Two Meatbags And A Robot In Equestria

by Bendy

Ponyville

Fry (whom was being carried by Leela), Bender, Twilight Sparkle (whom levitated the gems and bottles of wine Bender had stolen from Rarity), Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity and Spike left behind the destruction that the Planet Express Ship made when it crash landed.

Almost wordlessly they made their way out of the darkness of the Everfree Forest to head to the safety of Ponyville. Until Rarity's eyes suddenly widen with a look of panic on her face.

"Opalescence!" she shouted.

"Don't worry she's OK, I saw her in Ponyville when I flew back." said Rainbow Dash.

"Oh." she said sounding relieved.

"Are we there yet Leela?" said Fry.

Leela sighed in annoyance.

"Don't even start Fry."

They bypassed the remains of the Timberwolves without a word, and then soon enough they found themselves in the outskirts of the Everfree Forest, where the lights of Ponyville could be seen.

"My poor home." said Rarity with tears in her eyes seeing what's left of her home.

While Fluttershy gave Rarity a hug Twilight had levitated Rarity's gems and wine over to her own non destroyed house, once the gems and wine where there she opened the door with magic, she then threw the gems into a corner on the floor, but gently placed the wine on a small wooden table near the stairs.

Back outside Bender waved his arms in the air excitedly.

"Hey, I remember this place! I robbed Rarity's house here!"

"Well duh Bender!" shouted Rarity.

"Hey! I gotta make room by deleting some memory for the porno I've backed up! Wouldn’t want it to get corrupted, seeing how I got so many viruses."

"If it's deleted, how do you remember it?" said Leela.

"Well I don't really delete them, I compressed the files to make room for my porno, which means old files can restore themselves when you see stuff you saw before or heard before, thus making me feel surprised every time---

"Are you small? Get genetic engineering done for a supersize!" said Bender as his voice suddenly changed to a robotic female voice.

With his right hand Bender banged his chest.

"Shut up virus!" he shouted.

"Those ads make me feel so insecure." said Fry.

"Don't worry Fry, I love you just the way you are."

"That's because you have really low standards Leela." thought Bender to himself.

Pinkie Pie glared at him angrily.

"You're really mean Bender." she said.

"Did she just read my thoughts?" thought Bender. "Nah, it couldn’t be." Pinkie Pie winked at him. "She did just read my thoughts."

"I was right!" shouted an excited female voice. Then with a flash of light Lyra appeared before Fry and Leela. "I knew Humans existed!"

"How do you know what they are?" said Twilight.

"Honestly Twilight, have you ever read books about the mythology of Humans?"

"Um no."

"I can't blame her for not reading those books, for Humans suck!" said Bender.

Lyra turned around to face Bender with fire in her eyes.

"WHAT?!" she shouted

"I want to kill all Humans!"

Tears began to form in Lyra's eyes.

"You … want ... to … kill … all … Humans?"

"Yeah!"

"I WON'T LET YOU!" she screamed in anger while her horn flowed with a green aura.

Another green aura had surrounded Bender's body lifting him twenty feet into the air.

"Let me go!" Bender shouted as he extended his arms toward Lyra to try hit her, however his arms were pushed back by a magical force which tangled them around his body in a mess. "Oh crap, I'm boned!" he screamed as Lyra slammed him down onto the ground causing everyone watching to flinch. "Ow!" she then lifted him back up. "Oh no! Not again!" he screamed as he was slammed back down onto the ground again. "Ow!"

"Relax!" shouted Leela.

Lyra held Bender in mid air just when she was about to slam him onto the ground again with his body only an inch off the ground.

"Yeah, Bender's harmless." said Fry.

"Yes, I'm harmless! Just let me go!" he shouted.

Both of the green auras around Lyra's horn and Bender's body faded away, and since Bender was only an inch off the ground he landed lightly.

Bender's arms detached themselves out from their sockets, followed by self untangling themselves, then stuck them themselves back into Bender's sockets, and then Bender stood back up.

"So are you good Humans who will help us get an intergalactic civilization, or evil Humans that will enslave us, make glue out from us and eat us?"

"Uh, good Humans." said Fry.

"Good! I was wondering if we could make a hybrid species of a Pony and a Human, or perhaps a centaur?"

"Hey! Fry's my man!" shouted Leela.

"Aww!" she said sadly. "Can you share him?"

"No!"

Lyra ears lowered as sadness swept across her face with some tears forming in her eyes.

"Oh... okay then." she said in a low voice.

Lyra sadden that she was rejected walked away looking down at the ground.

As Lyra walked away she thought to herself. "I was a little too forward. Oh, I do dislike that Humans are mostly monogamous. But at any rate, I should have come up with a better pickup line than that. But at least I have my dear Bon Bon."

With Lyra gone they made their way over to the remains of Rarity's home, where a large crowd of Ponies talked among themselves in hushed tones while some stared at; Fry, Leela and Bender.

"What the hell are you looking at?!" shouted Bender waving his right fist at them threateningly.

The crowd of Ponies ran off into their homes.

"Watch yourself Bender." said Twilight with her eyes narrowed while she threateningly flowed a purple aura around her horn.

"OK OK!" he shouted.

Twilight lifted the Planet Express Ship into the air with levitation, then span it upright in mid air, followed by gently placing it next to Rarity's house.

