Nov
5th
2013
<Personal> There's a Special Kind of Dead · 11:48pm Nov 5th, 2013
There's a special kind of dead
Yes that's right, death.
A special kind of dead
For when you feel empty inside.
Cold..
Alone...
Empty.
A special kind of death exists in this world,
for those not wicked nor pure.
No it exists for those who seek to love
and for those who toss that love aside.
I'm that kind of dead inside.
Yes that's right, death.
A special kind of dead
...
...
...
For I am empty inside.
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ChaoticHarmony · 347 views
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*hugs tightly*
I like this very much. It was very well written. Your choice in words was superb, as was your decision to make some words be their own line.
Now, what's up man? Is there something wrong?
I think I know what chaotic harmony is referring to. In learning through primary experiences, I believe I've come to a few conclusions, one of which applies to this 'death of emptiness' that he seems to be referring to.
Socialization and Isolation. Neither inherently good or bad, you need some of each, but too much of either leads to undesirable results. As many of us may have noticed, mechanisms of communication, such as facebook, have led to this 'hyper-socialization' that plagues the younger generations. It's effect can be noted quite easily. It shallows out the mind.
Now, many us know that you do not learn best when surrounded by others, but rather, when you're left in solitude. Isolation provides the environment one requires to reflect, and think deeply about matters. However, I've come to discover, I believe the process of learning is... dis-associative. As your focus on knowledge and truth intensifies, and you begin to attain the answers/question-inducing-lack-of-answers, and begin to develop a vision for the relativity of all things, this phenomena occurs. You do not just shallow out, you empty out.
The point is: Hyper-socialization leads to beings that are so very identified with themselves (they see themselves, and their reflection through others), that they become locked into certain ways of thinking, and will reject anything that does not align with their sense of self. (new ideas; knowledge) While Isolation creates the perfect environment for increasing ones' knowledge, while the process of learning is dis-associative, leaving one with little opportunity to remember/re-enforce their sense of self.
So, the ideal environment is not one of perpetual socialization, nor is it of isolation, but rather, a balance between the two.
So, Chaotic Harmony, I now will ask you: Are you remembering to get out, and have fun with friends? If you believe the propositions relayed in this comment are without application to your life, and that may be the case, that is fine, these are just some traits i've noticed when I isolated myself, when I rebounded and started over-socializing, and at present, as I struggle to find the perfect balance between the two. (I can literally feel the mind-numbing as I participate in 5-hour skype calls in which we babble about meaningless bullshit the entire time, while I also can feel the 'emptying' of taking two day long breaks, in which I think, and work, but talk to no one, and start to feel my sense of self fading away to the never-ending quest of the human mind to draw connections, to make meaning of everything big and small, in ways of varying significance, of which is to be recognized as the relativity of all things)
1485740 There are no words to describe how much I wish to delete this comment at the moment...
I'm not holding a competition here, I'm expressing a torrent of sadness that's washing through my body right now.
1485865 You're not quite where I'm going at with the poem.
Though that was a pleasant analysis of it, just not quite what I meant.
1485873
Are you portraying a broken heart, of a sort? Are you without a girlfriend/boyfriend, and lonely because of it?
I still argue that love is just a different form of socialization, but still socialization at its core. Love being the recognition of appreciation by one entity of consciousness for another entity of consciousness. Love, if reciprocated, being the thing which brings two entities together, so they may be in near-perpetual isolation, as they experience things together, reflect/think on matters together, and seek to influence, and be-influenced by, the other entity.
If not loneliness via isolation, or a broken heart, then I'm going to need some help concluding what you're trying to portray. Forgive me, it's been a while since I've attempted to think deeply on a matter.
*hugs*
I think it is good that you - occasionally - feel that way, for it is the best proof that you are still alive, caring. I see it as a mayor fragment of one's personality how he or she deals with that emptiness. It is a landscape to where we can return, or can be forced to return to, whenever it is necessary. We don't enter it on free will as there is no need for it. That is, until we are not able anymore to find all the pieces in the social environment that we need for a warm life. Then, when we enter, the entirely different nature of this mind-setting, or be it our cellar-vault, because there is nothing we can grasp. There are no open doors that tell us to stay.
We are surely used to embed us into a social fabric, and all of a sudden we are able to expand our soul. It is even the only possible thing to do in this emptiness. In this expansion we don't have to search for hooks of others where we can link together. That is probably where the coldness comes from: we can't feel our own warmth. At least we can not here. But down there we can learn to. Imagine the possibilities! You can, in this emptiness, build your own fort of warmth and independent safety. All it needs you to do is to expand, to travel further down, to get familiar with this new environment. Whether you then still want to leave and to go back to the old setting in its entirety again, that is a question not worth the time.
I like the poem.
1485873 I'm deleting the comment. You are an author, so I thought this was a poem just because. I write poems like that all the time, but not because I'm sad. Now, I feel very mean and I feel bad for you. Here, have this heart icon.
I'm very sorry.
...
*hugs Chaotic*
We are here for you, buddy.