All that Glitters is Gold

by Bucephalus

Chapter 3: First impressions last only to the point where you go have a drink together.

All that Glitters is Gold
Chapter 3
First impressions last only to the point where you go have a drink together.

Bathed in the clear light of the sun, De Wallen Street looked nothing like it did during night. The very inconvenient canal that ran through the middle of the main street divided the two sides of the street, and during nighttime, the few bridges that cross said canal were always clogged up with ponies and other creatures. Now, as midday neared, there were considerably less folk around.

It might have had something to do with the alluring red lights that had been turned off, and that there was nopony in the windows that spotted the facades of the many houses. This was the time for the residents of the street, not for the tourists and the locals who tried to hide their vices as well as Berlusconi had hidden his.

There were many types of residents the street had. Most were harmless enough, if weird in their own rights. One type however was especially dangerous. A prime example of this type was just walking down a small alley that ran between the old buildings.

This was the type of stallion that the locals referred to as “wisecolts.” Dressed up in a pinstripe suit and wearing a fedora, the scowling stallion had a gait of somepony who enjoyed scaring others. His lit cigarette hung lazily from his lips as a sign of not paying attention to his surroundings.

Maybe that was why he slightly bumped the golden-maned stallion walking the alley to opposite direction.

“Watch where you’re going, bucko,” the suited up stallion grunted.

“Ah, sorry about that,” the coffee-colored stallion apologized. “I didn’t mean to do that. What I meant to do was… Thiiiiiis!”

As soon as the yell had left the golden-maned stallion’s lips, he swung his jutte down in a heavy arc, holding the weapon between his teeth. The jutte collided painfully with the head of the wisecolt, sending him crashing to the ground. The surprised yell of the suited up stallion was cut short as his muzzle met the cobblestone street at high-speed.

“Oh! Sorry ‘bout that! It looked like somepony had put a turd on your head, but it looks like it was just your hat!” the stallion laughed. “So sorry! About your fashion sense!”

You’re the one whose fashion sense we should feel sorry about, you Boost ‘r Gold.

“Shut up, Narrator!” the stallion shouted. “Gold is great! Gold means money, and money means riches! So gold it is.”

Heaving a tired sigh, the stallion spat out the jutte from his mouth and caught it with his hoof. Then, swiping the mane away from his face, he straightened to his full height.

“And stop with that obfuscation already! The readers already know it’s me!” he shouted. “Everypony’s number one hero: Fool’s Gold!”

Sorry. For a while, I wanted to pretend that we had gotten a hero who was actually worth something.

“Y-you bastard…” the wisecolt, who had been lying on the ground until now, suddenly groaned. “Do you know who you just attacked…? You’ll pay for this, I’ll see to it!”

“Oiiiii, what’s goin’ on here!?” An angry yell echoed from the main street as two creatures, one pony and one gryphon, rushed to the alley.

“Ah, crap!” Gold shouted in shock, backing away from the two.

As the two got closer, it became immediately clear who they were. Both Short Fuse and Ambra had dressed up in similar clothing as the wisecolt still flattened against the ground. They had even gotten fake moustaches from somewhere, though the moustaches made them look more like famous plumber brothers than actually part of the “Family”.

“Joey! Joey! Did ‘dat punk hit ya bad?” Fuse nearly shouted as she rushed to the mobster’s side. “Joey! Talk ta me!”

“W-what the hell!? Who are you!?” The wisecolt asked in growing confusion. “And who’s Joey!?”

“You,” Ambra answered and poked the stallion in his still bleeding head. “Joey the Snuggles. So? Are you okay?”

Unfortunately, because her poke had caused the blood to flow even faster, Ambra was suddenly entranced by it. After about twenty fast pokes, the flow had become more akin to a high-pressure fountain than anything else.

“There ain’t such an idiotic sounding stallion in our group! And it’s definitely not me! I’m One Ear!” The stallion retorted. He then swatted Ambra’s claw away in a panic. “And stop poking me! Despite asking if I’m okay, you’re really into making my situation worse, aren’t you!?”

Despite One Ear’s yells getting louder, Short Fuse adopted an apologetic expression, as if witnessing somepony dying in her hooves.

“Dangit! I can’t save ya, Joey, ya know that!” Fuse cried out. “But I can at least listen ta your final words. But only if they are ‘bout who is blackmailin’ a hostess livin’ in Yoshiwara Street.”

