Vincenza stumbled, the rain drenched her coat, and the wind howled around her. She screamed into unforgiving gale all her rage, her sorrow. With a heavy heart she came to the edge of the mountain, the icy rain lashed her face, the ravenous winds ripped through her as they screeched their anger and frustration to world. The forest around her shook and trembled with the unforgiving malice of the storm, trees uprooted, animals drowned in their burrows as the heavy rain pummelled the earth bellow. She lifted her head to the sky and joined her voice to their chorus. She screamed, rebelling against the unfairness and cruelty of fate. Lightning cracked, splitting the sky in the distance and the world shaking thunder drowned out her futile sounds.
Vincenza sank to her knees, sobbing, shaking with exposure, the cold uncaring rock offering no pity. Her vision blinded by tears and rain she looked up once more at the sky.
“[Why!]” She shouted through clenched teeth, her words snatched away by the wind. “[Of all the ponies why her.]” Her head sunk to the ground, her eyes tightly shut and in a voice that even in a quiet room would struggle to make itself heard she painfully whispered. “[Have I not suffered enough? Do you get pleasure from my pain?] She sobbed and threw her head back. [Have I not given you my all!? Have I not served you well!? Bleed for you!? Fought for you!? Sacrificed enough for you!?]” She searched the black skies above looking for an answer. “[Please…Just tell me why.]” She sunk down to the wet rock sobbing, praying and pleading to the sky above for answer.
And the rolling blackness only thundered in reply, a contemptuous god scorning the sinful world beneath as a purple unicorn watched solemnly from a distance, tears of her own streaking down her face.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The previous day
Twilight reappeared at her library, the silence was deafening as she stumbled through the empty building. Her world was crashing down around her, her heart breaking.
The afternoon light in the windows seamed dull, the dust motes floating in the light danced mournfully slow. Letting her training take over whilst she retreated into her own mind Twilight dumped the tattered remains of her cloak in her room and showered. The hot water washed over her, taking the filth of the battle with it, all the while Twilight stared blankly at the wall.
I thought you were my friend
Octavia’s voice cut through her blanket of numbness, Twilight curled into a ball eyes screwed shut.
Fluttershy turning away from her, a look of disgust on her features
Rainbow turning her back on her
Applejack’s voice ‘We trusted you’
The look of sorrow on Pinkie’s face
Rarity looking through her, no recognition
Twilight let out a chocking sob, the sound built with each repetition, until it overflowed in a flood of tears. She cried and cried and cried, her tears mixing with hot water from the shower.
As she lay on the ground, exhausted, the sound of breaking glass reached her ears through the mixed sounds of the shower and her own sobbing. She heaved herself off the ground and trudged out of the bathroom into the main library area.
She checked the clock, it had been an hour.
Looking around for the source of the noise she noticed that a brick had been tossed through her window, puzzled she picked it up and looked out the window. Twilight stepped outside, bewildered.
Amassed in front of her home was a very large, very angry crowd of ponies. The crowd seemed to bristle at the sight of her, many yelled something, but in the mass of voices the only thing she could hear with any clarity was murderer.
A rock sailed out from the crowd and struck her on the cheek, tearing it. The sight of her blood invigorated the crowd, many ponies picked up rocks and launched them at the hapless unicorn. Twilight raised a hoof to fend away the incoming chunks of rock, but they hit and drew blood regardless.
Twilight stumbled backwards to stunned to take action, after the events of the previous day her mind was just to overloaded to react. To stunned to regenerate from the wounds or even defend herself with magic Twilight fell to the ground her body pummelled by the barrage of rocks. Her death seemed imminent. She cracked open an eye to take one last look at the ponies who were soon to be her killers, and there in the fore front of the crowd saw the faces of her best friends, just standing there watching her.
Her spirit broke and Twilight slumped to the ground.
The rocks pelted her; the roar of the crowd grew with each hit, each drop of blood shed working them into frenzy. Then like the lull of a storm the sound faded away, replaced by a hushed murmuring.
