I don't typically do this here. · 2:59am Apr 2nd, 2013
But I guess that's why I don't feel bad doing it right now? I dunno, but just lemme ramble.
First off, an announcement:
Riff comics will update less often than before, and probably more sporadically. I'm going to be taking my sweet time with the next, oh I don't know, fifteen or so comics from the marathon because good god so many ponies.
(If you don't want to see me vent and stuff, you can just skip to the bottom for a doodle)
Anyway, I don't give life updates all that often here, but I guess I wanna keep you guys in the loop? I'm kinda tired right now, but I need to vent so bear with me.
PAX was incredible. I've already written about it on Tumblr, so I won't clog up this blog with my recap. Said recap can be found HERE and a couple of photos can be found HERE and HERE.
I've been really down in the dumps for the past week or two, mostly because of my dad. He moved out a year and a half ago, and has slowly been dropping off the face of the earth ever since. I don't see him often, and my younger sister gets to see him even less. It's April, and she's seen him maybe once, and I've seen him three or four times max this year. What's got me really buggered about him though is that he's accusing us of not trying to keep in contact with him. My older sister visited a couple of weeks ago, and she told us that he was really upset because she was "probably the only one who's going to call [him] on [his] birthday." Mind you, it's not for lack of trying to get in touch with him. Problem is, he never picks up his damn phone. Admittedly, I've sort of given up on him, because I've lost every shred of respect I'd ever had for him. He lied about his reasons for not showing up on Thanksgiving, pretty much saying to my face that he doesn't give a shit about anything I have to say. Granted it was in the form of, "Oh, your mother didn't invite me over." "But I did dad." "Oh, it's not the same." (Not to mention he thinks I'm stupid. Found his stash of weed one day, asked him what it was, and he snatched it from me and lied about it. C'mon dad, I went to public high school, and had a friend who loved her weed. I'm not as innocent as you'd like to believe I am.) I guess I'm just really fucking pissed at him for HIS lack of effort in keeping in touch with us. I tried and tried and tried to pick up the slack for so long, and after Thanksgiving I just gave up. I didn't really know what else to do. I was just so tired of being the only one trying. (By only one, I mean between only me and him. My younger sister keeps trying, and somehow my older sister has done a pretty good job of keeping in touch with him) I'm just so exhausted and angry that he's trying to pin the blame on the lack of communication on us.
And then there's Monica.
I graduated last June from a technical high school. It'd been a rough four years. We'd lost two classmates, one to a train, and the other to a car accident. But somehow we made it. We lost another classmate to a car accident involving alcohol a few months ago. And now we've lost another one. She was killed by a drunk driver over the weekend.
I didn't know Monica very well. I really only knew her well enough to be able to pick her face out from a crowd. What I did know about her though, was that she was incredibly nice. I'd never heard a bad word spoken about her. In the three other deaths from the class of 2012, I've never felt so shaken up. I mean, passing sadness and disbelief that they were gone, sure. But I'd never felt as terrible as I do now about any of the other three. It's hard to explain exactly how I feel, but I know it makes me want to sit down and cry every time I start thinking about it.
*sigh* Thanks for putting up with me tonight FiMFiction. Here's the thing I promised:
Good luck with dealing with everything.
I don't really know what I can say to help out. I lost both my parents at a young age. I've watched a friend commit suicide. I served in the military. Death of those closest too us never gets easier. But, you have to move on and make the most out of life. As for your family problems, If he really wants to be with you he will find a way. If he's just trying to play games he will make every excuse in the book not to be there. Simple as that. Take it from someone that's at least 10 years older, if someone truly wants something they will move heaven and earth. I hope that helped, if not I'm sorry. Have a Pinkie, you know she wants to see you smile.
Wow, sounds rough. Don't know much about family problems since I never had to deal with that, but losing friends in college I do know. Lost my best friend due to a shooting at a bar and never really got over that. Turned to alcohol in college when my girlfriend died (got ran over on a sidewalk by a drunk driver). What I can tell you right now is that alcohol, drugs, or any other type of thing that seems to keep the edge off of what you're feeling right now isn't the way to go. Talk to other people, see a therapist if it gets really bad (this option seemed to work for me). Just don't keep it bottled up inside. I wish you luck in the future, and I'll endeavor myself to check out your art from now on. Have a moustache.
About your classmate, distract yourself until you can feel better. You will. Send a card to the family. That is where you can help yourself feel better by helping others fined solace and closure.
About your dad, he doesn't sound like an asshole, just an idiot. But I don't know the details. So expect him to be an idiot, accept him for the idiot he is, and work around his idiocy.
There are no real words to say other then what FP already said "I offer you my sincerest condolences"
Then again this is coming from the desensitized gamer chick who still trhinks a five kill streak is funny "cuse dem nubs"
The best thing to do is just ignore him... i know it's cruel but if hes not gonna make a effort why should you.
Yeah i'm horrible at giving advise.
Pff parents... I have a smiliar issue with my own father, cursed be his rotten soul. I won't get into details (this isn't about me), just suffice to say that I've had my share of shit. Even with that, I'm not even sure if I can give advice that would help. I'll try, though.
Concerning your father, try not to give it too much thought. Yes, you so much want to roll your eyes and sigh at the preposterousness of his words, but he seems to have reached a point where he believes his own lies and there's no way to make him see another perspective. When that moment comes, it's time to just listen to whatever excuses he vomits and put the auto-.nodding-mhmming on, or at least pretending you're paying attention to him. Knowing you can't trust him, wasting brain cells trying to focus on what he says is a waste.
As for Monica... damn, I don't know what to say here because it never happened to me. My advice here? Her family'll surely appreciate your condolences, and some happy thoughts or anecdotes you had with her will help too. It might not look like much, but a beacon of happiness, no matter how dim it is, will ease the burden.
Keep us up to date with whatever happens, Nocti; I'll feel better if I know how you're doing.