In the background, Ambra switched on the boombox she had found from somewhere only for them to hear the wailing singing of Nick Van Eede resonate from within it.

“I told you I’m One Ear! Look, I even got one ear! And what’s with that suspiciously specific interest!?” One Ear shouted, getting more and more confused. “And somepony stop that damn bird! We can’t afford royalties for that song! Even if it is cornily fitting!”

“Joey, c’mon, ya gotta tell me!” Fuse repeated. “Before ya take your last breath!”

“I ain’t telling you anything!” One Ear answered, frowning heavily. “Who are you creatures, anyho—“

That was as far as the wisecolt got. After all, what replaced his normal voice was a high-pitched screech, caused by Fool’s Gold’s hoof landing straight on the mobster’s nether regions at what was probably supersonic speed. The glare of the gold-maned stallion was something to behold, too.

“Hey. Bastard. We put on this whole show so you could spill the beans nice and easy. Why are you trying to make it harder? Why aren’t you spilling those beans? Why are you instead turning them into methane gas at a rapid rate?” Gold drilled into the stallion with his questions. “We’re trying to be reasonable here, see?”

“H-H-H-How… How is this reasonable!?” One Ear squeaked as Fool’s Gold applied more pressure with his hoof.

“You. Be reasonable too,” Ambra chimed in, and lifted her claw to poke the wound of the stallion once more. “Like, reason and able. We need the info. You can reason from there.”

“It was that kind of ‘reasonable’!?”

As Ambra poked the wound one more time, the amount of blood became something like an assault weapon, striking the gryphon straight into the face and sending her hurtling down the alley. It was also enough for the mobster, as he passed out immediately, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

Fool’s Gold heaved an annoyed sigh.

“So this one’s no good either? Such a troublesome lot, these mobsters,” he said. “This is the seventh already…”

“Erm… Mr. Gold? Are you sure this is the right way to go about your investigation?” A voice asked as a green mare entered the alley, looking rather horrified.

Maccha had been accompanying the trio during their “investigation”, but the longer it continued, the more she started losing hope that they were taking it seriously at all. In fact, their methods seemed to become more and more absurd every time they caught another wisecolt.

Hearing Maccha’s question, Fool’s Gold shook his head and turned to look at the mare.

“We’re not at fault here, you know? I keep waiting for the options of ‘Truth,’ ‘Doubt’ and ‘Lie’ to appear, but there’s been nothing so far. Even though I keep pressing Square the whole time I’m talking, it does nothing,” he answered.

“I pressed a button. Circle. You know. The red one. Red like blood,” Ambra informed from down the alley, still lying on her back having not moved from where she had been thrown by the pressure jet.

“So that’s what the poking thing was?” Maccha asked, looking somewhat squeamish. “No, before that, there’s no ‘Blood’ option from the very start!”

“Now, now, don’t get caught up in the small details, Miss,” Gold assured Maccha and put his front right leg around her shoulders. “We’ll clear this for you, don’t worry.”

“Just be glad ya were a pretty mare,” Short Fuse grunted to Maccha. “If ya looked like the regular customers of Empress, he’d have abandoned your quest in a heartbeat.”

“S-sure…” Maccha fidgeted a bit, looking rather uncomfortable because of this revelation. “I’ll be… glad about it.”

Fool’s Gold spat at the ground, using his magic to take out another cigarette and lighting it up. He then put it to his lips and took a deep drag before puffing out a considerable cloud of smoke. The grey wisps travelled ever upwards, and the eyes of the stallion followed their play.

“We ain’t getting anywhere like this. Besides, I’m getting hungry. Let’s hold a break and think about our tactics,” Gold said and turned to look at Ambra. “Get up, you featherbrain. It’s dinner time.”

Together, the four creatures headed out of the alley, leaving behind the unconscious stallion who had been put through too much in too short an amount of time.

Out in the main street of De Wallen, they followed Fool’s Gold’s lead. The stallion seemed to know exactly where he was going. He crossed a bridge, taking them to the other side, before heading towards the other end of the district. The amount of ponies and other creatures started to grow the closer they got the district’s border. Amongst these normal citizens were ponies dressed the same way that their latest victim had been. Still, even though Short Fuse grew more and more nervous, Fool’s Gold seemed to think nothing of it. He even nonchalantly used his jutte to pick his nose, as if nothing was wrong.