Twilight raised her head slowly opening her eyes, wondering if she had died and this was the afterlife. Her eyes opened fully and she found herself staring up at the sky, where Princess Celestia hung the glow of her magic illuminating her like some sort of archangel.
Celestia swept her gaze over the crowd, a look of hurt and disappointment on her features. “My little ponies.” She said. “This is not how we in Equestria deal with crimes against our people.” The crowd fidgeted in shame.
“No matter the ponies crime it is not the duty of their common peer to judge them unworthy.” She fixed them with a particularly harsh glare.
“Nor is it the place of a pony’s lesser to pass judgement.” The crowd now backed away slowly as the princess alighted upon the ground.
“Twilight is my protégé and as such only I have the authority to judge her.” The princess turned around and looked down at the bleeding unicorn. “Twilight go into the library I will deal with you in due time.”
Twilight rose from the ground and stumbled her way into the empty library.
As she made her way through the home she winced from her injuries and slowly walked over to the bathroom, using the mirror to examine herself. Looking at all the cuts and bruises she had sustained she concluded that most of the lacerations her were shallow, nothing overly urgent, but a couple were deep and required medical attention.
Pulling a first aid kit from under the bathroom sink Twilight prepared to stich the wounds shut, preferring to let her body take its course than waste energy, when she tilted her head back in a realisation.
She didn’t need to stich her wounds.
Placing the needle and suture back into the first aid kit she concentrated on her face in the mirror. She focused her mind on her wounds and willed them to shut, to heal.
They stayed open. Twilight grunted and concentrated harder imagining the wounds stitching themselves shut. She held her breath and stared at her reflection, and slowly the wounds began to close shut.
When they had finished Twilight examined her body. It was covered in scars and bruises from her fight with Vincenza the previous day, checking her body in the mirror she saw an ugly line of scar tissue running across the throat where it had been split open by the vampony’s blade.
Moving her eyes up she came to rest on her face and her heart stopped. Running along left cheek was a scar but she had never been a vain pony and didn’t much mind the disfigurement, what caused her to catch her breath were two things. Her eyes and her teeth.
Looking back at her was not the face that she had long known, it was alien and yet in some ways familiar. Her eyes had become a rich blood red, and clearly visible were the tips of two fangs. She had become the thing she hunted.
She had once had suspicions, a long time ago. But when symptoms had failed to surface she assumed that she had been wrong.
But staring her in the face was absolute proof.
Twilight stepped back from the mirror, she had known since she had woken up from the hospital what she was but between the incident in the hospital room and her minor mental breakdown she hadn’t had been able to take the time to realize it.
‘What will I do now?’ she wondered. Would she have to drink blood now? At the thought of blood her mind skipped back to biting into Octavia’s thigh. Her mouth salivated at the memory and a hunger began to well up inside her. She quickly crushed it, with some difficulty.
She staggered forward at the consequences gripping the sides of the bathroom basin as a pain racked her inside, the hunger returning with a vengeance. Taking rapid deep breaths like she was going to vomit forced herself to look into the mirror. Concentrating intently on the mirror she willed the hunger back down, the sides of the basin snapped like balsa wood they gave way from the force she exerted on the.
Twilight slipped from the breakage, her fang catching the lip of the basin. The tooth seared sharply with pain and she tasted her own blood. That gave her an idea and she sank her fangs into her own fore leg, her mouth flooding with blood.
But it did nothing the phase the growing hunger.
“That won’t work.” A voice announced from the doorway.
Twilight turned her head to see the last pony she wanted to lay eyes on in the world at that moment, and by the looks of it she had been crying, heavily.
Pulling her leg from her mouth she began to think up a retort but was cut off as the pony turned and pulled a hospital blood bag from the pouch at her side and gave it a small toss towards her.
Twilight instantly pulled it over to her with her magic and greedily chomped hard down on it. The pack exploded, most of it covering the bathroom and the shield her benefactor had raised. Twilight swallowed what was in her mouth and proceeded to lick what she could from the floor and walls.
