Present Perfect vs. Mendacity · 2:48am Jul 22nd, 2013
Spoilers: there is no city-mending in this story. :( There is a reading though, by Savrin Drake.
Mendacity by Dromicosuchus was, as I recall, really popular when it was updating, which wasn't all that long ago. It's based around a fairly simple idea -- what if Bon-Bon had always been a changeling? -- and explores another side to the show based around the events of A Canterlot Wedding.
That's where the simplicity ends. Dromicosuchus does what a lot of lesser authors have tried and failed to do, namely painting an Equestria where there lives a hidden Faerie world, unknown even to the Princesses, at least in part. Starting with the more fanciful definition of the term "changeling" (often synonymous with "faerie"), he slowly layers in creature after creature, building the world up like some kind of... layery... cake? I'm tired, I probably shouldn't be writing this now.
In this world, we get to meet a wonderful character, a kelpie by the name of Aldrovanda (I had to look it up), whose snarkiness is a wonderful foil for Bon-Bon's single-minded determination. She's a real thorn in Bon's side throughout the whole thing, and she goes through some very surprising changes as the story progresses. What also struck me about her is the way she thinks. Being Fae, her logical powers are rather askew from what we mere mortals are accustomed to, and there were numerous times when I just had to sit back and marvel at her lack of grasp on reality. For that's what happens to Fae: they fade away into the madness of the Faerie domain and lose touch with our reality, which plays by slightly different rules. It reminded me of nothing so much as how fairies are portrayed in the Dresden Files, so kudos to Dromi for that.
Of course, as much as Aldrovanda chews the scenery, Bon-Bon is a good character on her own right, and well she should be. The description of the story even points out that she tends to take a back seat, playing straightmare in fanon to Lyra's ridiculous antics, be they human-based, hand-related, or just plain being excitable. In this, we get to watch her tireless determination to save Lyra, even in the face of Aldrovanda's meddling, not to mention a lot of soul-searching of the sort I've come to expect from changeling fics. Which isn't to say it's good.
Here, I should mention one thing that might turn some off: this is full of fanon references. Lyra is obsessed with hands, though thankfully not humans (which is not to say I dislike that meme, only that it doesn't belong in serious works for the most part; also can I just say how irritated I get by the idea that ponies have no idea what hands and/or fingers are? Numerous creatures in Equestria have hands! Come on, people! You can't even blame Equestria Girls, because this was happened way before that mess. Moving on). Roid Rage/Snowflake has a ridiculously unbelievable cameo near the end. There are nods to all sorts of things, and for the most part, I found them inoffensive, if sometimes a tad mind-boggling.
So, for the most part, this is a really good, really enjoyable story. But it's got some issues, and to discuss those, I need to head into spoilers. I highly suggest that, if you have any interest in this story, you skip down to the bolded rating at the bottom, because you're not going to want to spoil this story before you read it.
Spoilers. Again, spoilers from here on out.
Somewhere in the middle of this, the story loses its way, and never quite recovers. Chapter 6 is where, I believe, the problems really started to be noticeable. When Bon-Bon meets the Bugul Noz, the plot halts abruptly so that we can stand around and world-build. This isn't to say the world-building isn't interesting, for Dromico's take on Faeries is truly fascinating, nor that it is unrelated to the plot, but it definitely could have been parcelled out in a better fashion. (Also, some will find his dialogue hard to read; I didn't, but then I revel in typed vernaculars.) He's also a severe deus ex machina, almost literally, cutting short what otherwise would have been a very long trip. Sure, it would probably have gotten repetitive after a while, but... something different needed to happen.
The third act, after they get to the caves, is just a mess. Action is constantly interspliced with long scenes of standing around, talking. Lyra's role is confusing as all fuck, as she's continually trying to both help and hinder Bon-Bon. There are numerous spots where the plot whips us back and forth, Bon-Bon being forced to leave someone only to come back to them two paragraphs later. It was confusing and slightly irritating. About as irritating was a tendency on the author's part to get really into scene-setting descriptions. Numerous chapters, and even scenes, toward the end open with essentially weather reports, characterless paragraphs of really, really florid description that followed a certain pattern that I can't quite recount. Suffice it to say, once I noticed the pattern, I got a little ticked.
Lastly, there's the way events are handled from the show. A lot of it was clever, like the reasoning behind Luna's missing the whole shebang up in Canterlot. Dromico really weaves that episode pair's plot holes together, but then he overextends himself and lampshades us a "well, this is how it really happened" AU-ing that, while I thought the execution was clever, made me go, "Wait, did you even watch the episode" during the leadup.
None of this ruins the story, per se, but I can't rate it as highly as I think it might otherwise deserve. There are some severe missteps in what is otherwise a well-paced, well-plotted, and severely well-characterized adventure fic. I was a little disappointed that the writing seemed to degrade slightly over time, but the ending was just fine and the ride was, in my opinion, worth it.
You can uncover your eyes now.
4/5
Extremely good, but hampered a bit by its flaws.
Certainly looks like something I'd enjoy reading.
...Except one thing. I see a romance tag. I've found that most authors on this site write romance in a way that usually makes me want to stop reading an otherwise excellent story. So I'm concerned. How is romance handled in this story?
100% agreement in all the word things.
". . . this is full of fanon references."
Cheers PP. I'll pass!
-Scott
1225898
Lyra and Bon-Bon are in a committed relationship. I didn't even realize it was tagged Romance because I consider that to be fact, rather than shipping. :B
1226452
That's why I said it. :B
1226734
Committed relationship? Would it read like the committed relationship Vinyl and Octavia have in Two's Company, Three's a Crowd?
Bah. You people and your shipping nonsense.
1227042
I have not read that and also ScratchTavia is an indescribably inferior shadow of the pure and true love that is LyraBon.
1229050
First, don't read it. It made me cry tears of pain.
Second, in the world of shipping, there is no such thing as "pure and true love"
1229215
THIS IS WHERE YOU ARE WRONG SIR >:V GOOD DAY