Eventually, they stopped in front of a small restaurant right at the edge of the canal. Wonderful aromas floated from inside, and they could hear cheerful chatter resonate from within the establishment. Putting away his jutte, Gold opened the door and stepped in, raising his left front hoof in a greeting.

“Yo, Pops. I came to eat again,” he announced. “A table for four, please.”

“A’igh,” an old-looking stallion behind the counter said. He then turned to yell to a nearby pony. “Hey, part-timer! Get these four a table!”

“Please, follow me.” The part-timer nodded to the group.

He led them to a corner of the restaurant, to a table that was just big enough to accommodate them all. As the four had sat down, the stallion took four menus from the nearby table, handing them over to the group. While Short Fuse, Ambra and Maccha immediately started going over the menus, Fool’s Gold kept staring at the part-timer.

“Wordwise. I was hoping you’d be here,” Gold said to the waiter, arching an eyebrow.

The pegasus stallion standing next to the table chuckled. He cracked his neck, allowing his long, blue mane to swish back and forth, creating a perfect contrast with his lemon-colored coat. Standing there, wearing a bow tie and a black vest, he seemed like nothing more than your typical underpaid part-timer who wanted nothing more than to punch their boss’ teeth in.

“Isn’t that always the case, Goldie? Well, what’s the problem this time? Some job again?” Wordwise asked.

“W-wait. Wordwise?” Short Fuse’s head jolted up, hearing the name of the waiter. “As in, the former member of the Wonderbolts… That Wordwise!?”

“Yeah. This idiot’s the former star,” Fool’s Gold said while stumping his cigarette on an ashtray. “However, he’s got this nasty compulsive need to find out all the secrets he can. You can imagine that didn’t go well with the female members of the team.”

“That didn’t mean that Spitfire had to literally spit fire in my direction. I walked around with a natural perm for the next two months,” Wordwise said and sighed. “But, how about you order first, and we’ll talk while you eat? The spaghetti of this place is especially good.”

After taking the orders of the group, Wordwise headed towards the kitchen. He disappeared behind the doors, leaving the four to themselves. All around them, both the customers and the waiters seemed to be making an awful lot of racket. They argued, laughed, told exaggerated stories, and seemed to be having a good time. However, one thing in this felt weird for Short Fuse.

“Sorry, but… Ain’t this restaurant a bit wrong? I mean, spaghetti? An’ this environment?” She asked. “Don’t ya think this clashes a bit with the culture of the actual street?”

“Now, now, don’t think too hard about it,” Fool’s Gold assured her. “Sure, the street was originally purely Canterlot style, but since the wisecolts are in charge these days, it’s changed. Nowadays, even Luigi would feel right at home here, and could drown his sorrows in the local bars. It’s not easy being the second-best, after all.”

“Show a little respect for Luigi!” Short Fuse reprimanded him. “He ain’t got it easy, ya know!?”

Before the two could delve any deeper into their absurd argument, they were cut short by Wordwise returning carrying multiple plates with his wings.

“Here are your orders. One Trenetto al Pesto, one Fettucine all’Alfredo, one Spaghetti Aglio e Oglio…” Wordwise gave the dishes to Short Fuse, Ambra and Maccha respectively. “… and one Rigatoni alla Carbonara.”

As the last plate was put in front of hungry-looking Fool’s Gold, Fuse nearly spat out the water she had been drinking.

“W-wait a damn minute!” She shouted, pointing at the plate. “That’s meat, right!? You’re seriously eatin’ meat! What the heck, we’re herbivores, ain’t we!? What’s up with that, then!?”

“What are you talking about, Fuse?” Gold asked, already digging into his pasta. “Meat contains many nutrients that are necessary for one’s body. It’s not good to eat only vegetables and the like.”

“It is for ponies!”

As it became clear that Short Fuse’s protests were falling on deaf ears, the mare had no choice but to try to ignore the plate of the stallion next to her. For a while, the four focused completely on eating, as it had been a while since their last meal. Wordwise humbly stayed beside them, waiting for them to finish. Occasionally he kept eyeing at the other customers of the restaurant, but always turned his gaze back at the four.

“So… As you probably guessed, I need your help,” Fool’s Gold finally said to Wordwise, having finished the pasta. “Specifically, I need your knowledge about the local mobsters.”

“Ya sure Wordwise knows? He looks kinda worthless,” Short Fuse asked, and Ambra nodded next to her.

“Like a sock. Unwashed for a week.”