“Well you’re a hungry one aren’t you.” The mare commented.
Twilight glared at her “What the hell did you do to me?”
Vincenza smiled “Me? I did nothing, what I want to know is why a vamp is working for vamp hunters.”
Twilight would of spat but the spit had blood in it so she swallowed instead. “I’m not a vampony.” She said out of instinct.
“Not from where I’m standing, now listen up. That blood pack should keep you going for a few hours but unless you get a proper feed you’re going to crash.” Twilight continued licking what blood she could find. Vincenza reached forward and grabbing her face with her hooves turned her face to face hers.
“But that’s not your biggest problem, if you don’t come with me you will end up dead very shortly.”
Twilight shook her head and took a step back. “What makes you think I’m going anywhere with you?”
“Because if you don’t Celestia will kill you.” The elder vampony stated.
“Your lying she would never do that to me.” Twilight took a step forward and pressed her face close to the other unicorn. “You somehow turned my friends and town against me but you can never come between me and the princess---.” She was cut off as Vincenza violently picked her up and slammed into the far wall with her magic.
“Listen to me! Celestia is going to come and kill you. The whole town wants you dead. They all think you killed Octavia!”
Twilight sharply took a breath. “Octavia’s dead?”
Vincenza grinded her teeth. “Yes.”
“How?”
Vincenza was quiet for a moment, thinking about something. “…She’s dead, that’s all you need to know.” She released Twilight from her suspension. “The fact is they all think you did it. You need to come with me.”
Twilight opened her mouth to object but Vincenza bet her to the punch. Again. “Think about it you have no other choice.”
Twilight closed her mouth as the truth settled on her like a lead weight around her neck, she had nowhere to turn. She lowered her head.
She knew better than anypony what the Princess did to murderers and with the town baying for her corpse….. “Why would you help me?” she asked feebly.
The elder examined her. “Because once upon a time I made a promise, and now it’s being collected on.” She explained. “I don’t blame you for putting Octavia in the hospital.”
Twilight raised her head, surprise written all over her face. “What? Why?”
Vincenza smiled sadly. “Believe me I want to hate you so bad right now; every fibre of my body wants to rend you into a million pieces. I want to scream at you, hit you and curse you.”
She blinked away some tears. “But it wasn’t your fault, you didn’t know better. You lost control, and I know what that feels like all too well. I don’t….can’t blame you for her death.” She extended a hoof towards the purple neophyte.
“Come with me I can take you to safety.” Twilight looked away sceptic of the elder’s claims.
The sound of a door slamming rang through the house and the sounds of loud hoof steps reached the ears of the two vamponies.
“Twilight. Twilight where are you! I wish to talk with you!” The sound of Celestia’s voice reached their ears.
Acting on instinct Twilight called out to the Princess. “In the bathroom.” Vincenza closed her eyes and sighed as the hoof steps stopped.
Another voice called out to them from the foyer. “Twilight Sparkle we require to speak with you post haste. Bring thyself down here it is imperative that we speak to you!” Only Luna had a voice that loud.
Vincenza stepped aside as Twilight walked past her. As Twilight walked down the stairs to the foyer she couldn’t help but entertain the hope that she would be able to explain to the princess that she had been framed, after all this was Celestia, the kindest wisest pony in all of Equestria.
As Twilight cleared the stairs she saw Luna standing in by the door. The night Princess turned her head and faced her.
“Where’s Ce-Woh ohh!“ Twilight was cut off as she was lifted into the air by Luna’s magic.
“Sister we have found her.” Luna called out. Twilight was only able to move a little but couldn’t move her head far enough to see the source of the hoof steps behind her. She didn’t need to, she knew who they belonged to.
As the Princess came into Twilights vision her heart sank like a stone. Celestia looked completely emotionless, the kind of emotionless she got when she was absolutely livid. She would be as receptive to her appeals as rock.
Celestia breathed calm and steady. “Twilight Sparkle my most faithful student.” She put emphasis on the word faithful.
