I'm a fairly skilled hermetic wizard, and I could teach you the esoteric arts, if you can prove that you are worthy of my instruction.

Thanks, but please don't send me cash "tips." Instead, support this charity: The Fletcher Street Urban Riding Club.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, take my advice. Pull down your pants and slide on the ice." ~ Dr. Sidney Freedman, M*A*S*H S3 Ep5