1:51pm Apr 5th, 2015

HELLO EVERYONE! Wade Wilson, or better know as Deadpool, here, with my very own special series of blogs, as I use this loser's account to post my reviews of the new episodes of MLP Season 5!
He gave us permission.
And we're on a clock before his dad wakes up.
Oh! Sorry! Let's begin with the review, shall we? Oh, and if you haven't seen the premiere yet, here!

Basically, it goes like this: the mane 6 discover 3 things. 1) their butts glow when sitting on their thrones. 2) A map will lead them to places as a means to help ponies out with their friendship problems. And 3) COMMMUNISM IS EVIL!!! Yeah! Communism folks! Let's get to the third one later, but the mane 6 follow the map to a small town, leaving behind Spike because... Big Mac and Spike are football fans? Alright, I know it's called Hoofball, but seriously, I never really saw Big Mac as a sports type guy! Though, I was surtprised at how well he could sing. Please, don't ask, MrAquino will do it. So... yeah, they left Spike behind because... well...

That sums it up.
At least for Spike. How is MrAquino going to use him for the new Dragonfire story he's making, a different retelling of Mass Effecrt 1 & 2!?
I have no idea. Please, help the loser out, but anyways, back to the review! They head there by train where... the tracks aren't finished and the trains backs it's way back to Canterlot. Huh... strange. Can trains do that?
...If the caboose is another front.
Highly doubtful then
Ah f**k it! Roll the clip!

They make it the village on the map, and, surprisingly, Pinkie is the one who can tell right through their deceptive smiles. Ha! My type of lady! They're greeted by the townsfolk, who all have the same cutie mark and all greet with the repetition of 'Welcome!' Then, they're welcomed by the leader, Starlight Glimmer, who also wishes them welcome.

Seriosuly? Starlight Glimmer!?
Yeah! We already have a Sunset Shimmer, now this!?

So the towns folks with obvious Twilight knockoff begin to sing a song and, admit it folks, this came in mind:

So they learn that there's something evil going on here, as a group of these same ponies want their old cutie marks back, as it turns out, Starfire uses a staff to get rid of cutie marks. Why? COMMUNISM!!! They learn all Cutie Marks are stored in a vault and... let's get that joke out of the way.

So now they're cutie buttless. They're thrown in jail, where mass propaganda is in their room about how communism is much better than being different. Twilight sends Fluttershy to join them, since she fell in love with the town quicker then the others, and gains their trust in the morning. It isn't until Fluttershy find out that, Sunstroke was, wait for it... FAKING HER OWN CUTIE MARK!!!

So yeah... Fluttershy helps her friends and they show that Pony Stalin isn't equal, and the staff was actually a stick in the desert, which means her talent is... taking other talents away. Huh?
How did she discover that?
Family issues?
Oh well. We know what happens next.

So Not Sunset Shimmer runs off carrying the Mane 6's cutie marks, and the ponies who wanted their butt marks back help the mane 6 out. They get their marks back, and Starlight escapes.

So the town celebrates, rebuilding it to accept everyone as they are and not taking Cutie marks away. So how is it? Well, at least the Season is now here, and that means more adventures for our heroines... and me! Of course, I would say this: If Spike were there, he may have been usefull. Not affected by their cutie mark magic, he could've been like Gaz in that scene from Invader Zim, you know, when Dib was in the tank and Zim mocked how Gaz could never break the bowl. I couldn't find the clip, but if you know that scene,

But... he's not, since he's
Underused?
USELESS!!!
Eh, both. So now Season 5 is here, the Hiatus is over, and, if you excuse me, I've gotta be on the lookout for a specific b***h.
She'll most likely be back in the Season finale.
Or Equestria Girls 3!
Hm... True on both. But, the season Premiere is alright, and we'll be ready. This is Deadpool, saying this: SUPPORT THIS LOSER'S STORIES, OKAY!?!?!?