“Princess please I can explain.” Twilight tried to speak.
Celestia remained stoic as ever. “Explain? Explain what? That you killed one of my subjects? Or would you like to explain that for years that you have been part of one of the most heinous criminal organisations in Equestria.”
Twilight flinched. “I can…” She started to speak before she was cut off again.
“You can what, explain it all? How, with more lies? How long Twilight, how long have you been laughing behind my back.”
A crack in Celestia’s mask appeared. “I sheltered you when your parents passed on, I have practically raised you ever since that day. And this is how you repay me. What did I do to deserve your hate Twilight, I have been nothing but kind and caring to you.”
“Princess...” Twilight pleaded with her mentor.
Celestia’s face turned into a scowl. “No. No more lies from you, you have made a mockery of everything I stand for, you have killed my subject and shown your true colours. I suppose this is what I get for sheltering a snake under my wing.”
Twilight began to cry. “Princess please, you have everything wrong I’ve been framed. Please!”
But the Princess was as unassailable as sun; she ignored her and continued talking. “Twilight Sparkle for crimes against Equestria and me you would be executed without a moment’s notice, but Equestria owes you a un payable debt. So you will be spared.” Twilight dared to hope.
“Instead I exile you for all eternity.”
Twilight stopped breathing, a look of shock on her face.
“Should I or any guard ever lay eyes upon you in Equestria again, you will be executed without thought or trial.”
“But but but…”
Celestia was worked up now and she would not be stopped.
“Twilight Sparkle from this moment on I burn all bridges there were between us, I cut all ties and shatter all bonds! You are no longer my student!” As she turned to leave she said in a quiet voice that Twilight only just heard. “I don’t know if you ever were.”
As she watched the pony she loved like a mother just turn away Twilight felt something primal rise up in her, compelling her to speak. She gritted her teeth and hardened herself against the tears.
“It’s all your fault!” She shouted out.
Celestia stopped and turned around. “What.”
“It’s your fault, all of this!”
“How dare you. “
“It’s because of you I joined the angles!”
Celestia stepped back like she had been slapped.
“Seventeen years ago a filly came to your room with definite proof that vamponies had killed her parents.” Celestia’s eyes widened as she recalled the memory.
“She showed you all the evidence, she told you everything she had found and what did you do? You sent her back to bed with a kiss on the forehead saying that such monsters didn’t exist. That they were just stories told to scare little fillies with hyperactive imaginations.”
Now it was Twilight’s turn to get mad.
“But you know what, your guard heard everything, and as he escorted the filly to bed he told her a story about a group of ponies that fought monsters, he asked if the filly wanted to learn more about the group. She said yes and over the course of the next six years as the filly grew into a mare she would both study during the day and train with the guard during the night, sometimes even going on ‘patrol’ with him to hunt down monsters. And no one was none the wiser about what she was up to.”
Twilight blinked away tears.
“Three years later on a patrol the guard and the mare came across a powerful monster, the guard was killed, the mare beaten and the monster defeated. But before it died it gave the mare a gift, one that she wouldn’t realise that she had for seven years.”
Celestia walked over to where Twilight was being suspended by Luna. “Let her down.”
The field around Twilight disappeared and she dropped to the ground. Twilight looked up at Celestia her eyes filled with tears, only to be sent sprawling by Celestia’s back hoof.
“Never never blame me for what you have done.” Celestia turned and walked away. “We all have choices no matter the circumstance.” She walked out the door leaving Luna alone with her.
Twilight was curled into a ball sobbing , Luna gave her a long look filled with pity, and looked to the top of the stair case where Vincenza was standing watching her. They simply nodded to each other and Luna turned and left the library.
Vincenza walked down the stairs and over to the curled up unicorn. “Come on lets get you away from here.” She crooned softly extending a hoof.
Twilight looked up into the smiling, tear stained face of the elder………
And took the hoof.
They both vanished into thin air, wisps of black haze fading where they had once stood.
