USE OC TAG!
ARGH
AAAAAAARGH

(Joke) Alt. Title: Dumb And Humance: OC Tag? We Don't Need No Stinkin' OC Tag!
Also, when's "humance" gonna catch on as an actual fanfiction term?

I think luna fell in love too fast don't you think?
It's quite good, I'm waiting for MOAR! In the end he was like: That ass.

Hmm will have to read this. I loved your last romance story, and i can only see the war side plot spicing this up.

Edit: Ok, after reading the first chapter you got me hooked. a fave and a like for you my friend

1952780

Did you miss the whole "Six months later" part?

indeed, even if he added the whole -six months later- just reading how they interacted and how luna came to start loving him is the DELICIOUS part of any story

First few paragraphs= someone's been watching Monty python lately

Luna. What are you doing?

1952663 I'm just gonna take a quote from Spike and twist it around a bit.
"You know, the serious voice routine would work well if he did not have that avatar..."

2034336 but this is like 6 months ish later how is that too fast

Yeah, I'm gonna agree with those who say Luna fell in love too fast. It is like getting railroaded by a semi-truck. We're not given the small vignettes of interactions that propel or cause her to be attracted/ love Claire. Just time pass, and Luna loves Claire. As a reader, that point is blase. I'd encourage you to paint us a picture, flesh out the relationship scenes between them. Why is luna attracted to a ape looking alien, is she a xenophile? Does she have a muscle fetish, and likes the muscular build of the soldier? Is she seeing his weaponry in sexually suggestive contexts? Because, from what I've read so far, Claire's keeping their relationship professional, and luna swore off love, and now she's acting like a whore, trying to get him to bed her? Yeah, the relationship dynamics between Luna and Claire really need more work done.

2164131
How do we know it was too fast?
I don't remember it ever telling us how long it's been since he joined the guard. He could have been there for a year for all we know.

2164131
3264131
It has been an off page\camera six months so its possible she found his soft side after all the told not shown time spent.