“You sure picked some interesting companions, Goldie,” Wordwise said while trying to fake a laugh. “However, I can assure you that I am not all talk. For example, let’s see… You, Short Fuse, were once suspended from active duty because you inserted your sword vertically into the posterior of your superior after he took away the television in the female barracks.”

Short Fuse looked shocked, as if lightning had struck her.

“And you, Ambra…” Wordwise continued, “Once halted the entire postal service of Canterlot after you fell asleep on-duty and your drool seeped into the printing press, causing it to overload.”

A similiar verbal thunderbolt seemed to strike the gryphon, as she followed the example set by Short Fuse earlier.

“Ahahaha… quite impressive, Mr. Wordwise,” Maccha hurried to intervene. “But, could we… talk about the current case?”

“Yeah. Let’s stick to the matter at hoof. You see, this lady here has a bit of a problem.” Fool’s Gold pointed at Maccha. “Apparently somepony has knowledge about her former relationship with that bigwig aristocrat, High Hopes. And now they demand 20,000 bits, or they’ll reveal the whole thing, destroying both the career of High Hopes and this mare’s reputation. The whole thing stinks of the work of this street’s mafia.”

Wordwise squinted his eyes, leaning to the wall while he thought. Finally, after a few seconds had passed, he began talking.

“… I don’t believe it’s the work of the mafia. You see, the local mafia is in cahoots with High Hopes. They plan to help High Hopes into an influential position, and use him as a puppet to further their own goals.”

“Influenza position?” Ambra asked. “Sick group.”

“I said influential position, you birdbrain. Anyways…” Wordwise cleared his throat. “The mafia wouldn’t ruin their own plans like that. There must be some other culprit behind this blackmail attempt, who either wants to get rich through the mistakes of others, or put the whole plan of the mafia in jeopardy.”

“At least he could’ve made Trebek announce the whole thing. This wouldn’t be such a problematic job in that case…” Fool’s Gold sighed. “Anyways, if the mafia is actually on the side of High Hopes, what sort of idiot would try to pull a stunt like this? Considering Maccha here is but a hostess, there ain’t any way she could come up with 20,000 bits that quickly. The whole scheme is bound to… fail…”

Fool’s Gold’s eyes slowly turned to look at Maccha, who seemed to be flustered for once again being the center of the attention. Short Fuse, unable to see what it was that Gold had realized, turned her attention to Wordwise.

“W-what is it? What’s the deal?” she asked. Wordwise shook his head.

“Neighponese ponies put personal honor above anything else. In the event they would be shamed publically…” The stallion with the steel blue mane looked at Maccha. “… there’s only one path a Neighponese can take… Right?”

“Y-yes…” Maccha answered, her head drooping. “The only way to preserve my family’s and the club’s honor would be… to commit seppuku.”

“Ya plannin’ ta off yourself!?” Fuse’s eyes widened in a shock. “I ain’t lettin’ that happen, ya know!”

“Me neither,” Ambra chimed in. “Ambra and Maccha. Friends.”

“Yeah, I agree,” Fool’s Gold said and his eyes narrowed. “I’m not letting a pretty little mare kill herself just like that. However, this raises a question: A murder, even something like this, doesn’t stem just from a scandal of a politician having an affair with a hostess. There’s something more to this.”

Lighting another cigarette, Fool’s Gold adopted an unusually stern expression as he stared at Maccha, who was shaking like a leaf of a tree.

“… Maccha. What are you not telling us?”

****

Next day, at midday, a single figure draped in a thick cloak was waiting on the rooftop of an old factory in the Shangri-La district. He kept pacing back and forth, while staring intently into the distance. From what little of his muzzle could be seen, it was clear that the figure was sweating bullets at the moment. All in all, even without his highly-visible Nazgul-costume he would have seemed awfully suspicious.

“S-shut up! I’m trying to be discreet here!” The creature screamed.

Ho ho, what a nervous wreck. But I guess I’ll leave the heroics to the actual characters.

As if that was the cue, the door leading to the staircase nearby suddenly started to open. The metal door creaked heavily as it swung outwards, revealing the figure of a green mare standing behind it along with a trio of two ponies and one gryphon. The only stallion of the group was carrying a large suitcase between his teeth.

“… I’ve come to bring the money you wanted,” Maccha said with a nervous voice, stepping forward.