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Earlier at the hospital
Vincenza looked at the door Twilight had rushed out of and turned to look at the mournful group of ponies in the room. Turning her head she took in the scene. Pinkie and Flutter shy were both sobbing quietly, Rarity looked steely at nothing at all a barely noticeable quivering in her shoulders, Rainbow looked tired and Applejack was shaking her head slowly. Glancing at Spike’s unconscious form she felt a tidal wave of guilt hit her over the baby dragon, she had blinded him, and because of his own resistance to magic no healing spells could ever restore his sight. He was permanently blind, because of her.
She stood up and slowly walked over to Octavia’s bedside she nuzzled the mare gently. “Hey.” She whispered.
Octavia tensed and Vincenza backed away. “What’s wrong?” she asked.
Octavia looked into her eyes and looked away; she looked at the group of ponies around her and slowly looked back up to the unicorn above her. Weakly she placed her hoof onto the one Vincenza had placed on her cheek.
And gave it a soft push.
Vincenza’s eyes widened in shock as she withdrew the hoof. “Why?”
Octavia opened her mouth again. ‘Because you are a monster’ she thought to herself. “I’m sorry, but what you did to Spike, to Twilight…I’m sorry it’s over.” Her voice was like a whisper, soft and sad.
And that made it all the worse.
Vincenza took multiple steps backward; she looked at the ponies around her. They all watched her with a mixture of fear and uncertainty, unsure how she would react. She took a step forward and Applejack and Rainbow both stiffened, both ready to throw themselves at her if she went for Octavia.
She looked at them both. “Please, let me say my good byes.” The two ponies remained tense until Octavia gestured to them to relax.
Vincenza stepped over to Octavia’s bedside and reached down and gently embraced her. She cradled her and whispered in her ear. “I’m sorry to.”
Time slowed as she prepared herself for what she was about to do. Before Twilight came in she had been having a long, long conversation with her benefactor about what she was to do next. And she had received some very dissatisfactory orders. She was to take Twilight and train her, become her mentor, but Twilight need to be separated from her ties first.
Part of the vampony curse was the bite. If a bitten pony was not drained they didn’t turn into a vampony as per legend, they died. And they died slow.
First the immunity system failed, if they survived that they became weak, their non-vital organs shut down one by one, the blood stopped clotting, and bones became brittle.
Then if they survived all that, their cells would undergo a slow but steady necrosis until it the pony died in unimaginable pain.
It took a year at best at worst….many before the pony died, but either way they died in agony.
Vincenza thought about all of this, trying to put what she was about to do next in a favourable somehow merciful light. She placed her hooves on either side of Octavia’s head. She kissed her on her forehead, feeling her pulse, taking in her smell, committing it to memory for what would be the last time.
She pulled away and looked Octavia deep in the eyes, she saw a love mixed deep with fear. She took a deep breath, tears formed in her eyes as she realised it shakily. Octavia placed a hoof over hers, Vincenza turned away from her.
She quickly, violently, wrenched Octavia’s head to the limit and beyond of what a head should turn. She heard a sickening crack and pop, her breath caught in her throat.
It was clean and painless, Octavia deserved that and so much more but it was all she could do for her.
The ponies around her started to step back, their faces showing they were about to scream. Vincenza’s eyes glowed red as she quickly stood from the side of the bed and spun around sweeping her eyes across theirs. They stiffened, neck muscles bulging as they tried to scream making muffled chocking sounds, their eyes widened in absolute fear.
Looking deep into each of their eyes, she projected her mind into theirs. She could feel their panic as they all felt her inside their head, she heard them scream what they could not verbally articulate.
She ignored their cries and began doctor their memories, altering them.
When she was finished she flicked a ‘switch’ in their heads and they fell unconscious. Extracting herself from their minds she wiped away her metaphysical ‘finger prints’ they wouldn’t remember any of this when they woke up.
She walked over to Spike, summoning a scroll and quill she quickly wrote a note outlining that Octavia had been killed by Twilight and that the Princesses were needed soon. Leaning down to Spike’s ear she held the scroll in front of him. Clearing her throat quietly she spoke in a perfect imitation of Twilight’s voice. “Spike.” She whispered. “Could you send this pretty please?”
