MTiffany Twisted
MLP: FiM
Dark
Sad
On a dark desert highway, a lone pony finds himself in a place that could be heaven, or it could be hell.
Gore
Rarity
OC
Nightmare Moon
Drax99 · 9.4k words · 270 views

A Taste of Things to Come · 3:52am Oct 21st, 2014

Well, the Halloween story is still a bust, and I'm giving up again. i just cant find the time and inspiration to write more of it. I am instead going to try finishing two chapters on other stories that are monster related. I am almost done the next chapter of Interesting Times, and I want to finish the final chapter of Patchwork Pony. Look for those before the end of the month.

I am also stated on the next R4R chapter, and will have that ready next month. So... who wants a sneak peek?

SPOILER ALERT!

Hangovers suck. I mean, sure, they also mean you kicked some serious ass in the arena of party-going, but they are still nature’s way of reminding us of our mortality after our brief brush with invincibility. Today was no exception as I wished once again for the ability to kill every bird within a mile radius with my mind. At the very least, let me make it rain or something so the baleful glare of the morning sun would stop tortureing me for my sins.
Yes, this truly was hell. Forced to endure the painful sounds and searing light of early morning as punishment for my night of hedonism. It didn't help at all that I had an incredibly soft and cuddly plushie to curl up against to comfort me. One that was all warm, and furry, and snoring softly.
“Whadafuq?” My eyes shot open, only to be filled with pink. Light and dark, an unending wall of pink assaulted my tortured orbs as I blinked them into usefulness. Dehydration and lack of use rendered this a battle as I tried to focus my abused eyes on what was before me. To my horror, the mass of pink resolved itself into the erratic form of my roommate’s hair and face as she slumbered peacefully in my arms.
“Oh god, what did I do?” I tried to think back on the previous night, only to have my mind scrabble to a halt on the edge of an abyss of missing memory. clearly remembered telling Pinkie about our amazing windfall, in the form of almost a half million dollars revenue. It seems that the casino had no right to withhold our winnings, seeing as there was no way to prove we had cheated. It also helped that all winnings were taxable, and the government wanted their cut, so were happy to help us. Even after taxes, it was an insane amount of money, so me and Pinkie decided to celebrate.
And celebrate we did... But that was where it began to get fuzzy. I remember being at a bar, and buying everyone a round, and then another, and then we danced. I think I may have sang something. Then nothing. My mind was a blank.
I rolled out of bed, nearly falling over as my abused brain decided to rebel, and enlisted my stomach in the cause. I quickly dashed for the bathroom and made it just in time for my last meal to make a break for the entrance. It was not going to be a nice day.
After a quick brush and rinse, I stumbled back into my room where my my pink companion was just regaining consciousness.
“Ugh, Louis, why does everything hurt so much? And my mane. My main feels like it was pulled out and glued back on.” Shaking her head, Pinkie winced in pain. “I feel like that time I let Twilight talk me into potion testing experiments. I didn't even know what a futanari potion was, but it tasted terrible, and hurt like heck.”
“A better question is why are you in my bed, and what the fuck happened last night?” I grumbled, handing a cup of water to my friend as I flopped on the edge of the mattress.
“Oh! I don’t remember, and my head hurts worse when I try to think about it.” Suddenly her eyes went wide, as they met my own surprised look, and we both had the same thought. “Did we...?”
I reached down and scratched my balls, then gave the resulting hand a sniff. I relaxed as I detected nothing but sweat, and the smell of New Spice body wash. “Nope, I don't think we did, Pinkie.” I was never more relieved to smell ball sweat in my life.
“Eew, gross. But I think you’re right. I’m pretty sure I would feel it if I had that thing in me.” Nervously, and a bit disappointed, the pink mare chuckled and slid off the bed. She made her way into the bathroom as I shrugged.
“Aww shucks, now yer makin me blush.” I joked.
“So what the hay did happen then?”
“Fuck if I know. We went out, got trashed, then woke up. That's all I got.” I sat back on the bed, then fell back with a sigh.
A moment later I heard a flush, and the brief sound of a sink running. Pinkie came out looking only slightly less disheveled, as she made her way over to me.
“So, if we got drunk, but didn't make out, how did we wake up together, and what the hay happened last night?” Leaning against me, she lay her head in my lap and sighed. Suddenly I felt her perk up as she lifted her head. “Hello? What’s this?”
Walking over to the nightstand, she picked up an envelope that was open. Shaking out the contents, she grabbed ahold of the paper within, as something metal rang against the nightstand. I immediately sat up and reached out for the paper in curiosity.
“The hell? Pinkie, this is a marriage license, and these look like wedding rings. But I can't read the crazy pony language it’s in. What the fuck did we do last night?” I nearly yelled, feeling my panic rise.
“What? Are we married? That's... well that’s not so bad, is it?” Sounding kinda hurt, she took the paper from my hand and looked it over. I was too shocked to argue. “Umm, Louis. Why are there three names on here?”
“What!?” I snatched the document from her hoof and looked it over. Sure enough there was room for more than two names, and three of them were filled. I then looked at the top of the form, and saw that it was on letterhead from the Equestrian embassy. “Is this shit even legal? Last I checked, Polygamy wasn't allowed in the US.”
“Well it is in Equestria. It’s very old, and not many follow the tradition anymore, but we used to call it “Herding”. A single male was allowed to marry as many mares as he could provide for. My great auntie Pie was in a herd with three mares, until they found out the stallion was cheating on all of them and divorced him. Wait, who else did we marry, anyway?”
“Ugh, will you guys please shut the buck up? I’m trying to sleep over here!” Both of us turned in shock as the pile of blankets at the foot of the bed spoke up. Carefully I leaned over, and peeled back the top layer to revealed a splash of rainbow underneath.
“Rainbow Dash? What the hay are you doing here?” Pinkie squeaked in surprise.
“Oh, hiya Pinkie Pie. I’m trying to sleep, of course. So if you two could keep it down a bit...?” With a roll of her eyes, she grabbed the blanket and collapsed back into unconsciousness.
Raising my eyes to the ceiling, it took all my strength not to facepalm. “Oh fuck me!”