A Bunch of Cons Are Coming Up Soon · 4:10am Mar 5th, 2013
So you've been planning this trip for months. You've got your con registration, hotel, and your travel is all worked out -- you roadtrip/fly/take the train/whatever and show up for the con on-time, but in your haste, you've forgotten to shower. Sure, you've spent the past few hours traveling, but it's time to reward yourself by going to the con and meeting up with your friends (or people who pretend to be your friends), so you're just gonna throw on some deodorant and call it a day. Sounds like a plan, right?
Yeah, pretty much. Here's why you're equal parts wrong and stupid:
1.) You've been traveling a lot, passing through all sorts of places from who-knows-where. Let's completely ignore the fact that you probably look and smell like shit, and just say that you've got all sorts of fun microbes and shit (that's kinda literal, by the way) that traveled with you -- this is how diseases manage to travel from one country/continent to another. It's because they traveled on some dumb shmuck like you who thought they were too good for a bath. Protip: You aren't.
2.) It's kind of rude. I know that you're probably going, "But it's my body, I can be a greasy mess if I want!". Well, yeah, you can, but here's the thing: all those friends of yours that you met online and traveled all this way to see you? Their first impression of you is gonna be you looking like the convention-equivalent of Lindsay Lohan, in that it's going to be a train wreck. Not only that, but cons are rather notorious for getting folks sick because, surprise, people don't wash their hands or bathe. If you show up to a con looking and smelling like you haven't bathed in about three days (because you probably haven't), don't be surprised if people refuse to shake hands with you or hug you -- you're probably gonna get the ol' hover hand instead.
Yeah, let's not and say we did. This making sense to you?
Well shit. Alright, here's basically what you need to do:
1.) Do everyone else at the con a favor and bathe at least once a day.
2.) Bring deodorant and actually use it.
3.) Wash your hands after using the bathroom and before eating. Not only does this keep you from passing on anything to anyone else, but it's also gonna help you from getting sick too. Have a CDC vid so you can see how bad you are at handwashing.4.) Carry a bottle of hand sanitizer with you. 60% alcohol or greater is recommended, and general nursing guidelines state that you should use hand sanitizer no more than three times in a row, at which point you should probably use a soap and water. Not saying you should follow this, but it wouldn't hurt.
5.) If you're gonna cough or sneeze, do it into your elbow and not into your hands. If you do cough or sneeze into your hands, I'm probably gonna give you really dirty looks until you go wash 'em.
Okay, so now do you know how to be a basic and respectable human being at cons?
Well fuck you too, see if I try and help again.
Personal hygiene? Pff.
890017
I know, right?
24.media.tumblr.com/96cd1b32d12d7d5ba0e4fe40e68957a9/tumblr_mj66h9KF6V1rgrug4o1_500.png
Bathing? I don't think so. I read "The Witches," I know the real score
I'm carrying a bottle of Lysol. I encounter dirty people at cons, I'll give 'em a free cleaning
Con season.
Maybe it's just the industry I'm in (infosec), but seeing the number of people at cons that pass me at the sink after using the bathroom...
i.imgur.com/pb6efJX.png
For the less slovenly among us, don't touch your face/rub your eyes/eat without washing your hands, because chances are high the people and surfaces around you are disgusting!
Always nice and clean, Cutie Mark Con won't be any different. Anybody wanna hunt me down there then best of luck, I can go all ninja in crowds.
890048 High school, parents, and underage (which means I can't get a job yet, which means I don't have a source of income). Sucks, dunnit?
890085 Good on 'ya.
That nursing school got you drilled huh?
I see where you come from and agree. I can't stand myself if I don't wash myself at least every morning, or whenever I wake up on the weekends. And yeah, people not washing themselves at cons (or anywhere really) is kind of a hard concept for me to understand. I'm a pretty large guy and I know I can have the BO of a soaked bear if I don't do nothing.
So unless you're a gross faggot with a case of swamp-ass, do the world a favor and wash up.
I would only ever go to a con for one reason. To call a bunch of people "con artists". Yes. I'm that annoying.
Finally consider going to one, and now you got me all paranoid thinking these bronycons are full of people like that. I think I'll just watch the stuff over EFN if it strikes my fancy r.r I may seem rude but I don't shake hands outside of job interviews, and even then I feel uncomfortable.
Have you just had this many bad experiences with people that you felt needed blogging about? Or just a rare few encounters? Just curious.
Those seem like fair reasons, if I were to ever go.
890277 I'm suddenly and overwhelmingly interested in your avatar.
You can tell what profession a man has by the advice he gives.
If I didn't already know, that is.
And when you do use deodorant, please for the love of God don't put on five liters of Axe. The commercials lie, just the tiniest bit too much of that shit and you smell AWFUL.
893520 I get that from time to time when it changes