Spike mumbled something and blew, a small green flame ignited briefly. But that was all she needed and the scroll was sent on its way. Vincenza straightened up and grabbed one of the blood bags from the emergency cart in the room and teleported away.
She reappeared in her old room in her and Octavia’s house, the clean-up long since over down stairs. She looked around, mementos of Octavia were everywhere.
The indent she left in the bed, her hair scattered everywhere, her picture on the bed side table, a drawer filed with spare collars and pink bowties.
She walked over the big double bed they had shared and sunk to the ground, balling her eyes out.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The pair of vamponies appeared in the same clearing that Vincenza had taken Octavia to the previous night. Twilight examined her surroundings concluding that she was in the Ever Free, no other forest had the same….malice.
“Where are we?” She asked.
Vincenza ignored her and walked into the cave mouth, motioning to her new companion to follow her with a jerk of her head. Twilight hesitantly went after her after a short moment’s pause. She walked into the cave, the noon sun dimly illuminating it. Puzzled by the elder’s choice of location she opened her mouth to say something…..and promptly closed it when she came to the opening of the cave tunnel.
Twilight gazed at the cavern in wonder. “What is this place?” She asked.
“My sanctuary.” Vincenza turned to face Twilight. “And as of now…yours as well.”
Twilight raised an eyebrow inquisitive eye brow, Vincenza smiled at her. “You are young Twilight you need someone to teach you. Would you like to be my student?”
Twilight blinked a couple of times at her until the brain had registered what she had asked. “What.”
“Twilight, would you like me to teach you?” Vincenza asked for a second time.
Twilight looked around the cavern, thinking. She had just been disowned by the Princess, her friends hated her for something she didn’t do, she had turned into a creature she had dedicated most of her life to destroying and now one of the most infamous of their kind was offering to tutor her. She looked at Vincenza. “I don’t know…”
“Twilight…do you have many other options?”
“….fine.”
“Eccellente. We will begin your training in the morning, until then take a look around and make yourself at home I need to go complete a couple of..... errands, a presto.” With that the elder vanished in a puff of black smoke.
Twilight looked around her surroundings before giving a sigh and resigning herself to exploring the cavern.
Seems I'm the first one here! I caught quite a few spelling and grammatical errors but nothing I couldn't fix in my own head to make sense. Bit of an interesting turn in general.. Curious as to where this will go next. Is Octy really gone or will she come back somehow?
this just got... interesting to say the least.
1133782Yeah check my blog post as to why I couldn't edit it. My editor sent me the edited version...my brother only let me use his laptop for ten minutes, no where near enough time.
1133846Yep
Many manly tears were cried for vinyl and tavi
So octivia is dead why did it had to come to this ! Please tell me she not dead
Ok overall this was a good chapter but Id feel the main 6 were out of charter
I was holding we would we octivia being turned but no she dies I would understand that I would be angry at some one if they hurt and or blind someone but not to the point to trow rock at that person
Celestia's banishment was reasonable but to the point of killing her if she or a gard see's twlight dude that's bucking mean.
Please answer my question I don't care if is going to be a spoiler
But very interesting story
1133908She dead trust me it was NOT easy to write that, not at all also main six were not outa character, if you recall Vincenza messed with there heads, they think twilight killed Octavia and were 'suggested' not to go easy on her.....think on that.
And yes I am mean
1133927
( insert crying pinky pie gif here)
Well there goes my sleep btw I'm in Canada and it's 2:24 right now
1133945PAH SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK
You killed Octavia, that was pretty brutal, even by my standards
shocking, but a needed death in order to spur the story on.
What will happen to Vincenza now that she has nothing to live for beyond training the one person she hates the most.
1134770 Shenanigans ....and stuff
Brutal? Nah I can do way more....