This seemed to shock the figure in the cloak greatly. As Fool’s Gold threw the suitcase in front of him, he took a few steps backwards, as if he wanted nothing to do with the suitcase. He stopped his pacing, but it was replaced by shaking, like an addict who was going through symptoms of withdrawal.

“What’s wrong?” Maccha asked, trying her best to sound brave. “You… You look surprised.”

“H-how did you get all that money? You’re just a hostess!” The cloaked figure accused her. “There’s no way you could ordinarily get that sort of money gathered in few days!”

“I made some… some deals,” Maccha answered and tried to flash a smile. “These three are part of the yakuza who controls the Yoshiwara Street. I took a loan, and they even gave me b-bodyguards to make sure the transaction went well.”

“Idiot! Why are you always such a stupid mule, Maccha!?” The cloaked figure shouted. “You’ll never be able to pay them back!”

“That’s my own problem… isn’t it, High Hopes?” Maccha’s eyes narrowed as she stared at the stallion.

Hearing that name, the cloaked figure spat at the ground. Grudgingly, he removed his hood, revealing the head of a somewhat handsome stallion hidden underneath. He had a blue coat and white mane, the latter combed in regent style. It was indeed the nowadays-influential politician, High Hopes, and his eyes were flaring with anger.

Seeing now who was behind the blackmail attempt, Short Fuse gasped internally. While Fool’s Gold had his suspicions from before, she hadn’t been completely sure about it.

“Hey, you!” High Hopes shouted to Fool’s Gold. “She said you were from the yakuza, right? Want to earn some quick money?”

“… What’cha got in mind?” Gold grunted, eyeing High Hopes up and down. The blue stallion gave a sinister smirk.

“You see, this mare here has probably told you all about her sob story about big bad politician trying to blackmail her. Well, you only know half of the truth,” High Hopes said and chuckled. “She’s been leading you by the muzzle all this time. Lying and cheating is all she does!”

“…What do you mean?” Fool’s Gold asked with narrowed eyes.

“She’s just a pathological liar! This isn’t anything as cute as a scandalous relationship! She’s a criminal who deserves to die for her lies!” High Hopes shouted, pointing an accusing hoof at Maccha, who flinched back. “No, that’s not even the full extent of it. She’s not even a ‘she’ in the first place! Yes! This hostess you call ‘Maccha’ is nothing but a transgender freak who thought he could make a fool out of me!”

There was a shocked silence on the rooftop. All eyes turned to Maccha, who was trembling more than ever before. Her, no, his legs looked like they were about to give out at any second.

“B-but you told me I was beautiful!” Maccha shouted back, tears forming in his eyes. “You told me you loved me! I thought you were speaking the truth!”

“And I was!” High Hopes roared. “Until you revealed your true colors, you sickening piece of trash! I want nothing to do with an unnatural freak like you! It’s disgusting to even think that I kissed you or let you touch me! If word got out that I was tricked by such a fake mare, I’d be laughed out of Canterlot! Vile abominations like you are better off dead!”

Every insult that left High Hopes’ lips seemed to be like a punch straight to the gut of Maccha. He faltered and collapsed to the floor, before tears began streaming down his face. It took all of Ambra’s and Short Fuse’s willpower to not run to console her, but this was not the time. While High Hopes had rambled on, Gold had grown more and more silent, the expression on his face darkening.

“And?” Fool’s Gold finally asked. “What do you want me to do?”

“Kill him! Kill that wretch!” High Hopes hissed. “I’ll let you have the money in that suitcase as a payment. You’ll get rich, and neither of us have to mention this to our superiors! The world is better off without a disgusting freak like him, too! So, everypony wins!”

There was a moment of silence. Then, slowly, Fool’s Gold used his magic to draw his jutte from his mane, swinging it to his side. He then slowly turned, walking a circle around High Hopes, while keeping his cold eyes at Maccha.

“You’re right. This situation is in dire need of a beating.”

“Hah! Hear that, Maccha!?” High Hopes shouted and sneered. “Even your supposed bodyguards are disgusted by your true nature. Somepony who lies about their own gender, both to himself and to others, deserves to be treated like an abomination! This is what you get when you think you can get away with making a fool out of me! Ha, hahaha—“

As overblown as High Hopes’ laugh was, it was utterly drowned as the two creatures beside Maccha started roaring in laughter. With stupid looks on their faces, they bellowed out as loud as they could, staring straight at the blue stallion. Both Ambra and Short Fuse laughed as hard as they could, so hard that it made their eyes water. But they did not care. Instead, they turned the volume louder.