"Well whaddya know, I could have levitated it."

"So you wrecked my home for nothing?!" shouted Rarity.

"I'm sorry!"

"I won't forgive you unless you pay for the damage."

"I will!"

Rarity hugged Twilight, followed by giving her a reassuring pat on the back.

"Good, then I forgive you."

"I want a hug now!" shouted Bender.

Pinkie Pie jumped into Bender's arms to give him a hug, which Bender strangely enough returned and also rubbed his left hand through her mane.

"You're not all that bad are you Bender?" said Pinkie Pie staring into his eyes.

"I don't want a hug now!"

Despite not wanting a hug anymore Bender had gently placed Pinkie Pie back down on the ground.

"He must be trying to hide his sensitive side with his masculinity." thought Pinkie Pie to herself.

"Is there any weapons on that ship we should be worried about?" said Twilight.

"No, the ship's weapons are seemingly all broken."

"Oh."

Leela placed Fry down at the foot of the ship's steps.

"Bender, open your chest cabinet." said Leela.

"Why?"

"I'm confiscating your chain saw."

"Hey, it's my chain saw!"

"What you have is a potentially dangerous weapon."

"Weapon?!" shouted the Mane six and Spike.

"Alright fine, I'll hand it over."

Bender opened his chest cabinet and handed Leela the chain saw.

Leela took her wrist thingy off, then gestured for Twilight to take both her wrist thingy and chain saw. So Twilight took them both with levitation magic.

"Keep them safe, and for all that is good do not mess with them."

"But the device that was on your wrist looks harmless?"

"It can fire a laser beam capable of both burning and generally destroy flesh."

Fluttershy's eyes widen from picturing a horrible mental image of poor animals being killed with such a weapon, thus caused her to vomit profusely on the ground

"Why would you have such a cruel weapon?" shouted Fluttershy.

"I take it your a bunch of peace loving environmental hippies!" shouted Bender.

Fluttershy flew towards Bender's face to give him The Stare making Bender nervous.

"And what are Humans like robot? Are they a warlike race of savages?"

"Uh, not so much any more. Mostly because the Omicronians are by far the most feared alien race in the entire universe."

"Why are they feared?"

"Their military might is vastly superior than any race in the universe."

"If that's true, have they taken over the universe?"

"No, but I think they very well could if they wanted to. Luckily they keep to themselves most of the time, leaving all the other races, including robots like myself scared shitless of their next crazy demands."

"Oh."

"They've also been known to destroy entire planets over the most ridiculous of things."

Spike and the Mane Six gasped in horror.

"Why?"

"Like one of Lrrr's favorite TV shows from a thousands years ago being canceled."

"That's insane. Destroying an entire planet over one of his favorite type of shows that you call a “TV Show” being canceled?"

"Yep."

"Insane!" she shouted.

"Yeah Fluttershy, even I can see why the Omicronians are feared." said Rainbow Dash.

"Look, it's been a tiring day. We'll talk more tomorrow. Goodnight." said Leela."

All the Mane Six in general waved at them and said goodnight.

"Goodnight!" said Spike.

Leela picked Fry back up, then carried him up the ship's steps.

"I need to go toilet Leela." he said in a low voice.

"OK."

Bender went inside the ship shortly after Leela .

***

Everypony went home to go to bed, and since Rarity's home was destroyed herself and Sweetie Belle stayed at Twilight's home for the night.

Twilight hid the weapons Leela gave her behind an invisible small transparent area on the wall in her bedroom, she then had Spike send a letter to Celestia detailing the events of tonight.

Celestia responded quickly to say she would visit Ponyville tomorrow morning to see them, she also told Twilight she has sent a small legion of the Royal Guard just in case if these Aliens were to turn hostile, so that they could quickly deal with them.

With that over with Twilight went off to bed along with Spike in the basket near her bed.

Spike never have slept in the spare room Rarity and Sweetie Belle were in, because he would get scared sleeping on his own, so thus found it hard to sleep if he was in a room all by himself.

***

In no time at all several dozen Pegasus Royal Guards armed with longswords, (that they some how held with their hooves, (despite not having any fingers.) that wore Roman Legionary like armor had stationed themselves around the Planet Express Ship to keep a watch over it.

In Leela's cabin Fry was fast sleep in bed next to Leela, while Leela herself was still wearing her tank top and wide awake thinking.

"Well this planet's germs haven't killed us yet that's a good sign. Since the natives appear to be sapient horses they might have food that me and Fry could eat, I hope it's not just grass. We could possibly have the the ship powerd by pony magic. But where would we go? This is clearly not are own universe. We may have to spend our entire lives here."

Leela closed her eye to try sleep, for all of them had one crazy night.

In the crew's quarters Bender lying on a hammock and was snoring loudly with a porno magazine held in his arms.

Comments

[Luna Effect]

Ha firstbut

So far so good but the chapters are a bit short. Buts thats ok

[Bendy]

1997682

Alright, I'll try make the next chapter a little longer.

Glad you liked it.

[Bendy]

1999130

I take it that's your favorite line from Bender in this story?

Glad you got the reference.

[Null_Void]

this is gonna be fun on the bun

[Bendy]

2023516

in space...