1134895 Not sure if I should be excited or terrified as to what more entails in this story.
just kidding, more please
Ok it has been over 12 hours since you post chapter 7
Now that I've stop crying I'm going to predict something
In the following caPters were going to find out what's venchncha's brothers going to do. He's going to resurrect/turned octivia and make her kill her ex mare friend
Twlight gets killed out of request
1138940No twilight becomes incredibly baddass, Demarco isn't going to actually be in the picture for a while yet (aside from some pretty awesome flash backs) and Vincenza may/may not be going crazy with guilt.
....
Also if Octavia came back (not saying she will) then I doubt she would need much motivation to go after Vincenza.
.....
Also Twilight should be killed why?
1134992Be afraid be very afraid
ok is there a chapter seven part two or are you going to leave us hanging for another two months for the next chapter
i think i understand why it took too long it's because of killing Octavia thing, or is it the fact you are lazy
btw are you a girl i feel like you are
1140421 because she pissed me off and would've given octavia a horrible long painful death if vincenza killed her
1144342True true there is that....
1144284 I admit it I am kinda lazy when I write, mostly cause I wait until I really want to and don't sit down and force it like I should. Sorry bout taking so long and with end of year exams I'm sure I'll take while with chapter 8.
Also I feel very emasculated right now, just wondering why you thought I was a chick? Is it the way write?
1146675 yup it's the way you write no offence please don't hate me
1148580No...I'm just going to go sulk in the corner
I really liked how this story started. I really enjoyed some of your world building and I enjoyed the vinyltavia that was going on. I don't enjoy where you've taken it anymore, and I'm honestly sad to say I won't be following it anymore because I think you destroyed what really kept this story grounded. That little bit of ground i'm talking about was Octavia. With her in the story we had reason to root for vinyl and Octavia overcoming their problems with each other. Now though without her vinyl has no anchor and from what I can see no reason or motivation to do anything besides some cliched promise/favor she made that her honor won't allow her to break. I understand that you as the author aren't writing for everyone, and I think you have interesting ideas as a writer. But I don't like how you've destroyed the only redeemable character you had. From my point of view it feels like you did it to get a shock reaction from your readers... it worked i guess, but it feels like a cliched moment in a video game (homefront: hiding in piles of bodies or MW3: little girl).
But i'm just one person and I respect you for writing a story for other people to read. I hope i'm wrong and you do have some masterful plan to work through everything that I now dislike about this story, but I no longer find myself enjoying this story...
Respectfully
--NAT
Octavia
1166443It was a mercy
Still sucks though
i was really loving the story (and i'm still am) for i just Vinyl Scratch and Octavia (but i love Vinyl more) but when i got up to the bit when Octavia dies i stopped reading the rest for 2 days straight because i just really can't handle tragedy stories very well and reading about what just happened to Octavia i had just burst into tears.
Well, I'm depressed. Let's see, you've turned Twilight into a vampire. Oh, pardon my mistake, vampony. Celestia has something of a heart, so that's good. But I feel like she is still going to die eventually. Twilight's friends turn against her. At least two of them are going to die in a Vendetta (my prediction anyway) Or they are going to become Vampony Hunters and try and kill Twilight and the pony whose name I can't spell. The other one. Octavia's dead. That bites and no pun intended. But man is this a gripping story. I am fully captivated, but you do know my dilemma when I say time can be an issue, hence the delay on both my story posting and reading this. Excellent job.
Okey are you almost done with the next chapter
1352843Sadly no but now that I have two weeks (sorta) free I will begin making head way
FUCK. I missed the opportunity for 200th comment along with my 100th comment.
I'll be back...
1382988And I'll be waiting
All most done?
1439128Sadly that monster called end of year exams has started to rear it's head and all forces have been diverted to combat it
Also have a new fic that was taking up some of my time before the muster was sounded
1447122The reason for everyone blaming Twilight is simple (puts on sunglasses) please look into the little red light here.......
Also things are slightly more complicated that they appear
Also I never said Luna was a particularly clever pony
well you just killed of octy...............must not cry................FUCK