“W-what do you two think you’re laughing about!?” High Hopes shouted. “What’s so damn funny!?”

“This,” Short Fuse finally answered and showed a small box she was holding in her right hoof. “It’s a recorder. One that recorded ‘dat whole tirade just now. I’m gonna guess that the Canterlot police force, not ta mention the Princess herself, would be interested ta hear about your opinion on who deserves ta live ‘n who deserves ta die.”

“The disgusting freak…” Ambra said, pointing at High Hopes. “…is you.”

“W-what are you talking about!? Have you gone insane!?” High Hopes roared in confusion. “Can’t you see how disgusting he is!? He’s a freak! An abomination that tries to be what he’s not! He goes against the laws of nature! Even your Boss agreed with me!”

This last remark caused Short Fuse to snicker, even though she had already stopped laughing. She pointed behind High Hopes, raising her eyebrows.

“Oh, I think ya misunderstood him,” Short Fuse said and cackled. “Ya see, Maccha told us everything before we came here. All about his secret, and how he ain’t feelin’ like he’s a stallion but a mare. An’ guess what? We don’t care about that.”

“Maccha is Maccha,” Ambra chimed in. “So who cares?”

“An’ there’s one other thing,” Fuse continued with a grin. “Ya see, our Boss… he’s a complete idiot. He don’t care if it’s a mare or a stallion, as long as they’re pretty. An’ if they are… then he’ll do anything ta help them.”

High Hopes heard the wind rush behind him and slowly turned to look. To his horror, he saw how Fool’s Gold spun his jutte around, caught it with his mouth, and turned around in a fast motion. The momentum sent him flying straight at the blue stallion, and for a moment, the politician saw nothing but the approaching metal of the weapon. Then, with a loud and resonating crash, the jutte hit High Hopes straight in the head. The impact was enough to send him flying high in the air. Fool’s Gold, with a determined look in his eyes and gritting the weapon tightly with his teeth, grunted.

“This town is my home. Don’t you think for a minute that I wouldn’t help my friends who live here!”

High Hopes let out a pitiful sound as he began to fall. He crashed into the roof, the concrete below him cracking from the impact. The eyes of the stallion had rolled to the back of his head, and his mouth hung open absentmindedly. With a single hit from the jutte of Fool’s Gold, it was lights out for him.

Silence descended once again to the rooftop. Now there was nothing more moving besides the trio who had watched the climax of their scheme unfold before their eyes. What they had planned after Maccha had come clean had all paid out in the end. Testament to this was the sight of the golden-maned stallion standing before their eyes, his mane gently caressed by the wind and his form outlined by the blazing sun.

“Now then…” Fool’s Gold said, and spat out the weapon from his mouth.

“I guess we should get outta here, before the police we called arrive. Just remember to leave the recorder.”

And so, the four creatures made haste, leaving behind a single criminal and the evidence of his crime.

****

Late that evening, the hostess club Tenjiku was once again filled to brim with customers. Ponies, gryphons and all sorts of creatures had gathered there to enjoy the company of beautiful mares and alcohol. There was singing, there was laughing, there was flirting - all happening under colorful lights and graceful Neighponese architecture. On the stage, three mares played traditional instruments of their homeland, while near the eastern wall was a long counter where multiple bartenders made drinks for the customers.

It was in the middle of this hustle and bustle that the members of Gold Standard had gathered. They had been directed to a corner table, out of sight from most of the customers. Ambra, the kid she was, was already asleep on the couch. Short Fuse kept eyeing the place with frown on her face while sipping on her piña Colada. The blue mare had a hard time accepting the behavior of the creatures who visited such a place. However, being a young mare, she couldn’t help but to have a slightly perverted interest.

“Who are ya callin’ perverted, ya damn Narrator!?”

Meanwhile, only Fool’s Gold seemed to be excited. He was downing his third whiskey already and was waiting anxiously for the hostess that had been assigned to their table. The cigarette on his lips was nearly burned out, as he had been smoking it in haste as if it would have made the hostess appear any sooner.

Eventually his wait was rewarded, as a pony in yukata approached the table. Giving a graceful Neighponese bow, the pony in question raised his gaze to meet the eyes of the trio. Even Ambra had woken up by his arrival.

“Welcome to the Hostess Club Tenjiku,” the pony greeted them. “I am your hostess for tonight: Maccha. I hope I am to your liking.”

