So, The Chance went vaguely Lovecraftian · 7:24pm Oct 23rd, 2014
“There’s been another attack… we just found him… the rats got another one in the night, that’s why he didn’t come down for the breakfast headcount!”
The older mare turned to glare at the younger mare, and the younger unicorn mare looked at Mignon, her face contorting with even more panic. She inhaled sharply and her eyes went wide with shock.
“Ooh,” the unicorn mare exhaled and then retreated through the door.
“Excuse me, just wait here sir,” the older mare requested, and then she too, went through the door.
Peering through the door, Mignon struggled to see what was beyond. He saw a white sheet stained crimson on the floor, and something lumpy lurked beneath it. As the door slowly swung shut, he saw the white sheet being lifted, and what he saw stole his breath away. What he saw was horrible. What he saw was indescribable. It was easily the worst thing he had ever seen, even worse than the time he had stumbled into the gutting room of the fish processing plant. What he saw was…
“SLAM!”
The door shut with a bang and he stood there numbly, suddenly unable to remember what was behind the door. What he had seen had troubled him, he knew that, but now, no matter how hard he tried, he could not recall what he saw. He had seen something… something unpleasant. Something that had unnerved him. His brain teased him with an image of white.
He swallowed and backed out of the office, stepped into the foyer, and then with a frightened cry, he fled the orphanage and the horror within, running screaming into the street, his cloak billowing out behind him.
Well, that went kinda dark for a rated Everybody story. Think this needs a dark tag? I've been debating this for a while, I'm terrible at making these sorts of decisions, I don't know what to do. Input is welcomed. And please, enjoy the story.
I think once can slide, but if you expect to have any more like that I'd say tag it dark.
Tag it as such if this is going to be a theme of the story. If it's just the one moment of eldritch revelation... Well, you do still have children getting eaten by rats. That's kind of dark. Again, it depends on where you're going with the story.
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He wont actually be able to remember what is behind the door, but it will haunt him.
I would consider the dark tag if there will be a continued focus on the orphanage.
I think that with that scene you're edging mighty close if you don't. but if you give much more detail about what's going on at that orphanage you're going to need at least a gore tag if not a dark tag.
What's the difference between everyone and teen? Could that tranisition help?