“Woah, woah. This is unexpected,” Fool’s Gold said and jabbed Short Fuse in the ribs. “Just how much money did you spend? You got us the best hostess in the club.”

“Well, I thought we’d splurge a bit,” Fuse answered and chuckled. “Ya know, since we did a good job.”

“Party night,” Ambra chimed in. “Totally newscasted.”

“You’re a minor. No alcohol for you.” Fool’s Gold swatted the gryphon playfully. “But you know, she’s speaking the truth. Since the Empress is paying for the night, I thought about going all-out. You sure you’ll be alright, Maccha? I’m gonna drink till the sun climbs to the horizon, and way past it. And since you’re our hostess, I’ll have you keep me company till I drop.”

Short Fuse chuckled and grinned.

“I was thinkin’ the exact same thing,” she said. “So, ya think you’re up for it?”

And so, face-to-face with the grins of the three idiots, Maccha returned the grins with a beaming smile of his own, one that was like the dawning sun.

“Yes!” He answered, happier than he had been in years.

And so, it is with these thoughts and these words that we end this chapter of the story.

****
All that Glitters is Gold
Chapter 3: End.

Once again, Minuette and Twinkleshine were sitting in the otherwise empty theater, gazing at the now dark silver-screen. Minuette was leaning on the seat on the row next to her with a dull look on her face. Twinkleshine, seeing this, jabbed her friend to the ribs. This finally woke the blue mare from her lull.

“How can you sleep through the show like that?” Twinkleshine asked. “You should be ashamed!”

“What do you mean?” Minuette groaned. “There’s no great sense of adventure, no good jokes, and the characters are just horrible.”

“Exactly!” Twinkleshine answered. “That means we’ve got the best seats in the house to watch this fanfic’s downfall!”

The two mares bumped their hooves together and burst into bellowing laughter which echoed in the empty movie theater.

“Do-ho-ho-ho-hoh!”

Comments

[kamil]

So... Crossdressing or was there actually some surgical/magical procedure at some point?

[Bucephalus]

2071316
Cross-dressing, in this case. He is a very feminine stallion from the get-go, so simply putting on cute clothes and tying up his mane makes him pass for an equally cute mare. But as the characters mention in the chapter, his gender is hardly the issue at hand.

[kamil]

2072621
That's good, I like crossdressing but there's not a whole lot of it going on when most characters don't wear clothes anyway. I hope Maccha becomes a recurring character, I need my sexy trap action!

[Bucephalus]

2073265
Oh, Maccha will be a recurring character. He works in the building next door, after all. Plus, considering the badass boast Fool's Gold made knocking out High Hopes, somepony might have developed a little crush on him...

[Telaros]

That's one way to *puts on shades* 'skirt' an issue!
YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHH~

Ok, so not really skirting so much as trying to divert attention from it. This seems a bit racey but, I personally have no issues with the whole crossdressing or transgender parts. The one issue I always had with those kind of people though are the ones who 'brag about how they tricked' or 'how many they turned over' bs like being pretty enough to pass as a female gives them some excuse to ignore the fact they are fucking around with people's actual feelings here.

Maccha wasn't probably expecting to fall in love with the guy, as past chapter mentions I believe, and you never know when or where you'll meet that someone that ignites that spark within you. She tried even being honest with him when things started to get really personal and she felt safe to share the secret. That last part is me trying to fill in the gaps, unless High Hopes only learned that *after* going down back on Maccha.

I don't blame or dislike people like Maccha, it's what they believe is really them. What I will say is Macccha and a lot of other transgenders tend to do is try to hide that fact for so long that by the time it comes out, it's always almost when they have to come to terms they will be finding out if their lover gets anymore intimate with them. Rather than finding out sooner, being open a bit down the road but before the other invests too much time in teh relationship, they should be honest and respectful that love will not form from a lie. Rare exceptions perhaps, but mostly it breeds hate and distrust, and worst of all prejudice towards them.

High Hopes felt betrayed, used, lied to. That the one he fell in love with was just some 'sick' stallion that wanted to get all over his meat. I can't say I like what High Hopes did to Maccha... that was pretty fucking evil... but depending on how long that relationship went on, how genuine that love became from what High Hopes mentions him actually having felt true about his feelings for Maccha, it's hard to say anything other than High Hopes went to extremes and lashed out on Maccha who also loved him. HH was more angry at himself probably and filled his broken heart with bitterness and hate.

There was no clear winner here, but this is a true reality that transgenders that toy around with people's hearts face. It's all fun and games until they break someone and put themselves in high jeopardy. And not even Trebek be able to save your ass with a daily double. Being a crossdresser and or wanting to go all the way to be the you you believe yourself to be is fine, but any form of deceit just to make your fantasy to be seen as a woman in your potential partners eyes and only wanting him to believe its real just to satisfy your own wants is the only thing I feel High Hopes would be correct in thinking as being sick and unfair.

I'm gender neutral. I personally have no issues with what anyone's life style is. But, having been around enough of the bad and disgusting parts of the transgender world, and a lot can be found in the U.S. touhou fandom for example, are rather sick in the head who don't care what the 'victim' feels like and that everyone hates on transgenders because they just like to hate on things they don't understand. Well, that is a load of BS because from the threads and RL experience with friends, I can assure you that it's the deceitful nature that some of them and tehir friends take upon the masses that gives transgenders and cross-dressers a bad name.

****

Well, that got lengthy. Now shit that actually has to do with the story!

Short Fuse: Needless to say, the chapter was ok. But, I'm finding that Short Fuse seems to be losing some of her accent. She seemed to have devolved a bit in personality. Yet, that Ambrio and Fusiji bit was cute. She sort of regained some of her accent there. I liked what you had going in Ch.1 and 2 was nice, but here she seems to be getting OOC in tone.

Ambra: I keep forgetting she's just a kid xD her playful antics and dismissive personality with her heavily lazed mannerisms is still charming. While the chapter was rather draggy, she kept it going for me.

Fool's Gold: He... I can't quite put my finger on it but, he really seemed one-dimensional? He's been getting quite boring. I think he just suffers from lack of someone to play off of as well as he did in chapter 1. Had a couple good scenes, but for a main character Fuse and Ambra steal the spotlight quite a bit here.

Narrator: Damn it you made me laugh hard at one scene in particular... I think it was something about impressions or what was being said about the cloaked figure... Point is narrator needs more snarkiness xD maybe he actually had plenty of coffee during this chapter and wasn't as moody?

Maccha: If I was High Hopes I'd a shagged ya so bucking hard. But, responsibilities and all that would take precedence over my own happiness. She's such a cute character— it's disrespectful to call them anything but the gender they see themselves as btw, gotta work on keeping Maccha SHE unless a character brings up his gender or refuses to acknowledge it —it's a shame that things turned out so bad, but from the ending and Fuse's 'Gold don't care long as it's pretty, he'll help them out" line might suggest that he might have a cute groupie with how things ended. Overall, Maccha was a nice character, sort of the shy character that isn't all too over the top like the Fuse and Gold or as childish as Ambra.

Overall, the few jokes before the latter half leading to the climax was alright. Dragged a bit and Fuse's lines felt devoid of character here and there. Fool's lines were not all that interesting but he's just a follow his ideals/heart sort of guy. The confrontation when you did the reveal lead me to believe that perhaps he *did* want Maccha to reveal the secret and maybe run off with her or something because he knew the Mafia was going to try and control the senate or whatever he was supposed to be, and wanted to foil their plans some how.... but then I realized a lot of things wouldn't of made sense and I learned to mentally shut up and kept reading!

That whole thing before he tried to get the 'Yak'uza to turn on Maccha, I could of sworn he felt some form of concern for Maccha knowing she'd never be able to pay teh Yakuza back and probably end up dead anyways. BOY did you fool me! That could of lead to a whole spiral of the gang getting mixed with the mafia that was set out to use High Hope for political control over sections of Canterlot and a big ol'messy mess of flank kickery that could put the lot of them in even bigger perils!

The latter half and the decision to go with the way you went worked out well in any case, I enjoyed it a lot. Could of turned into a bigger shit storm and Maccha somehow convincing the dofus to see that her feelings and despite what she is were still real. I can't wait to read the next one.

P.S. I promise I won't type this much next time :P Just some of the way you wrote a scene almost too dismissively despite the complexity within it felt like it needed addressing.

[Themaskedferret]

*Grins and shakes head* Very nice stuff, Is Fuse deliberately starting to drop her accent more? Also small typo prtinting

[OBSIDI4N_DR4G0N]

.. so is fool's gold bi-sexual or pan-sexual? straight or gay? cause i really can't tell at this point (chapter 3).